The most useless feature of a car?

[martc]

23 hours ago, Barry Cade said:

An American sued McDonalds because their coffee was hot. 

Have you read a modern car handbook 😆

 

22 hours ago, grogee said:

Handbook.

And I say this as someone who writes them for a living.

Readers of the bikeshite thread may be aware that I have bought a Californian made Zero electric motorbike. Being from the US I fully expected the handbook to be a) absolutely full of legal disclaimers and patronising ‘advice’ and b) there would be no advice about maintenance other than 'take it to the dealer'. But, to my surprise, the legal get outs are there but very brief, it is written in a laid back style, treats the rider as a grown up and it includes extensive maintenance advice. But....

....like my Peugeot and the Moto Guzzi before it it was only available as a download! The Peugeot and Guzzi at least had brief pamphlets outlining the mere minimum  - what the warning lights mean etc, but for full details download the manual; from the internet. The Zero had no pamphlet but did come with a USB stick with the full manual on it.

But what an absolute disgrace. It's obviously a cost saving for the manufacturer but no use to me when trying to work out what does what in a dark country lane. Someone I know may have printed out the handbooks, double sided, two pages on each side, for me.

 

[RoverFolkUs]

22 minutes ago, High Jetter said:

Yes, you can't really call it driving unless you have to double de-clutch at least once!

Ok, grandad 

😉😆

(No, I wasn't going to let that one slide! )

 

[AxWomble]

40 minutes ago, High Jetter said:

Yes, you can't really call it driving unless you have to double de-clutch at least once!

I do find this useful for smooth downshifting, in all fairness 😂 and for maintaining speed if you need to drop a cog on a steep uphill

[AxWomble]

41 minutes ago, High Jetter said:

Yes, you can't really call it driving unless you have to double de-clutch at least once!

I do find this useful for smooth downshifting, in all fairness 😂 and for maintaining speed if you need to drop a cog on a steep uphill

[treehugger]

You can say that again. 

[DavieW]

My Corolla has a bar running along the bottom of the media screen showing the time elapsed of the programme I'm listening to. 

[grogee]

59 minutes ago, martc said:

 

Readers of the bikeshite thread may be aware that I have bought a Californian made Zero electric motorbike. Being from the US I fully expected the handbook to be a) absolutely full of legal disclaimers and patronising ‘advice’ and b) there would be no advice about maintenance other than 'take it to the dealer'. But, to my surprise, the legal get outs are there but very brief, it is written in a laid back style, treats the rider as a grown up and it includes extensive maintenance advice. But....

....like my Peugeot and the Moto Guzzi before it it was only available as a download! The Peugeot and Guzzi at least had brief pamphlets outlining the mere minimum  - what the warning lights mean etc, but for full details download the manual; from the internet. The Zero had no pamphlet but did come with a USB stick with the full manual on it.

But what an absolute disgrace. It's obviously a cost saving for the manufacturer but no use to me when trying to work out what does what in a dark country lane. Someone I know may have printed out the handbooks, double sided, two pages on each side, for me.

 

We did that too. 

NB: Manufacturers usually only print a handbook in markets where it is compulsory eg China and USA I think. Most markets now get a 'quick start' guide which gives you the basics plus a QR code to get the full handbook online.

The thinking is you should have internet connectivity down that dark country lane and can therefore access the manual. Although most of the country lanes I frequent have fuck all mobile coverage let alone 4G.

The other argument for online literature is that we're able to update mistakes and cover new software rolled out which a print version couldn't do. (More applicable to cars than bikes though I'd agree).

Which Zero is it? They look great although I'm not a biker so don't know my arse from my elbow with bikes really. 

[Cheggers]

Cruise control is a godsend with motorway roadworks and average speed cameras.

[EyesWeldedShut]

1 hour ago, RoverFolkUs said:

Ok, grandad 

😉😆

(No, I wasn't going to let that one slide! )

 

So if I was taught to double declutch both down and up through the gears does that make me a Great Grandad?

[martc]

54 minutes ago, grogee said:

1

The thinking is you should have internet connectivity down that dark country lane and can therefore access the manual. Although most of the country lanes I frequent have fuck all mobile coverage let alone 4G.

2

Which Zero is it? They look great although I'm not a biker so don't know my arse from my elbow with bikes really. 

1 Which, as you say, is a bonkers idea, in my part of the world there's many areas where you can't get a radio signal nevermind anything more sophisticated! Whipping the book out of the glove box and leafing through take's but a moment.

2 It's a Zero SR and it's blinkin' ace - many more details in the bikeshite thread.

[CortinaDave]

1 hour ago, Cheggers said:

Cruise control is a godsend with motorway roadworks and average speed cameras.

I love cruise control. I drive the A90 regularly between Dundee and Aberdeen and the whole thing is average speed cameras. It stops me constantly checking my speedo

[FakeConcern]

I also love criuse control too, the only problem is it isn't adaptive in my car. I should add that when we shared a V70, Mrs Concern never even once used the cruise control. I frequently drive from East Sussex to Norwich and use it all the time, the main problem is other drivers, for a while now there has been a 40mph average speed check section on the A11 both ways so put CC on at 40mph and then keep lowering the speed setting as most seem to go at about 36mph and I catch them up! (also means I gradually change down from 6th to 3rd gear and any hope of good fuel economy goes out the window). Talking of windows, I do like climate control I put it on Auto in my Volvo and Mrs Concern's Modus and just leave on, never open the windows or sunroof. My Volvo has dual zone so Mrs Concern has her side at least 2 degrees hotter than mine.

[lesapandre]

1 hour ago, martc said:

1 Which, as you say, is a bonkers idea, in my part of the world there's many areas where you can't get a radio signal nevermind anything more sophisticated! Whipping the book out of the glove box and leafing through take's but a moment.

2 It's a Zero SR and it's blinkin' ace - many more details in the bikeshite thread.

Print a copy and keep it with the vehicle is my approach.

Here in the UK it may be ok to be without physical docs - but in France there is no mobile coverage in large area I go to - and 'les keufs' (it's the new slang for les flics) always want docs - hence better to print everything.

[yes oui si]

2 hours ago, Cheggers said:

Cruise control is a godsend with motorway roadworks and average speed cameras.

I use it whenever I'm on a main road tbh. Okay, around here that only really means the a1 or a697 but the point still stands. 

For roadworks, just use GPS to find out what your speedo reads when you're doing a genuine 52mph, remember that number and set your cruise for that when you need to. 

Mrs_oui_si isn't a fan of cruise control, but she drove a Defender for years... 

[AnnoyingPentium]

I like cruise control, it's brilliant on avg speed and long limited zones. Don't have it on the Scabia, but the Duster's got it along with the speed limiter. It's great on the 50mph stretches of the A77 (Symington) and the A71 (Crosshouse to Killie)

[Cheggers]

I use it whenever I'm on a main road tbh. Okay, around here that only really means the a1 or a697 but the point still stands. 
For roadworks, just use GPS to find out what your speedo reads when you're doing a genuine 52mph, remember that number and set your cruise for that when you need to. 
Mrs_oui_si isn't a fan of cruise control, but she drove a Defender for years... 

Defender cruise control = brick on the throttle

[RoverFolkUs]

1 hour ago, Cheggers said:

1 hour ago, yes oui si said:

I use it whenever I'm on a main road tbh. Okay, around here that only really means the a1 or a697 but the point still stands. 
For roadworks, just use GPS to find out what your speedo reads when you're doing a genuine 52mph, remember that number and set your cruise for that when you need to. 
Mrs_oui_si isn't a fan of cruise control, but she drove a Defender for years... 

Defender cruise control = brick on the throttle

Isn't defender anything just hit it with a brick? 

Won't start, hit it with a brick. Horn not working, hit it with a brick.. etc 🤣

[Remspoor]

4 hours ago, Cheggers said:

Cruise control is a godsend with motorway roadworks and average speed cameras.

Maybe we should start a discussion on what crap road laws/ ideas there are around. Here in Spain I have not found any ASC. Neither in France or Belgium. Maybe I have been lucky?

[Split_Pin]

I'm gonna be in the minority here and say I hate cruise control. I end up getting frustrated with a slightly slower driver in front on the motorway, whom I always seem to encounter right at the time someone else is overtaking, so I have to knock it off! I guess I feel less in control rather than just checking on my speed.

It's not useless obviously though, it just doesn't suit me.

[RoverFolkUs]

9 minutes ago, Remspoor said:

Maybe we should start a discussion on what crap road laws/ ideas there are around. Here in Spain I have not found any ASC. Neither in France or Belgium. Maybe I have been lucky?

It's only mainly during roadworks and not isolated to motorways, dual carriageways have it as well, an example being the A23 had ASC in force for absolutely ages when they regenerated it probably 10 years ago now 

It's better for them than putting a fixed camera in place because in periods of traffic it's never going to catch anyone, whereas if there's a camera at the start and one at the end it's easier to catch people off guard over a longer period while the traffic is flowing nicely 

TLDR; revenue generation 'innit

[RoverFolkUs]

Electronic power steering. Just no.... 

I know it's for efficiency by not running another ancillary off the engine, and environmental impact by using one less fluid, and you don't have to bolt a PAS pump to the engine and route a load of hydraulic lines but in my opinion hydraulic PAS is superior in so many ways

[High Jetter]

I've never had a car with cruise, and don't see the need. Drivers should be continually aware of their speed, direction and surroundings, inc other vehicles IMHO. (Shields to maximum, Cap'n)

[RoverFolkUs]

LED external lighting

This is a real irk of mine, I hate that everything is one combined LED assembly and should one light fail you have to replace an entire cluster at ~£50 at the very least. Make that £2/3/4/500 if it's a front headlight! 

How much is an incandescent bulb, 50p, so for the cheapest LED light unit you've got to be making sure the LED lasts 100x longer than a bulb. Which they don't. 

They look shit, they're dazzling, but they look modern and futuristic so I suppose that's why they do it

[loserone]

All of us who use cruise control on motorways and fast A roads are well aware of those who don't, because there's nothing like speeding up and slowing down 1-3mph all the time for absolutely no reason.

 

[Split_Pin]

Just now, loserone said:

All of us who use cruise control on motorways and fast A roads are well aware of those who don't, because there's nothing like speeding up and slowing down 1-3mph all the time for absolutely no reason.

 

I rest my case.

[Soundwave]

Well, lesson learned. Don't mention cruise control, apparently quite a divisive subject. Oopsie. 😅



So, moving hastily on... excessive amounts of cup holders. Maybe it's  because I don't have kids, but I don't see why manufacturers seem intent on making a car able to hold an entire cafeteria's worth of cups at any given moment. They're in the door pockets, the centre console, the glovebox lid, on the backs of seats, in the rear armrest... if there are more cupholders than seats, there are too many.

[loserone]

1 minute ago, Split_Pin said:

I rest my case.

Your case being you join the dickheads instead of reading ahead and just passing them? 🤣

[Split_Pin]

2 minutes ago, loserone said:

Your case being you join the dickheads instead of reading ahead and just passing them? 🤣

What can I say, I mustn't be as brilliant as you.

[Spiny Norman]

14 hours ago, High Jetter said:

I've never had a car with cruise, and don't see the need. Drivers should be continually aware of their speed, direction and surroundings, inc other vehicles IMHO. (Shields to maximum, Cap'n)

Aye there's some on here who get un-necessarily prickish about it if you say anything against CC, I've had it before from a few of them.
My experience is that it increases my stress levels because I'm constantly having to actively monitor and adjust my speed via a stalk on the steering column rather than relying on the sub-conscious 30+ years of eye-to-right foot muscle memory that enables me to blend my speed to match the general traffic flow without thinking using the accelerator, which seems perfectly suited to that purpose.

And anyone who thinks they can detect another car's speed varying by 1mph at motorway speeds is kidding themselves on, but if cruise control, auto lights, wipers, lane assist steering, even brakes that come on automatically so you don't have to think for yourself are what it takes for you to get to your destination, so be it. I prefer to pay attention when I'm behind the wheel.

Anyway... To me there's a difference between useless and simply annoying features. Useless ones I can just not use (Like aforementioned cruise control, ski flaps in the boot, the radio, back seats etc) but it's the badly designed or badly executed ones that piss me off, like light bulb sensors that cry wolf, rain sensing wipers that will either drag the blades across a totally dry screen or sit there idle while it's chucking it down or the special one my Saab has, which is parking sensors that don't know there's a BFO towbar on the car. First beep means I'm about 3 inches away from punching a hole in someone's bumper...

 

[Cheggers]

I wondered how long it would take for the hair-shirt "using modern driver aids makes you a lesser driver" argument to get trotted out.