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The grumpy thread


outlaw118

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3 hours ago, dozeydustman said:

Mother in law has lung cancer, the type caused by exposure to asbestos. No other info at the moment, how aggressive, how set in etc.

Mesothelioma (asbestos triggered lung cancer) is a horrible form of lung cancer. I hope things get better for you. Honestly, I do.

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12 minutes ago, Fumbler said:

Mesothelioma (asbestos triggered lung cancer) is a horrible form of lung cancer. I hope things get better for you. Honestly, I do.

SWMBOs ex >> brother has Meso... Man & Boy worked at Blyth Power Station [... like, what are all the turbine/pipes/boilerwork lagged with?] :(

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Thank you @Fumbler. I've not heard anything as to how advanced it is but MiLaw has been recommended to go for chemo as they *think* it's treatable at the moment. Knowing my in-laws they are not letting on the whole situation. Just got to support my wife and stepdaughter as much as possible and take some of the pressure off father in law - he's 78 and still as active as he can be with bad hips and bad knees.  I'm hoping my nearby nieces and nephews pick up the baton from time to time as well.

I have 2 sister in laws, one on the Isle of Wight who I know will try and get over most if not every weekend to see her, the other is totally hopeless at supporting others in times of need and is the sort that would normally claim she's had the same condition as someone but 9 times worse and survived it, because she lives in her own little bubble.

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5 hours ago, BoggyMires said:

...Now, he is a cunt. There's something in that I reckon and it's making stepson 1 be like this...even though he knows what his old man is like. I just can't figure out what. ...

We are made that way. 'tis in the genes, and as to which characteristics become more prominent is surely in the lap of the gods.

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Got a stomach bug, can't take my normal pain killers well its shown me how well they work and have been considering sawing various parts of my body off at various points.  Ordered a battery and charger set for a camera I got at a bargain price only the f charger in the packet so now have to send that back to get refund and find another source. 

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Cleaning an '06 Fucus with a pressure washer and making a bloody hole in it pissed me off today.

 

 

Compared to the previous posts I got away lightly and I salute your courage.

Rusty Focii are shite before their time though.

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On 5/22/2019 at 6:33 PM, BoggyMires said:

How'd you handle it? Looking forward to some time away, get home and missis gets a call from the school. Stepson 1 has offered a tictac to another pupil. Only it's an ibuprofen. I have my views believe me, but this kid is pushing some boundries recently, like for the last two years. We've done the talks, saw things from his perspective, tried to understand... And then this stunt. Step parenting is hard. If he was my kid I'd be winning the super champion arse kicking competition in approximately 20 minutes but I have to back seat it and support the missis. The thing is, he's a good, loving kid but goes out of his way to fuck his 14 year old life up. His old man is a useless twat as well, living some faux gangster lifestyle abroad, never financially supporting the kids he has. Now, he is a cunt. There's something in that I reckon and it's making stepson 1 be like this...even though he knows what his old man is like. I just can't figure out what. Step son 2 is a pure football and maths genius. Maybe some jealousy there eh? I'm out of ideas.

Sorry, whats he actually done? 

What was he intention?  

Who was encouraging him? 

Was the victim really innocent? 

Give the lad some slack. 

At 14, my parents were invited into school.to discuss my behaviour.  I was put on report. Meaning at the end of each class i had to get a form signed. 

After 4 weeks my form was inspected and i was critised by the deputy head for getting a single C for effort. Out of all A and Bs 

Looking back. My behaviour had changed. Id hit puberty with a growing hatred of authority. And i despised most of my peer group. The ones who had made the previous 3 years almost unbearable. 

If you want my advice, take him to a clmbing wall. Both of you do the ropes course, and every wednesday evening, spend 3 hours trusting each other to save the others life, by being attached on a bylay rope.  Challenge him and get him to challenge you to do scarey but safe. Talk to him like a fucking adult.

  Don't take the blue eyed boy. (Arrange it at a time wjjen he has maths club) 

 

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11 hours ago, New POD said:

Sorry, whats he actually done? 

What was he intention?  

Who was encouraging him? 

Was the victim really innocent? 

Give the lad some slack. 

At 14, my parents were invited into school.to discuss my behaviour.  I was put on report. Meaning at the end of each class i had to get a form signed. 

After 4 weeks my form was inspected and i was critised by the deputy head for getting a single C for effort. Out of all A and Bs 

Looking back. My behaviour had changed. Id hit puberty with a growing hatred of authority. And i despised most of my peer group. The ones who had made the previous 3 years almost unbearable. 

If you want my advice, take him to a clmbing wall. Both of you do the ropes course, and every wednesday evening, spend 3 hours trusting each other to save the others life, by being attached on a bylay rope.  Challenge him and get him to challenge you to do scarey but safe. Talk to him like a fucking adult.

  Don't take the blue eyed boy. (Arrange it at a time wjjen he has maths club) 

 

Thanks for that. I take it you turned out normal! I've done the talk, he was just pulling a joke without thinking about the consequences. The school have been looking for an excuse to bomb him since he was put into the naughty boys box 2 years ago and they've never given him time to change his attitude. Every minor disruption has been dealt with way too harshly. They've expelled his friends, they have a special unit where they transfer the naughty kids and their isolation is a fucking room with no windows! It's a target driven 1800's shit hole. Today they expelled him too.

He was on report when the teachers could be arsed to sign it, they lost interest in him on day two because he had clowns as mates and we haven't been able to recover from it. Their correspondence has been shocking or non existent, even up to this day where they emailed my missis, getting her surname totally wrong. If I feel like they have let him down and thrown him in the bin, gawd knows what he feels like. He's not the only one either, it's really common  If the kid threatens the grades, they are out. It's very sad but at least now we have to change direction.

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14 hours ago, New POD said:

Don't take the blue eyed boy. (Arrange it at a time wjjen he has maths club)

Can't agree with this - yes, talk to him like an adult...……. but don't alienate the other kid.

ALL of you go - the brothers can probably form a better bond too if they both like it. If they don't - take just one…….. but at least let it be their choice.

Good luck - it's the toughest of times going through it and (probably) parenting too (I'm yet to get there!!!)

The sad fact is none of us at 14(ish) are listening at all when repeatedly told our actions 'now' will impact the rest of our lives etc...… It's always just the 'oldies' being dramatic!

I'm not looking forward to that era at all.

 

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7ad71e1f221ef1c36d9d61b6f738e322.jpg Rot hole on the drivers side strut top on my 2002 V70. There’s a bit of rust underneath too. Probably not worth repairing seeing as it’s a high mileage clunker. A real pity as I was full on fixorating it to make a reasonably mint daily driver.

Also..

In a well known charity shop today looking at old maps and books (one of each I bought) First of all the elderly female assistant pretended to look at books while she kept her eye on me in a pretty obvious way. She wandered off and was replaced by a younger assistant who did exactly the same. When I went to pay the cashier spoke to the young assistant, nodded in my direction and asked if “everything was ok with him” (btw, I can still hear you if you try not to move your lips like some sort of ventriloquist act)

Do I look like some smack head looking for my next hit? Am I going to steal a Mills and Boon novel and sell it on the black market to fund my habit?

Launceston. IMHO an odd town full of odd people.


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50 minutes ago, Lankytim said:

7ad71e1f221ef1c36d9d61b6f738e322.jpg Rot hole on the drivers side strut top on my 2002 V70. There’s a bit of rust underneath too. Probably not worth repairing seeing as it’s a high mileage clunker. A real pity as I was full on fixorating it to make a reasonably mint daily driver.

Also..

In a well known charity shop today looking at old maps and books (one of each I bought) First of all the elderly female assistant pretended to look at books while she kept her eye on me in a pretty obvious way. She wandered off and was replaced by a younger assistant who did exactly the same. When I went to pay the cashier spoke to the young assistant, nodded in my direction and asked if “everything was ok with him” (btw, I can still hear you if you try not to move your lips like some sort of ventriloquist act)

Do I look like some smack head looking for my next hit? Am I going to steal a Mills and Boon novel and sell it on the black market to fund my habit?

Launceston. IMHO an odd town full of odd people.


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That doesn't look too bad TBF, disappointing from a Volvo though.

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50 minutes ago, bigstraight6 said:

That does rather sum up Launceston, deliverance country..

 

20 minutes ago, twosmoke300 said:

Yup weird old place 

I don't want to come across as snobbish or up my own ass or anything (maybe I am, I dunno) but Cornwall has all been great with friendly people but this place was just weird. Not very welcoming for some reason- We did overhear a conversation about Cornish pasties in a cafe where someone tried to order one, found out they were only "standard" pasties and walked out mid sentence, this exchange took about 5 minutes. I'm not sure if the guy was ill or it was some sort of drug deal going down in code that I didn't understand. I'm just glad to be back at our bungalow with a cup of tea and the front door shut and locked. 

9 minutes ago, JoeyEunos said:

That doesn't look too bad TBF, disappointing from a Volvo though.

It's fixable, of course. The old crate needs a bad oil leak fixing, the synchro is going on 3rd gear, the handbrake cables need replacing- is it worth it? Maybe it's time to go out and just get a non-rusty example and swap over the nece parts i've fitted to mine. 

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The real idiot wouldn't have waited for the angle grinder to stop spinning and would be taking their severed fingers to hospital in a bag of frozen peas. I know someone who did this but with a bandsaw, trying to reach past it while it was going, same person managed to build his hearing aid into the garden wall (took it out when he was working and put it on the wall that he was constructing and laid a bed of stone over it) and another time his top set if teeth fell in the cesspool  (he'd put them in his shirt pocket so that he wouldn't lose them and they fell out of his pocket into the tank when he was trying to replace the cover)

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12 hours ago, Lankytim said:

7ad71e1f221ef1c36d9d61b6f738e322.jpg Rot hole on the drivers side strut top on my 2002 V70. There’s a bit of rust underneath too. Probably not worth repairing seeing as it’s a high mileage clunker. A real pity as I was full on fixorating it to make a reasonably mint daily driver.

Also..

In a well known charity shop today looking at old maps and books (one of each I bought) First of all the elderly female assistant pretended to look at books while she kept her eye on me in a pretty obvious way. She wandered off and was replaced by a younger assistant who did exactly the same. When I went to pay the cashier spoke to the young assistant, nodded in my direction and asked if “everything was ok with him” (btw, I can still hear you if you try not to move your lips like some sort of ventriloquist act)

Do I look like some smack head looking for my next hit? Am I going to steal a Mills and Boon novel and sell it on the black market to fund my habit?

Launceston. IMHO an odd town full of odd people.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I would have gone back in and ask if they need any volunteers.  Tell them you are a paricularly good shop undercover security guard. And you would be happy to run a Security and safety course for all the staff. Because the way they followed you around the shop in such an obvious manner is likely to result in violence from a real smackhead. 

Put on your best Eton schoolboy accent, and be as condescending as you dare.

 

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How'd you handle it? Looking forward to some time away, get home and missis gets a call from the school. Stepson 1 has offered a tictac to another pupil. Only it's an ibuprofen. I have my views believe me, but this kid is pushing some boundries recently, like for the last two years. We've done the talks, saw things from his perspective, tried to understand... And then this stunt. Step parenting is hard. If he was my kid I'd be winning the super champion arse kicking competition in approximately 20 minutes but I have to back seat it and support the missis. The thing is, he's a good, loving kid but goes out of his way to fuck his 14 year old life up. His old man is a useless twat as well, living some faux gangster lifestyle abroad, never financially supporting the kids he has. Now, he is a cunt. There's something in that I reckon and it's making stepson 1 be like this...even though he knows what his old man is like. I just can't figure out what. Step son 2 is a pure football and maths genius. Maybe some jealousy there eh? I'm out of ideas.
We've had similar with our youngest, 16 on Sunday, technically my stepson but always treated as my own. He's struggled academically, is Dyslexic and the school have just asked us to get him tested for ADHD.

He's a crowd pleaser, started talking all gansta yo! Which drives me crazy, he's got his internal issues he's struggling with and spends loads of time alone in his room.

Most of the time he just grunts at me but there are a few things which I've found that work, mainly around spending time just the two of us doing things he enjoys, the main one is playing pool & snooker, we've joined a club and go a couple of times a month, when playing he's like a changed person, cool, calm and focussed, still a showoff but hey it's all good fun.

We've had many calls and talks with the school, the truth of it is for the last couple of years he's just wanted out of there and wants to get on with his life, we've taken the decision really that for his mental health that whatever will be will be with his exams, he's focussed on maths and English and will get an apprenticeship.

So, my advice fwiw is to cut him some slack, find something the two of you can do that he's passionate about and do on as equals and try and understand what the real reason behind behaviour is..



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things that are missing because it was given to you to put away ......  yeah right not ...

turned the house upside down last night looking for a missing passport , which WAS 100 PER CENT GIVEN TO ME TO PUT AWAY in the safe drawer ...  could/did   not find it last night

and I was again cast into the endless  pit of despair and reminded how important it was to put things away ...

had a crap night with my cold , all my leg /arm joints ached like they were on fire all night , then I was coughing and throwing up ....  at 7am ..

so I got up

so turned out the safe drawer again ,,nope

sorted out other piles of crap ,,, and binned then ......  nope

went around other piles of books / paper / shite which the poltergeist has now put in the bin ...  still nope

then when I looked out of the window ... there it was by the picture frame within arms reach of her pillow  , behind a book ....  

was 100 per cent never ever given to me to put away !!!

on the bright side I found a lost Asus tablet and cleared out loads of shite .

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^ I've been looking for my tube of Autosol.  Bought years ago to remove wiper scratches from the Volvo windscreen*

It has always lived on/in a small set of shelves in the understairs cupboard.  Looked there a dozen times and was blaming my son for taking it for his bike.

Looking for something completely different (not found) here's the Autosol right in front of me.

I estimate that it has been there over 20 years :)

 

*bought a replacement windscreen from a scrappy, spend several hours on a very hot July day removing it, got it home, removed the old one, fitted the replacement and went to clean it.

Someone had been using the wipers with no blade in and scratched some impressive arcs in the drivers half.  Took several hours and much Autosol and a B&D with polishing mop on to get it acceptable.

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On 5/22/2019 at 7:02 PM, dozeydustman said:

Thank you @Fumbler. I've not heard anything as to how advanced it is but MiLaw has been recommended to go for chemo as they *think* it's treatable at the moment. Knowing my in-laws they are not letting on the whole situation. Just got to support my wife and stepdaughter as much as possible and take some of the pressure off father in law - he's 78 and still as active as he can be with bad hips and bad knees.  I'm hoping my nearby nieces and nephews pick up the baton from time to time as well.

I have 2 sister in laws, one on the Isle of Wight who I know will try and get over most if not every weekend to see her, the other is totally hopeless at supporting others in times of need and is the sort that would normally claim she's had the same condition as someone but 9 times worse and survived it, because she lives in her own little bubble.

Father in law received a letter this morning. MiLaw doesn't get to see an oncologist for nearly another month. I don't know if this is because she's quite frail at the moment and may not be able to stand any therapies, or the writing is on the wall for her, or it's been caught early enough not to warrant urgent care. Hospital have offered no advice, leaflets etc to my father in law so this morning Mrs D and I have been contacting loads of charities etc for some advice. 

Perplexed and disappointed about this.

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