Tropes you see on the road

[Metal Guru]

13 minutes ago, dozeydustman said:

Diehard Ford owner. Never seem in the UK to get die-hard fans of Vauxhall, Peugeot, Rootes, BL etc that go to the same extremes as followers this particular marque. Thankfully they seem to be dying out.

Learned to drive in a Ford, has only ever had Fords, wants his funeral procession to be a Ford hearse with Ford cars in the cortège.

His dad owned a Ford, his dad’s dad owned a Ford. Uncle Jim also drove a D-Series 28-tonner (ironically with a Cummins engine) delivering building materials, and he won’t acknowledge the Ford Cargo lorry range as a real Ford as Iveco made them from 1986.

He won’t speak to uncle Bob as in 1974 he replaced a Cortina 1600E with a Vauxhall Magnum. Even though he replaced it a Cortina 2.0 GL in 1980, by 1983 there were car brochures from Vauxhall, Austin-Rover and the most unholy make of them all, Talbot, alongside a booklet showing the new Orion.

DieHard will own any car as long as it has a blue oval on the front. Any other marque is inferior. House is full of photos and models of various Dagenham dustbins and Cologne-built rammel, plus the occasional Michigan model. Any Ford is more powerful, does more MPGs and has better roadholding than any of its rivals. And that’s a fact.

Ensures his kids will only own Fords by helping them choose their first car by only driving them to see Fords they have picked out. This is despite all the Escorts, Orions, Cortinas, Sierras and Granada he’s owned in the past having multiple issues from poor maintenance (oil burning, rattling camshaft), or rotting out within 5 years of being made, he swears by them, because his dad did, and his dad’s dad did. Uncle Bob can sod off, he defected with that Magnum when DieHard was 8 years old. Disowned his son when his work gave him a Peugeot Boxer as a company van as Ford didn’t tender a bid for the fleet.

Now approaching 60, he’s just treated himself to the latest Kuga in top spec. DieHard dreams of owning a Capri 3.0 or a Sierra Cosworth.

Just like steadfast Elvis fans being absolutely horrified when someone doesn’t like ‘The King’, any critique against the marque will be received in the same manner as entering his home with a dog chod on the sole of your shoe.

My Dad had a Ford Popular, Cortina’s Mk3,4 & 5, and a Granada Mk2. He “defected” to Volvo (pre Ford ownership), because the Granada Mk3 range  didn’t include an estate. There was a Bedford CA before the Cortina’s. 

I started off Fiesta, Orion, Escort, Sierra and Mondeo but haven’t had a Ford since 1998.