The grumpy thread

[chaseracer]

Big Yellow Taxi...?

[anonymous user]

1 hour ago, chaseracer said:

Big Yellow Taxi...?

Or,

Oh Lord won't you buy me a Mercedes Benz

[mitsisigma01]

Big hammer for Crackers 😁

 

[Crackers]

2 hours ago, chaseracer said:

Big Yellow Taxi...?

See how far I get, then if it goes all smokescreen on me again, then yes! 

[Fumbler]

14 hours ago, Crackers said:

Well, that was a bit of an incident. 

Back at my parents' now, but the car is on the naughty step. OSF brake decided to become a smoke machine in quite a big way - thick, acrid black smoke pouring out the wheel arch. 

Now the smell of burnt friction material is stuck to my jumper and I've got to somehow drive it home tomorrow. 

Arse biscuits. 

I feel your pain. I was 20 miles into a 180 mile journey when my NSF brake hung up big time, like, couldn't go faster than 40 big time. I must've got used to the smell because the interior stank when I attempted to drive a couple of days later.

 

Also Snapchat FTW.

[Crackers]

6 minutes ago, Fumbler said:

I feel your pain. I was 20 miles into a 180 mile journey when my NSF brake hung up big time, like, couldn't go faster than 40 big time. I must've got used to the smell because the interior stank when I attempted to drive a couple of days later.

 

Also Snapchat FTW.

Yikes. Yeah, the stench hangs around, it's stuck to my jumper so I'm now breathing it full-time. Joy. 

And yes, Chapsnat. 

[Fumbler]

4 minutes ago, Crackers said:

Yikes. Yeah, the stench hangs around, it's stuck to my jumper so I'm now breathing it full-time. Joy. 

And yes, Chapsnat. 

Nothing like the odd whiff of friction material.

With bonus scorched asbestos if it's old enough.

[somewhatfoolish]

I love the smell of gently roasted Ferodo in the morning; smells like Victory Autoshite.

[New POD]

15 hours ago, Crackers said:

Well, that was a bit of an incident. 

Back at my parents' now, but the car is on the naughty step. OSF brake decided to become a smoke machine in quite a big way - thick, acrid black smoke pouring out the wheel arch. 

Now the smell of burnt friction material is stuck to my jumper and I've got to somehow drive it home tomorrow. 

Arse biscuits. 

Happened to me just before lockdown 1.0 on a visit to my son's in Brum.  In the wife's Astra.

Borrowed his tools and diasembled the brakes in his underground car park. Cleaned it up. Greased it all. Put it back together.  It's done 10k since with no issues. 

[richardmorris]

16 hours ago, Crackers said:

Well, that was a bit of an incident. 

Back at my parents' now, but the car is on the naughty step. OSF brake decided to become a smoke machine in quite a big way - thick, acrid black smoke pouring out the wheel arch. 

Now the smell of burnt friction material is stuck to my jumper and I've got to somehow drive it home tomorrow. 

Arse biscuits. 

If nothing is obviously sticking and or leaking, it could be the internal structure of the flexible hose breaking down causing a one-way valve blockage.

[Crackers]

Well, the drive home went fine, I didn't touch the brake pedal once in the first 20 miles, had to brake a couple of times in Milford, then managed the remainder of the journey (in the absolutely pissing rain) without braking at all again. 

Focuses the senses, but on the other hand I got great MPG! It's the small wins 😉

[Crackers]

52 minutes ago, richardmorris said:

If nothing is obviously sticking and or leaking, it could be the internal structure of the flexible hose breaking down causing a one-way valve blockage.

Interesting thought, I'll keep that in mind. 

I need to go and rifle through the receipts and find out which of the calipers was replaced a couple of year ago, I know one was but can't remember which. 

[richardmorris]

22 minutes ago, Crackers said:

Well, the drive home went fine, I didn't touch the brake pedal once in the first 20 miles, had to brake a couple of times in Milford, then managed the remainder of the journey (in the absolutely pissing rain) without braking at all again. 

Focuses the senses, but on the other hand I got great MPG! It's the small wins 😉

I had this problem in the x1/9 a few years ago. Braking caused one calipers to stick on - not great on the motorway when it could change lanes braking!  Hoses looked ok, but the one was only allowing brake fluid out, and not back.

[Fumbler]

54 minutes ago, Crackers said:

Interesting thought, I'll keep that in mind. 

I need to go and rifle through the receipts and find out which of the calipers was replaced a couple of year ago, I know one was but can't remember which. 

In my case half the piston seal had twisted causing the piston to stick. A shame because the piston looked fine and the rest of the caliper looked spotless.

[reb]

Last night I dropped a nearly empty pack of cigarette filters off the sofa and the cats squirrelled it away somewhere. No problem, it was nearly empty anyway.

Today I got in from work, threw my tobacco and stuff on the sofa, again the new pack of filters bounced off. And yet again the cats have been away with it as soon as it hit the floor.

I don't know where they're hiding them but I'm not amused. I think I have a spare pack somewhere so I don't need to go to the shop for more tonight, let's hope they don't steal that one too!

[richardmorris]

11 minutes ago, reb said:

Last night I dropped a nearly empty pack of cigarette filters off the sofa and the cats squirrelled it away somewhere. No problem, it was nearly empty anyway.

Today I got in from work, threw my tobacco and stuff on the sofa, again the new pack of filters bounced off. And yet again the cats have been away with it as soon as it hit the floor.

I don't know where they're hiding them but I'm not amused. I think I have a spare pack somewhere so I don't need to go to the shop for more tonight, let's hope they don't steal that one too!

I think your cats have a serious addiction!

[richardmorris]

30 minutes ago, richardmorris said:

I think your cats have a serious addiction!

Only panic when they can work the lighter!

[crad]

45 minutes ago, reb said:

Last night I dropped a nearly empty pack of cigarette filters off the sofa and the cats squirrelled it away somewhere. No problem, it was nearly empty anyway.

Today I got in from work, threw my tobacco and stuff on the sofa, again the new pack of filters bounced off. And yet again the cats have been away with it as soon as it hit the floor.

I don't know where they're hiding them but I'm not amused. I think I have a spare pack somewhere so I don't need to go to the shop for more tonight, let's hope they don't steal that one too!

its a sign from above saying to smoke nonfiltered rollies

[reb]

2 minutes ago, crad said:

its a sign from above saying to smoke nonfiltered rollies

I would but I'm absolutely incapable of rolling without a filter no matter how hard I try! Don't even have any train tickets for roaches!

[loserone]

Never use train tickets for roach, it's thermal ink.

 

 

Green card from a packet of rizlas best, or some proper roach card.

[reb]

10 minutes ago, loserone said:

Never use train tickets for roach, it's thermal ink.

Does that mean it'll kill me even faster? Marvellous!

I did have a big book of roach cards (with 420 individual roaches in it, oooh) but it seems to have gone missing.

I could always use the boxes from my medication, it's medical so it must be healthy!

[loserone]

It might just make you feel ill.  Anything unbleached and non- glossy best.

[loserone]

Christmas cards might work.

Tear to size - keep square

Start to roll, but then

Flip over and roll the other direction instead

That way you have a perfect S inside.

Tickle the fluffy bit with a lighter to singe and stop it from gunking up too quickly.  Cut (not torn) edge to to your lips.

[Dick Cheeseburger]

We arrived back home earlier after a few days away staying with Mrs DL's family. We took the dog with us but left her bed in the kitchen. 

Our friendly, cat-loving neighbour has been feeding our cat while we've been away. As always, I left a tray down for him and the neighbour has been popping in a few times each day to feed him, fuss him and let him out. We always limit him to the kitchen when we're away just to keep things simple. It's a tried and tested routine which has worked successfully for years. 

It was really interesting* to return to a kitchen STINKING of cat piss. Upon closer inspection, I discovered that whilst our dickhead cat has been using the tray for dumps, it appears he's used the dog bed as a urinal for the duration. It was literally dripping in piss. The bed was a decent quality hammock setup with deep-pile insert because greyhound. 

I've had to bin the entire bed and insert as it's gopping. How our neighbour didn't notice the issue we do not know. 

I've since given the floor two thorough cleans with disinfectant and have kept the bastard cat outside for the duration.

Nothing at home has changed in the last three years and the cat is only around six years old. What the hell was he playing at - is it just because cats ultimately are dickheads?!

[chaseracer]

Yes.

BWAAAAAHAHAHA, etc. 

(meow)

[myglaren]

My daughter's cats have been left pretty much on their own for three months while she has been in hospital, her kids are never home, only pop in occasionally to feed the cats, otherwise it is left to me.

Most of the doors kept closed but the kids have left them open and the cats have shit and pissed all over, especially the kitchen that had no door on it - removed in 1990.

I hung a new door to keep them out but despite being cleaned a dozen times it still stinks.

Doesn't help that I can't stand cats and dogs.

[Dick Cheeseburger]

Do you remember Game On with Samantha Janus? Remember the red haired fella who was affectionately referred to as, 'You ginger tosser, Martin'? 

That's the point I'm at with our ginger tosser right now! Tempted to change his name to Martin actually...

[Dyslexic Viking]

I like cats but as with people some are stupid idiots and some are not.

[wuvvum]

Cats can apparently get pissed off when their hoomans go away for long periods, and the pissing and shitting everywhere is their way of expressing their displeasure. 

[mitsisigma01]

2 hours ago, myglaren said:

her kids are never home,

Your grandchildren .... don't they listen to you...