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The grumpy thread


outlaw118

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1 hour ago, sierraman said:

Wouldn’t you just be able to compress the spring in situ with one of those sort of one sided compressors that have a cup either end? Avoid touching the lower arm bolt?

Not enough room . There is a sykes kit available that compresses through the centre but it cost about twice what any mk1 focus is worth

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13 minutes ago, twosmoke300 said:

Not enough room . There is a sykes kit available that compresses through the centre but it cost about twice what any mk1 focus is worth

One of these types? 

Which way do you normally do them avoiding the bottom arm bolt? Undo the drop link and the shocker bottom bolt then pull it down? 

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BMW is to be repaired, finally. But again as usual its gonna cost which I could really do without. I'm gonna sell it/roffle it when its done because I need to raise money very quickly for the Visa ...again... 

Also, just to be clear on the car wash front; I either use IMO as I used to work for this outfit or other car washes, I am aware that it is often a joint business. Maybe I should start re-washing my own cars again and stop being lazy and unfit.

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Even though I live in a (extremely grotty) flat I have a hose pipe. It cost me £7 from Amazon (and yes, I do hate them but cheap) with a sprayer thing on the end. It is 75 feet long extendable jobby and I bought a tap connector for another £5 or so. I connect it and wash the car whenever I want then abandon it in the garden(Ha! Garden... that's a laugh). I stopped using the Polish guys when I realised how little the poor sod was getting while freezing his tts off outside wet in January. I gave them such bg tips ( a tenner a time on top) that it was costing me a fortune to have a cheap car wash! Also, the Bentley lost a vital and expensive piece of trim when one of the guys was a bit over-zealous with the pressure washer.

Buying the hose etc cost less than one wash and now it costs me pennies. As a bonus, I get to do it properly (or, if i miss bits, there's no on to whinge at except me) and I can do it whenever I like. Plus, while I whinge like the vitch I am about doing it, I think I secretly LIKE washing my own car. Shame I don't feel the same about hoovering the flat....

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I have loaned my rusty scruffy beat up 52 plate Yaris to a friend as her car is off the road. Sunday morning it was parked in town (Stonehaven) while she was at work 

Two hours later she returned to find someone had stolen one of the front wheels ( a rusty steel)

FFS

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1 hour ago, Saabnut said:

I have loaned my rusty scruffy beat up 52 plate Yaris to a friend as her car is off the road. Sunday morning it was parked in town (Stonehaven) while she was at work 

Two hours later she returned to find someone had stolen one of the front wheels ( a rusty steel)

FFS

Sorry for the laugh react, but I did indeed laugh.

I didn't think Stonehaven was that bad!

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Today has been rather hectic for the Fumbler Household. This morning, Grandmother Fumbler dislocated her replacement hip, fell on the ground and was wailing in agony. Paramedics arrived an hour after the 999 call and propped her up off the kitchen floor. They asked if she was physically fit, "oh yes yes" she said when she isn't. In fact, with every replacement she's had, she's run a cart and horse through the physio rulebook and ignored doctors' advice. Mother Fumbler tries to find all the prescriptions Grandmother has to explain all the pills she has. No, finds nothing and instead finds loose pills, empty packets and nothing else.
 She is in so much agony the paramedics have to pump her full of morphine so she's as high as a kite and cannot answer to anything. She's carted off to hospital. At 1:00, Mother Fumbler calls to ask if everything is well. The hospital says everything is fine for now but Grandmother is being trnasported through the building so no active status can be given. Fair enough, that's fine, so Kother Fumbler does a ring-around to explain the situation to all the family.
We call at 3:00 and get directly to Grandmother Fumbler. She's said she's properly dislocated her hip and is being transported to the operating table in the next 20 minutes. Bollocks, that means she will be immobile, using a Zimmer frame and everything for another month because she'll be at the same stage as she was when she had her hip done. Will she listen to excercise advice and what the doctors say this time around? Probably not!

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2 hours ago, Saabnut said:

I have loaned my rusty scruffy beat up 52 plate Yaris to a friend as her car is off the road. Sunday morning it was parked in town (Stonehaven) while she was at work 

Two hours later she returned to find someone had stolen one of the front wheels ( a rusty steel)

FFS

#STONEYLIFE

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2 hours ago, Pieman said:

Nearly everyone I know has had their vehicles nicked or damaged recently.  Are Greta's followers just randomly taking it out on vehicles to make themselves feel smug?

Are you just taking it out on her and her followers to make yourself look clever*?

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Seriously, fuck whoever plumbed this lot in, that cunt.

I've had to pull a wall load of badly fitted tiles down, re-plumb the sink, the lav and now the bath.

To cap it all off the new waste has a fancy metal plug that won't fit the fucking plughole.

 

Cunt cunt cuntity cunting cuntfucklet.

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Today has been rather hectic for the Fumbler Household. This morning, Grandmother Fumbler dislocated her replacement hip, fell on the ground and was wailing in agony. Paramedics arrived an hour after the 999 call and propped her up off the kitchen floor. They asked if she was physically fit, "oh yes yes" she said when she isn't. In fact, with every replacement she's had, she's run a cart and horse through the physio rulebook and ignored doctors' advice. Mother Fumbler tries to find all the prescriptions Grandmother has to explain all the pills she has. No, finds nothing and instead finds loose pills, empty packets and nothing else.
 She is in so much agony the paramedics have to pump her full of morphine so she's as high as a kite and cannot answer to anything. She's carted off to hospital. At 1:00, Mother Fumbler calls to ask if everything is well. The hospital says everything is fine for now but Grandmother is being trnasported through the building so no active status can be given. Fair enough, that's fine, so Kother Fumbler does a ring-around to explain the situation to all the family.
We call at 3:00 and get directly to Grandmother Fumbler. She's said she's properly dislocated her hip and is being transported to the operating table in the next 20 minutes. Bollocks, that means she will be immobile, using a Zimmer frame and everything for another month because she'll be at the same stage as she was when she had her hip done. Will she listen to excercise advice and what the doctors say this time around? Probably not!
We have moved a couple of older members of the family on to NOMAD packs for medication, more hassle for pharmacy to put together but very handy for times like this when medications need to be identified or you need to know if they are taking them.

Sent from my SM-A505FN using Tapatalk

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3 hours ago, MikeR said:

F in taxi cuts in and nearly takes a coat of paint with it .

Drivers points at mirror and suggests i am in the wrong ..

I point at my car cam and he fuks offf .

We should call it Mike's porn Cam.

As Mike gets to record a lot of Cunts.

Or does he? 

You post is useless without footage, so we can all say, "Nah, it was obvious that he was going to do that, and you need to chill" 

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22 minutes ago, beko1987 said:

I'm on holiday with my family... 

I'm 25 minutes away from swearing violently, and about an hour from bundling the kids in the car and driving home... And their not even being that bad! 

Take a 35 minute walk alone ? 

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2 hours ago, sierraman said:

I wish the wife would stop filling our Sky with Dave Gorman. He’s such a fucking crushing bore. 

I was at one of his gigs at Hull uni in about 1996. We'd sat at the front to do some heckling as usual and had some good banter with the support act. 

Gorman comes on and isn't particularly funny. He then starts telling a joke about blind people despite there being a blind lass sat on the table next to us right in front of him. 

My mate stops him and says, "Do you mind mate, theres a blind lass sat just there". 

Gorman takes offence to this and gives a shitty response. Paul just tells him to fuck off pointing out that he isn't funny. 

He then tries telling a few more jokes, each time thinking he's being clever by asking my mate if its okay to tell a joke about toasters in case there are any in the room etc but he's already lost the crowd who think he's a complete cunt and he eventually just calls the crowd shit and fucks off stage which is the only time he got an applause all evening. 

Sadly my mate Simon missed all the excitement as he'd stormed off in a huff earlier in the evening as we were taking the piss out of him for not knowing what cunnilingus was. Not really relevant but it still makes me laugh. 

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19 minutes ago, xtriple said:

About 4p.m. terrible stomach pains... you can guess the rest without graphic details. Now laying on the floor with a dog either side of me t try and keep warm all three of us under the duvet. I feel TERRIBLE!

Similar here - I didn’t get out of bed yesterday until time to watch dr who. No idea what it was, sweating and cold at the same time and slept for about twenty hours. Much better today.

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19 minutes ago, HillmanImp said:

I was at one of his gigs at Hull uni in about 1996. We'd sat at the front to do some heckling as usual and had some good banter with the support act. 

Gorman comes on and isn't particularly funny. He then starts telling a joke about blind people despite there being a blind lass sat on the table next to us right in front of him. 

My mate stops him and says, "Do you mind mate, theres a blind lass sat just there". 

Gorman takes offence to this and gives a shitty response. Paul just tells him to fuck off pointing out that he isn't funny. 

He then tries telling a few more jokes, each time thinking he's being clever by asking my mate if its okay to tell a joke about toasters in case there are any in the room etc but he's already lost the crowd who think he's a complete cunt and he eventually just calls the crowd shit and fucks off stage which is the only time he got an applause all evening. 

Sadly my mate Simon missed all the excitement as he'd stormed off in a huff earlier in the evening as we were taking the piss out of him for not knowing what cunnilingus was. Not really relevant but it still makes me laugh. 

Was he away licking his wounds ?

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