dozeydustman Posted May 13, 2019 Share Posted May 13, 2019 @shedenvy - "Sis. We appreciate your efforts with the decor and the kids, don't mind you wanting to come round once a [time period] to spend an afternoon/evening/have lunch/dinner with us or babysit if wife and I want to go out, but we need our space. The wife and I have need of a bit of time together alone as a couple of an evening in front of the telly etc and we don't have time as a family - parents & children - to do family things; we've started to feel overcrowded and feel you should think about going back to your flat" OR "would you mind going back to your flat for while; we need time with the kids as a family and Mrs Shed and I need time to mong out on the sofa of an evening to crap tv and a glass of vino. We don't mind if you stay here if you've been looking after the kids for us and we're back late; or we've invited you round for dinner and you've had a couple of drinks" if neither subtle approach works just be upfront - sis, you've overstayed your welcome, please go home. strangeangel and myglaren 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chaseracer Posted May 13, 2019 Share Posted May 13, 2019 The quote "fish and house-guests begin to smell after three days" has been attributed to lightning conductor, dollar bill botherer and general smartarse Benjamin Franklin. But that's not entirely helpful right now. Soz, like. brownnova 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DoctorRetro Posted May 13, 2019 Share Posted May 13, 2019 Fucking fed up with my total lack of talent or even staying power with anything. I spend my whole life either bodging and making do, or giving up and moving on to the next mess. This usually applies to cars, jobs, furniture, relationships and probably more. Just that. I'm a fucking joke. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
colnerov Posted May 13, 2019 Share Posted May 13, 2019 2 hours ago, shedenvy said: from my outsider perspective the Horsey community seems to have the grafters in the gutter and the aristocracy paying peanuts. 'twas ever thus. myglaren 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stanky Posted May 13, 2019 Share Posted May 13, 2019 Shedenvy, I can't help with most of it, but look at WPS Office - its free for non-business use (just tick 'personal' and it never bothers you again) and is all but identical to the MS Office suite. It opens normal .xls and .xls spreadsheets (and all the other extensions) and can save back down to them too. It looks identical to Office 2015 and has all the functions. There is literally no point getting MS Office. It has spreadsheets, Word Processor and presentation programs - So Excel, Word and PowerPoint respectively. The Moog and mercrocker 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shedenvy Posted May 13, 2019 Share Posted May 13, 2019 Thanks for all yor suggestions regarding subtle hints and also the MS software. I've returned home after 2 hrs stuck on A12 and sister has put a coat of paint on the little bathroom. I told her that the ceiling didn't need doing but she went ahead and painted it with SODDING GLOSS FOR WOODWORK the twonk. That's two more f***ing coats it didnt need doing again then. BorniteIdentity and myglaren 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cavcraft Posted May 13, 2019 Share Posted May 13, 2019 (Don’t ask for pictures of sister) GrumpiusMaximus, sporty-shite, stonedagain and 1 other 1 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
omegod Posted May 13, 2019 Share Posted May 13, 2019 Moved to a new worksite today after a rehuffle, my previous place was an absolute joy to work in with ace people you could have a laugh with, new place is like a fucking wax works museum Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MikeR Posted May 13, 2019 Share Posted May 13, 2019 M6 from Preston to Lancaster ,,, it has a bridge on it that a lorry tried to knock down last year towards Lancaster resulting in the bridge span being held up by girders and poles ... its still like that ,,, which means ,, is it getting fixed when a smart motorway upgrade arrives ..... ???? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
taxi paul Posted May 13, 2019 Share Posted May 13, 2019 My last foster child moved out about six weeks ago. So I am enjoying not having to deal with anyone at the minute. Then gets a reminder today that I have to attend compulsory training next week. It's an education day and run by the virtual school . Or people talking shite to justify their job. Wouldn't normally mind but Wednesday is Widnes market shite sale. Sort of car boot but with worse stuff. Also getting lectured about helping with homework strategies and attendance enhancing solutions is a bit eastedbon me. The kids I get are usually expelled from school and have no intention of going anyway. Also there is fuck all anyone can do about it, the kids know this very well. So I listen to bollocks and not my head in the right places. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jazoli Posted May 13, 2019 Share Posted May 13, 2019 M6 from Preston to Lancaster ,,, it has a bridge on it that a lorry tried to knock down last year towards Lancaster resulting in the bridge span being held up by girders and poles ... its still like that ,,, which means ,, is it getting fixed when a smart motorway upgrade arrives ..... ????Yeah I pass that every couple of days and wonder when they are ever going to get round to fixing it, can't see them turning it into a 'smart' motorway though. MikeR 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paulplom Posted May 14, 2019 Share Posted May 14, 2019 I've used open office for over ten years. Great bit of kit and free to download. myglaren and LightBulbFun 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GrumpiusMaximus Posted May 14, 2019 Share Posted May 14, 2019 Had an all-staff meeting yesterday at work. At the end, the new Grand Overlord showed us a video of all of the good things that have happened over the last year. Which was actually quite nice. If it hadn't gone on for ten bloody minutes. The worst thing is that everybody was still lapping it all by the end, braindead... puddlethumper 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brownnova Posted May 14, 2019 Share Posted May 14, 2019 9 hours ago, taxi paul said: My last foster child moved out about six weeks ago. So I am enjoying not having to deal with anyone at the minute. Then gets a reminder today that I have to attend compulsory training next week. It's an education day and run by the virtual school . Or people talking shite to justify their job. Wouldn't normally mind but Wednesday is Widnes market shite sale. Sort of car boot but with worse stuff. Also getting lectured about helping with homework strategies and attendance enhancing solutions is a bit eastedbon me. The kids I get are usually expelled from school and have no intention of going anyway. Also there is fuck all anyone can do about it, the kids know this very well. So I listen to bollocks and not my head in the right places. Hide your phone under the desk like the kids in school and browse Autoshite all day... myglaren, chaseracer and taxi paul 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
New POD Posted May 14, 2019 Share Posted May 14, 2019 9 hours ago, Jazoli said: 9 hours ago, MikeR said: M6 from Preston to Lancaster ,,, it has a bridge on it that a lorry tried to knock down last year towards Lancaster resulting in the bridge span being held up by girders and poles ... its still like that ,,, which means ,, is it getting fixed when a smart motorway upgrade arrives ..... ???? Yeah I pass that every couple of days and wonder when they are ever going to get round to fixing it, can't see them turning it into a 'smart' motorway though. It's fixed. Well it's still up and there's a concrete barrier to protect it. What more do you need? Looks shit. But I like to think as I head north, well that's the border. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cavcraft Posted May 14, 2019 Share Posted May 14, 2019 Hard to get what you’re moaning about, tbh. Facebook’s most prolific contributor passed away this morning, we’ll never see the likes of him again. brownnova, Amishtat, Floatylight and 3 others 4 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chaseracer Posted May 14, 2019 Share Posted May 14, 2019 The Chester Jester, folks. He's blue, he's back, and you're welcome to him! ? puddlethumper, jumpingjehovahs, Cavcraft and 1 other 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HillmanImp Posted May 14, 2019 Share Posted May 14, 2019 15 hours ago, TheDoctor said: Fucking fed up with my total lack of talent or even staying power with anything. I spend my whole life either bodging and making do, or giving up and moving on to the next mess. This usually applies to cars, jobs, furniture, relationships and probably more. Just that. I'm a fucking joke. Hey, thats what everyone does. I wouldn't sweat it. jumpingjehovahs, The Moog, sporty-shite and 5 others 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iainrcz Posted May 14, 2019 Share Posted May 14, 2019 Came down stairs this morning and got wet feet. The boiler had pissed itself and was making fizzing noises. No hot water or heating. Isolated it at the fused switch underneath and turned all the inlet/outlet taps off underneath to stop it leaking. Bollocks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mercedade Posted May 14, 2019 Share Posted May 14, 2019 16 hours ago, TheDoctor said: I spend my whole life either bodging and making do, or giving up and moving on to the next mess I have more respect for someone who can do this, than someone whose whole approach is "ha LOL no idea I just pay someone". Anyone who can bodge/make do gets a doffed cap from me - and same goes for people who know when they're beat. No joke about it man - you're doing it more right than you realise. myglaren, chodweaver, Jerzy Woking and 10 others 13 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cavcraft Posted May 14, 2019 Share Posted May 14, 2019 What a load of old bollocks that 'Desert Island Discs' is. Surely the first record anyone would want is the long distance swimming one? brownnova, DeeJay, mercrocker and 4 others 3 3 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Datsuncog Posted May 14, 2019 Share Posted May 14, 2019 16 hours ago, TheDoctor said: Fucking fed up with my total lack of talent or even staying power with anything. I spend my whole life either bodging and making do, or giving up and moving on to the next mess. This usually applies to cars, jobs, furniture, relationships and probably more. Just that. I'm a fucking joke. Not that it's much consolation, but you're basically describing me as well. And I don't even have a Rover that will survive a zombie apocalypse. The Moog, mercedade, myglaren and 1 other 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DoctorRetro Posted May 14, 2019 Share Posted May 14, 2019 35 minutes ago, Datsuncog said: And I don't even have a Rover that will survive a zombie apocalypse. Neither do I, it belongs to Billy now. I even gave up on that. ? Cavcraft 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MikeR Posted May 14, 2019 Share Posted May 14, 2019 Nooooooooooooooooooo..... I have to go into Southport. ..... Not the road to hell again .... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mercrocker Posted May 14, 2019 Share Posted May 14, 2019 I think a common perception amongst some on here is that greatness has never been achieved, things have never been completed and that life is basically a good bit shittier than it could be. I don't think those feelings are unique or common to only a few - it is just that many other people bullshit and overplay their own lives and make it seem as if we are "missing out". Some clever fella once wrote to the effect that "the mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation". We only make sense of it all when its nearly over...... It just seems ironic that those on here who appear the most self-deprecating actually have many of the most interesting things to say. Chin up, fellas...... chodweaver, Inspector Morose, Brodders and 8 others 11 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
somewhatfoolish Posted May 14, 2019 Share Posted May 14, 2019 22 hours ago, shedenvy said: <snip> - Sort out an electronic version of invoicing her clients (excel) - Some sort of quoting system for potential new clients - help choose an account to earn her the best interest rate on some money she's accrued. - help her make a decision about moving to France and getting a UK loan to buy a property circa €40K in Brittany where my Mum & Dad live. This is the only option she'll ever have to 'own' a property Anyway, does anyone have any advice on how to tactfully say FO. Or any free templates on how to invoice or prepare a quote for people - she only had about 6 clients a year so I guess quickbooks or similar wouldn't be practical. Oh and her MS office subscription has run out so if anyone can point me to a cheaper version than £5.99 a month i'd also appreciate it. Do you really need to be tactful about it; if you can't be blunt with a sibling who can you be blunt with? I second the Open Office suggestion, free is the best price. How long is the money being invested for? As for the last one, good luck with that(how long is a piece of string, B****t, does she speak french, etc) . Will a UK bank loan money on a french property without making you jump through a million hoops? Especially as she's self-employed in a relatively precarious way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shedenvy Posted May 14, 2019 Share Posted May 14, 2019 @somewhatfoolish This uk loan is apparently the best way. I would have thought a french loan for a french house makes more sense but apparently #BecauseFrance goverment didn't like that foreigners were buying property, getting bored and buggering off without paying the loan. No it has to be over a certain amount like €125k or something. However yes your statement about self employed jumping through hoops is almoast certainly the case. Got round to asking ina round about way when she was planning on sleeping at her flat - might be on for Wedesday or Thursday once I've figured out how the boiler works, fixed the washing m/c and set up the freesat. Oh and the gloss ceiling she did yesterday looks fucking awful. The emulsion is going to have a hard time covering it. How do you make such am obvious mistake? It smells of oil, it's called satinwood, it's so much thicker as it goes on FFS! brownnova 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
myglaren Posted May 14, 2019 Share Posted May 14, 2019 6 hours ago, paulplom said: I've used open office for over ten years. Great bit of kit and free to download. I used to but Libre Office split off a few years ago. It is very similar but as it is bundled with Ubuntu and Linux Mint then that is the one I use, simpler that way. Also use Google Docs quite a bit as it is very easy to share with any interested parties. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lord Sterling Posted May 14, 2019 Share Posted May 14, 2019 On 5/13/2019 at 5:34 PM, TheDoctor said: Fucking fed up with my total lack of talent or even staying power with anything. I spend my whole life either bodging and making do, or giving up and moving on to the next mess. This usually applies to cars, jobs, furniture, relationships and probably more. Just that. I'm a fucking joke. Don't worry so much about it man. I'm pretty much shit at most things and fairly average at others. I just had to accept it and keep trying to muddle my way through life. HarmonicCheeseburger, Cavcraft, Amishtat and 3 others 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cavcraft Posted May 14, 2019 Share Posted May 14, 2019 2 hours ago, TheDoctor said: Neither do I, it belongs to Billy now. I even gave up on that. ? Ahh, but it doesn't mean you won't get any money out if it! Shall we advertise it on Facebook? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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