RoverFolkUs Posted March 10, 2022 Share Posted March 10, 2022 As above, inspired by the shed of an Audi A6 I've just posted in the tat thread. Starting off with "treatable in the absence of common sense" dome, sutty2006, neil1971 and 6 others 4 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RoverFolkUs Posted March 10, 2022 Author Share Posted March 10, 2022 (Hoping there isn't one of these threads already, but couldn't find one following a quick search) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndaBoss Posted March 10, 2022 Share Posted March 10, 2022 Manuel RoverFolkUs 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MiniMort Posted March 11, 2022 Share Posted March 11, 2022 Oh Facebook Marketplace, never change goosey, RoverFolkUs, LT84 and 2 others 1 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ProgRocker Posted March 11, 2022 Share Posted March 11, 2022 "First to see will buy" What if the first person viewing decides against it? RoverFolkUs, Pete-M and Eyersey1234 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HMC Posted March 11, 2022 Share Posted March 11, 2022 “Excellent pre accident condition” RoverFolkUs, MisterH, GeordieInExile and 2 others 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Daviemck2006 Posted March 11, 2022 Share Posted March 11, 2022 Will pass mot no problem. Why not fucking mot it then?Sent from my SM-T585 using Tapatalk RoverFolkUs, GeordieInExile, LT84 and 3 others 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pieman Posted March 11, 2022 Share Posted March 11, 2022 15 hours ago, AndaBoss said: Manuel Remspoor, Faker, AndaBoss and 1 other 1 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GeordieInExile Posted March 11, 2022 Share Posted March 11, 2022 "It is what it is, it ain't what it ain't" - I quite enjoyed seeing this the other day on an ad for something with no MOT in need of welding and a clutch. RoverFolkUs 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goosey Posted March 11, 2022 Share Posted March 11, 2022 Bad bits - all cars ave em Crackers, RoverFolkUs and dome 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RoverFolkUs Posted March 11, 2022 Author Share Posted March 11, 2022 51 minutes ago, HMC said: “Excellent pre accident condition” Just like "ran and drove before it was parked up in 1984" Eyersey1234, Jerzy Woking and lesapandre 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RoverFolkUs Posted March 11, 2022 Author Share Posted March 11, 2022 "Easy fix just haven't got the time as I've bought a new car" - car is FUBARed in every way imaginable "Selling for a friend" - no, you're a dodgy private trader who has no explanation for why the V5 is missing or not in your name "Cambelt snapped and engine beyond repair" ....... Followed by "ran perfectly beforehand and had a full service a month ago" 🤦 warch 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
neil1971 Posted March 11, 2022 Share Posted March 11, 2022 Description of issue e.g. missing reverse gear followed by 'but it never bothered me' Full MoT history (wow) Anything where the make & model is spelt incorrectly - there's usually a badge on the back if you're not sure Genuine reason for sale - impending mechanical doom is certainly a genuine reason JJ0063 and RoverFolkUs 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sutty2006 Posted March 11, 2022 Share Posted March 11, 2022 “Restored 30 years ago” so it needs doing again then. RoverFolkUs 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crackers Posted March 11, 2022 Share Posted March 11, 2022 "great patina" No, you mean the paint's fucked RoverFolkUs, LT84, warch and 1 other 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HMC Posted March 11, 2022 Share Posted March 11, 2022 “I have not tried to operate xyz” (eg commonly- sunroof) The sunroof doesn’t work. RoverFolkUs 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HMC Posted March 11, 2022 Share Posted March 11, 2022 “The v5 will need to be applied for” Never a good sign. What else is missing in action? Get ready for a 5 week wait before you can sell it (big turn off for idiots like me) Eyersey1234, RoverFolkUs and Matty 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
83C Posted March 11, 2022 Share Posted March 11, 2022 I still see the odd advert with something like “10 months tax remaining.” Yes, if you don’t sell it. But as it’s for sale, it’s totally fucking irrelevant. warch, RoverFolkUs, AxWomble and 1 other 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RoverFolkUs Posted March 11, 2022 Author Share Posted March 11, 2022 Ok its not a car advert, but still Facebook marketplace LT84, Dan_ZTT, grogee and 11 others 1 13 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mrcento Posted March 12, 2022 Share Posted March 12, 2022 13 hours ago, RoverFolkUs said: "Cambelt snapped and engine beyond repair" ....... Followed by "ran perfectly beforehand and had a full service a month ago" 🤦 In a very similar vein. 'Had the car for 4 years, been totally reliable, started every time until it didn't, will need trailered away'. I always read that as 'Car had a horrible hard life, never serviced, ran it into the ground and now the timing belt that was probably 4 years and 20k miles overdue has let go or a small coolant leak lead to an overheat which has cooked the engine'. Throw in 'I don't know what's wrong with it, i'm not a mechanic'. Sure Jan, it's just not worked one day and you've immediately just fired it up for sale not knowing if it's a 20p fuse or if the Engine has detonated and are willing to lose out of thousands' And 'MOT due soon, will pass with flying colours' Yeah, sure. Stick it on for one then, sell with a years ticket for way more?, No?.... thought so. Honourable mention for 'Don't come expecting a new car, it's 20 years old'. You can bet it's rough as fuck. Crackers, LT84, RoverFolkUs and 1 other 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lesapandre Posted March 12, 2022 Share Posted March 12, 2022 'Needs recommissioning before use' Posh-eze for it's neglected and knackered. 'Price on Application' We are a bunch of toff ****ers. 'Easy fix' - if you own an F1 racing team. 'Parts included' - no I can't be bothered to fix it either. 'Boot full of spares' - a used clutch in an old box, several unidentifiable rusty parts, two old spark plugs, some rope and an oily pair of old underpants. 'Lady owner' - great we can discuss your many prejudices while I inspect the car. 'Rare car' - yup the rest have been mercifully scrapped. 'Find another' - go on do I get a prize? 'Celebrity owner' - yes it was Ronnie Corbett's hairdresser's. 'Titled owner' - ah the age of deference isn't over. I will sent my butler round to collect.🧐 '90% complete' - yup I flogged the valuable and totally unobtainable bits elsewhere. 'Barn find' 😫 'Transferable registration plate' - you really don't like historic cars do you? 'Non- transferable registration plate' - yea I flogged the nice old number that had been on it from new. 'Personal reg included' - whatever that indecipherable jumble of numbers and letters signifies? 'Personal reg not included' - so why show it in the ad? 'Personal reg not included' - I am going to faff about for weeks before you can collect the car. 'Need to apply for V5' or the more passive-aggressive - 'V5 lost'. 'Great winter project' - I think I'll stick to roasting chestnuts and stoking the fire... 'Patina' 'Goodwood' 'Rare slime green version with the desirable check trim' - no one in the rest of world cares... RoverFolkUs, dome, LightBulbFun and 4 others 6 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sierraman Posted March 12, 2022 Share Posted March 12, 2022 16 hours ago, HMC said: “The v5 will need to be applied for” Never a good sign. What else is missing in action? Get ready for a 5 week wait before you can sell it (big turn off for idiots like me) Driveway trader waiting for the V5 through. Poor spelling in general on an advert is a big warning of what you are walking into. Also what’s on the radio? If it’s Radio 2 or 4 then probably it’s a good ‘un. Photos - where is it parked? On a quagmire in front of a house where the number is painted in foot high gloss by hand then forget it. RoverFolkUs and NorfolkNWeigh 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RoverFolkUs Posted March 12, 2022 Author Share Posted March 12, 2022 "has a knocking noise, been told it's just a clip/hanger/peg (delete as appropriate) on exhaust but haven't got the time to sort and not got mechanical knowledge" - usually written by someone who's always selling cars and has loads of car adverts on their profile - means something is terminally fucked big time or it's been subjected to year of neglect which means it has no chance of passing it's next MOT Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SRi05 Posted March 12, 2022 Share Posted March 12, 2022 "FULL MOT" *Checks vehicle enquiry service* NO MOT ❌ Why do cunts do this LT84, RoverFolkUs, twosmoke300 and 2 others 1 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lesapandre Posted March 12, 2022 Share Posted March 12, 2022 FULL MOT - Once.. RoverFolkUs 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sierraman Posted March 12, 2022 Share Posted March 12, 2022 4 minutes ago, SRi05 said: "FULL MOT" *Checks vehicle enquiry service* NO MOT ❌ Why do cunts do this Will be MOT’d on purchase. At which time it’ll be too late to renege on the deal when it’s discovered it smokes like fuck. RoverFolkUs 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RoverFolkUs Posted March 12, 2022 Author Share Posted March 12, 2022 Very popular when approaching the final months of the year - MOT until next year Actually, we're in December and it expires the consecutive January.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RoverFolkUs Posted March 12, 2022 Author Share Posted March 12, 2022 6 minutes ago, sierraman said: Will be MOT’d on purchase. At which time it’ll be too late to renege on the deal when it’s discovered it smokes like fuck. Or perhaps issued an MOT certificate on purchase, whether it actually visits the test station is a different matter! 😅 sierraman 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sham Posted March 12, 2022 Share Posted March 12, 2022 One of the reasons why I'd rather have a 3 month MoT issued 8k miles ago, than a fresh one on purchase. My favourite that I've seen recently - great condition, will need welding for MoT. RoverFolkUs 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SRi05 Posted March 12, 2022 Share Posted March 12, 2022 19 minutes ago, sierraman said: Will be MOT’d on purchase. At which time it’ll be too late to renege on the deal when it’s discovered it smokes like fuck. I genuinely think there's some folk who don't realise the look up service exists. Pure lies about a car's condition, then you look up the MOT and it has a shopping list of advisories dome and RoverFolkUs 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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