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Automotive bull5hit facts thread


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3 hours ago, Parky said:

The engines also lasted a long time if the owner was an average sized man as normal sized feet never achieved full throttle pedal travel.  However clutches went with alarming regularity for the same reason and 106’s were the most likely car to rear end you in traffic.

can confirm, owned a phase 1 106 XRD AGED 17 and managed to arse rape a fiesta. and them munt a xsara due to size 13 feet and mashing all pedals. did lol. 

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1 minute ago, stuboy said:

vauxhall engineered the squeak in operating the clutch pedal as engine so quiet it reminded you it was still running

Like all good design teams they recorded the squeaks in the clutches of all thier rivals, and played recordings to 1000s of their target audience and asked them to pick the nicest.  Kind of like Mazda did with the exhaust  sounds of the Mx5.

Like all shit ideas, they even fucked that up, because they didn't have any calibration for the actual level of the sound, so the noises from most of the cars actually sounded really quiet, but when the CD was compiled and sent out, they came out very loud.  The one chosen was in fact not a clutch but a recording of an MX5 door hinge after it had spent 15 year in the sea, and there was a fault with the microphone which was placed in the sea before recording it.

Also Ironic, because most of the rear arches on most Vauxhalls look like they were welded in sea water. 

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During the 1990s the south east region of ITV ran a fleet of Peugeot 306 staff cars which gave rise to their ‘Meridian’ limited edition, with special seat fabric made from Geoff Clarke’s discarded suits and a sunroof with horizontal lines representing Dinenage’s combover

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Given the recent slew of retro styled EVs announced recently, such as the new Renault 5, Tesla has decided to get in on the game.

They’ve acquired the rights to the styling of the Horsey Horseless and an electric version is due for release sometime in 2024, based on the chassis of their Model X.

The top of the range Pegasus edition is to have the rear gullwing doors of the Model X repurposed to resemble actual wings.

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The K-Series was designed by the same team who designed the O500/510 series in the early 1970s. Learning from their mistake of having the headless engine for heavy trucks, a head gasket would be used this time. However as development money was tight the head gasket in the prototype was made from a roll of discarded lino as a stopgap which proved to be better than the production gasket.

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On 2/1/2021 at 9:49 PM, anonymous user said:

Just reading the thread on limited edition cars reminded me that, following the success of VW in naming cars after famous rock bands, New Holland tried it.

Unfortunately their Wurzel Combine Harvester was a failure, as they hadn't taken into account that farmers would be too tight to pay any extra, even if the special model did have a cider chilling cabinet.

Further to this, the salesman would only hand over the keys to a brand new combine harvester to the farmers girlfriend, not to the farmer himself.

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commer called their truck the commer knocker, as it was the first truck to be driven by a lady with massive cans. 

 

there are 2 cars mentioned in the bible - leviticus 2:13 - "and the lord said this is my accord badermatic in beige"  and JOHN 4:23 "and jesuses death was brought with a herald, in dogshit brown, with a fucked 1300cc engine. and the lord proclaimeth " it doth need a rebore, and a head gasket, for that is my commandment" and then it was recovered by Big Ern from 3-ways recovery"

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On 01/02/2021 at 23:44, Ghosty said:

Princess Anne was made of fibreglass, you know.

Her hair certainly is.  She only discovered the Reliant Scimitar because Tamworth's premier manufacturer of metallurgically-challenged variable-wheeled motor vehicles was awarded the Royal Warrant to supply her barnet.

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33 minutes ago, sierraman said:

The Aussie singer Tina Arenas 90’s Hit ‘Chains’ was written about her concern about timing belts and her belief in the duplex chains fitted to various German machinery. In fact for the Singapore market it was release with the title ‘Timing Chains’

Tina's other single 'Sorrento Moon' was about the time she saw some bogan dropping his trousers in public  and waving his arse while standing on the roof of a Kia 4x4. 

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The Chrysler 180™ model name was invented by French darts champion Erique Bristeau who worked as a freelance car-name inventor at the time. 

In 1969 he sold the model name 'Bullseye' to Lamborghini although they haven't used it yet.  In the late 1980s he sold '45' and '75' to Rover.  'Double-Six' was sold to Daimler.  Fiat reserved a short batch in 1966 - from '124' to  '133'.

He still has a wide variety of model names in stock and for sale including '61', 'Treble-Twenty', and '15'.

'15' was loaned to Renault in 1971 but when the seven-year lease ran out in 1978 they had to stop making them, or call it something different.

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The Ford model name 'Super' was invented by celebrity Jim Bowen when he worked briefly for Ford in 1959.  First used on the 105E Anglia, Jim received a 1p royalty for every 'Super' badge made.

There was a bit of an altercation in 1961 between Jim and some Rootes-group officials when they announced the new Hillman Super Minx, a fight broke out in a pub car-park and he allegedly called them 'thieving wassocks', but they all became friends later.

Other model names invented by Mr. Bowen were 'Smashing' and 'Great', although (so far) they appear to have gone unused by Ford who still own the rights.

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12 hours ago, JeeExEll said:

The Ford model name 'Super' was invented by celebrity Jim Bowen when he worked briefly for Ford in 1959.  First used on the 105E Anglia, Jim received a 1p royalty for every 'Super' badge made.

There was a bit of an altercation in 1961 between Jim and some Rootes-group officials when they announced the new Hillman Super Minx, a fight broke out in a pub car-park and he allegedly called them 'thieving wassocks', but they all became friends later.

Other model names invented by Mr. Bowen were 'Smashing' and 'Great', although (so far) they appear to have gone unused by Ford who still own the rights.

Despite everything Jim did for Ford, they wouldn’t lend him a car so he always had his bus fare home.

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In other news, Caterham are about to launch a new EV kit car with technical support from Tamiya.  

Cars will be sold through a revolutionary new distribution network of model and hobby shops, initially in two trims, Grasshopper and Hornet.  Customers can specify RS380:or RS540 power plants but are advised not to drive too close to other similar models in case their crystals are both preset to the same frequency.

Battery life is expected to be around 15 minutes although the prototype was destroyed in crash testing.  The tester, Jamie (aged 9) said it had stood up to the kerb test well but sadly his Dad had reversed his Vitara over it.

It is currently being rebuilt by the technical team operating out of a bright yellow van with “Vanessas Lunchbox” on it

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12 hours ago, JeeExEll said:

The Chrysler 180™ model name was invented by French darts champion Erique Bristeau who worked as a freelance car-name inventor at the time. 

In 1969 he sold the model name 'Bullseye' to Lamborghini although they haven't used it yet.  In the late 1980s he sold '45' and '75' to Rover.

He still has a wide variety of model names in stock and for sale including '61', 'Treble-Twenty', and '15'.

Erique Bristeau.  That’s just absolute genius.  Always enjoyed watching him play Jean L’eau

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Some people know that early VW Beetles had a reserve petrol tap in place of a fuel gauge and that this feature made a reappearance in the late 1960s for the economy 1200A models. Few, however, know that an even cheaper model was proposed where even the reserve tap was considered an extravagance. These models were to be supplied with a laminated card in the door pocket with the phrase "Could you help me push my car" in nineteen European languages. 

The proposal was rejected when it was discovered that the 1200A did not have any door pockets.

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NAC MG UK Ltd secretly hired the Ricardo automotive engineering consultancy at great cost to thoroughly review the TF prior to restarting production, to ensure that all the original design flaws which had gradually been eliminated over the previous decade were painstakingly reintroduced to guarantee that authentic 1996 ownership experience for lucky purchasers of the LE500.

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Bedford, as a marque, started out by camper converting Ford vans, hence the name:  Bed-Ford.  Thereafter, once they had enough capital to do so, they designed their own vehicles, both campers and normal vans and shortened the name to Bedford.  They extended their market to include many other vehicles, but never lost sight of their initial market, selling campervans (although often through specialist converters) right up until the end.

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After fighting at length with a striped deckchair on a windy Folkestone beach, the owner of a new Bedford CA was hit by inspiration when frustratingly throwing the deckchair in the back to be dealt with at a later date.  This owner realised that the inside of his new shiny van wasn't that far off the porportions of his own cottage.  Excitedly, he hurtled home to put his plan in action, dismantling the deckchair and taking a can opener to the roof of his van.  The resulting contraption gained him the nickname of Dormer Bill due to the distinctive shape the deckchair's frame lent to the roof extension on his home away from home.  Bedford were so taken with the idea that they worked with Bill for many years.  Bill's son, Tor, would also go into this new family business and they maintained a friendly rivalry for many years.

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In 1972, an error by British Leylands canteen saw 2 million tins of oxtail soup being ordered.  This was too much for the loyal, diligent hard working men of the plant who wanted chicken, thus triggering a series of disputes which are synonymous with the company and it’s eventual downfall.

The soup however wasn’t wasted as it was used to dye the carpets of the soon to be launched Princess model.  The empty tins were used to make Marinas.

The Allegro Super was originally going to be the Allegr Souper, but marketing swapped the ‘o’ about as they thought it would boost sales.  

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in June 1974 in Canada a baby girl was born in the back seat of a car.  The cars owner, Alan and his neighbours, the parents-to-be had set out for the hospital in Alan's Morris Minor.  However, after a tortuous journey involving galloping rot that shrank the car and knackered lever arm dampers, the girl was born before they got to the hospital.

Overjoyed at their new arrival, the parents offered to name the girl after Alan, he declined and suggested that they name it after his now (completely wrecked and much smaller) transport, a compromise was reached.  We know the child now as Alanis Morrisette.

Alan's other car was a 'Ford Irritating Whiney Bitch', which was 'Ironic, don'cha think..?'

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On 2/12/2021 at 7:15 AM, sierraman said:

The Aussie singer Tina Arenas 90’s Hit ‘Chains’ was written about her concern about timing belts and her belief in the duplex chains fitted to various German machinery. In fact for the Singapore market it was release with the title ‘Timing Chains’

Interestingly Italian singer Sabrina Claudio had a hit with “Orions Belt” which she wrote following an order cock up by ECP when she ordered an air filter for her diesel Passat.

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In 1969 Roy Haynes was working for Morris designing a Escort Mk1 rival.  Haynes had a fascination with one particular Gerry Anderson tv series which was around at the time and wanted to call the new car the 'Morris Stingray'.  Both Gerry Anderson and General Motors strongly objected.

He suggested an alternative, the dynamic sounding 'Morris Troy-Tempest', but this met with similar objections, particularly from GM Pontiac.

The 'Morris Anderson' suggestion failed to raise much interest.

Eventually Haynes found a compromise and Morris ended up paying 5p to Gerry Anderson for every one of the new models made.

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In 1980, in a desperate attempt to cut costs, BL renamed the car 'Ital' to save on royalty expenses, and life for Gerry Anderson was never quite the same after that.  He was allowed to keep his 1979 coupe forever though, previously part of a new-car-every-year concession agreed in 1971.

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