What's the worst car you could drive long distance?

[sierraman]

I borrowed a Transit Luton once that wouldn't go into 3rd gear, it was a hire removal van from a local place. I was only using it local. God forbid I went any distance in it.

[strangeangel]

The only thing that gets close to it's level of shite is a shitrun C15.

 

I always found the C15 mega comfortable on a run (if not fast). I once went to a gig in Brighton and back in a night - a 600 mile round trip from here - in mine and felt no ill effects at all.

 

The terrible seats and rock hard ride in Our Lass' Panda are guaranteed to leave you with permanent spinal damage after half an hour. No way would it FTP though.

[Aston Martin]

Cambridge to Hull in a Panda Selecta... in winter... with no radio... and no heater.

[danthecapriman]

Vauxhall Corsa C.

 

My dad had one 1.2 petrol, gutless little turd and the seats were utter wank, they weren't adjustable but needed to be. The steering wheel I found to then be at an uncomfortable position and that wasn't adjustable either. Most uncomfortable pile of shit ever.

Then I ended up with a Corsa C van 1.3cdti for work for a year or so. That was exactly the same but even more gutless than the petrol one.

The seats and seating position in these used to give me serious back and leg ache.

 

I thought I'd got away from the hateful shit piles after the C van set itself alight and was written off. Sometime later I had to borrow a Combo van (of the Corsa C shape) at work for a day while my Sprinter was in for service. I tried sitting in it and got straight out again and gave the keys back! Never again! I really really hate them.

[Lacquer Peel]

The Combo 1.3 CDTi is horrible to drive, you think it's quite peppy when it's on boost but it's mega laggy, worse than any old school turbo diesel. I didn't drive the one at work much but I had some scary moments pulling away from junctions.

[jonny69]

My dad suggested we drive my Ami the 500-odd miles to Le Mans. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

 

Then he suggested we did it in my Anglia HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

[MarvinsMom]

the nissan k12 i bought cheap off of my mam was terrible ti be in for anything longer than a couple of miles. 

 

horrid rock seats with no support at all, and a poor driving position,plus it was screaming its tits off at 60=70 mph. even the mini and the metro are quieter than that was on the motorway!

 

i'd drive down to work and be ready to commit mass-murder when i got where i was going. it wasn't even that economical either! but you could be sure that it would get you to your destination, though i would be bent in two and have a tingle in my hands plus have a monster head ache.

 

plus the other half's little gay suzi vitara is pretty uncomfortable. anything longer than an hour driving it and my right buttock is killing me. the way the accelerator is placed means that my right leg ends up at a slightly raised position, causing the crippling arse cramp. and its 2.5 to 3 hours from work to home.....

[Supernaut]

Y'know what, seeing as I'm not on certain 'other' car forums that wank themselves blind over MX-5s, I'll say this...

 

My MX-5 was an utter cunt for long-distance driving, and I'm a short-arse at about 5'7". Space wasn't the issue, the fact it pulled 3.5k RPM at 70mph was, and the wind noise from, well, everywhere.

Don't get me wrong, it was brilliant for spirited driving, but just going from place A to place B was horrible if it was more than 30 miles or so.

 

I'm really loving the fact that the Omega is completely un-sporty. I think that's going to be my style from now on.

[Pete-M]

Actually. The Escort was pretty bloody awful across Europe. Especially when the coil was playing up and the PCV sealed with a bung.

 

5000 rpm @ 80 mph just added to the misery.

[twosmoke300]

Citroen zx 1.9 d - flat as piss on a spoon so constant gear changing in hilly cornwall / Devon .

And seats that seem super comfy for 10 mins then become torture devices . My previous mk4 escort 1.6d was better in every respect

[HH-R]

Once had a Vectra C 2.0 DTi Estate as a pool car, that would cut the throttle if you tried to accelerate hard, only fix was turn engine off for a few secs and then turn it back on! Interesting when you are in the outside lane of the A34. 

 

Is that not a fault? My Dad's 2.2 did the same, but put on the EML and went into limp home mode. As you say, a good laugh* when overtaking.

[Captain Slow]

Fiat X1/9. I'm 6'2", long legged, and just over 15 stone. Do I need to provide any further explanation?

[HH-R]

Every long journey I've ever made have been in things wholly unsuited to it, K11 Micra, Rover 25, Rover 45, Fiat Panda, Mitsubishi Colt. Not that I'd doubt they'd get there, but they're all high revving petrols with little to no sound insulation (thanks, project drive) so a three hour journey seems like a 10 hour one with tinnitus from hell.

[purplebargeken]

2003 Smart For2 Passion. The Roundabout Fear was mighty, the suspension was so fucking hard you felt evry road imperfection. Even driving over a postage stamp was painful. Miserable shit bastard thing. 

[Matt]

I found this German registered (South of Berlin!) UAZ 469 in Scotland. Not a journey I am envious of.

 

UAZ 469 by MattLikesCars, on Flickr

 

This was parked nearby, support vehicle?

Suzuki WagonR+ by MattLikesCars, on Flickr 

[anonymous user]

I would not have wanted to go on a long journey in the Bond Bug, I didn't even like driving it up to the shop. I now understand why people say never meet your heros.

[Timewaster]

Toyota Avensis with a dent in the door.

 

Totally unacceptable on all levels.

 

 

[Supernaut]

2003 Smart For2 Passion. The Roundabout Fear was mighty, the suspension was so fucking hard you felt evry road imperfection. Even driving over a postage stamp was painful. Miserable shit bastard thing.

I distinctly remember, a few years ago, driving down the A90 (NSL dual carriageway) south of Aberdeen and seeing a Smart For2 bobbing along like it was head-banging to some death metal at about 60mph in the inside lane. I almost wet myself laughing at it. Very short wheelbase and very hard suspension = NOPE.

[barrett]

My dad suggested we drive my Ami the 500-odd miles to Le Mans. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

I know I bang on about them all the time but I reckon Amis are one of the best long-distance touring cars out there. Nice 70mph cruise in the most comfortable seats of all time, super supple ride, loads of leg room, perfect driving position... what more do you need?

[scruff]

Some memorable Land rover mongathons for yours truly include:

 

Peterborough - Bannegon (France) - Peterborough in a series 2a V8 on soft springs with a heavy roof tent on top. No problems bar total loss of all lighting, cured by wigging the bundle of taped up wires under the dash.

 

Wellingboro - Kutna Hora (CZ) - Stamford. Series 2a with 62bhp 2.25 diesel; flat out at approx 64.2mph. Due to time constraints, did the Hook of Holland to Kutna Hora in one hit stopping only for fuel. No problems - and was in convoy with a Series 3 that had not been further than the local tip (.5 of a mile) for the last decade.

 

Lincoln - Ruffec (France). Series 3 109 safari with a Sherpa 2.5 diesel engine, towing a brand new Series 3 SWB galvanised chassis on a A-bar. Total disaster. Broke an injector pipe at Bishops Stortford; Blew head gasket on M20; Took head off in Travelodge car park and found it was cracked; fitted a 2.25 head a mate brought out (major error); got on ferry 24 hours late; blew a glow plug out of the head south of Paris; finally lunched the bottom end about 100ks from our destination. LR abandoned at friendly tractor dealers; load saved by our pal and his Partner van; Sped back to Calais in his R5 "SuperCinq"; boarded the ferry with some Romanian bare knuckle fighters in a Audi 80 TD as they wouldn't let any more foot passengers on; Picked up from Dover by a mate in his 110 which burst a coolant pipe on the M25.

 

Worthing - Ruffec (France) - Peterborough. The rescue mission for the above. 1955 Series 1 soft top with no heater, one wiper, but a tuned Discovery Tdi engine and high ratio transfer box. Loaded with three people and a minty replacement ex-Army 2.5 diesel engine for the stricken safari, it would cruise at 80mph all day but it was pissing with rain and the roof leaked. Spent two days changing the engine - prolonged by a total fuck up by inadvertadly locking up the vacuum pump and seizing the camshaft... - then drove both back.... uneventful, thankfully.

 

Rutland - Swiss alps - Rutland. 1952 Series 1 with 57bhp or whatever they are 2 litre petrol engine, no heater, no overdrive, dynamo electrics etc etc. First real journey for over 30 years and first time ever on a motorway, on a ferry and on foreign soil. No problems at all, bar troublesome shit in the fuel tank - cured by lopping a few mm off the pick up pipe in the tank.

 

Lincoln - Ruffec - Lincoln. Same 109 as the one that blew up, but now running well and towing a BFO box trailer loaded with most of a SWB Series 2 and two brand new chassis for some french blokes. 5 seats filled with people, load bed filled with tools and spare injector pipes. Cruising speed 55mph. No problems.

 

Rutland - Ruffec. V8 Stage 1 109 delivery to a pal. Went OK but made the massive error of running it out of LPG and discovering it ran like a one legged donkey on petrol. Flew back on Ryanair like a playa

 

Rutland - Kutna Hora CZ - Rutland. '52 S1 again, this time with Perkins Prima power. Popped a radiator hose off in rush hour Brussels traffic jam and the Britpart clutch fell to bits somewhere in holland, leading to clutchless shifts for the rest of the 900 odd miles covered.

 

Loads more but in summary Land Rovers are shit but usually get you home.

[lesapandre]

Any big capacity engined monster - try it in a Jensen Interceptor or Jaguar XJ12 - you will end up selling your watch and shoes just to keep the tank full. Anything with single-digit consumption will mean you probably won't atrtive without spending all your savings and then selling your house to get 1000 miles.

[Bamboocarman]

A yellow Mk 1 Escort 1.1. company pool car; tedious, uninspiring nothingness.

[Pete-M]

Any big capacity engined monster - try it in a Jensen Interceptor or Jaguar XJ12 - you will end up selling your watch and shoes just to keep the tank full. Anything with single-digit consumption will mean you probably won't atrtive without spending all your savings and then selling your house to get 1000 miles.

I did 2200 miles around Europe in an XJR. It averaged 24 mpg.

[New POD]

I remember driving my old mk2 cavalier 1.8e SRi to a car show at billingham, northhants.

 

2.5 hours in the driving seat.

 

I couldn't actually walk afterwards.

 

But the Mx5 is horrible now I've fitted the pointless none standard stainless exhaust. I still have the old one. Might put it back.

[New POD]

 

My MX-5 was an utter cunt for long-distance driving, and I'm a short-arse at about 5'7". Space wasn't the issue, the fact it pulled 3.5k RPM at 70mph was, and the wind noise from, well, everywhere.

Don't get me wrong, it was brilliant for spirited driving, but just going from place A to place B was horrible if it was more than 30 miles or so.

 

 

 

They are nicer with top down.

[overrun]

If you mean fun cars, then I reckon a mk2  MR2 Turbo.

Mine may be part of a #LADS Euro drive, this year. But the tank is tiny, it has no cruise control, shit-slow windows, bad wind noise and is always waiting to kill you.

 

Although any MR2 would be arse.

Not ideal.

[HH-R]

I've got this dilemma coming up soon: 600 mile round trip with the choice of a 1.4 Kia Rio, a 1.4 Fiat Punto Evo, a Bini of unknown Bininess and another Bini diseasel.

 

What would you choose? The Rio (mine) is the oldest but has the biggest boot, 5 doors and did 47 MPG on the last long run I took it on, 4 up. 4 six foot blokes can get in it OK, maybe feel a bit sorry for the one sitting behind me driving though.

The Punto is my mate's and he said he'd trust me to drive it, ditto I'd trust him to drive mine but it's not that far so I'd prob just do it myself. It's a 1.4 petrol so probably similar on fuel but I'd be happier driving my own car in case I crash it and owe him a car, and it's a 3 door. I have a feeling the pull of being able to plug an iPod in and not having to listen to my Brenda Russell/Belinda Carlisle CDs or the radio on my ancient head unit will pull towards this one.

Unknown Bini - have a feeling the owner will veto this one anyway.

Diseasel Bini - most economical but I don't fit in them, neither does my mate, the driver will want to drive the most out of us all (which I'm happy to allow).

[dollywobbler]

Citroen zx 1.9 d - flat as piss on a spoon so constant gear changing in hilly cornwall / Devon .

And seats that seem super comfy for 10 mins then become torture devices . My previous mk4 escort 1.6d was better in every respect

What is point of gearchanges? With an unblock XUD, more revs just means more noise. My BXs just loped around the hills here in fifth gear.

[djimbob]

A lot of these tales involve broken vehicles - any car is a fucking pain if in the height of summer and the heating is jammed on red hot, or the bastard cuts out every ten miles and needs half an hour to recover etc.. - I'd do big miles in a fully restored Allaggro Van den Plas if I had confidence in it's ability to get me where I was going without the usual FTP issues they developed over the years, they are a nice ride when set up well - but find a good one now less than £4k!

 

I think the OP is talking about highly unsuitable vehicles for a Grand tour - take your pick from Microcars, old stuff like Mini's (hateful after approx quarter of a mile if that), generally small and under specced vehicles I would suggest.

 

Obvious big wins are luxo barges designed for exactly this kind of journey, the GT badge should be a help when choosing a motorway miles muncher

[Junkman]

I always thought, I can drive anything over any distance and often did so with the most unlikey chod.

This included driving a Morgan from Andorra to Munich, a DKW Munga from Berlin to Salzburg, in Winter, and a chopped '32 Ford hot rod from Las Vegas to Kansas City,

in a permadownpour.

Those were the relatively pleasant ones. More unpleaseant was a trip with a Datsun 120Y from Munich to the North Cape, then to Sicily, and back to Munich.

The very trip was later repeated with a Citroen 15/6 and it made all the difference. Something I won't repeat ever is driving a BMW 528 from Munich to Kano in Nigeria.

In fact, the only vehicle I'd use for that trip now, is a D-16 Caterpillar.

Also terminally shit was a trip with a Renault 4 from Salta in Argentina to Antofagasta in Chile, but I don't think that was the poor little Renner's fault, it held up admirably.

Furthermore, I found any trip in an open convertible unbearably atrocious and if it was just down to the shops.

 

But this was all nothing, nothing at all, compared with a week long 500km round trip in a hired Opel Corsa B in ca. 1990 East Germany.

Ten more kilometres and I'd have pissed blood.