AXrescuer Posted August 6, 2009 Share Posted August 6, 2009 Blimey! http://www.volkszone.com/VZi/showthread.php?t=577806 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Station Posted August 6, 2009 Share Posted August 6, 2009 Something's not right, it simply wouldn't run 'fine' missing a piston? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 6, 2009 Share Posted August 6, 2009 I find that hard to believe-but stranger things etc etc Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dead_E23 Posted August 6, 2009 Share Posted August 6, 2009 Hm - itchy beard! I think a fault like that would probably not go unobserved - the sound of the flailing con rod beating nine bells out of the bore might provide a clue that something wasn't quite right. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trigger Posted August 6, 2009 Share Posted August 6, 2009 Hm - itchy beard! I think a fault like that would probably not go unobserved - the sound of the flailing con rod beating nine bells out of the bore might provide a clue that something wasn't quite right.I agree, Chinny chin chin i say! Wonder if the garage is pulling a fast one? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barry Cade Posted August 6, 2009 Share Posted August 6, 2009 No way on earth did that run perfectly... I'd expect a slight rattle at least!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dead_E23 Posted August 6, 2009 Share Posted August 6, 2009 I would expect to notice a slight ear-splitting cacophany of sound that finishes abruptly after about 30 seconds. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Minimad5 Posted August 6, 2009 Share Posted August 6, 2009 Hm - itchy beard! I think a fault like that would probably not go unobserved - the sound of the flailing con rod beating nine bells out of the bore might provide a clue that something wasn't quite right.I agree, Chinny chin chin i say! Wonder if the garage is pulling a fast one?Yeah i think that too (No not chinny chin chin) .. but the garage is pulling a fast oneSurely there would of been alot of hoise because if the gudgon pin slapping around and hitting the bore wall.I mean when the shells go you can hear the bottom end clunk ... so why wouldnt you hear the Rod smash against the wall ??Thats really confused me Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dead_E23 Posted August 6, 2009 Share Posted August 6, 2009 I doubt it's the garage - I rather suspect that somebody had a spare block sitting around in bits and decided to test the combined mechanical wit of the Volks forum by plonking it together in an amusing manner. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brammy777 Posted August 6, 2009 Share Posted August 6, 2009 im sure this cant be real, surely a diagnostics test on the car during a service by a ford dealer would have said something about that piston?Looks to me like a modern day incarnation of a candid on camera gag, when they rolled a car into a garage slyly, and made the mechanic look at it, who discovered the lack of engine...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Volksy Posted August 7, 2009 Share Posted August 7, 2009 Complete Bollocks if you ask me, sorry but 80mph in a car missing a piston, but with a conrod slapping about.... that'll be 4,000rpm... no sign of damage to the bore... yer right.So that conrod has at some point been going up and down, unsecured, 66 times a second.Balls i say. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barry Cade Posted August 7, 2009 Share Posted August 7, 2009 Yup,I'll have to remember and take a pic of a con rod from a new shape Primera we have at work.. after the crank cap let go, to show what damage is really done with bits flapping around... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Conrad D. Conelrad Posted August 7, 2009 Share Posted August 7, 2009 I vote BS as well. Even if the engines are completely machine assembled, I can't believe they wouldn't do so much as a compression test before dropping one in a car. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Barry Cade Posted August 7, 2009 Share Posted August 7, 2009 I think the engine management light would have came on! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Waderider Posted August 7, 2009 Share Posted August 7, 2009 Bore would be fecked in seconds.Fuel consumption would be hit by wastage from the injector, extra internal friction in the engine from the flailing con rod, plus the other three cylinders working harder.Lambda sensor function would be fecked, if not from oil getting past the exhaust valves then from exhaust back pressure sucking through whatever atmosphere exists in the sump. Catalyst death too. And what would the anti knock sensor make of it? EMS light would be on immediately,Oil would either be diluted from petrol or you'd have crankcase ignition, can't decide which.Net effect, 5mpg, 5 horse power, for five minutes, before needing a new engine. And oil out the exhaust.Someone is having a laugh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Volksy Posted August 7, 2009 Share Posted August 7, 2009 Bore would be fecked in seconds.Fuel consumption would be hit by wastage from the injector, extra internal friction in the engine from the flailing con rod, plus the other three cylinders working harder.Lambda sensor function would be fecked, if not from oil getting past the exhaust valves then from exhaust back pressure sucking through whatever atmosphere exists in the sump. Catalyst death too. And what would the anti knock sensor make of it? EMS light would be on immediately,Oil would either be diluted from petrol or you'd have crankcase ignition, can't decide which.Net effect, 5mpg, 5 horse power, for five minutes, before needing a new engine. And oil out the exhaust.Someone is having a laugh.Yup all of the above.I'm a subscriber to VZi, and have voiced as much, still get muppets trying to argue against though.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Father Ted Posted August 7, 2009 Share Posted August 7, 2009 the 1970's Lancashire playground terminology for this story would beBELM Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ratdat Posted August 7, 2009 Share Posted August 7, 2009 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VWPowered Posted August 7, 2009 Share Posted August 7, 2009 it fake no score marks now i brought a ropey T25 once, drove really really bad but did fire, towed it home, dropped the engine and box, removed the head to find it was cracked between the valves and a piston missing.. the cylinder linings were scored to buggery (so bad it went though the lining).... that was the end of that one Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Albert Ross Posted August 7, 2009 Share Posted August 7, 2009 Many moons ago, I worked in an engine reconditioners.....We had a customer drive from Austria, on holiday, and as he exited the ferry and found his way onto the M25, he had a rattle, which lasted until approx J26 of the M1. We worked in Ilkeston, and we got the job of sorting it.....Mercedes 260E 5 cylinder. It required a complete engine, and the centre piston had broken up, and the rod had slapped about at 70 mph for a couple of hours or so. It was royally fucked. The con rod, which had holed the cylinder liner, was twisted and bent double, was used as a paperweight it the bosses office, and as an example of how to kill an engine.Another example......I have seen the original engine in bits on this one. A bloke was off road in a V8 Land Rover, and was stuck on a side slope, whereupon he got oil starvation, (V8s are a twat to prime up anyway) and knocked a rod, before he had time to react, he had gunned it to try to get out of the position he was in, and it threw the rod.....well, snapped it in fact, as it had seized to the crank.......knocking a piece of the block out......They had it towed to a flat area, drained the oil, dropped the sump, removed pits of debris, left the piston in place, but it was mullered so it wouldnt drop out into the sump, siliconed the block piece back it (it had stayed attached to the steel sump) The con rod having seized to the crank meant it would hold oil pressure, so it was trimmed with a grinder (these people go well equipped with gennies and tools) and the whole thing put together and refilled with oil. The plug lead was removed, and he drove home on 7, and replaced his engine with a spare.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Owain-328i Posted August 7, 2009 Share Posted August 7, 2009 Many moons ago, I worked in an engine reconditioners.....We had a customer drive from Austria, on holiday, and as he exited the ferry and found his way onto the M25, he had a rattle, which lasted until approx J26 of the M1. We worked in Ilkeston, and we got the job of sorting it.....Mercedes 260E 5 cylinder. It required a complete engine, and the centre piston had broken up, and the rod had slapped about at 70 mph for a couple of hours or so. It was royally fucked. The con rod, which had holed the cylinder liner, was twisted and bent double, was used as a paperweight it the bosses office, and as an example of how to kill an engine.Another example......I have seen the original engine in bits on this one. A bloke was off road in a V8 Land Rover, and was stuck on a side slope, whereupon he got oil starvation, (V8s are a twat to prime up anyway) and knocked a rod, before he had time to react, he had gunned it to try to get out of the position he was in, and it threw the rod.....well, snapped it in fact, as it had seized to the crank.......knocking a piece of the block out......They had it towed to a flat area, drained the oil, dropped the sump, removed pits of debris, left the piston in place, but it was mullered so it wouldnt drop out into the sump, siliconed the block piece back it (it had stayed attached to the steel sump) The con rod having seized to the crank meant it would hold oil pressure, so it was trimmed with a grinder (these people go well equipped with gennies and tools) and the whole thing put together and refilled with oil. The plug lead was removed, and he drove home on 7, and replaced his engine with a spare....What a hero Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
retrogeezer Posted August 7, 2009 Share Posted August 7, 2009 VZi link not working? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pillock Posted August 7, 2009 Share Posted August 7, 2009 No, it seems to have been removed. I read the thread on VZi, Paul Knight is one of the big names in VWs but also prime suspect for 'having a bit of a laugh' so it's entirely possible it's just a long-winded gag to see how many people fall for it. I once tried to drive a Mk3 Polo with three pistons. It started out with four, but the timing was out. As I dropped a cog to get it up a hill (for it was struggling on the flat, let along an incline) it just let go. I tried starting it again but there was just no compression, it was like I was just spinning the starter motor over with nothing attached which TBH was a bit weird - the other three pistons were fine. Took the head off and found this. Not nearly as neatly done as that focus Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AXrescuer Posted August 7, 2009 Author Share Posted August 7, 2009 the 1970's Lancashire playground terminology for this story would beBELM Fuck me, I haven't heard that word in ages! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Timewaster Posted August 7, 2009 Share Posted August 7, 2009 There was a feature in MCN a few years ago of "classic bodges".One was a tin can used as a piston (Hmmmmm) but this story made me think of the 3 cyl Suzuki GT750 (kettle) bought by a guy who took the head off to investigate the lack of go to find the notorious middle piston missing and a burnt tennis ball over the end of the rod!How true it was I don't know, made me chuckle though! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bigstraight6 Posted August 7, 2009 Share Posted August 7, 2009 Ah, this thread has reminded me of a story that once filtered around the motor trade in Plymouth many years ago about a chap who bought an MG midget and soon had engine problems and it was discovered to have a wooden piston Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pillock Posted August 8, 2009 Share Posted August 8, 2009 Apparently there were a could of iffy comments in the thread, and it's now going through Ford as an out of warranty claim so the thread was disappeared so as not to harm the claim...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
STUNO Posted August 8, 2009 Share Posted August 8, 2009 Ah, this thread has reminded me of a story that once filtered around the motor trade in Plymouth many years ago about a chap who bought an MG midget and soon had engine problems and it was discovered to have a wooden piston WRONG..thirty-five years ago it was a Mercedes and in Africa somewhere.I remember the story well Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dead_E23 Posted August 8, 2009 Share Posted August 8, 2009 going through Ford as an out of warranty claim so the thread was disappeared so as not to harm the claim......'Chinny reckon' to that too More likely it was eating too much bandwidth. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pogweasel Posted August 8, 2009 Share Posted August 8, 2009 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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