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Memoirs from the Hard Shoulder: bASeman's Spot of the Year award.


BorniteIdentity

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5 minutes ago, SiC said:

So basically if it wasn't for Boris and his MOT extension, you'd be a bit fucked car wise?

No, it would have all been done sooner.  The Avensis has always had an open cheque book so it would have just had whatever in the same way it always has.  The Granvia? Not a single advisory last year and it's done about 1,000 miles since.  I was properly under it the other day and everything looks as sound as it ever did.  I appreciate I'm not the man from the ministry, but I'm not concerned.

As for the Mini? The only person who that will hurt is me.  I've actually only done two journeys in it since its actual MOT lapsed in May, totalling about 10 miles. 

It's almost impossible to be fucked when you've got another 4 on the road.  What the COVID extension scheme has allowed is breathing space, thinking time and - most valuably - the opportunity to spread MOTs around.  Otherwise the worrying 4 were all within 6 weeks.

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1 minute ago, SiC said:

Sorry wasn't meant to be a derogatory statement, just an amusing observation. 

Isn't the Mini exempt soon?

It's alright, mate! No offence taken!

4 years.  I'm not sure whether I will test the Sierra/Mini once they're 40 - or just pay the garage for an hours labour to give them a really good going over each year.  I'm lucky anyway with my MOT man that he's on my side and works with me; if stuff needs doing - as in the old days - he trusts me to get it the required attention (often by him straight afterwards to avoid a fail/pass scenario). 

There's an argument that an MOT is £45 vs 1 hour's labour at £50 plus VAT - but I dunno.  There's a stubborn part of me that thinks "I don't have to - therefore I won't".  But a pragmatic side who absolutely knows that a second opinion is almost vital.  Especially when you're a novice.

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  • 2 weeks later...

As reported in the GOM thread, the Granvia decided to fuck me about today. 20 miles into the 75 mile journey to Drayton Manor - van full of kids (all my own, your honour) -and the Toyota declared four gears to be excessive and reverted to just three. Great. The final 55 miles were done in third with a sniff of overdrive and the OD light even began flashing on the last stretch. 

Disregarded it and enjoyed our day because it’s a Toyota... they ALWAYS get you home again. Once cool, gearbox was fine until - again - we went up a long hill on the A14 and then I was reduced to three. It never once felt like it would stop; these things might not be pretty or desirable but they just keep plodding! 

Online googling tells me speed sensor, solenoid or fluid. My chum who’s a prolific jap botherer in the Home Counties will look at it soon and hopefully get us properly motoring again, as I doubt we’re bettering 20mpg with three! 

If it’s anything more than the above, it’s the end of the road. This is my way into a nice Caravelle or maybe even an Amazon. But if we can keep it alive it’d be nice. Spares are becoming difficult, but I guess they’ll always be available in one form or another for some time yet. 

Cars eh?! 

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Funnily enough my Granvia's been giving me the autobox fear since being woken up from lockdown slumber - I'm fairly sure it's not meant to smell of burning clutch during a moderately brisk takeoff.  I'm going with ignoring it until something explodes, which is also now the method for dealing with the copious suspension rattles.  

Fingers crossed yours can be resolved with a fluid change!

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Spoke to my mate - he says the 3 gears thing is a fail safe. My money is on some sort of solenoid issue, but I am going to look at removing the mph chip - I’m happy reading kph so looking forward to fishing that out. 

The man can’t look at it until late next month, so it’s in the naughty corner for now. 

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1 hour ago, BorniteIdentity said:

Spoke to my mate - he says the 3 gears thing is a fail safe. My money is on some sort of solenoid issue, but I am going to look at removing the mph chip - I’m happy reading kph so looking forward to fishing that out. 

The man can’t look at it until late next month, so it’s in the naughty corner for now. 

I wondered why I had heard reports of a Granvia sulking in a corner wearing a hat with a huge D on it ?

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Huge thanks to @N19for his wonderful gift and donation to the bASe cause.

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Two new rear clusters as the last ones were mismatched and fucked; allowing water into the boot (there was actually one very thin blade of grass growing on the boot carpet. YUK).

There's a bit of wiring to do; this light will flash on indicator but not on Hazard.  The boot door itself is also filling with water and draining the second you open it.  Not sure if there's a leak somewhere from when Simon fitted the new screen or what.  I'll keep an eye on it.

Sierra is now SORN for winter.  Mojo is low this year and it's stupid taxing the bloody thing to never use it.  The clutch requires attention and the MOT is up next month, so I'll just let it rest over winter and review things in Spring.  

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6 minutes ago, BorniteIdentity said:

The boot door itself is also filling with water

As MK1/MK2 and MK3 Mondeos do too as they age. Good old Ford and their commitment to Total Quality Management! :-)

Lovely gesture though re: the lights. 3 years until MOT exemption anyways...(blimey).

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35 minutes ago, BorniteIdentity said:

Alright kids?

Can anyone identify what phase of MK1 Clio this wing would have come off?

s-l1600.jpg

The seller doesn't know and can't remember the reg number either.

Does the positioning of the 1.4 on the wing make it a PH1? I need either a PH1 or 2!

Ta

Yes -  the Mk 1 Phase 1 has the engine size on the wing.

The Mk1 Phase 2/3 has the engine size on the door.

 

However - and don't quote me on this, as it's a bit more hazy - I think the wing shape is exactly the same - it was only the bonnet and headlights that changed.

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7 hours ago, Timewaster said:

That phase 3 face lift absolutely killed the Clio for me. 

I really like the rectangular light styling but the weird curved lights don't fit with the rest of the car and it just reminds me of when Reliant bodged Corsa lights onto the front of the Robin. 

I'm the other way around, I prefer the Phase 3 facelift. I can't explain why, I just think the front end looks nicer with the curved lights!

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  • 2 weeks later...

This week saw the faithful Avensis turn 21 - not a birthday most cars see, and yet I still see it as a young lady. 

It was bought summer 2013 to get me out of a hole having had malady after malady with an oil burning VVTi. 4 days after I bought it we took it on holiday to Devon, a trip we won’t forget. 

14BBC4B5-D602-4AE3-BA9A-9C00019287B2.thumb.jpeg.03ce346b9dfcdecb28e15825e635d90b.jpeg
 

Here it is with paint gleaming and just 100,500 miles on the spinner. Today it looks a little sorrier with 261,950 on the digits. 

I think, quite frequently, about the future of it. I’d like it to be an example to others on how everything is eminently fixable and repairable and how it CAN plod on indefinitely. I’d also like something a bit fresher sometimes. 

Maybe the answer is to sell an old heap and add this to the heritage fleet. Who knows. 

A76B411E-AC20-4770-B893-33BE130CA40B.thumb.jpeg.fe68f9d86e0bdb824dcfdf0eefb32c8e.jpeg

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  • BorniteIdentity changed the title to Bornite's Memoirs - A Bornite Birthday
15 hours ago, BorniteIdentity said:

everything is eminently fixable and repairable and how it CAN plod on indefinitely. I’d also like something a bit fresher sometimes

Having a similar conversation with Outlaw_Jnr recently.

His Focus has been pretty reliable, only 2 FTPs, one self inflicted when demonstrating to Micro_Outlaw what a spark plug does and shorted out the ECU, the other the alternator dying after 160k and 17 years....

He's bored with it; but in the midst of a divorce, saving frantically for a house, funds are tight. A £2k budget was suggested, so after looking at various possibles, it was decided to keep the Focus and piss a bit of money getting it through an Mot. Better the devil you know was the thinking behind it. He's had "nice"* cars before (Focus ST2,  Kuga, new Fiestas) but never really gelled with any of them. His favourite car to this day is a Mazda 323F bought for £150. Never broke down, and only disposed of becuase his then girlfriend didn't like it. 

As we all know, older stuff has character, and having put 160k on your Toyota I fully understand why you'd like something else, but I reckon after that sort of commitment she feels like a comfy old pair of slippers, and that's not a bad thing.

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2 minutes ago, outlaw118 said:

feels like a comfy old pair of slippers, and that's not a bad thing.

This is exactly what the wife says about it.  I don't know what we'd do without it now really.  

I've been offered my mothers 2007 Mercedes C220 Coupe which I'm sorely tempted to take on - but that would mean bidding farewell to the Avensis.  I can't do that.  So yes, I'm passing up a far better opportunity for peanuts because I'm a sentimental old fool.

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Just now, egg said:

I'm always interested when cars get to this mileage about how much of the suspension is original - has it had springs/dampers/bushes/arms etc?

As far as I know - it's not had anything at all.  Certainly not on my watch.  

The only bills I can remember were the clutch at 180k (2016) 2x timing belt/water pumps and a radiator when the original got a tiny pin hole at 230k.  It does really want a full exhaust pipe front to back at some stage, and I wouldn't be surprised if there's the tiniest of tiny leaks on the head gasket (cloudy residue on side of coolant bottle).  Otherwise it smells a bit of fuel on idle (likely a slightly leaky injector - possibly the cat) but otherwise it's great.

A cliché I know, but I'd take it anywhere.  

MOT is next month - I reckon it'll need the other front-back brake pipe doing in copper and a bit of luck with the emissions if the exhaust bodge isn't holding up.  Whatever it needs it will get so not really a concern.

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Spent 5 minutes thinking I was going completely mad before resorting to the google. 
EA702DD2-8544-491D-B9F3-00532C1CEDB5.thumb.jpeg.1886ae6072793170c5ad0c830b5f6b69.jpeg

 

Where the fuck is the washer fluid bottle! I ran it down because it smelt of sewerage, and thought I was cracking up trying to find the filler!

It can only be that - last time I had a Mk1 Clio - I never ever filled it up!

Clue for anyone wondering where the windscreen washer fluid goes in a MK 1 Clio? It’s by the firewall, under the plastic grille on the near side. The offside is where you’ll find the jack. Obviously.

French eh? 🙄

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Brainfarts ahoy.

I'm genuinely tired of having so many cars around the place at the moment.  I'm actually considering going straight, moving everything on other than the Mini and living a simple life.  If we have another year like this one, there'll be nowhere to go - nobody to see - nowhere to enjoy the cars - so they might as well be someone else's problem.

I count 3 of them as broken at the moment. 

  1. Mini really does need the welding now, and the MOT lapses next month
  2. Sierra MOT up in a few week's time and there's an annoying indicator issue AGAIN
  3. Granvia gearbox issue unresolved.  Needs a trip to the specialist really but if it's expensive it's going.

Then there's the Avensis which is still thundering on but has an MOT next month which I'm certain will require

  1. Rear brake pipe
  2. Exhaust fudgery

plus it's started leaking, and it gave me a wet arse last week. :mad:

 

My old dear has taken the very proactive and admirable stance to all but retire from driving at just 70.  Dad has stopped work now, they only need one car, and she's said I can take on her MB CL203.  It's mintola, low miles, well cared for etc.  Only problem is I really need a 5 seater somewhere on fleet and - with the Fiat 500c also here - replacing the Avensis with the C220 wouldn't work.

Dunno.  Maybe I'll feel brighter about things after a couple of MOT passes and a world that looks less weird. 

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On 9/25/2020 at 3:02 PM, BorniteIdentity said:

Clue for anyone wondering where the windscreen washer fluid goes in a MK 1 Clio? It’s by the firewall, under the plastic grille on the near side. The offside is where you’ll find the jack. Obviously.

The Cinquecento had it somewhere funky too. 

images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSbAkoVLW5YJB_LN-YRAEv

Tiny picture because Photobucket, but it's where the red arrow is above the offside headlight. 

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This week, for the first time ever, I felt old. I have sciatica which swaps from one side to the other, arthritis in one hand and what I think is the beginnings of IBS. On top of that it took me 2 weeks to remember a registration number that once would take me 2 seconds, and I forgot my parent's wedding anniversary.

I'm only 32.

Shit. No I'm not. I'm 33. I forgot that too. (Genuinely)

So, it's about time I committed some of my tales to paper. Well, a shonky server... but that's the best you can do in 2016.

First up, a list of the cars I've owned (as best as I can remember) in chronological order.

Main Cars
1985 VW Polo Formel E. C158 TRT. This was given to me even before I passed my test.

1991 Rover Metro S. J801 TAC. Bought about 3 months after I passed my test as I was convinced the Polo was about to shit its gearbox.

1987 Volvo 360 GLT. D899 CBJ ___ Managed three months in a Metro before the small car and smaller petrol tank became a bore.
IMG_4138.thumb.jpg.5cdb1302865c993b7f33e3ebc2604949.jpg


28343168063_aef51f330f_z.jpgFord Mondeo and Honda Civic Coupe by Bornite Identity, on Flickr
1999 Ford Mondeo Zetec. V384 DBJ. Still the most I've ever spent on a car. It was 3 years old and cost, from memory, about £8,000. Just think of the Rover R8s you could buy with that now!

28673944450_fed0905c87_z.jpg1987 Volkswagen Golf GTI 8v by Bornite Identity, on Flickr
1987 Volkswagen Golf GTI D79 CVV. I very nearly bought a MK1 Golf 1.1 but was persuaded, by my father amusingly, to buy this one from a different friend. From memory I gave about £500 for it, and sold it to some racers later that year for about £300. Amusingly, 16 year later I'd sell the Hartge wheels that came with the car for £530.

28927619766_5ab360b14f_h.jpg1999 Toyota Avensis CDX by Bornite Identity, on Flickr
1999 Toyota Avensis CDX. V781 GDP. By far the best car I've ever had. Bought in 2002 for £5300, it had previously been a company car at British Telecom. I ran it from 62,000 to 174,000 before it became surplus to requirements. A German chap bought it on ebay for about £500 and drove over to collect it. Hero.

28927664766_dcf93df335_z.jpg2001 Ford Mondeo Zetec by Bornite Identity, on Flickr
2001 Ford Mondeo Zetec. Y821 EEB. I should have loved this car. I gave £500 for it in 2008 which was stupidly cheap by anybody's standards. It needed 4 tyres (which actually was nice to pick good ones for once) and a coil spring. Sadly, it was just bill after bill after bill. I sold it and promised to never own another Ford. I nearly succeeded.

28674046270_cd0f083b0c_b.jpg1998 Nissan Almera by Bornite Identity, on Flickr
1998 Nissan Almera GX Auto. S58 NLO. My late Grandfather's car and, upon reflection, my first proper attempt at bangernomics. I bought it for £500 in 2008 from the estate and ran it for well over a year and 30,000 miles. It was also my first automatic which, whilst a bit dumb, did lock up into overdrive and give a good 36 mpg no matter how it was driven.

28855340172_8de43906a6_b.jpg2004 Ford Fiesta 1.25 LX and 2006 Ford Focus 2.0 Ghia by Bornite Identity, on Flickr
2004 Ford Fiesta Zetec. AG53 BWL. My wife's car which I ran for a couple of years when I bought her a Focus as a wedding gift.

28959548855_8bc77a5883_b.jpg2003 Rover 75 by Bornite Identity, on Flickr
2003 Rover 75 Club SE. AX53 BFA. This is where my career as a serial car buyer really began. Ignoring all of the warning signs I decided to press a K Series into a daily 100 mile commute, which it did with aplomb. This wasn't actually the car I set out to buy, the one I'd agreed to buy OVERHEATED ON THE FORECOURT whilst I was doing the paperwork. Consequently I couldn't leave fast enough and bought a different car later that day.

28343570193_39c619e654_b.jpg2004 Toyota Avensis T30-X by Bornite Identity, on Flickr
2004 Toyota Avensis T3-X. KT53 DWZ. Sensible head back on, I decided to get back into something I trusted when my 3rd son was born. This was a lovely car, but not without its problems. The VVTi oil burning issues are well documented and do frequently occur. Ironically, this was less reliable than the Rover it replaced! Despite fearing the worst and 3 months off the road, the new owner has just MOTd it.

28927903526_c82e81f214_b.jpg1999 Toyota Avensis SR by Bornite Identity, on Flickr
1999 Toyota Avensis SR. V263 GDP. Back into bangernomics territory again. The last MK1 Avensis I had was the best car I'd ever had, so I hoped to replicate it with another T22 Avensis. This one came up for sale in my favourite (and rare) colour with a numberplate sequential to my previous car - so it was meant to be. I still have this now, and tomorrow it will tick around to 185,000 miles having been bought by me at 100,500.

Side Bitches

28340942624_eb03d558b8.jpg1974 Morris Mini 1000 by Bornite Identity, on Flickr
1974 Morris Mini 1000. GEL 517N. Well, I always wanted one - and was young, free, single and well off at the time (2003). A memorable trip to buy it when I called my new girlfriend by my ex girlfriend's name 20 miles into a 200 mile weekend away. She's never forgiven or forgotten but we're still friends. Oh - and married.

28927768746_0b425ac038_z.jpg1977 Ford Capri II GL by Bornite Identity, on Flickr
1977 Ford Capri II 1600 GL. SMY 675R. I can't remember why I bought this, other than I thought it'd be amusing. It was bought from Norwich for £350 and was perfectly well behaved for the 8 months that I had it (other than a flasher unit expiring). I remember being shocked just how much the windscreen would ice up inside, and duly sold it in November to a guy who was going to drive it daily! It's still alive and now, apparently, black! (Update - it's now silver!!!)

28854977262_5a173cc0e4_z.jpg1989 Volvo 340 DL by Bornite Identity, on Flickr
1989 Volvo 340 DL. G67 AVN. I bought this for £80. Unbelievable. It was utterly bloody perfect. I wanted to do a banger rally which is why the guy gave it to me so cheap. I'm still yet to do that rally, but no longer have the car. I sold it for about £300 to a family who were clearly down on their luck who, I hope, still have the car.

28246436494_1a6b520b5c_b.jpg1996 Toyota Granvia by Bornite Identity, on Flickr
1996 Toyota Granvia. N775 JEV. My wife and I decided to increase our numbers further and, with our 4th son on the way, larger transport was required. We quickly realised you can either have 4 children and no apparel, or apparel and no children. After trying a very tired Mercedes Viano, the Granvia was found for 1/4 of the price and it's still here 2 years later. I can safely say that we'll never sell it - it really is another member of the family.

28674308470_791ed2a155_b.jpg1993 Mercedes 190e by Bornite Identity, on Flickr
1993 Mercedes 190e. L795 COJ. I've admired these cars since I was a child. In fact, one of the very few toy cars I still have from my childhood is a Mercedes 190e. Regular readers of "Memoirs from the Hard Shoulder" will know what a PITA this car has been since day 1, but I get the feeling it's a keeper. We'll see!

26427549733_4e56a0a2f6_h.jpg1983 Ford Sierra Base 1.6 by Bornite Identity, on Flickr
1983 Ford Sierra Base. GVG 510Y. Not explicitly my car, but it should be documented here for reference. Oh - and the V5 is in my name. The story is online for all to read as to how five of us acquired what is believed to be the only remaining Ford Sierra Base. Make a brew and read it, it's a fantastic story.

26425197603_cbaf075108_h.jpg1982 Ford Sierra L by Bornite Identity, on Flickr
1982 Ford Sierra L. LCR 503Y. I accidentally won this on ebay for £520. Upon reflection, I shouldn't have sold it - but short stop of saying I regret it. I could never get truly comfortable driving it and, in fairness, I could scratch my Sierra itch with the base if I wanted. Sold it at a stupid profit of £1250. It is believed to be the oldest remaining Ford Sierra in the UK.

28309364775_ece85920b4_h.jpg1979 Volvo 343 DL by Bornite Identity, on Flickr
1979 Volvo 343 DL. DBY 466T As you'll see above, I'd had a 360GLT as a younger lad and fancied one of these earlier cars. The variomatic is, frankly, terrible but amusing. This car has just 8000 miles on the clock and inside was absolutely timewarp. Sadly, the huge bill for the Mercedes 190e cylinder head rebuild meant I had to sell this car shortly after acquiring it. Since then I've had a bit of money luck, and now realise I didn't need to sell it after all. Typical.

I think that's it. My arthritis is playing up even more now. I've left out a few cars that were actually my wife's, but if I find pictures will add them in at a later date. I'll run this as an ongoing thread on cars and what's happening.

Current SitRep:

Purple Avensis: Just about to click over 185,000. Minor drama this week when an HT lead split but otherwise utterly fantastic, fantastically boring and boringly reliable.

Granvia: Just done 1000 miles in a month around Norfolk, 6 up with suitcases. 31mpg achieved on the way up which is good for an old tub with a 3.0 Turbo Diesel on board. ODO displaying 175,000 which is a mix of miles and kilometers. Say 130,000 miles for argument's sake.

Mercedes: Being a PITA. It's had the top end completely rebuilt after the chain came off. Now needs welding to pass another MOT and the gearbox bearings are on strike. It's about to go into the garage for winter until I can stomach it again. 151,000 miles on the clock.

Sierra bASe: Still on sabbatical with AngryDicky who only took it bloody camping in cornwall! Legend.

Just drunkenly raking up old posts.

I called the current (not first Mrs B by the original Mrs B’s name a year in same deal and ouch never forgotten.
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  • 2 weeks later...

Clio is out on loan at the moment with a neighbour who needed a car at short notice, or faced a week of commuting in the dark on bicycle.  It's a sad state of affairs, but I'd only ever lend out the best I have and this is it!  

1575480777_IMG_5888(1).thumb.jpeg.6f07a0129931c07cdf98bcfe2a3b6063.jpeg

I need to try harder in life.  Still, got new trims and a FW sticker, so it's not all shit.

The Sierra needs somewhere dry for the winter, and I'm out of ideas.  Mini has the garage (it has to be that way) and the Sierra will just deteriorate away if it's not looked after better than I already am.  With that in mind, if anyone has any undercover space and is willing to help out I'd be grateful to hear.

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