The new news 24 thread

[hairymel]

On 9/15/2019 at 4:50 PM, hairymel said:

My best drinking buddy changed a front spring on his sons e87 1series bmw.

Of course as soon as he had finished that it randomly came up with a electronic steering lock error and wouldn't even start.

I was asked to help.

Foolishly I said yes.

My delphi ds150 clone with cars2014 and WOW wouldnt clear the fault so we bought a bmw k+dcan cable and I installed bmw standard tools.

I spent an evening installing this. Then another evening pissing about trying to clear the fault then another evening trying to update the cas (car access sytem) firmware as a suggested fix.

Then another evening digging through the dash to remove the electronic steering lock which is affixed by 5 sided security torx screws.which we didn't have a suitable bit for.

I managed to get the lock motor to actuate but it was decided to buy a £70 lock emulator rather than put the lock back on and have it fail again.

This cleared the fault but now the immobiliser (cas - dme) was throwing up a tamper fault.

By this time the install of bmw tools was buggered by having to keep changing settings between the programs to get the cable to work.

Deep despair caused many beers. And discussion of scrap values.

I spent 13 hours reinstalling the software plus versions of ista p and d (older bmw main dealer software) paying close attention to configs so I didn't have to fudge the settings if I needed to change the program I was using.

I wish using unsupported pirated main dealer software was easier?

After almost 2 weeks of spending every spare minute scouring the internet to understand the problem, and downloading nearly 1/2 a terabyte of files, I spent an hour today resetting stuff and screwing the interior back together and normal service has resumed.

Tldr

Stupid idea having a cheap plastic Chinese toy thing to work the steering lock and computerised diagnosis/repair is not the same as undoing a couple of shear bolts.

Fixed it though?

 

Had a customer return on this one

Radio had lost the aux option? Obviously all my fault.

Factory fitted aux/USBn the armrest but won't come up on the mode select of the radio.

Parrot hands free also has stopped working.

Lots of googling and apparently the radio needs to see a resistor across the inputs and also have a firmware flag present to allow aux function. Also usually buggers up with a flat/ removed battery.

Got him to disassemble the dash as penance while I tried to reflash the radio.

1+1/2 hrs of pissing about and I managed to set the aux on flag in the firmware and laugh at the birds nest of wiring and interface boxes he had uncovered.

Bmw oem aux works now so I said the parrot is not my problem?

Since my previous fiddling the rain sensor triggered front wipers and reverse triggered rear wiper now both work which they never did before.

I call it a win?

 

[hairymel]

Also in dispatches :

a friend whos fiesta i welded back together a couple of years ago came back with a request for a couple of small patches on the outer sill.

I even got her to ask her mot man if he was certain it was only the outer sill.

 

He was either very lax or wanted to fcuk me over.

Front on the other side was just as bad all the way into the floor pan. 

Done and moted now though.

Just have to work my way through a very large stock of thank you booze ? 

 

[beko1987]

Look on YouTube for videos, I'm sure e-spares have done one

[Split_Pin]

8 hours ago, hairymel said:

Also in dispatches :

a friend whos fiesta i welded back together a couple of years ago came back with a request for a couple of small patches on the outer sill.

I even got her to ask her mot man if he was certain it was only the outer sill.

 

He was either very lax or wanted to fcuk me over.

Front on the other side was just as bad all the way into the floor pan. 

Done and moted now though.

Just have to work my way through a very large stock of thank you booze ? 

 

You should start a thread for your escapades, good reading!

[hairymel]

Sadly I have been very quiet on the car front for sometime. I have not touched any of my projects for ages. This burst of activity was just helping some close friends out.

Tbh they were both fairly dreadful jobs but i find it much easier working on other people's cars. Perhaps it because I just want the pain to end rather than worrying about when im next going to put the kettle on?

Edited September 27, 2019 by hairymel
To say I am glad split_pin gets enjoyment from my misery :-D

[Tickman]

16 minutes ago, hairymel said:

To say I am glad split_pin gets enjoyment from my misery

He isn't the only one

Just remember a problem shared...

[hairymel]

Just now, Tickman said:

Just remember a problem shared...

In my experience that proverb does not compute if you are the poor sod who has the problem shared* with?

[Cavcraft]

On 9/24/2019 at 6:59 PM, Skizzer said:

 

please 

make

it

stop

/\ This.

 

It's creeping into every possible thread at the moment it seems.

[LightBulbFun]

48 minutes ago, Cavcraft said:

/\ This.

 

It's creeping into every possible thread at the moment it seems.

but your honor he WAS wearing an Invacar T shirt already!

(tbh I was surprised he dared pose for a photo wearing it given such responses when you post anything invacar outside the Invacar threads these days LOL)

[scdan4]

Today in 1908 the model t started production, here.

[Tadhg Tiogar]

News from Garage Dubois-Loizou, and apparently the CX has refused to start; Monsieur Loizou turned the key several times only to be met by a shrug of indifference from the starter motor. Admittedly this is something which has always affected the car and it has happened to me - I just forgot to warn them of this.

Half the reason is the emergency spare battery I put in after the big one got fried. The CX tends to turn its nose up at any battery under about 68Ah, and the spare is 64Ah. The fried one was 77Ah.

[egg]

ebay are offering 10% on quite a lot of items (minimum spend £50). Might be worth it if you are watching a big ticket item that you need!

[richardmorris]

Got home this evening to the bill for the ac work on the Mercedes. More than I’d hoped, but less than I expected. Just need to sell the one kidney! 

[Tadhg Tiogar]

Apparently the new Valeo alternator has been fitted to the CX at Garage Dubois-Loizou. The long-suffering Monsieur Loizou did the work outdoors and was comprehensively rained upon for his pains.

Once fitted, he turned the key, only for the starter motor to shrug with indifference at the suggestion that it might start the engine.  I can't wait to see what happens next. 

[Supernaut]

1 hour ago, Tadhg Tiogar said:

Apparently the new Valeo alternator has been fitted to the CX at Garage Dubois-Loizou. The long-suffering Monsieur Loizou did the work outdoors and was comprehensively rained upon for his pains.

Once fitted, he turned the key, only for the starter motor to shrug with indifference at the suggestion that it might start the engine.  I can't wait to see the size of the bill.

FTFY

[Tadhg Tiogar]

6 minutes ago, Supernaut said:

FTFY

Believe me,  it will be a substantial bill, much of it for laundry.....

[davehedgehog31]

It's a beautiful morning and I'm away to look at a caur. 

 

[Alan_Green]

That's interesting. So the Springburn sign has the gaelic version below?  Do people like that? It seems odd to me. Springburn is about as far from gaelic culture as you could get (and I was born in Springburn BTW). Does this kind of celtification anger loyalist types? 

[Vince70]

18 hours ago, egg said:

ebay are offering 10% on quite a lot of items (minimum spend £50). Might be worth it if you are watching a big ticket item that you need!

Thanks I’ve just bought a nice new imac for £50 and the code has taken it down to £45 and also I went through Quidco so any cheaper and I think it would of been given away.

[wuvvum]

Off on a collection mission - sadly nowhere near as exciting as the SVM's shenanigans last night, and hopefully nowhere near as eventful.  Just boarded train 1 of 4 (not including the Choob) - there is actually a direct train from Norwich which would deposit me 500 yards from the seller's house, but it's significantly more expensive and only marginally quicker, so I'm doing it the hard way. 

Apparently today is the first day in service for Greater Anglia's fancy new diesel trains on the Cambridge line, but the London service is still the good old Class 90 and slam door coaches. 

[wuvvum]

It appears that there is a football occurring today - this train is quite noisy. 

[hairnet]

On 9/24/2019 at 10:23 PM, RobT said:

I've been road tripping too, as last week was holiday time and we went to...

Going over the Oresund Bridge and then spending time looking at it was a highlight.

 

 

It may look like Lincolnshire, but no it's rural Skane, about 15 miles from Ystad.  From what I've seen Sweden is pleasant, clean and civilised.  Lund in particular had a nice feel about it.  Will definitely go again.

done similar

used the ferry instead as it was cheaper

will do it one day tho 

[Split_Pin]

1 hour ago, Alan_Green said:

That's interesting. So the Springburn sign has the gaelic version below?  Do people like that? It seems odd to me. Springburn is about as far from gaelic culture as you could get (and I was born in Springburn BTW). Does this kind of celtification anger loyalist types? 

I think it just confuses everybody in Scotland because it's an ugly language spoken by no-one who lives there (ok, a few). 

Road signs appear in 2 languages once you enter Highland Region(TM) and northwards. If it's a multiple-exit roundabout, the sign can look a bit busy.

[clayts450]

Quick trip over to Rimmers this morning (to swerve their postage and to give one of the fleet a runout).

All going swimmingly well in the 'onda until just outside Lincoln where there was a sound like a stone being chucked out of the nsf wheelarch followed by a repetitive clunk. Pulled over - no flames or owt, so did the last few miles at granny speed. Pulled into Rimmers, reversed, big clunk. Knocking noise gone. Shrugged shoulders and drove home after picking up my goody bag.

Will pull the wheel off later, but I suspect something caliper related, as there is an interesting* noise when braking now.

[shedenvy]

Can you see it?

Only a bloody Lancia Stratos. Weapons grade shite.

A120 near Colchester.

[richardmorris]

7 minutes ago, shedenvy said:

Can you see it?

Only a bloody Lancia Stratos. Weapons grade shite.

A120 near Colchester.

I wonder if he knows auto Italia at Stanford hall this weekend is cancelled?

[wuvvum]

I'm going to miss these old heaps when they're gone. 

Heading underground now. 

[davehedgehog31]

3 hours ago, davehedgehog31 said:

It's a beautiful morning and I'm away to look at a caur. 

 

It's a beautiful early efternoon and I've bought a caur. 

Rendezvous with 320T for shlep to East Kilbride. 

The sights of EK (archishite thread fur this pish) 

New steed. 1.9 TDI, long MOT and low miles. Drives nice. Usual scabbiness but seems solid in right places. 

Mild haggling based on a clunky engine or gearbox mount. Had 3/4 of a tank of fuel so what was I meant to do? 

[davehedgehog31]

3 hours ago, Alan_Green said:

That's interesting. So the Springburn sign has the gaelic version below?  Do people like that? It seems odd to me. Springburn is about as far from gaelic culture as you could get (and I was born in Springburn BTW). Does this kind of celtification anger loyalist types? 

I think it's "birthday caird pish" personally. No practical reason for it, don't think there's many gaelic speakers anywhere other than the North West and even they all speak English nowadays... 

Not heard of it angering any of the flute band types, but Grass being green angers them so we never can be sure. 

[RobT]

1 hour ago, hairnet said:

done similar

used the ferry instead as it was cheaper

will do it one day tho 

I bought a tag, which made it half price and can also be used on the Great Belt bridge.  The latter was full price, but two crossings on each totalled £98.

I did consider getting the ferry, but was enjoying the drive so went the long, more expensive way!