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Father Ted

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23 hours ago, bunglebus said:

My son in law (ish - girlfriend's daughter's husband) is a nidiot. He always goes at everything like a bull in a china shop, and tonight it has bitten him on the arse.

I suppose the story goes back a few weeks when he started complaining that the starter on his auto Ashtray had gone wrong. The one time I looked at it during a lovely rainstorm, it was because it wasn't in park...

Anyway fast forward to this afternoon, borrows my jack and axle stands so he can fit the new starter tomorrow. Not long after we get a call that he's gone through a ford and it's cut out and won't start. Said it was less than a foot deep and he was doing 10 MPH. Unfortunately for him, we're just leaving to get my girlfriend's Covid jab done, and we also have to go shopping as I'm away tomorrow and my GF hasn't passed her test yet, and to add another layer to the mix we have the GFs grandkids with us so they have to come along too.

By the time we get to them there's someone else trying to sort out towing the car - but it won't come out of park now. I'm thinking along the lines of wet electrics causing havoc, but that fault was just low battery voltage, jump leads from the Lupo saw enough juice to release the lever - but now I see the key blade snapped off in the ignition, and it won't turn off - just ign lights on or start position, which just rewards me with a thunk.  Turns out he got annoyed and turned the key hard enough to snap it, probably ruining the barrel in the process. Also the windows won't close.

Investigating under the bonnet revealed pools of water in every recess on top of the inlet manifold, and an air filter that I could wring out. Well that's fucked then.

Next problem is getting it out of the way, back wheels are still in the water and the steering lock won't release. This is where the trolley jack came into play, had to jack it up and shove it sideways several times to line it up with where we wanted to push it (uphill) to. It gained several dented wings in the process but the next stop is the bridge for this one.

Just to add insult to injury he stabbed me in the finger with a screwdriver while trying to get the stereo out, right where I already had an injury. And broke the stereo.

So to summarise, drove through a ford too fast, sucked water into the intake killing the engine, then ruined the ignition barrel because he was annoyed. Then called me to help while we're looking after their kids.

It wasn't a bad Astra either, now it's sat down a country lane with the windows open, so will probably be trashed/burnt/on bricks soon. 

Did I mention he fixes tanks for a living?

 

20210526_194126.jpg

PS - I told him to tell the police the car is there so they don't tow it and bill him, but I bet he doesn't bother.

Next thing will be wanting me to look at replacements with him but I think it's time he learnt to deal with his own problems now.

Just an FYI, those Astra's can have very good cats on them , may be worth checking the code on it before taking £100 scrap , code will be cast onto the manifold and will be GM--

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9 hours ago, omegod said:

Just an FYI, those Astra's can have very good cats on them , may be worth checking the code on it before taking £100 scrap , code will be cast onto the manifold and will be GM--

Yes, a friend of mine just got €250 for his and the buyer told him that he would get €350 from the metal company up in Dublin.

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Found out 2 reasons why the Cavs throttle stuck open last night:

#1

Blue collar is getting stuck inside the big grommet.

#2

20210528_111158.thumb.jpg.cbf1928286e46771e1cd988495a3e632.jpg

Five shite points to anyone that sees the 2nd reason  why the throttle might not have been able to return to idle....

Disclaimer: They're not mine!

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1 hour ago, Split_Pin said:

Found out 2 reasons why the Cavs throttle stuck open last night:

#1

 

Blue collar is getting stuck inside the big grommet.

#2

20210528_111158.thumb.jpg.cbf1928286e46771e1cd988495a3e632.jpg

Five shite points to anyone that sees the 2nd reason  why the throttle might not have been able to return to idle....

Disclaimer: They're not mine!

Wtf!? Wonder where they came from. What a coincidence that they landed and stayed in such a position to have that effect!

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My joyous little Scirocco had a load of money spent on it last month and yet has chosen to thank me with a sticking/stuck/fucked brake caliper. A chap wouldn't normally mind, but it's the Friday before a bank holiday, a day normally reserved for Leyland workers to knock together a load of Princess'. There's nothing doing until Tuesday.

Arse biscuits.

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2 hours ago, Split_Pin said:

Found out 2 reasons why the Cavs throttle stuck open last night:

#1

 

Blue collar is getting stuck inside the big grommet.

#2

20210528_111158.thumb.jpg.cbf1928286e46771e1cd988495a3e632.jpg

Five shite points to anyone that sees the 2nd reason  why the throttle might not have been able to return to idle....

Disclaimer: They're not mine!

Not only have you found the problem but you've got a free tool. Winner!

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The new whopping great big 096 battery has fixed the cranking problem. I'll still fit the starter relay this weekend, and the starter motor (Made by Lucas 0_0) later on this week. Basically doing one job at a time. I may also get round to replacing the ignition module on the distributor.

Also added more paint to the rear wing. Looks a bit of a mess but some polish will see it reet.

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1 minute ago, Tadhg Tiogar said:

Exide?

Yuasa. It's a big feller, but £69 with free postage on Amazon. Much more value than what Halfords had to offer. The old battery was a small Lion "Latest calcium" calcium battery which struggled to turn the engine over.

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21 hours ago, vulgalour said:

For the first time in a while I checked the oil and coolant today on the Maestro fully expecting them to need to be topped up and no, they're exactly where they were when I got the car and it hasn't used a drop of either.  No need for screenwash either since the bottle is about the size of an olympic swimming pool.  Brake fluid still exactly where it was too.  I genuinely expected it to have at least used a bit of oil, given the high mileage of the engine you'd at least expect a bit of oil burning but no, it's fine.

Hopefully it's not attempting to lull me into a false sense of security.

Might not be burning oil because it's high mileage? I.e. Plenty of hard driving has bedded the rings against the cylinder wall correct. 

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That's as good a theory as any I suppose.  I'm more used to old BL toot hitting around the 80k mark and needing valve stem seals and piston rings doing because they're shagged.  Maybe this one has just been well looked after, it certainly shows all the signs of regular maintenance and perhaps that's key to long term survival.  I really wish I had some history with it to back up my suspicions, I'd be fascinated to know how the car was used and serviced by the first owner.

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A thousand miles completed in the Vel satis. To celebrate I treated it to new spark plugs, which were well overdue a change, and bought a centre cap to replace the missing one. I've bought a Renault Clip diagnostic tool so hopefully at some point I'll get to the bottom of the esp light. Other than it just bowls along nicely.

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Carb You Rettor
PXL_20210528_205357339.thumb.jpg.00511822cdbf5bc254ddaf18cb69c3ec.jpg

Intake U-piece
PXL_20210528_205405020.thumb.jpg.75ed58d3c6b02cd581c97ecfa805b252.jpg
 

No bueno
PXL_20210528_205426418.thumb.jpg.e319c64853a707647d4996a902a22c46.jpg

Around 1mm between surfaces. I need to bulk up the neck of the carb with some weatherstripping. The amount of oily gunk around the flange shows the current setup is leaking very badly. It is, quite frankly, a shit design.

Also,
PXL_20210528_205455238.thumb.jpg.5de2eba67423b8dfdb7a7b91da6d4279.jpg

No wonder why it doesn't clamp very well. Another air leak bypassing the filter anyhow. That makes 2. I really should try and find a replacement... I wonder if Edwards & Son have one.

 

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15 hours ago, stuboy said:

Nothing exciting.... free breakfast from on of the depot managers, washed the car, and popped to see ffil and he found these whilst tidying up .. citreon cx? Rear wheel covers??

20210527_132815.jpg

20210528_174306.jpg

20210528_092057.jpg

Look like cx wheel spats. Series 2 are plastic, series 1 metal. Slightly different shapes too.

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