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The grumpy thread


outlaw118

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OK, so I (whisper it) spent out on a mk5 golf gti about a month back- £2k. One month of enthusiastic driving later and I’ve blown the turbo. I. Don’t think I’ve ever been in a place before where my car is too expensive to throw away at this point. What a bastard.

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20 hours ago, Stanky said:

Following a family bereavement, and couple of months of frankly intolerable stress at work, culminating in attacks of shakes, vomiting what I think might have been blood, and some extremely dark thoughts, today I cracked, left work early and went to an urgent appointment at my GP practice, where they signed me off for a month. Terms were used along the lines of 'nervous breakdown' which is pretty worrying in itself, and I've had to report this back to senior management at work, who were largely unaware this was going on.

I bit off more than I could chew, and have laboured to make things work largely singlehandedly, and now paid the price in my mental health.

I'm not quite sure where to go from here, I need the time to recover and feel a weight has been lifted from my shoulders, but am in limbo regarding pay for the time I will be off - strictly speaking it will only be SSP which doesn't even cover the rent let alone anything else. I'm putting this to one side for now, and have set myself a list of small jobs which I will tackle one per day to start to rebuild myself. While I've struggled with my mental health in the past it has categorically never been this bad.

I'm also trying not to consider how I go about returning to the office in 4 weeks time and having 'that meeting'. I will have to make my case that managing 3 teams, 50% of which are new staff who need training on top of trying to deliver 50+ projects is not tenable for the foreseeable future and that I need to have fewer areas of responsibility if we don't want this to happen again in 6 months.

For now, I am trying to focus on the positive. The GP was understanding, the triage team were efficient and I've now got breathing space. For anyone else feeling similar, don't let it get to this point.

I have no idea how long you have worked where you are but from the workload you are managing its probably a few years with a suitably senior title for the role.

If your current feelings about your job are dread and negativity you need an alternative, even if you dont go down the route of changing jobs, being prepared to do so will take a lot of pressure off for having to stick with something that has become deeply unpleasant.

 

Pick a few skills you use regularly, maybe even stuff you enjoy and search for jobs on indeed.com that need those skills.
If something catches your eye and its a recent job posting, pull together a two page CV and slap in an application.

I work as a contractor on fixed term contracts, at the end I have often negotiated more work or decided I can no longer tolerate working in that environment and find something else.
Having that light at the end of the tunnel allows me to cope with the stress on any given day and I wouldn't have it any other way.

But Fuck all that anyway!
Put a tarpaulin on the lawn and make a water slide for the kids, take some downtime and , flog some of the stuff in the loft for cash and declutter a bit, walk down to the river and throw bread at the ducks.

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21 hours ago, Stanky said:

For anyone else feeling similar, don't let it get to this point.

 

Indeed... while work is important, it's never worth dying for.

 

FWIW there are more of us who have been here than you would imagine - well done on taking this (big) first step. To a non-office dweller like me your work situation sounds horrendous - and I accept that may say more about me than anyone else - but hopefully this will be the first stage in leading you to a making a living in a way that's less damaging to you than your current occupation  and, hopefully, something you might actually enjoy. Good luck, chap.

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22 minutes ago, Rovorsche said:

...and make a water slide for the kids, take some downtime and , flog some of the stuff in the loft for cash and declutter a bit, walk down to the river and throw bread at the ducks.

 

Sage advice, except you should never give ducks bread. Seed, mealworms and grains are great - but no bread :)

 

EDIT: Hanging out in parks feeding ducks is a very therapeutic thing, which I can wholeheartedly recommend.

 

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2 hours ago, sierraman said:

Really don’t think you ought to be advising people how to buck the system. 

I don't think it's possible.  Which on the one hand is good that our civil service has thought about loopholes. Which is bad because who doesn't want Lord Sterling to be united with his wife.  

I don't think I was asking in a criminally intent way, not in an incite to commit an offence, more in a "let me understand the system" way. 

I have a dilemma when it comes to immigration. I see much of the criteria to be fundamentally a bit you know rascist. And yet I can that we need rules. And fair rules at that. 

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44 minutes ago, Kiltox said:

Now that’s what I call good old fashioned trivial crime - some little shit has nicked two of the valve caps from my BMW (they were shiny ones with the BMW logo on) 

 

Just 2. 

I would start suspecting someone with a bycyle. 

I had 2 anodised bullet shaped caps stolen a few years back. The other 2 went on my bike. They corroded and were a bigger to remove in the end. 

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Got a message the other day from a company I used to work for, asking if I'd be interested in being shortlisted for a job. I thought, what the hell, and went to the interview. 

Long story short, they rejected me because 1) I want too much money (I only wanted what I was on when I left) and 2) Because I'd have to work with someone who I'd previously had issues with (I raised a grievance over their bullying) and they had basically vetoed my return. 

Dodged a bullet or missed an opportunity? Who knows, but I could have used the extra 3k per year. 

 

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I would nearly always dissuade people from returning to a previous company unless the team was significantly different to the one I left or the money was irresistible and I was doing a short term ‘smash and grab’. 

I’m not sure about bullet dodging, but I wouldn’t be giving it a second thought. If it’s got you in the mindset of changing jobs then go to the whole of the market rather than just taking the odd approach. 

Good luck man. 

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1 hour ago, TheDoctor said:

Got a message the other day from a company I used to work for, asking if I'd be interested in being shortlisted for a job. I thought, what the hell, and went to the interview. 

Long story short, they rejected me because 1) I want too much money (I only wanted what I was on when I left) and 2) Because I'd have to work with someone who I'd previously had issues with (I raised a grievance over their bullying) and they had basically vetoed my return. 

Dodged a bullet or missed an opportunity? Who knows, but I could have used the extra 3k per year. 

 

They phoned you and then rejected you? 

Wankers.

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1 hour ago, TheDoctor said:

Dodged a bullet or missed an opportunity? Who knows, but I could have used the extra 3k per year.  

 

 

Definitely the former... would you really want to go back to working with someone you lodged a grievance against for bullying?

 

More money is always handy (although it doesn't sound  too promising on that front either) but it's not the be all and end all.

 

Frankly they sound like absolute tossers and you're well out of it. Better will come.

 

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34 minutes ago, BorniteIdentity said:

I would nearly always dissuade people from returning to a previous company unless the team was significantly different to the one I left or the money was irresistible and I was going a short term ‘smash and grab’. 

I’m not sure about bullet dodging, but I wouldn’t be giving it a second thought. If it’s got you in the mindset of changing jobs then go to the whole of the market rather than just taking the odd approach. 

Good luck man. 

This. 

I remember being asked why I wanted to leave my current job. And explaining that I don't, but i was contacted by your head Hunter (fucking 12 year old RC) and if they had something more interesting and lucrative, I'd consider jumping ship. 

Having not got it, I started to realise I could do better anyway.  

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I returned to a previous job earlier this year. Jumped ship and did the same role for a different company, found out they were absolutely shite and asked to return. There were no ill feelings when I left so they welcomed me back. I’m actually happier as I’ve found the grass isn’t always greener! 

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Thought I'd done well last night, after stumbling round the house like a zombie, trying desperately to find some part of the house that was even a quarter of a degree less roasting than any of the others, I sacked it off and took my pillow and alarm clock into the camper. Opened all the windows and rooflights... hmmm, not bad at all! Pretty soon I was out like the proverbial light.

 

I can't have been asleep more than half-an-hour when some fuckwad's cunting bastarding wankstain of a bastard burglar fucking  alarm went off...

 

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Off to Brighton for a jolly tomorrow, cheap (really cheap) trains so why not, except following a week of the hottest weather on record tomorrow is meant to rain, ffs! Only in this poxy country could you have record breaking weather and temperatures all the working week then piss down on Saturday.  Fortunately the bird im going with is almost as much an alcoholic as I am so it won't prevent a good day, but ffs man. You sweat ya arse off all week going to work then rains on your day off.

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12 minutes ago, EssDeeWon said:

Off to Brighton for a jolly tomorrow, cheap (really cheap) trains so why not, except following a week of the hottest weather on record tomorrow is meant to rain, ffs! Only in this poxy country could you have record breaking weather and temperatures all the working week then piss down on Saturday.  Fortunately the bird im going with is almost as much an alcoholic as I am so it won't prevent a good day, but ffs man. You sweat ya arse off all week going to work then rains on your day off.

Actually it's my fault!

Every time we book a few days away in the 'van, it fucking pisses it down. Doesn't matter where, or when, the whole country suffers because Mrs BMH and I are having a trip out!!!

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Work decided to get nasty again today with me.

1. Bossman wasn't at work and never is on a Friday. He seems to get a brave behind the keyboard when the mood takes him.

2. I sold a couple of new style lithium batteries to a France-based customer. The call was originally to our UK office which the 'golden boy' of the office took originally. However, I finished the sale and intially I was congratulated for it and it was added to the table. But because I had apparently annoyed the bossman by gently reminding him that he'd promised to buy us pizza for our efforts on the UK FR team (The FR team in France got thiers) my sales points were taken away and given to this golden boy (golden boy isn't a bad lad, he is young and quite keen but rather overly favoured and pampered by bossman) and when I contested this, I they then tried to issue me with a written warning (the chap who had the task of doing this sympathised with me and felt I was being treated unfairly) I refused to sign it as I didn't agree with accusations.

This, at a crucial time when I am about to embark on making the visa for wifey. FFS.

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Work decided to get nasty again today with me.
1. Bossman wasn't at work and never is on a Friday. He seems to get a brave behind the keyboard when the mood takes him.
2. I sold a couple of new style lithium batteries to a France-based customer. The call was originally to our UK office which the 'golden boy' of the office took originally. However, I finished the sale and intially I was congratulated for it and it was added to the table. But because I had apparently annoyed the bossman by gently reminding him that he'd promised to buy us pizza for our efforts on the UK FR team (The FR team in France got thiers) my sales points were taken away and given to this golden boy (golden boy isn't a bad lad, he is young and quite keen but rather overly favoured and pampered by bossman) and when I contested this, I they then tried to issue me with a written warning (the chap who had the task of doing this sympathised with me and felt I was being treated unfairly) I refused to sign it as I didn't agree with accusations.
This, at a crucial time when I am about to embark on making the visa for wifey. FFS.
Written warning FFS, what a load of cobblers.. ask about your right to appeal...

https://m.acas.org.uk/media/1047/Acas-Code-of-Practice-on-Discipline-and-Grievance/pdf/11287_CoP1_Disciplinary_Procedures_v1__Accessible.pdf




Sent from my Moto G (5) using Tapatalk

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Cheers man. I'm currently in touch with a very trusted shiter who has dealt with these types of cases before.

I did acas a call but the lady I got through to sounded quite disinterested and unhelpful. I'll try again on Monday, I'm sure I'll get through to someone more helpful. I just wanna cover all my bases in case things a get a tad nasty. I have been sending myself copies of emails sent to me being quite demanding, pressurising and some fairly unhelpful ones from the boss and manager.

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I'm STILL fighting for my HGV entitlement. It ran out on July 8th.

I've done another field of vision test, because the DVLA weren't happy with the way Specsavers did the first one.

The worst thing of all though, is my GP. The DVLA wrote to him requiring some info about my heart. At my GP's request, I had a heart ultrasound test a couple of months ago. I'm pretty sure my heart condition is normal. I went to see my GP yesterday - at his request - about a COPD review. Well, we hardly talked about COPD, I got stuck into him about the DVLA letter. He's had it sitting in his drawer for weeks and hadn't acted on it. He'd totally forgot about the heart ultrasound he'd sent me for. We had some harsh words. He wanted to know why I didn't do my HGV medical with him. I told him he was too expensive, he charges about a hundred quid. I got it for £47. I told him if he did it for 47 quid, I'd gladly go to him. He tried to infer I HAD to go to him for the medical. I told him in so many words that that was bollocks, I can go where I like.

Harsh words had the desired effect though, because about 30 mins after I got home, I had a call from the surgery to tell me the doctor had posted my cardiogram results off to the DVLA and there was a copy for me waiting at the surgery. I'm back there on Monday for a blood test - again at his request, so I'll pick it up then.

Jesus, once the DVLA and the medics get their hooks in you, it's bloody hard to wriggle free.

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Just after doing my provisional self-assessment for the paper return that I always send in each October. Unless there are other things I can justify putting under "expenses", it looks like there'll be a mighty tax payment for 2018/19....*sigh of resignation* 

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1 hour ago, Tadhg Tiogar said:

Just after doing my provisional self-assessment for the paper return that I always send in each October. Unless there are other things I can justify putting under "expenses", it looks like there'll be a mighty tax payment for 2018/19....*sigh of resignation* 

Why do it by paper.  The on line submission is so much easy..

 

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