Newbie owns a car.It's silver

[Kowalski]

Hello I'm Kowalski. I hail from Surrey but chased the Dragon and ended up in the West Midlands as that's where she and her family are from...

I have owned several cars, my favourites of which were a Citroen ZX and a Renault 25. Would love another of either now.  I do miss that 25...

I currently own some car. White goods. A 2009 Focus. It's neither new nor old nor interesting in anyway so I'll say no more about it. I hope to buy something older this year, something I can tinker with and talk about maybe...

So, some questions. What is Autoshite? A type of car or just a state of mind? Is there some criteria for a shite car? What's the gossip? Who is the know it all? Who.is the crazy that I shouldn't make eye contact with? I like your community and hope to become part of it.

[Pieman]

Welcome, fellow West Midlander and fellow Focus owner.  Please pull up a torn armchair and choose the least stained mug for your tea.

[HMC]

Welcome Kowalski. The username is familiar- is it a film character?

Autoshite is in the eye of the beholder; it is what you think it is. 

[eddyramrod]

22 hours ago, Kowalski said:

Who.is the crazy that I shouldn't make eye contact with?

Oh that's easy: Hairnet.  Don't worry, you won't be able to understand most of what he writes anyway.

As for the rest.. I think it's mostly a state of mind.  You will meet all sorts here, I mean just look at my fleet as an example!  I consider myself a recyclist, in that I like having old stuff that other people don't really want.  I have two cars bought through this very forum, both of which are currently up for Roffle (when you've been here a while you'll understand about those) and in between I ride a bike that I found in an alley and claimed.  The general idea seems to be that if the public don't want it, we probably do.

Can you trust my assessment?  Well I've been here nearly ten years, and messing with old cars a LOT longer, so you judge...

 

ETA: Kowalski was Barry Newman's character in Vanishing Point.

[loserone]

[DoctorRetro]

Welcome 

[garethj]

Welcome, newbie.  Read the forums and join in.

If the content involves old cars, unloved cars or cars that are so forgotten about that normal people don’t even put them into a category, you’re in.

Make it funny too, please?

[Stinkwheel]

Welcome Kowalski. The username is familiar- is it a film character?
Autoshite is in the eye of the beholder; it is what you think it is. 

Kowalski was the driver of the white Dodge Challenger in Vanishing Point.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[stuboy]

[Skizzer]

For some it’s a way of life, for some just a bad habit. A few have elevated autoshite to performance art and there’s one or two who I think are just doing it for a bet, or maybe a condition of their parole.

Autoshite is cars (and vans or trucks, even bikes if you’re strange) that people down the pub or Jeremy Clarkson fans say is crap.

A shite car was probably never cool, but if it once was then either it’s gone utterly out of fashion or it’s in such an unappealing spec or condition that someone says that the council must come and take it away, and everyone on Mumsnet agrees.

Rarity due to apathy is also a hallmark of shite.

None of these are rules, just my observations after ten years here. We don’t really like rules, except maybe ‘don’t be a git’. Generosity, integrity, real knowledge, wit and swearing are valued and widespread; arrogance, belligerence and dishonesty are not.

Welcome along, anyhow.  
 

None of us is really comfortable with eye contact, by the way.

 

[320touring]

Welcome!

 

Confused the hell out of me, as " chasing the dragon" means smoking heroin up here.

 

That is a less dangerous and cheaper habit than autoshiting - you have been warned:)

[HMC]

Didn’t @Junkman develop a sort of pictogram relating modern, classic and shite? 

[FakeConcern]

Hi, why don't you post some pics of your Focus as that sounds plenty shite enough to me?

 

 

[inconsistant]

Welcome. 

My understanding is that Autoshite is the bit between depreciation and appreciation.

[Skizzer]

8 minutes ago, HMC said:

Didn’t @Junkman develop a sort of pictogram relating modern, classic and shite? 

I know I did at one point a long time ago, I think while drinking, but I’ve got no idea where it is.

I’ll have a look tomorrow. It’s bedtime now cos I’ve got to be up early to get the Aerodeck MOTd.

Which reminds me - pop-up lights or headlamp wipers are a surefire way to win friends on here.

[Snipes]

Autoshite is knowing what an Aerodeck even is.

[DSdriver]

Hi and welcome to Autoshite

there are two options on 'cars to tinker with' namely those that never leave your driveway and those that can be daily drivers. There are probably inbetweenies that are the best of the former and the worst of the latter. 

Cars of the former type that you can spend hours on without actually going anywhere apart from collecting another the same to cannibalise for bits:

Citroen XM (cheap), Triple carb Alfa Montreal (expensive)

Basic daily drivers: Austin A35 or Hillman Minx (really basic), anything made by British Leyland (BL) (you might not need a car rug and overcoat when driving) Volvo 940 (just leave your brains in a bucket when you take it for a spin), get another Renault 25 or a 20 or a 19 or an 18 or a 17 etc.

I kook forward to reading your choices and adventures

[Skizzer]

16 minutes ago, HMC said:

Didn’t @Junkman develop a sort of pictogram relating modern, classic and shite? 

Here you go, I found it.

I think Junkman did something similar (later, I might add) but his had a big red line at 1986.

It’s just one perspective, it’s all up for discussion — and one we have fairly regularly, e.g. here: 

 

[Skizzer]

15 minutes ago, inconsistant said:

Welcome. 

My understanding is that Autoshite is the bit between depreciation and appreciation.

I love that.  I want a t-shirt.

[barmatt]

Welcome along.

As previously said, Autoshite is what ever you perceive it to be, there's no hard and fast rules round here of any sort really. Just enjoy what you drive and if you don't like what someone else has, well just be thankful it's not yours.

Obviously things can go very wrong if you start buying raffle tickets when you're drunk and end up winning a Perodua Nipper that's 250 miles away and you don't fit in the drivers seat. 

 

Oh and Focus'es / Foci are rapidly becoming shite, I had one for a bit last year and it was ultimatley forgetable but excellent at being "an car".

[barmatt]

20 minutes ago, inconsistant said:

Welcome. 

My understanding is that Autoshite is the bit between depreciation and appreciation.

 

4 minutes ago, Skizzer said:

I love that.  I want a t-shirt.

In the form of a Venn diagram ftw.

[Kowalski]

49 minutes ago, FakeConcern said:

Hi, why don't you post some pics of your Focus as that sounds plenty shite enough to me?

 

 

You want to see pictures of a silver 2009 Focus? Fuck me, you need to get out more!

[Roobarb]

Which of these supermarkets near me do you own?

let me guess, the one with the silver Ford Focus outside...

Welcome anyways...

[Justin Case]

2 hours ago, Kowalski said:

 Autoshite? A type of car or just a state of mind? Is there some criteria for a shite car?

Autoshite is a state of mind which is brought about by a type of car, and frequently the state of the car . The criteria for a shite car are fairly loose, as are most of the key parts of such a car. 

[beko1987]

It's driving to work in my 1997 citroen zx every day and forgetting its an older car 

[Wingz123]

We like manual simple mechanics over electrical interference!

I have a 2010 focus that currently  needs a fuel pump.....is a 1.6tdci ecomotive....I get the not very interesting part LOL

[Crackers]

Hello from another Focus owner. 

A car so boring I once forgot where I'd parked while I was standing in front of it. 

[face]

Only rule is users have to own a pair of white moccasins.

Photo proof required and this absolutely must include scattered vehicle documents and history in the shot.

[brownnova]

To me the Autoshite ethos seems two-fold: keeping interesting older vehicles on the road, and helping/encouraging others to do the same. 

 Why have that shiny PCP’d Fiat 500 on the drive when for less than a bag of sand you could have a crusty Jag or some such.

On AS There’s the bangernomics side of things (keeping older white goods type cars on the road well beyond it being socially acceptable) and the love of the quirky and unloved. Many people run a modern and an unloved gem or 7, many people just run the bangernomics type vehicles. Some heroes daily drive the weird and wonderful everyday.

 For me your Focus holds no particular interest. But the beauty of AS is that others will do. I mean FakeConcern wants to see pictures!!

But I will warn you... when I signed up to AS I had one car, it was  nearly new and fairly dull (a BMW 1-Series) I now own 6 cars, the newest of which is 22 years old and I recently bought a non-running Yugo just because... why not.

 Best thing to do is get stuck in. It’s a fantastic community. Join in, go to events meet people. I’ve yet to meet a Shiter who’s a complete knob. And some Shiters I’m now lucky enough to count as friends.

 Anyway it’s 1.48am, I can’t sleep and I’m getting soppy now... I’d best go off and bid blind on some festering heap on eBay... 

[andy18s]

7 hours ago, Skizzer said:

 

Which reminds me - pop-up lights or headlamp wipers are a surefire way to win friends on here.