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Father Ted

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Today: waited until kids were distracted and opened a can of worms.

Then closed it again.

Then paid attention to kids, while being more confused, and having solved nothing.

At least I now know my instrument cluster is the VDO unit and it's not the easy fix, the one where you just re-solder the dry joints.

 

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God knows I've tried with these fucking things.

 

Heard banging noises about 1.30 this morning, ignored them.

Took missus to work these evening, got home looked at Merc and the passenger window and screen have gone. Called the police, and as I'm on the phone to them the local copper is outside anyway. Got the crime number, spoke to the outside copper and tried to open the car to look at the inside. Car won't unlock, so used skeleton key and got into it. Patches of black, smell of burning. Fucking thing must have caught fire behind the dash or on the A pillar, lucky it wasn't while going along.  Fuck this for a caper, I don't think Mercedes S Classes like me.

 

Pictures tomorrow.

 

 

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10 hours ago, Cavcraft said:

God knows I've tried with these fucking things.

 

Heard banging noises about 1.30 this morning, ignored them.

Took missus to work these evening, got home looked at Merc and the passenger window and screen have gone. Called the police, and as I'm on the phone to them the local copper is outside anyway. Got the crime number, spoke to the outside copper and tried to open the car to look at the inside. Car won't unlock, so used skeleton key and got into it. Patches of black, smell of burning. Fucking thing must have caught fire behind the dash or on the A pillar, lucky it wasn't while going along.  Fuck this for a caper, I don't think Mercedes S Classes like me.

 

Pictures tomorrow.

 

 

It's almost like S Classes have so much eltectronical trickery that the probability of some random and unnecessary piece of kit randomly shorting itself and committing the German equivalent of Seppuko tends to increase over time. Like the decaying element to Schroedinger's cat.

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"Where there's muck there's brass" or in my case where there's brass there's serious cash.

During the week i go around testing workshop tools and this includes doing annual CP7 safety inspections on oxy/acetylene equipment.

Anything date expired (5 year life on regulators and flashbacks) or damaged i replace.

So after 12 months i am left with lots of old regs and flashbacks that once i have removed the metal gauges from them i am looking at a large pile of brassy goodness.

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Unbeknown to me scrap brass is currently £2.60 a kilo and add in two AGM batteries and you end up with £170.80 credited to your bank account.

 

  

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1 hour ago, Joey spud said:

"Where there's muck there's brass" or in my case where there's brass there's serious cash.

During the week i go around testing workshop tools and this includes doing annual CP7 safety inspections on oxy/acetylene equipment.

Anything date expired (5 year life on regulators and flashbacks) or damaged i replace.

So after 12 months i am left with lots of old regs and flashbacks that once i had removed the metal gauges from left me with a large pile of brassy goodness.

20201227_113603.thumb.jpg.79d6f1422428ea61b0130c14527b62bb.jpg

Unbeknown to me scrap brass is currently £2.60 a kilo and add in two AGM batteries and you end up with £170.80 credited to your bank account.

 

  

Unless you work for yourself, probably better off not mentioning this on a public forum ?

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A productive few hours this weekend! The rear windscreen wiper hasn't been working on the Capri for ages - but with lockdown, house move, then other more important faults, it's taken a backseat. And another job that needed doing was the rocker cover - the old one was a bit past it and the lips not straight, hence leaky.  Again, a new one had been sitting on my windowsill since June... so last week got it out, picked up a gasket and fitted it...

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Yesterday, I took it round to the local garage to borrow one of the ramps - they had a quiet Saturday and offered if I wanted to borrow one for the afternoon.

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Given a good de-greasing and clean of the underside. A couple of bits need underseal replacing or tidying up, but bit cold for that today. And I want to replace the remainder of the fuel line, just because paranoid.

Rocker cover fitted, alternator adjusted, points done, all behaving beautifully.

Today time to look at the wiper down at the lockup. First things first, put 12v across the motor and it turned. Result!

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But what's this? Tracing the cables I discovered an earth which was rather tarnished...IMG_20210117_140204.thumb.jpg.53b471c1bb2bd7db9afe3427c404647c.jpg

which earths via the tailgate switch

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and when cleaned up seemed to be fine! Naturally I then discovered the switch wasn't properly home in the dash, so the dash had to come out to click it back in,

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but then we finally had a working rear wiper!

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Been out just now for another look. Honestly took all day as it sickened me to think what happened.

 

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Looks like possibly door mirror wiring or a speaker perhaps? It's fucked whatever happens.

The person I bought this from didn't seem remotely arsed about doing anything about it yesterday. Given the field he's in you think he might be. Perhaps he's having a think about it, we'll see.

Options are scrap it and lose over half its cost, or take it to a garage for an independent assessment then consider the next course of action. It could maybe be repaired but will surely be too expensive and it's spooked me so I just want it gone.  I know nuns/kittens/someone think of the kids, but my missus and daughter are frequent passengers in the car and it's unpleasant to think what might have happened.

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23 minutes ago, Cavcraft said:

Been out just now for another look. Honestly took all day as it sickened me to think what happened.

 

IMG_20210117_145740.thumb.jpg.e3e4fd144fdce1cd72d8878faa380e17.jpgIMG_20210117_145743.thumb.jpg.5e7936fa5e659439b323d927750adb8d.jpgIMG_20210117_145806.thumb.jpg.c15e2ec3ddc347cb0e119b723240dc13.jpgIMG_20210117_145804.thumb.jpg.079f6b53384cca3b62194b6df4183af3.jpg

 

Looks like possibly door mirror wiring or a speaker perhaps? It's fucked whatever happens.

The person I bought this from didn't seem remotely arsed about doing anything about it yesterday. Given the field he's in you think he might be. Perhaps he's having a think about it, we'll see.

Options are scrap it and lose over half its cost, or take it to a garage for an independent assessment then consider the next course of action. It could maybe be repaired but will surely be too expensive and it's spooked me so I just want it gone.  I know nuns/kittens/someone think of the kids, but my missus and daughter are frequent passengers in the car and it's unpleasant to think what might have happened.

An insurance claim shirley? And write-off probs.

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2 hours ago, Cavcraft said:

Been out just now for another look. Honestly took all day as it sickened me to think what happened.

 

IMG_20210117_145740.thumb.jpg.e3e4fd144fdce1cd72d8878faa380e17.jpgIMG_20210117_145743.thumb.jpg.5e7936fa5e659439b323d927750adb8d.jpgIMG_20210117_145806.thumb.jpg.c15e2ec3ddc347cb0e119b723240dc13.jpgIMG_20210117_145804.thumb.jpg.079f6b53384cca3b62194b6df4183af3.jpg

 

Looks like possibly door mirror wiring or a speaker perhaps? It's fucked whatever happens.

The person I bought this from didn't seem remotely arsed about doing anything about it yesterday. Given the field he's in you think he might be. Perhaps he's having a think about it, we'll see.

Options are scrap it and lose over half its cost, or take it to a garage for an independent assessment then consider the next course of action. It could maybe be repaired but will surely be too expensive and it's spooked me so I just want it gone.  I know nuns/kittens/someone think of the kids, but my missus and daughter are frequent passengers in the car and it's unpleasant to think what might have happened.

Sad to see this and a bit near home for me. My 2007 E320 passenger side mirror wiring is gradually failing,, it's lost tint, heat and up and down tilt. The E's  are known to fail though I've not seen a fire before but I should use this as a wake up call. 

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3 hours ago, Cavcraft said:

Been out just now for another look. Honestly took all day as it sickened me to think what happened.

 

IMG_20210117_145740.thumb.jpg.e3e4fd144fdce1cd72d8878faa380e17.jpgIMG_20210117_145743.thumb.jpg.5e7936fa5e659439b323d927750adb8d.jpgIMG_20210117_145806.thumb.jpg.c15e2ec3ddc347cb0e119b723240dc13.jpgIMG_20210117_145804.thumb.jpg.079f6b53384cca3b62194b6df4183af3.jpg

 

Looks like possibly door mirror wiring or a speaker perhaps? It's fucked whatever happens.

The person I bought this from didn't seem remotely arsed about doing anything about it yesterday. Given the field he's in you think he might be. Perhaps he's having a think about it, we'll see.

Options are scrap it and lose over half its cost, or take it to a garage for an independent assessment then consider the next course of action. It could maybe be repaired but will surely be too expensive and it's spooked me so I just want it gone.  I know nuns/kittens/someone think of the kids, but my missus and daughter are frequent passengers in the car and it's unpleasant to think what might have happened.

Does this have curtain airbags?   If so definitely worth being doubly careful in the vicinity...wonder if the supply wiring could be anything to do with it.  I've only messed with airbag systems once and that was a LONG time ago, and the trigger supply wiring was pretty substantial.

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4 hours ago, Cavcraft said:

Been out just now for another look. Honestly took all day as it sickened me to think what happened.

 

IMG_20210117_145740.thumb.jpg.e3e4fd144fdce1cd72d8878faa380e17.jpgIMG_20210117_145743.thumb.jpg.5e7936fa5e659439b323d927750adb8d.jpgIMG_20210117_145806.thumb.jpg.c15e2ec3ddc347cb0e119b723240dc13.jpgIMG_20210117_145804.thumb.jpg.079f6b53384cca3b62194b6df4183af3.jpg

 

Looks like possibly door mirror wiring or a speaker perhaps? It's fucked whatever happens.

The person I bought this from didn't seem remotely arsed about doing anything about it yesterday. Given the field he's in you think he might be. Perhaps he's having a think about it, we'll see.

Options are scrap it and lose over half its cost, or take it to a garage for an independent assessment then consider the next course of action. It could maybe be repaired but will surely be too expensive and it's spooked me so I just want it gone.  I know nuns/kittens/someone think of the kids, but my missus and daughter are frequent passengers in the car and it's unpleasant to think what might have happened.

That's abysmal. So glad you or anyone else was not in there at the time when it spontaneously combusted.

That's shit, you must be gutted.

 

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Jump started a friends car a citroen c3 2005 as they left something on, they live in a flat off the high Street and had no way to charge it in their side road so back we go to charge it at our house.
They get out of the car with the key in their hand but the engine still running.... well that just escalated, we then discover the engine stops if you press the brake pedal?
Disconect battery and have a look around at schitroen electronics, then stick battery on charge anyway.
Come back a few hours later and battery is charged, soon as its connected up everything is powered up as if ignition is on? Quickly went under the dash and disconnected all wiring to ignition barrel to rule out faulty ignition switch and dash is still lit up and engine has power to throttle body etc.
So we decided for now the best way to deal with this is to ignore it and disconnect the battery after use. Will get it to a garage soon for proper look at, bloody French electrics

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On 1/15/2021 at 10:59 AM, tabact said:

The Laguna I bought off SiC  last September has just passed it's MOT. Now it has a new ticket I'll put a couple of new tyres on the rear as they are down to 2.5mm. It's been fairly painless so far with just a few minor problems over the 5000 miles I've done in it. The sensor on the windscreen washer keeps telling me it is low so  I must have a look some time but it's hard to reach and I can't be arsed in this weather. The gearbox has been dropping into limp mode a few times lately, around 5 minutes after leaving home. Stopping and restarting have cleared it each time and I did finally get an error code P0715 which points to a sensor playing up rather than anything mechanical. A replacement sensor is only £20 or so and I'll live with it for the time being until the weather picks up or it decides to fail altogether. I'll buy the sensor and keep it in the boot just in case. The only thing I find annoying about it is the lack of a controllable intermittent wipe. The auto sensor intermittent wipe doesn't react quick enough when getting spray overtaking lorries.

Glad to hear it's still doing you well and happy it's passed its MOT without bother. I didn't expect any issues, but pleased it didn't really even have advisories apart from the tyres and weirdly that one rear shock.

The lack of adjustable sensitivity on the auto wipers I found weird as every Renault I've had, has that control. Including my current 02 reg Clio 172! I wonder if the Renault build factory messed up and put the wrong stalk in? Not as far fetched as it sounds. My first car (2003 Clio II) I had brand new, had the (fixed) intermittent wiper delay (no auto as low spec car) set to 1 second. It had to go back to the dealer for the delay to be reprogrammed back to 5 seconds. Maybe it's a case of changing the stalk and it'll have adjustable sensitivity then?

Saying that, I have found the auto wiper function on many different cars (including our 2010 A4) not react quickly in the scenario you gave. I usually put the wipers on continuous when it's raining for that reason. Also flick it to fast speed before I go past lorries.

Washer bottle is (iirc) in the driver's side front wheel arch. You could disconnect or bridging the sensor (not sure which way it works around) to remove the warning entirely. But then you'd loose the warning which I always find useful to have on cars. Pretty sure that most Laguna II had that sensor, so should be possible to get a cheap spare washer bottle from a scrappy 

Sorry to hear the gearbox played up. My grandad had trouble with it going into limp occasionally. Several garages tried finding the fault but could never get a code. The gearbox was mostly well behaved with me and never went into limp mode. So I put it down to my grandad not driving it regularly and the battery nearly flat by the time he used it next. Like most modern cars, they play up electrically if the batteries are low. I have very vague recollections of reading the codes when I first had it and saw a Turbine Speed sensor warning. Presumably this is the error code you saw? If it's external to the gearbox, might be worth taking it off to check for crap on the end of the sensor. 

You mentioned soon after you bought it that it had a slight vibration at speed. I suggested that it might be slightly flat spotted tyres where it had been sat (often problem I have - especially my cars in storage atm) and pumping the tyres up to the towing max for a bit. Did that problem settle down? If it's still there and you're putting new tyres on the back, then you could always try the old swap trick. If you do though, remember the flat tyre warnings (if you get one) will be in the wrong positions!

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Went for a nose in the FB profile of the chap that bought my Astra Coupe 2 years ago to see if he still had it. Just seen that it was for sale cheap spares and repairs earlier this month due to an idling issue. 

I reckon I know what's up and still have the part in my loft but alas the DVLA shows that the keeper has just been changed. Probably for the best as I'd maybe have bought it back.....

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Well the weather today was a bit more conducive to fettling so I got a few bits done.  FIrst order of business was to see whether the Delphi would talk to the BCM on the Rover.  As expected, the answer was no - it seems you need the proper T4 diagnostic software to communicate fully with a 75, and that is ££££.  I pulled the fuse on the central locking, which has stopped it from locking itself but hasn't cured the problem - the car's brain still thinks it's locked so keeps setting the hazards off.  I pulled the alarm fuse too but that doesn't seem to have made a difference - maybe it only covers the alarm sounder (which I'd disconnected anyway).  So not sure what to do about that - I'm a bit stumped TBH.

Next job was to plug the laptop into the diesel C2.  This was slightly more successful in that the software connected with the BSI, but it was showing no fault codes so I'm still not sure what's causing the little idiosyncrasies it has.  Also it wouldn't get the passenger door unlocked - I got it to ping the various functions, and I could make everything operate via the laptop except the unlock function.  The lock function worked fine, but when I selected the unlock function nothing happened.  So I think that part of the central locking system must have shat itself, and it did so at a point where the passenger door was deadlocked hence why I can't get it open.  I have managed, with some wrangling, to get the door card off the passenger door with the door closed, which I wasn't sure that I'd be able to do (previous owner took an angle grinder to the driver's door card when the driver's door locked itself, and then bought a replacement off eBay - my method is cheaper as the only casualties were a couple of plastic clips).  However a look inside the door didn't immediately reveal an easy way to get the thing unlocked manually.  I think the only option is to find which wire of the many that go into the latch mechanism operates  the unlock motor, and then put 12v to that and hope it does its job.

I then stuck it back up on the jack and refitted the wheel arch liner on the driver's side - with the amount of crap on the roads at the minute I'm worried that if I drive for too long without it I'll end up killing the alternator again - and fitted a refill to the rear wiper blade.  It's now as together as it needs to be for the time being.

Next job was to get the petrol C2 up on the ramps to investigate the extent of the rot in the offside sill.  The side skirt came off fairly easily - four expanding rivets underneath and a load of plastic push clips along the side - and I was relieved to see that the rot does appear to be confined to the bit I could see before, although the bit that has gone is slightly worse than I thought - a bit of poking with the screwdriver prised the outer sill away from the inner.  Still, it's not as bad as the one that was posted on here the other day, and it's definitely doable.  I'm going to book it in for a test at some point soon to a. make sure it doesn't need too much else and b. get a quote from the garage for patching up the sill.

This evening I finally got to do a successful 0-60 run in the Iveco.  The result is... drumroll please... 60.4 seconds.  That is the slowest time I've ever recorded - two full seconds behind the Dodge 50, 7 seconds behind the Ligier Ambra, 20 seconds behind a fugging Class 745 train and, more relevantly, 22 seconds slower than the last Iveco Daily I owned.  Granted that was a SWB low top, and as such had less weight and less wind resistance, but even so there shouldn't be that much of a difference.  I have a feeling the accelerator pedal isn't moving the arm on the pump through its full travel - unfortunately it's a bit awkward to check that on my own and I can't ask a friendly neighbour to help at the moment because lockdown.  I can't even do my normal trick of using a car battery to wedge the pedal fully down as there isn't room.  Still, it's not like I was about to take it to Santa Pod anyway...

 

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12 hours ago, SiC said:

Washer bottle is (iirc) in the driver's side front wheel arch. You could disconnect or bridging the sensor (not sure which way it works around) to remove the warning entirely. But then you'd loose the warning which I always find useful to have on cars. Pretty sure that most Laguna II had that sensor, so should be possible to get a cheap spare washer bottle from a scrappy 

Sorry to hear the gearbox played up. My grandad had trouble with it going into limp occasionally. Several garages tried finding the fault but could never get a code. The gearbox was mostly well behaved with me and never went into limp mode. So I put it down to my grandad not driving it regularly and the battery nearly flat by the time he used it next. Like most modern cars, they play up electrically if the batteries are low. I have very vague recollections of reading the codes when I first had it and saw a Turbine Speed sensor warning. Presumably this is the error code you saw? If it's external to the gearbox, might be worth taking it off to check for crap on the end of the sensor. 

You mentioned soon after you bought it that it had a slight vibration at speed. I suggested that it might be slightly flat spotted tyres where it had been sat (often problem I have - especially my cars in storage atm) and pumping the tyres up to the towing max for a bit. Did that problem settle down? If it's still there and you're putting new tyres on the back, then you could always try the old swap trick. If you do though, remember the flat tyre warnings (if you get one) will be in the wrong positions!

Looking at Renault forums pulling the sensor outof the washer bottle and giving it a clean sometimes clears it if not I'll replace it at some stage. You have to remove the wheel liner to get decent access to the bottle so if we get a nice sunny day I may get round to it. The bottle has a large capacity and took 4.5 litres when I topped it up the other day.

The turbine speed sensor warning is the one I got. Again looking at Renault forums the symptoms match this sensor being faulty and it's on top of the transmission so relatively easy access but you have to remove pretty much everything above it to reach it.

The tyres settled down after a bit of use and looking at some of the reviews when I was looking around for prices a few people were complaing about their Kumho tyres going out of shape easily. I'll get the new ones next month and also get the aircon looked at the same time.

The only other tiny problems I've had is with 20 year old plastic. The right hand number plate light holder crumbled a bit when I changed the bulb but solid enough to avoid having to replace it and the plastic tray under the centre console snapped off where it clipped on.

According to the trip computer I'm getting 30.7 mpg but it's actually more like 29 mpg but you do need to put your foot down to get it moving and I've averaged 36.3 mph since I collected it from you.

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20 hours ago, Cavcraft said:

Been out just now for another look. Honestly took all day as it sickened me to think what happened.

 

IMG_20210117_145740.thumb.jpg.e3e4fd144fdce1cd72d8878faa380e17.jpgIMG_20210117_145743.thumb.jpg.5e7936fa5e659439b323d927750adb8d.jpgIMG_20210117_145806.thumb.jpg.c15e2ec3ddc347cb0e119b723240dc13.jpgIMG_20210117_145804.thumb.jpg.079f6b53384cca3b62194b6df4183af3.jpg

 

Looks like possibly door mirror wiring or a speaker perhaps? It's fucked whatever happens.

The person I bought this from didn't seem remotely arsed about doing anything about it yesterday. Given the field he's in you think he might be. Perhaps he's having a think about it, we'll see.

Options are scrap it and lose over half its cost, or take it to a garage for an independent assessment then consider the next course of action. It could maybe be repaired but will surely be too expensive and it's spooked me so I just want it gone.  I know nuns/kittens/someone think of the kids, but my missus and daughter are frequent passengers in the car and it's unpleasant to think what might have happened.

The only positive I can think of Billy is that no one was in the car. 

I would price what you need to repair - if it's silly then offer it for spares.

I am wary of dodgy electrics - we had a mk 2 cav with a fusebox that looked like icing on a cake - it must have got very hot.

It's why flood damaged cars are a no no - its not the biological aspect but water in the wiring can lead to corrosion and resistance.

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12 hours ago, wuvvum said:

Well the weather today was a bit more conducive to fettling so I got a few bits done.  FIrst order of business was to see whether the Delphi would talk to the BCM on the Rover.  As expected, the answer was no - it seems you need the proper T4 diagnostic software to communicate fully with a 75, and that is ££££.  I pulled the fuse on the central locking, which has stopped it from locking itself but hasn't cured the problem - the car's brain still thinks it's locked so keeps setting the hazards off.  I pulled the alarm fuse too but that doesn't seem to have made a difference - maybe it only covers the alarm sounder (which I'd disconnected anyway).  So not sure what to do about that - I'm a bit stumped TBH.

 

Which engine? My garage had some success communicating with my 75 by telling the computer it was talking to a BMW 3-Series E46 (I think). That was to investigate the ABS issue. Which seems to have come back again. (joy).

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