Don't blame the dogs, blame the owners.

[mercrocker]

If its of any relevance I still hate Ford Capris because of the pointy-collared polyester-threaded footballer-haired brut-soaked knobheads that used to drive them and pull all the birds.  Though maybe I should not have pretended to own one to that bird in the flicks when it was patently an Austin A35.   All of which I know is my problem, but I still hate Ford Capris.   As much as BmW X--- insert your chosen number.  Though, at least Capris do not shit their gearboxes out to the ratio of 3.4143141 engines....

[Junkman]

If you want a pick up, why not demonstrate some fuggin taste?

 

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/1964-CHEVROLET-C10-STEP-SIDE-PICK-UP-ORIGINAL-FACTORY-PAINT-WITH-PATINA-CHEVY-/300956255895

 

Fuggin yee fuggin haw, where's my fuggin toy pistol?

[explosive-cabbage]

If you want a pick-up, why not a Great Wall Steed?

 

See quite a few of them around here, though farmers don't yet seem convinced. Also see a lot of personal plates around here, but that's genuinely to make it easier to spot your friends I think. They don't seem to have much trouble spotting me in my random old shite though...

These look great.

I fear they my go down the route of the Tata Load-luggers and be worth sum total of 57 pence in 9 years time when they destroy various engine/suspension/driverrain components which are as rare as rocking horses.

Future load-lugging shite for us Autoshiters...

[Junkman]

Did someone say pick-up?
 
http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/CLASSIC-VINTAGE-1960-PEUGEOT-403-PICKUP-TRUCK-LHD-/200960196779

[Albert Ross]

Amateurs. This is what we need. Tax free too.

[Junkman]

Don't blame the dogs, blame the French.

 

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/CITROEN-HY-H-VAN-/111166310644

[ShiteRider]

Vauxhall Omega

All the ones i see are either giffer owned and towing caravans with their arses draging on the floor or battered sheds driven by wannabe drifters who think they're Ken fuggin Block when it rains.

Which is a shame as even though im not a particular Vauxhall fan i do like omegas ( mk1 3.0 elite auto please santa

[Micrashed]

 

Of course you could be beating off the Quim with a shitty stick if you had one....

[Partridge]

I think these are quite useful too.

nissan-navara-teaser.jpg

Driven a few of these for work. Ok until the chocolate driveshaft poos itself and leaves you stranded by the side of the road.

[Junkman]

The pinnacle of usefulness has always been hidden in plain view though.

 

 

Blame who the fugg you want, I'm not responsible...

[Spiny Norman]

I like BMWs and have either owned or driven most of them over the years but I really don't see the point of the X5, or any of the X range come to that.

As an 'Ultimate driving machine' it's worse in every single way than a regular E39 5 series, and as an off roader it'll be shown the way home by just about anything else with 4 wheel drive. Or 2 wheel drive come to that.

 

Could be worse, could be this thing...

 

On the pick up thing, I REALLY don't understand pick ups in the UK.

Seriously, can someone explain to me what the advantage of a vehicle with an insecure, open to the elements cargo area is in a country with so much rain and thieving cunts?

OK I know you can get covers for them and even fibreglass hardtops, but wouldn't you be better off with a van? What can a pick up do that a van can't?

[Junkman]

Whenever I get a BMW as a hire car, I decline and ask for something different. I just don't want to be associated with a BMW owner/driver. I don't have much pride left in life, but this is one of my last stands.

[alf892]

Confession,

 

I had an X5 for a couple of years as a company car.............it was nice enough. It was a lease car but when I collected it after a service I was often surprised at what had been done to it and what it had cost.

Never used it off road but it was OK for snow. I deliberately drove it 'nicely' and didn't let it push its way to the front in traffic.......

 

I would not pay to own one though.

[alf892]

oh.............and just to complete my status as a complete tosser another confession.

 

I think Corsa Bs are fukkin great little things........had one (19961.2 8v) for nearly 6 years now and it has cost beans to run.

[Sigmund Fraud]

The pinnacle of usefulness has always been hidden in plain view though.

 

Blame who the fugg you want, I'm not responsible...

 

Note the discreet sticker of Autoshite's favourite* van club in the back window... That tells you all you need to know !

 

I'd still feel less ashamed driving this than an X5, though

[STUNO]

oh.............and just to complete my status as a complete tosser another confession.

 

I think Corsa Bs are fukkin great little things........had one (19961.2 8v) for nearly 6 years now and it has cost beans to run.

AGREE..I bought a Corsa B (1995 1.4 CDX 21,000 miles 500 pounds) for a runabout while in UK. It's a basic car but goes well, but why does everyone else HAVE to pass me, even when at the speed limit (+).

[Partridge]

I like BMWs and have either owned or driven most of them over the years but I really don't see the point of the X5, or any of the X range come to that.

As an 'Ultimate driving machine' it's worse in every single way than a regular E39 5 series, and as an off roader it'll be shown the way home by just about anything else with 4 wheel drive. Or 2 wheel drive come to that.

 

Could be worse, could be this thing...

 

On the pick up thing, I REALLY don't understand pick ups in the UK.

Seriously, can someone explain to me what the advantage of a vehicle with an insecure, open to the elements cargo area is in a country with so much rain and thieving cunts?

OK I know you can get covers for them and even fibreglass hardtops, but wouldn't you be better off with a van? What can a pick up do that a van can't?

Agree with what you say about liking BMWs, but not the X range.

 

I use them at work (pickups) and they're a whole lot more practicle than vans. You can lob stuff in the back, and grab it again without having to go hunting in the semi dark. And also things like big heavy fuck off bags of earth are bastards to move at the best of times, so imagine getting on in and out of a van. At least in a pickup you can jump in the back and shovel it out. They're also easier to clean out.

Many of them have off road capability, which in my work is a major plus.

As for people nicking stuff, we only put low value stuff like shovels and buckets in the back, or things like bags of postcreate and wood which is hard to nick descretly. I've never had anything gone missing from the back of a pickup yet.

Anything of value/danger such as chainsaws goes in the cab.

 

You can get pikey hard tops to go over the back as well, if you feel the need. I fitted a load cover to the L200, which is no different to one that goes in say, a Volvo.

The other good point is they're a little nicer to drive than vans, and when you're in and out of it all day, or use it as a normal car at weekends, that's a big plus.

[cort16]

I like BMW's and I'm sure the X5 is nice enough but with all these big Fancy 4x4's it all status as a normal estate car could do everything better.

BMW seems to have got itself trapped into ever more niche markets. Does the world really need an X1, X3, X5 and X6?

 

The X1 is particularly honking and about the same size as the old X3, which is now the size of the old x5 and so on.

 

You know you've maded it in life when you're driving a Brown X118d

 

[cort16]

I also see BMW have resurrected another performance Model from the past. The awesome 518i but this time as a 518d.

 

Grim

 

http://www.parkers.co.uk/company-cars/news-and-advice/latest-news/2013/may/bmw-5-series-saloon-10-on/

[alf892]

Totally agree with above.......they create the need and present a lifestyle dream and produce the car to fill it. It has nothing to do with what we need or we would all be driving Dacias. Or not.

 

Marketing. They are good at it.

 

btw........in my defence i didn't choose the X5......it was inherited with the job

[Junkman]

btw........in my defence i didn't choose the X5......it was inherited with the job

There must be decent ways to feed a family...

[chaseracer]

Pickups?  Is this not Autoshite...?

 

 

[Partridge]

[Junkman]

SUVs? Is this not Autoshite?

 

 

 

 

[Junkman]

Need lifestyle designer decals? Step right this way, Sir:

 

[Junkman]

And who needs a BM fuggin W anyway?

 

[overrun]

towing a jet ski to some unspoilt coastal resort to ruin it for everybody else.

 

Hey! I own a jetski. There's barely anywhere we are allowed to use them, thanks to moaners and the sailing boat types etc. They don't even make much noise.

 

Well, mine doesn't, because although it is modified, I still have the resonator/silencer box inline with the exhaust, that a lot of people replace with a length of 4" soil pipe.

 

It's getting harder and harder to use a ski somewhere. Partly due to the standup types doing tricks etc but mostly down to needless moaning.

 

They're a right laugh.

 

Agreed on the plastic chrome Navara/L200 mongs though!

[Sigmund Fraud]

For all your SUV needs :

 

 

For all your pickup truck needs :

 

[overrun]

Duly noted, watanabe.

 

The best place I have been with it is Exmouth.

Like the Med in comparison to launching it in a filthy river Wear or the North Sea.

 

I think we were meant to buy a daily slipway pass there. They even had female life guards riding them. #Baywatchasfuck

 

I did have an annual slipway pass for Hartlepool Marina, but the damn thing broke on my first time there.

So I have came to the conclusion that paying to use the facilities is bad luck.

[Junkman]

For all your SUV needs :

 

 

 

Can I have that in beige?