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Shitting in the shallow end.


Jim Bell

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1 minute ago, UltraWomble said:

Jim - Im sorry but a combo of the face mask and the shirt make you look like you are on the run from the hospital...4F6FDCD100000578-6101105-image-m-75_1535374137078.thumb.jpg.67636b0f2bf18c7cfc341ce5edebce87.jpg

We need to be sure you are wearing pants

You'll never catch me mate. You're a big lad, but you're out of shape. I do this for a living. 

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14 minutes ago, Jim Bell said:

Darren. 

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"Yeah there is sumfink bovvering me as it goes, fanks for askin. You know all this Brexit that we all seem to have forgotten abaaaaht since society itself set ablaze? 

Well, now that we've taken aaaahr cantry back and got all the Brexits dahn, will we be able to stop, CERTAIN ANIMALS from entering the country?

Like specifically Maribu Storks. Because fahk me they give me the small balls. Make my pickled onions creep right back ahp into the jar if you know what I mean. They fahkin look like an 80 year old man has put a Pelicans skull on his head as a joke. I can't as much as kiss the wife while I'm thinking about the dirty fahkas. "

 

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It's wot my graaaaanayyyd died for in the wawwer. Send then back to wot evva obscure archipelago they come from. "

Fucking tremendous. "they give me the small balls" ???????

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Brett. 

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"Now Bowie is gone, I feel cast adrift. Zavid was my anchor and my hope. Someone in the fan club said that theres a bird called a Dracula Parrott that can be taught to mimic sounds and noises. I imported one from French Indo-China hoping to teach it to sing David Bowie songs but it just perches on the mantle staring at me. Like it's waiting for me to close my eyes so that it can accost me and drink my precious blood. I'm right on edge. It cost two thousand pounds and if I'm honest, I wish I'd never bought it."

 

 

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"It's eyes are so black and dead and it squawks sound like knives down a blackboard. I don't feel comfortable bringing women home."

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  • Jim Bell changed the title to Shitting in the shallow end.

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