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The Doctor's travels through time. Fin.


DoctorRetro

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Definitely meant as a very light hearted joke. I'm sure the person who posted it would be mortified if they thought they had upset you.

All the best Doctor with your current troubles.

Please don't let the things get to you, take any help available and look after yourself.

Hope you have an awesome Christmas and Happy New Year. 2020 has been terrible for many and hope in 2021 your personal situation improves.

Take care.

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Hope things get better for you, re the air leak I don’t know if I’ve posted this before but when I used to run veg a few people on the veg forum sweared by adding a low pressure lift pump to the line feeding the mechanical pump. This small bit of pressure did away with any annoying air leaks ruining the vacuum pulling the fuel through. Obvious any small leaks you had were worse when you were trying to pull a more vicious fuel though, adding this small pump solved them. 

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That's a decent shout re the lift pump. I have one I was going to add, but wasn't sure if it was worth doing. 

 

Metro has gone in today to get the clutch done. I had to drop it off in a lovely* area near Barking and get the train home. I fear I might never see it again. But at least it will cost a third of what a local garage quoted. 

 

As for 'jokes' and 'banter', I am autistic, so I take most things literally and get upset by a lot of comments. I do realise that sometimes people aren't being serious, but then how do you tell? I'm fed up with having to second guess the world, I wish everyone would just say what they mean. 

I understand that this forum is probably the wrong place for me because if this, hence why I'll be limiting my activity here, for my own sanity. 

 

On a related note, I've been referred by my doctor for further investigation / testing so I can have an official diagnosis - but it's quite clear from my discussions with the doctor and other mental health professionals that I at least am ASD & probably ADHD. The further investigation is  to conclude whether it is just that, or if they have to add any more acronyms to my diagnosis. 😔 I realise this isn't the place to be sharing this, but hopefully it explains somewhat why I'm a bit 'odd' or 'weird'. I literally do not see the world as others do. I apologise for any offence I may cause because of this. 

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  • DoctorRetro changed the title to The Doctor's travels through time - Clutching at straws
4 minutes ago, TheDoctor said:

That's a decent shout re the lift pump. I have one I was going to add, but wasn't sure if it was worth doing. 

 

Metro has gone in today to get the clutch done. I had to drop it off in a lovely* area near Barking and get the train home. I fear I might never see it again. But at least it will cost a third of what a local garage quoted. 

 

As for 'jokes' and 'banter', I am autistic, so I take most things literally and get upset by a lot of comments. I do realise that sometimes people aren't being serious, but then how do you tell? I'm fed up with having to second guess the world, I wish everyone would just say what they mean. 

I understand that this forum is probably the wrong place for me because if this, hence why I'll be limiting my activity here, for my own sanity. 

 

On a related note, I've been referred by my doctor for further investigation / testing so I can have an official diagnosis - but it's quite clear from my discussions with the doctor and other mental health professionals that I at least am ASD & probably ADHD. The further investigation is  to conclude whether it is just that, or if they have to add any more acronyms to my diagnosis. 😔 I realise this isn't the place to be sharing this, but hopefully it explains somewhat why I'm a bit 'odd' or 'weird'. I literally do not see the world as others do. I apologise for any offence I may cause because of this. 

You ain't odd or weird, because unsurprisingly given our love of Chod, everyone on this site is odd and/or weird compared to the General Public.

Best of luck with your health.

It will be a shame if you have to limit your time here, but perfectly understandable.

 

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@TheDoctor firstly, I for one am glad you are sharing this here. There are more of us here who have our own mental health history, and I appreciate when it is talked about, or normalised. I know talking about ones own mental health is not always the best thing in terms of living with ongoing issues, but when it is then please, bring it on! It helps others feel less weird about their mental health, one less anxiety to have to deal with.

The old cliche: it's not so embarrassing to talk about a sprained wrist, an old broken bone, arthritis, but when it comes to mental health there is still shame to be felt. Same with prostate illness, or cervical illness for that matter.

This place has differences of opinion, differences of sense of humour, but that's ok, we get on with it. The important thing is that there's a whole lot of decent people willing to help other people out.

It's up to you where you feel comfortable socialising but your posts are welcome here and enjoyed, people here value your input and miss you when you are quiet.

For when you feel up to it I look forward to hearing from you again. Good luck with getting a appropriate diagnosis, stay safe and as well as can be.

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Hope all is ok TheDoctor, throw away comments are way easier to post than genuine heartfelt experience, (and maybe for some of us this is just a way of dealing with the absurd or bizarre situations that we all experience but don't fully understand) so please stay here and keep posting! Just wanted to say that I have learned a massive amount about mental health and SEN/Special Educational Needs type stuff from some of the threads here, because fellow shitters braver than me were willing to share. It's been of enormous benefit  to me in my work and personal life, so please, if you feel it's the right thing for you to do we all benefit from experiences being shared. Well, at least those of us who spend a fair amount of time and energy trying to understand the world a bit better do!

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3 hours ago, TheDoctor said:

As for 'jokes' and 'banter', I am autistic, so I take most things literally and get upset by a lot of comments. I do realise that sometimes people aren't being serious, but then how do you tell? I'm fed up with having to second guess the world, I wish everyone would just say what they mean.

It's difficult.  Really difficult.  But I'm not sure that it's "Saying what they mean".  After all...

dying for a shit - Meme Guy

...both parties said what they mean and mean what they said.  There was still a misunderstanding.

We are, strangely, enjoying the challenge that my 8 year old son presents us with.  He is clearly on the spectrum, and this manifests itself in seemingly extreme intellect and a difficulty in displaying any kind of emotion.  Our approach is thus:  the world will not change for him, he must change for it.  

Social places are quite difficult for those with ASD - and I guess, having thought about it for the first time, a car forum is no different.  In fact, for many, it's become the ONLY social outlet of 2020.  

If people are teasing you, try to take that with the affection that it is undoubtedly given with.  Personally, I'd worry when people AREN'T engaging with you.

Good luck with the diagnosis, but I've said this before and will say it again.  Then what?  You have a label.  Gr29.  Then what?  The world is still round and full of cunts.  The majority of folk are decent human beings.  The challenge is, and always will be, for you to negotiate your way through it.

Good luck man.

 

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19 minutes ago, BorniteIdentity said:

 

Our approach is thus:  the world will not change for him, he must change for it.  

 

Which is called 'masking' and is very detrimental to an autistic person. And is a very ableist viewpoint, sorry to be blunt. 

I've spent the last 40 years 'trying to change for the world' and all it has brought me is anxiety, depression, pain and still no real friends or happiness. I'm done trying to change for the world, but I don't expect the world to change for me either. I (and other autistic persons) just need to learn to live alongside the rest of the world and try not to let it get us down when ignorant people don't understand. And learn to separate ourselves from those who are intolerant of our differences. 

 

Seriously 'he must change'?!!? 

 

Piss off with this bullshit! I'm done with it. Do you realise how that sounds? I'm so angry right now. Don't fucking post on my thread again. 

 

 

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Sorry that you don't agree with what I've written.  Perhaps I should have replaced 'change' with the word 'adapt'.  We all have our own approaches, methods and systems - and all I can tell you is that my lad is thriving since we made that change.  As is so often written here, YMMV.

I'll gladly accept your offer to "piss off" and not post again.  Whilst you have my every sympathy, it's actually really difficult to watch you self destructing.  

I've actually reported my own post to moderators, because I'm genuinely and properly worried for your wellbeing.  More than I have ever been for anyone in a long time.  I hope you get the help you need and deserve, and that you accept it.

Good luck, Alan.  I hope one day you'll realise I'm not the bad guy.

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I'd ask a trusted member to give any replies you may have doubts over a once over.

Bornite is a good case of trying to help being taken a different way.

Of course people don't need to change as such but need to find a way that works, we all need to find a way that works.

This forum overall I believe is good for you. If we can all try to see what we post with the way you will see it then that may help.

We all wish you the best.

 

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What they said ^ 

I've got my own demons to deal with but somewhere that most folk seem to have a similar outlook on life and old crap definitely helps.

My dry sense of humour may not, if anyone does offend me (and you certainly haven't) I usually ignore them. 

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I don't believe there are any bad guys here but here's a link to the NHS help for parents.

I'm not trying to weigh in here, but I think there is a body support, help and advice with an evidence base available from the NHS https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/autism/autism-and-everyday-life/help-for-families/

This is in response to @BorniteIdentity if you've not already seen anything the NHS has to offer its a start. Maybe you have already been through this kind of stuff.

Or anyone else for which this is relevant.

I hope you you don't mind me posting this here @TheDoctor

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Piss off with this bullshit! I'm done with it. Do you realise how that sounds? I'm so angry right now. Don't fucking post on my thread again. 
 
 


I must say I am as angry as The Doctor. One of the worst things that was said to me whilst I was going through a breakdown, and was in a locked ward of a mental hospital, was by my own father who told me to pull myself together theres nothing wrong with you. I have no doubt now it was a comment made in the best intentions by my Father, but hit a raw nerve with me while I was very ill.

Anyway thankfully I am much better now than I was then, although my issues will never go away. I do wish The Doctor well, and hope he finds some sort of peace for himself.

Sent from my SM-T585 using Tapatalk

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Life is a massive minefield of confusion and shitness for all of us at times, which is why so many of us will at some point suffer poor mental health. I can only sympathise with how much more complicated it must be to navigate with Aspergers/ADHD. 

For what it’s worth I’ve enjoyed this thread, and the shear amount of effort and energy you’ve ploughed into the revolving circus of shite cars. Plus you’ve showed me the genuine improvement  that some cheap black spray paint can make to tired plastics. 

I hope the experts can provide you with some help to get back to feeling better soon. 

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The world can change for those who are autistic, and should, even though it can be bloody difficult to do.  I've met a few autistic people over the years and every time the only problems we've had have come from communication and every time it's been solved by us both taking the time to try and understand one another.  It's like learning a different language.  You both know what you want to say to one another, you just don't always know how to say it and it's frustrating from both sides.  But, learn the lingo and suddenly it's a LOT easier.

All I can ask of @TheDoctor is that he's patient with those of us who understand and are trying to communicate in his language.  Because you're pretty fluent in 'normal' it can be easy to forget how much effort you're actually putting in to make our lives easier.  He's asked us to be less jokey and make less comments that seem to undermine his confidence, so that's what we do.  There's no point hurting someone on here for our own jollyment, we're all better than that.

Keep doing what you're doing, Doc, it makes you happy and entertains us and you shouldn't underestimate your ability to get shit done.  If you need space, then have that too.  Whatever you need to see you through where you are really.

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2 minutes ago, vulgalour said:

The world can change for those who are autistic, and should, even though it can be bloody difficult to do.  I've met a few autistic people over the years and every time the only problems we've had have come from communication and every time it's been solved by us both taking the time to try and understand one another.  It's like learning a different language.  You both know what you want to say to one another, you just don't always know how to say it and it's frustrating from both sides.  But, learn the lingo and suddenly it's a LOT easier.

All I can ask of @TheDoctor is that he's patient with those of us who understand and are trying to communicate in his language.  Because you're pretty fluent in 'normal' it can be easy to forget how much effort you're actually putting in to make our lives easier.  He's asked us to be less jokey and make less comments that seem to undermine his confidence, so that's what we do.  There's no point hurting someone on here for our own jollyment, we're all better than that.

Keep doing what you're doing, Doc, it makes you happy and entertains us and you shouldn't underestimate your ability to get shit done.  If you need space, then have that too.  Whatever you need to see you through where you are really.

Whs ^

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Solidarity @TheDoctor, I was diagnosed ASD a few years ago. I still don't understand a lot of jokes when first told  and I feel like I'm playing at being a social person. 

I would like to go through the Fenlander's poor running with you as I have played with crap old diesels for a long time. Have you tried a different filter?

 

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