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Most stupid message while flogging a shiter


Alan Prost

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1 hour ago, DodgyBastard said:

Some from today...

 

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it's actually really solid underneath but like this cunt I'm unwilling to go out of my way to take photos. I might send him a photo of a pile of shit..

 

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This cunt was never going to buy it.

 

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No fucking chance.

 

I love telling these cunts to piss off.

I wouldn't be giving out my address.  Post code.  And phone me when you arrive and I'll direct you to the house. 

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47 minutes ago, sierraman said:

What’s this fixation people have with swapping things? To anyone vaguely sensible it’s ‘swap my fucked car for your less fucked car?’.

What ever happened to money being the medium of exchange? I wouldn’t go down Asda later and offer to swap some waney lap fencing for a joint of pork.

Lack of cash flow, since that sort obsess over £300 remaps to get black smoke, and smelly 'green substances' to smoke themselves they can't afford to buy another car and sell theirs later, nor can they go without a car to pickup aforementioned substances if they sell their heap first!

If they want to swap, it's pretty certain that the reason will be because they know they'll never get back the thousands they've ploughed into it.

Or they've modified it so much they know it hasn't got a chance of passing the upcoming MOT so want to offload it before it hasn't got any ticket remaining. 

Unless it's a genuine set of circumstances where a swap would make sense, nothing good ever comes out of one

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A short story from my uncle regarding selling a 51 plate Merc ML270 back in May 2007.

He had it listed on eBay and in local newspapers (remember that) and received a phone call from a bloke speaking in broken English asking to view the car. The bloke said he wanted it and would "send wife" to collect it at the price listed in cash with no haggling. Alarm bells began to ring but a time was agreed as he was happy for it to go as he'd bought a new car even if the sale was a bit bizarre.

A car of some description then turned up a few hours later and he opened the front door to three woman clad in black Jilbabs (I believe that's the correct term) who thrust a brown envelope of cash at him "for car" and saying they "need key".

Slightly taken aback by this he told them to hang on and he would get the V5C, let them examine the car, and get them to fill in the green section. There was a bit of back and forth in possibly Punjabi and they then said they didn't want the V5. He then insisted that they had to fill it in there and then but they kept refusing. He then told them he wasn't selling the car to them under those circumstances and asked them to leave. After a bit of confusion due to the language barrier they departed and the car, with a male driver, sped away.

All quite strange.

Fast forward a few weeks and early one morning there was a sudden loud chap at the door and several serious looking men in suits with English accents (we're in Glasgow) were holding up warrant cards and declaring themselves as Special Branch Anti-Terrorist officers who were investigating the recent terror attack on Glasgow Airport.

It turned that the women who tried to buy his ML were the wives of the terrorists who wanted it for the attack and but for his suspicions his car would have been infamous. In the end it was a Jeep Cherokee that was used.

 

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9 hours ago, Split_Pin said:

Swapping is NEVER biased in your favour. Just don't. 

I’ve only ever swapped a car once and it went well. I do however appreciate how very lucky I was and it’d very unlikely ever happen again. 
 

I had a 2010 Astra J 1.7 CDTI, discovered ‘Swapz’ and thought I’d give it a go. Got offered a 2007 BMW E90 325D but the chap was in Cornwall and I am in Norfolk.
 

Ended up arranging to meet at Gordano services, he turned up when he said he would, we straight swapped and off we went. I loved that BMW and eventually sold it for more than I paid for the Astra.
 

Fully understand it was a one off and that site is typically full of absolute horrors. 

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Looking online this is the scam apparently. They also never refer to the item by name as these 'offers' are sent out in large numbers. So they say is "this" still for sale etc.

What totally time-wasting horrible people - what a way to spend your time. Web seems full of grifters these days.

" If you accept, they tell you to pay a 50 quid insurance for DPD that will be refunded once the items are delivered, but the DPD site they send is a fake one and you lose 50 quid"

 

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22 minutes ago, lesapandre said:

 

" If you accept, they tell you to pay a 50 quid insurance for DPD that will be refunded once the items are delivered, but the DPD site they send is a fake one and you lose 50 quid"

 

Who falls for that?

Selling an item on FB. They want to send the cash and collect later. But then I have to pay insurance for them to send the cash?

FRO

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Maybe the 'insurance' is for the item in transit - it may also be a data collection scam to get card details. 

Some more on the DPD stuff:

https://www.which.co.uk/news/article/dont-get-caught-out-by-this-dpd-text-scam-aHNAf7z5UPNA#:~:text=The text appears to be,small fee for 'redelivery'.

So instead of the 'we missed you' way of gathering data they do it the other way round - as you arrange for a 'collection'. Possibly the fake site asks for insurance to get the card details?

But whatever way round - its a scam. It's the data they are after - no one will ever collect the item.

 

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Common ebay terminology - selling car, won't take buy it nows or lowest price, but car is for sale elsewhere, and I 'reserve the right to remove etc etc'

Buyer refuses to acknowledge 'not asking buy it now' because of a technicality, with his 'hang on ...', oh no you caught me out.
Oh no, it turns out he's an enthusiast. I would rather deal with skint council estate types than enthusiasts.

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8 minutes ago, DavidB said:

Common ebay terminology - selling car, won't take buy it nows or lowest price, but car is for sale elsewhere, and I 'reserve the right to remove etc etc'

Buyer refuses to acknowledge 'not asking buy it now' because of a technicality, with his 'hang on ...', oh no you caught me out.
Oh no, it turns out he's an enthusiast. I would rather deal with skint council estate types than enthusiasts.

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Does he want to sell the car or otherwise. Surely if someone approaches you wanting to view and has cash in their hand you’d have them round?

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I think some people get confused they’re selling a fucking Hispano Suiza at Coys not a 2005 Astra on Gumtree. Waiting to see how the market reacts and holding high level talks with investors. Bids under tender, Non disclosure agreements, due diligence reports on potential buyers that sort of thing. 

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1 hour ago, DavidB said:

Common ebay terminology - selling car, won't take buy it nows or lowest price, but car is for sale elsewhere, and I 'reserve the right to remove etc etc'

Buyer refuses to acknowledge 'not asking buy it now' because of a technicality, with his 'hang on ...', oh no you caught me out.
Oh no, it turns out he's an enthusiast. I would rather deal with skint council estate types than enthusiasts.

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makes you want to make a fake account and bid 10k on it 

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I think DavidB is the seller?

I kinda get the buyers point that expecting him to drive however many hours to then drive home and bid on the auction is not something I'd be up for.

As the seller you must have a price in mind and if he can come and pay cash so you don't get bummed for ebay fees this sounds like a win to me. 

The numpties that bid on it sight unseen must have a 5% chance of ever turning up and collecting and you just sent a fairly genuine sounding buyer away?

TBF if I was the buyer I wouldn't have bothered sending #8 I would have just left it and moved onto the next one, whatever it is if its a PD130 sport its one of many.

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I’m with the seller. The buyer either needs to look for cars that are Buy it Now so he can drive 7 hours, view and buy, or for auction cars that are not 7 hours away. 
The buyer wants it all their way and is struggling to understand that their ambitions are not important to the seller. 
The seller can choose to sell or not however they wish. 
In recent years people have been encouraged to become too precious about their own needs and wants.  This thread is fab fun because of this!

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36 minutes ago, inconsistant said:

I’m with the seller. The buyer either needs to look for cars that are Buy it Now so he can drive 7 hours, view and buy, or for auction cars that are not 7 hours away. 
The buyer wants it all their way and is struggling to understand that their ambitions are not important to the seller. 
The seller can choose to sell or not however they wish. 
In recent years people have been encouraged to become too precious about their own needs and wants.  This thread is fab fun because of this!

No, I’m sorry but I disagree. Putting a car up for auction, saying it’s for sale elsewhere, but not allowing anyone to come and buy it is a cunts trick. They either want to sell it or auction it.  
 

either auction it off, or sell it on classified ad. It’s that simple. 
 

what the seller really wants is the bids to go higher than what they want for it. Who doesn’t? But going about it the wrong way makes them look cuntish. They put “for sale elsewhere” to cover them to pull the auction if bids don’t get high enough. Another way of saving money by not putting a “reserve” on it. 

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1 hour ago, sutty2006 said:

No, I’m sorry but I disagree. Putting a car up for auction, saying it’s for sale elsewhere, but not allowing anyone to come and buy it is a cunts trick. They either want to sell it or auction it.  
 

either auction it off, or sell it on classified ad. It’s that simple. 
 

what the seller really wants is the bids to go higher than what they want for it. Who doesn’t? But going about it the wrong way makes them look cuntish. They put “for sale elsewhere” to cover them to pull the auction if bids don’t get high enough. Another way of saving money by not putting a “reserve” on it. 

I agree with this. Advertising elsewhere as well as an auction is fine in my book but if someone won't let someone come to buy it then it's not really on.

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4 hours ago, Cookiesouwest said:

Who falls for that?

Selling an item on FB. They want to send the cash and collect later. But then I have to pay insurance for them to send the cash?

FRO

That's the point. It immediately flags someone as gullible enough. If you engage with it and begin the process then you've essentially 'qualified' yourself for their time. You're worth stringing along a bit further. The poor english and obvious set-ups for these scams act as a filter to sort the marks from the non-marks. 

It's brilliant really.

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