Wack Posted February 21, 2021 Share Posted February 21, 2021 This guy goes into a pub On his left shoulder is a beautiful parrot. On his right shoulder a cat He goes up to the bar and asks the parrot if he wants a drink , parrot says yes He asks the cat if he wants a drink, yes, but I'm not paying It's OK, I'll pay They drink up then the parrot says ,shall we have another , the cat replies , yes but I'm not paying The parrot says it's OK, I'll pay They drink up then the guy asks if they're having a third , cat says yes but I'm not paying At this point the barman says , what's with the cat not wanting to stand his round The man says , it's this genies fault I asked for an exotic bird with a tight pussy and this is what I got eddyramrod, Asimo, Rab and 3 others 3 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
High Jetter Posted February 21, 2021 Share Posted February 21, 2021 I guess the Joke thread must be closed, thankfully Remspoor 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
somewhatfoolish Posted February 21, 2021 Share Posted February 21, 2021 5 hours ago, Lord Sterling said: I've just had a look at the Renault 25 thread 😦 🤣🤣🤣🤣 Is it Autoshites time of the month or now something? ....Car for sale.... .....YAAAHTOOEXPENSIVE....GRAAAH...TYRESANDSCAMMING....MORENONSENSEAABOUTTYRESANDSOMETHINGABOUT.....CROWDFUNDINGANDTYRES....MYOPINIONIS.....GAAAH...ITHINKTHIS....YEAHWELLITHINK......PENNILESS.SODS....AAAAAAHHHH...ITHINKYOUROPINIONSTINKSANDIHAVEARIGHTTOMYOPINION......IDISAGREEANDTHEREFOREYOUAREWRONG....op-IAMNOWJUMPINGSHIP......GOODBYE.....YEAHBUTMYOPINION....DISAGREEMENTS....<the moderation department has now closed this thread. For further information, please re-read this thread> ...is generally how it across to me. I've had my laugh for today. I shall now go for a nap. The OP has a record of selective amnesia, flakey behaviour and being a massive hypocrite; flak he takes is earnt. Lord Sterling, GeorgeB and Amishtat 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bren Posted February 22, 2021 Share Posted February 22, 2021 Saw on the news the aircraft that landed in Denver missing a lot of it's starboard engine. People on the ground filming bits of the engine falling to earth. On youtube somebody remarked "Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit glue sniffing" dome, Craig the Princess, warch and 2 others 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iainrcz Posted February 22, 2021 Share Posted February 22, 2021 Someone brought some Bakewell tarts in tonight, So I've had 3.Marvelous.Sent from my VFD 710 using Tapatalk privatewire and Unlucky Alf 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remspoor Posted February 22, 2021 Share Posted February 22, 2021 From twitter, In Spain, this lorry has an accident. Under the first video is the second one where the recovery crane does this. 🤣 Rab, adw1977, dome and 8 others 1 10 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twosmoke300 Posted February 22, 2021 Share Posted February 22, 2021 Who the fuck stands under a load under a crane ? Tickman, Wack, louiepj and 3 others 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Garythesnail Posted February 22, 2021 Share Posted February 22, 2021 39 minutes ago, twosmoke300 said: Who the fuck stands under a load under a crane ? Pretty much anyone in a city centre being developed with tower cranes dotted about. Apart from that - the two plonkers in the video. I'm not 100% certain but there's a clue at the start of the video with some alarm wailing away - then stops. I think the alarm was the crane's warning that it was approaching its limit. I think it fell silent because the moron crane operator turned the 'over-ride' key to silence it and continue to operate . . . .right up until the point it overturned. There is a remote possibility that the crane's safety system was not properly calibrated (I am aware of an incidence of this having investigated the cause of a mild 'topple' where the operator was good, sensible guy who trusted the SLI in the machine), but unlikely given the alarm going off at the start of the video. Probably wrong. richardmorris and twosmoke300 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Saabnut Posted February 22, 2021 Share Posted February 22, 2021 All voxalls are shite! Sitting comfortable, cup of coffee in hand having just finished my tea and about to catch up on AS when there is a knock at the door. Now, those who have visited here will realise that it is a rare occurrence when pitch dark and 8pm. Gets up, looks out the window to see a gentleman with a torch shining on his "Police" badge on his uniform. Of course, my first thought is what have I done now? Quick conversation and it turns out some people had got lost in the forest behind me (out for exercise in daylight and taken the wrong path) and police had told them to make their way out and the PC had come to collect them. At least this was the official story, not that I believe it, but not for me to question. The relevant bit was he was stuck in the mud in the entrance to the field behind next door and had discovered there was no mobile signal. Could I help? Grabbed a selection of ropes and shackles with a torch and headed over in the Disco. It was a 14 plate Disastra diesel estate in full markings but both rear wheels were off the ground due to the build up of mud under the axle. After looking under it I found there was absolutely nothing to attach to on the back. After a search we found the unused towing eye, popped out the cover and discovered all the thread in the socket had rusted away! After 20 minutes prone in the mud I found a transit tie down, but any rope that would go through would not be strong enough to pull the car out. At this point the PC asked if he could use my phone to call for help, though it was very obvious he did not want to when I realised it was a police car so all normal rules were off! I threaded a ratchet strap through the spokes of the nearside rear wheel and hitched it onto the disco, and low ratio and diff lock soon had it out. Annoyed with myself for not thinking of doing that earlier and save myself from a mud bath! No damage. Turned him round and he thanked me profusely, saying he was very grateful. My parting words well, if you see me go past, don't check the MOT and tax too carefully! He was still laughing as he drove off. Beats watching the telly! Floatylight, eddyramrod, privatewire and 23 others 22 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
somewhatfoolish Posted February 23, 2021 Share Posted February 23, 2021 7 hours ago, twosmoke300 said: Who the fuck stands under a load under a crane ? Someone with a wish to fulfil Darwin's theory, especially with the "beware; stupid" gong going off? WTF is the point of the lift anyway? A strop onto the RH chassis member and it would flip upright with no need for it to leave the ground. myglaren 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wack Posted February 23, 2021 Share Posted February 23, 2021 Scousers , even at 100 they tell it like it is 1fde084399dad197551ab901da329646.mp4 steveo3002, Craig the Princess, Leyland Worldmaster and 5 others 3 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wack Posted February 23, 2021 Share Posted February 23, 2021 10 months to save up , what are you getting her beko1987, privatewire and Shite Ron 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
steveo3002 Posted February 23, 2021 Share Posted February 23, 2021 53 minutes ago, Wack said: Scousers , even at 100 they tell it like it is 1fde084399dad197551ab901da329646.mp4 795.42 kB · 0 downloads she's not wrong ... privatewire and Wack 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LightBulbFun Posted February 23, 2021 Share Posted February 23, 2021 On 11/06/2019 at 12:59, LightBulbFun said: decided to have another Bash at trouble shooting a Vintage Philips Radio I picked up in late 2013 from a charity shop in east Grinstead, at the time I deduced with a dim bulb tester and a variac that the mains input was dead short, but could not figure out how to pull the chassis out to investigate further well I still have not figured that out, but did figure out how to get enough access to let me have a closer look at things well I think I have sussed the issue snipped the sad looking capacitor out and no more mains short only problem is im not sure what value this cap is so I can replace it properly, nor do I currently have any schematics, sadly it exploded right where the markings are and I can only make out a H33KP and a 6 bellow that I think ill tentatively wire up the radio to my variac via dim bulb tester and see if I get any more life out of it sadly this radio is full of these black caps (I know they have a name in the "trade" but i cant recall it atm, just that they like to fail like above LOL) so I know ill have to replace all of those at some point as well if anyones wondering the Radio is a Philips 131U edit: woop found schematics/service info https://www.doctsf.com/documents/schematheques/radio_anglais/PHILIPS/131U.PDF edit2: looks like it was a 33nf cap across the mains for RF filtering, and those aint critical to operation so ill go ahead with testing 8 Sodding years, but thanks to some help from @R1152 (details of which can be found in the @beko1987-shite thread) I finally managed to figure out how to get the Chassis out of the case Woo! now I can have a proper stab at getting it working again hopefully R1152, privatewire, loserone and 4 others 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anonymous user Posted February 23, 2021 Share Posted February 23, 2021 8 hours ago, Wack said: 10 months to save up , what are you getting her And that's why Beko is single. #cruel Sorry Beko. Remspoor, Wack, myglaren and 1 other 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remspoor Posted February 23, 2021 Share Posted February 23, 2021 22 hours ago, twosmoke300 said: Who the fuck stands under a load under a crane ? MMM in this case a Spaniard. 🤣 But have seen other cluck nations do the same. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
artdjones Posted February 23, 2021 Share Posted February 23, 2021 17 hours ago, somewhatfoolish said: Someone with a wish to fulfil Darwin's theory, especially with the "beware; stupid" gong going off? WTF is the point of the lift anyway? A strop onto the RH chassis member and it would flip upright with no need for it to leave the ground. The Spanish are very bureaucratic about vehicle recovery, so maybe the crane is mandatory. I've been stopped from giving a push start before now. S2000 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
808 Estate Posted February 23, 2021 Share Posted February 23, 2021 I have absolutely no need for this, but the want is strong. GrumpiusMaximus, privatewire, Alan_Green and 1 other 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alan_Green Posted February 23, 2021 Share Posted February 23, 2021 chaseracer 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Equalizer Posted February 23, 2021 Share Posted February 23, 2021 20 minutes ago, 808 Estate said: I have absolutely no need for this, but the want is strong. I once got a bit of metal in my eye from being a tw6t using a mini-cutting tool and not wearing safety specs. Never ever again. Anyway, just after having the fleck of metal picked out of my eye the doctor told me I was lucky. The previous patient had been using a nail gun only for a nail to ricochet off the wall into his eye. Nice. Craig the Princess 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rab Posted February 23, 2021 Share Posted February 23, 2021 My book project is nearly complete..just funding process now. Its only taken 26 yrs...any help mightily appreciated it. https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/off-limits-berlin/off-limits-berlin-europe-1992-1996 Wilko220, chaseracer, Skizzer and 4 others 6 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andyrew Posted February 23, 2021 Share Posted February 23, 2021 A friend usually sends me a message when something useful is heading for the skip. I can usually make use or find a home for pretty much anything. A few lin bins were pictured. "Ill have whatevers going" is my usual response. I hate stuff being wasted. Madness. Banger Kenny, LightBulbFun, somewhatfoolish and 14 others 14 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wack Posted February 24, 2021 Share Posted February 24, 2021 10 hours ago, 808 Estate said: I have absolutely no need for this, but the want is strong. Nailed em both Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
meggersdog Posted February 24, 2021 Share Posted February 24, 2021 This came in the workshop today and reminded me I've still got a white Scalextric one in the loft The Moog, Stanky, Tickman and 6 others 9 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mitsisigma01 Posted February 24, 2021 Share Posted February 24, 2021 If only it was a nail gun GeorgeB 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GrumpiusMaximus Posted February 25, 2021 Share Posted February 25, 2021 Spoke to my cousin and her husband the other day. He (her husband) is a former Ford mechanic and big enthusiast. 'So, how are you getting on with your cars?' 'I've sold a couple' 'Yeah, he's managed to get it under 40. 36 is the current count I think...' eddyramrod, dome, Shite Ron and 2 others 2 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leyland Worldmaster Posted February 25, 2021 Share Posted February 25, 2021 I like it when I get assistance with choosing records and compact discs. Lord Boots has incredibly good taste and he picked out one of his favourite albums yesterday... Fumbler, GrumpiusMaximus, rainagain and 2 others 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eddyramrod Posted February 25, 2021 Share Posted February 25, 2021 I don't know how it's happened, but the sky isn't grey today, it's turned almost Olympic Blue and the overall light is quite bright, for a change. Is summer coming, or something? myglaren and The Moog 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anonymous user Posted February 25, 2021 Share Posted February 25, 2021 27 minutes ago, eddyramrod said: I don't know how it's happened, but the sky isn't grey today, it's turned almost Olympic Blue and the overall light is quite bright, for a change. Is summer coming, or something? It's not real, you have been put in suspended animation. Skizzer, myglaren and eddyramrod 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beko1987 Posted February 25, 2021 Share Posted February 25, 2021 It's a nice day here too! I've looked at my garden properly for the first time since last autumn and it's needing some De-wintering! Maybe this weekend... eddyramrod 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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