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Stuff fitted to your car that you never seem to use


warren t claim

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The bluetooth system: If you don't sync your phone to the car, then every-time you start the car she says "accoppiare l'apparecchio" Which is "Pair the device" Because it's Fiat they assume only Italians would buy the car...

 

The bluetooth system is rubbish anyway and I like the sound of an Italian woman every-time I set off on a miserable journey.

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I never use cruise control if a car has it fitted.

 

 

The bluetooth system: If you don't sync your phone to the car, then every-time you start the car she says "accoppiare l'apparecchio" Which is "Pair the device" Because it's Fiat they assume only Italians would buy the car...

 

The bluetooth system is rubbish anyway and I like the sound of an Italian woman every-time I set off on a miserable journey.

 

Excellent - can we all hear her please?

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The Daimler has lots of toggle switches that operate lights and stuff.

The Astra has a hidden message screen that is reached by pressing some stuff,this shows the engine temp and other things.I found it once can't remember how.

The X-trail has lots of acronyms like esp or sumthin and buttons with wavy lines.

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The bluetooth system: If you don't sync your phone to the car, then every-time you start the car she says "accoppiare l'apparecchio" Which is "Pair the device" Because it's Fiat they assume only Italians would buy the car...

 

The bluetooth system is rubbish anyway and I like the sound of an Italian woman every-time I set off on a miserable journey.

Wish my Rover had this, the midlands accent always make me smile.

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There's a button on my Merc that apparently switches the Tilt Alarm off, so if you get the car towed away it won't alarm.What is the fxcking point in that? It the Nazi bastards are going to impound the car they can have the alarm going off all night as far as I'm concerned! Therefore I've never pressed it!

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Downforce?

 

I can turn the motion sensor off on the alarm on both my cars, apparently useful if you leave children or dogs in the car. But then the manual states never leave children or animals unattended in the car. WHICH IS IT?

 

Also, if I have aircon, I use aircon. Without fail, when above 20 degrees. Can't see the point in not using it.

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Never really one a full spec car. Corsa had sweet fa fitted,punto I obviously used windows. Xsara had no working ac but apart from windows that's it. Vectra is even less well equipped but I do need to sort out the remote locking. When I pop to a mates house I always go outside for a smoke so leave fags in car. Trouble is I have to walk into road to unlock door as no lock on passenger side.

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Day driving LEDs aka vajazzle lights. These got switched off as soon as I could find the right part of the manual.

 

We call them Dame Edna's (as in - looks like the frames of her specs) - esp. the ones on Audis.

 

 

Also, can I nominate hands-free phone kits in 4x4's - they never seem to get bothered with round here, I mean, why would you when you can easily hold the phone in your hand? You don't need both hands to drive after all.

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My son had a BX a while back.  When he bought it, I told him not to fiddle with the suspension ride height lever.  He ignored the advice, and while demonstrating the up and down capability to friends it blew a pipe and dumped LHM on the drive.  In my CX, I never touched the ride height lever (never had a puncture or drove through deep floods) and never had LHM pissage problems. 'Don't touch' is not quite the same as 'fitted but not used' but the factory fitted burglar alarm in my Pug 205 has a big red button on the dash.  I daren't press it in case it reformats the loom or something.  It may even make loud noises.  

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My son had a BX a while back. When he bought it, I told him not to fiddle with the suspension ride height lever. He ignored the advice, and while demonstrating the up and down capability to friends it blew a pipe and dumped LHM on the drive. In my CX, I never touched the ride height lever (never had a puncture or drove through deep floods) and never had LHM pissage problems. 'Don't touch' is not quite the same as 'fitted but not used' but the factory fitted burglar alarm in my Pug 205 has a big red button on the dash. I daren't press it in case it reformats the loom or something. It may even make loud noises.

Have to say the height lever was one of the most frequently used bits on my xm! I used to park it at the front of the office car park if i was in early and wack it in high! Got a few comments tbh.

 

If I parked next to a pineappled vag id sink it right down, was fun the weekend we went to peterborough and the vagfest was on at the showground, was a fun night in the travelodge that night, had random (friendly) people wanting to sit in whilst we went up and down. Then the receptionist came out as ai had to bump the idle up going up as the pump couldnt keep up!

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We call them Dame Edna's (as in - looks like the frames of her specs) - esp. the ones on Audis.

 

 

Also, can I nominate hands-free phone kits in 4x4's - they never seem to get bothered with round here, I mean, why would you when you can easily hold the phone in your hand? You don't need both hands to drive after all.

 

 

I call them vajazzle lights as they are sparkly and highlight the presence of a twat.

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Mother Ghosty's 'don't use' list on the Bini:

 

-radio

-fog lights

-horn

-boot (she uses the back seat?)

-external boot release

-trip computer

-the toggle that closes the fan vents, she just points them at the window instead

-manual shift mode on autobox

-Bluetooth

-aux in (though I do)

-glovebox

-secret compartment about the glovebox

-the full reach of the accelerator pedal

-heated rear window

 

She pretty much uses the gear lever, handbrake, fan, pedals, indicators and steering wheel.

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