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Shitting in the shallow end. *Bile Hatred* pseudo collection.


Jim Bell

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1 hour ago, paulplom said:

Did the disklok clean up okay? It was my intention to steel wool it and spray it a luminous colour with laquer.  It only has one key. Whatever you do, don't loose it 🤣

I got as far as cleaning it pretty well, and that seems good enough for me man. It's deterring thrives as we speak. Cheers fella. 

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  • Jim Bell changed the title to Shitting in the shallow end.

The Lexus is off away now and the E240 is back to daily duties. The drivers window got a bit SELF AWARE and started going up and down of its own accord like JOAN COLLINS KNICKERS after a period of prolonged rain so I pulled the fuse to keep it in the up position. The drivers door speaker and driver's door mirror have also gone off so I'm guessing there's an issue with the door loom. Either that or they all work off the same fuse. 

 

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Other than that, it's just been conveying me about the land smoothly and comfortably. 

Here's some pics from the Northumberland countryside. 

 

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On 10/01/2022 at 10:54, Jim Bell said:

 

I'm kind of torn between the two. I can only keep one. 

Ones definitely "cooler" and the other is probably "better". 

Decisions, decisions. 

I’m in the same boat with my W210 and my Volvo 940… I’m delaying that decision as long as possible! 

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  • Jim Bell changed the title to Shitting in the shallow end....AND. ITS. LIVE!!

Boring update.

I've had the W210 now for eleven months, which I think is a personal best. It's been the best car I've ever had so I would be a fool to go and purchase anything else. 

Good morning. Please allow me to introduce myself. I am a fool. 

 

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It all started way back the day before last friday. I was using facebook for its intended purpose, reading up on obscure motor vehicles in a closed group for owners of an specific obscure motor vehicle that nobody likes and that I did not own. 

There was one for sale. It was sort of green. The advert was one year old. I thought to myself "well that's definitely sold. You can't even buy a kilogramme of cheese with the money he's asking for that obscure car that nobody likes. I'd better check though. Just to make sure."

So I drafted a polite and friendly message to the seller in the time honoured fashion:

IS THIS STILL AVAILABLE? (send)

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I received a reply while idly picking my nose, which is one of those details that I probably shouldn't have mentioned. 

"Good evening. Yes the car is still available. There has been no interest because nobody likes them."

This was very unexpected. 

After wiping my current haul of nose gold onto a piece of kitchen roll, which was then thrown into the bin which was almost sixteen feet away ON MY FIRST TRY, I sent a prompt and polite response. 

"Well fuck everyone else in the world that isn't me and you mate, I think it's lovely. If you can get an MOT on it, I'd be happy to buy it."

And so to today. 

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Had a terrible dream where the pope was watching me have a poo. Can only get better from here. 

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The traditions will be coming thick and fast because the day is barreling by swiftly. 

Traditional collection thread tradition the first:

An photograph of a treasured family pet. 

The morning dog walk. Poo count up from none to one. 

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With the cresting of the first brown of the day, we are officially underway. 

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Traditional collection thread tradition the second:

The unveiling of the collectioneering fuel. Today's collectioneering fuel will be a hearty Gregg's breakfast. 

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So sayeth he in the book of St. Gregory: "May we be blessed by the bounties of the swine, of the mill and of the dark bitter grind and be we fortified by the stodge for the tribulations ahead"

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At this point we take our first Toilet interlude. 

Toilet interludes may take place unexpectedly but in themselves, are also a traditional tradition of the collection thread. 

I'm in Gateshead and I think there's a communal public convenience just up by Tesco's which isn't creepy. I'll see if it's still open. 

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Thank god it's open. Don't even have to pay, fantastic!

 

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And it's empty. Great!

P.C. up one to two. 

 

 

Refreshed, we move on. 

 

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Public transportation device the second. 

Lareg tren. 

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Full of bank holiday types. The kind going 67 miles to eat an ice cream next to a swan. I bet not one of this lot are off to Chesterfield to buy a car they've never seen, from stranger called Kev. 

Bunch of amateurs. 

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