Jump to content

Wombles Wheels - C3 Picasso its Boxy... But meh!

Recommended Posts

In more "Im having no fucking luck whatsoever with my wheels"


Picked up a puncture, wheels on car are alloys, spare is a steel. Different wheel bolt sizes. 


Its also pissing it down and blowing a gale. So what happened? Yup - one of my bolts is seized solid and 22 stone of Northerner later I ripped the head off teh stock Citroen wheel brace.

When I eventually freed it off using the universal wheel brace out of the wifes car, I then discovered the bottle jack wouldn't lift the car high enough. So I pumped it up and prayed it held air whilst I drove the 15 miles to my mothers house to collect the aged trolley jack.


Copper faced hammer for obligatory twatting of alloy corroded to hub. Discovered two of the three wheels I picked up last week are not holding air. Fuckity fuck fuck.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Took the FM to Knowsley today ( Midweek its £10 a car in June) and of course because i dont really give a shit about it we took it through the baboon enclosure.


On trip one we lost the rear washer jet, fuck knows why but  I remember the little bastards eating the one of the Zafira many years ago. Today they seemed more interested in this Stilo...




Then this little fucker ripped my rear wiper off on trip 2...



Normally I wouldnt be too arsed but the remains of the wiper arm seems welded to the splines on the car, because its fitted to the glass I cant knock fuck out of it nor apply lots of heat. So its plus gas galore and still no movement so far.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • 2 weeks later...

This arrived quite quickly from Hong Kong Henry for £6 delivered ( how do they do it?) and it galvanised me into getting the old arm off - Mr Hacksaw was employed and finally the old arm gave up its grip on the spindle showering me in ally corrosion dust.



The washer jets are more than I feel comfortable paying so it can FRO if it thinks its being replaced.


Link to post
Share on other sites
  • 2 weeks later...
In other news - Three, two or one and a PTW?
Financially I hink we need to tighten our belts, Dunno for definite but Joannes 
sanity cant stand childminding much longer which means an income cut. Not a huge biggie, but looking to see where we can reduce outgoings, number one would be the car. Currently I have three sat on the driveway and another one SORNEd elsewhere. The Micra which is SORN but which James wants to learn to drive in (assuming he can with autism) Joannes C8 and the Picasso. Now I know the Picasso needs some work, it rattles like a junkie 6 hours after their last hit and the gearbox is fucking awful, its like stirring thick porridge. That aside its OK, fits us all in and does oodles to the gallon.

The C8, 
despite sudden appearance of a bubble this week in the paintwork, is a keeper for now, I want another 2 years out of it. The Micra is getting rusty as fuck below the waist and needs welding, The Picasso needs bushes galore. So Im wondering if I get rid of both the Micra and Picasso and buy something like Micks 306 (You spawny get) for daily and teenage L plate duties, or sack off the second car altogether and get another motorbike. I do like the Picasso though.

Ideally we could do with 2 cars,
butits a big expense. That said we spend more on food for 5 of us a year than we do on transport, so perhaps stopping eating (or shitting, Im sure my kids eat toilet paper we go through it so fast).
Link to post
Share on other sites



Whilst Im off work with a leg the size of Barry White I decided to chuck the FM in for some work on the clattery suspension - one new pair of ARB links fitted later and it waltzed through an MOT with no advisories. The more eagle eyed amongst you might notice it wasnt due for a couple of months but I decided to get it done today whilst I have time on my hands and the car can be off the road if it needs to be. So quite pleased with that result, will keep the FM for a while longer, might even stuff my own plates on it, but they can wait til insurance renewal time as Kwik F**k will charge me £30 or £40 for the "paperwork" change mid term, so they can FRO.

Drives a lot nicer now. Not that Ive driven it with my wonky knee officer. Not at all.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • 2 months later...

So, new additions to the fleet:


fitted with a 200cc Douglas donkey (125 on the V5 though), this fits rather nicely in the man cave and will be a fair weather friend and enables me to scratch that "I need to buy something but have nowhere to put it" itch having flogged the Hornby Thomas trains on eBay for £270.


for my son.



and the second bloody screw I have picked up in the rear wheels of the Womble Waggon  - fortunately it was in the middle of the tread so £5 worth of Mo's puncture repair and Im on my way again.

Its also grumbling from the gearbox when on hard left had lock for some reason and the "slight judder" in reverse is getting progressively worse I think its really going to need a new flywheel to cure that the clutch has done about 10K.

Though next year it should be getting swapped for the ex-Father_Womble Polo with its heated leather and pitiful mileage which will be very very cheap. That will or course be fun trying to transport the water vehicles ( above) about as they will be rather longer than the car. I may have to get a canoe trailer. I'll see how they fit in the meantime before splashing out, they may strap securely to the front & rear towing eyes.



Link to post
Share on other sites
  • 3 weeks later...

Could do with something cheap shitty and 2 wheeled to use for the next 2 years a couple of times a week.

I'm doing a degree now at the local Polytech ( taken me 25 years to do one) and I either have the option of getting up at stupid o'clock and parking a mile away in Plungie for free  then sitting in the classroom giving the cleaners a surprise, or paying £5 at the local scambastard car park.

That and driving into Preston these days is enough to give me a nosebleed ( and students too, all young and in their shiny BINI's and shit).

I don't want to risk the Vespa, its defo a fair weather bike anyway so Im on the lookout for something sub £500.


Either daily is a bit lardy for convenient on street parking these days



Spied this today on the way home - a MG Magnette no less. 

Expect this to be firmly on the Autoshite radar very soon



Bought another kayak - this one is a twin cockpit example to fit my fat arse in - and on that front two weeks at Slimming world and Im down 10lbs so far. 


Whilst the knee is still decidedly buggered Ive lobbed this in the shed


to do a bit more lard shifting - and with it being in the shed no one can laugh at the jiggle that occurs when I give it some beans on the pedals.

Link to post
Share on other sites
The Picasso currently has just three forward gears, and two of those are reluctant to engage.


Much pissing about with greasing the linkage cables has made the square root of feck all difference.


Driving is "entertaining" at the moment. Especially where reverse action is concerned.

Link to post
Share on other sites

Well with a quote of £372.47 for two new selector cables supplied and fitted I think its time to part company with the Fanny Magnet.


Good Points:


  • MOT until July 2016
  • White
  • Four newish tyres on Alloy wheels ( front - Michelins, rear some Chinese Snow tyres)
  • Cheapish road tax
  • 2.0 HDi nuns & kittens killing diesel with Stage 1 tuning kit ( see first post with youTube video of dyno test) Dynoed at 117BHP then got a new clutch because that one was slipping so likely putting out a shade more.
  • Decatted ( for even more Nuns & kittens killing ability)
  • Blanked off & deleted EGR ( no error lights and MOAR nuns & kittens killerbility)
  • Not charged for on tip runs
  • New clutch last year
  • Timing belt done at 100K
  • lift pump replaced
  • battery replaced
  • starter motor replaced
  • Oil & filters when I got it and Service not due for 6000 miles or so.
  • It has a working air con button ( just dont expect working air con)
  • It has a highly desirable and limited edition Arnold Clarke /Autoshite sticker and the WBOD stamp.
  • Its actually fairly clean inside and not sticky.
  • Alloy wheels including not one but TWO spares (also alloys)
  • Fire extinguisher in the boot.
  • New drop links quite recently.

Bad points


  • Gear selector cables have the typical Bingo/Picasso fault that they are fucked and selecting gears is a challenge- can be done, and gets easier the warmer it is outside which is why i'm confident that its the cables and not the box.
  • wont come with a radio as its a DAB unit I bought for my birthday ( it didnt come with one when I bought it) but takes a standard DIN and ISO radio. If (and its a big If) I can find something then I'll lob it in the dash.
  • Its a Picasso so everyone will think you are a single mum/ fat slipper wearing chav / Jeremy Kyle reject.
  • You will have no self respect if you drive this.

Its located just South of Preston in easy reach of the M6 / M61 / M55 and M65 motorways, its drivable ( I drove it to the Canoe Club then to the Lakes then home then to work and back with the gears like they are - some 300 miles) 

I will include a Fray Bentos pie for the buyer and tea / biscuit / toilet facilities. Would like £300 ( £150 ish is the rubber and spare alloy)

Link to post
Share on other sites

Micrashed Dead!


Well technically not until the 20th October - But it came back from the garage with its tail between its legs - PHAIL ( see pic)


Anyone want a Micrashed?

1.0 Profile, 67K, serviced, decent rubber ( no stereo thats my sons  but has extra speakers in back shelf)













Offers? Billy - Im looking at you here?

Link to post
Share on other sites

Car Take Back have offered £65 for the MicraShed so any offes north of this will be considerd and the missus wants shut of it now off the driveway and out of her life - on the plus side if it goes off the drive I have space for another shitter - so every cloud and all that.....

Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm looking at you back, M, but I've no space here for something out of test and with no hope of me getting one for it due to the work needed.

I'm pretty sure these are/were popular with auto grassers, is there a group near you to advertise it with?

Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm looking at you back, M, but I've no space here for something out of test and with no hope of me getting one for it due to the work needed.

I'm pretty sure these are/were popular with auto grassers, is there a group near you to advertise it with?

No idea Im afraid - the banger boys at Carnforth love them, but cant see any of them wanting to part with cash for it. Shame really.

Its still got a test for another 12 days !!! So not quite out of MOT... But not far off lets face it.

Link to post
Share on other sites
UltraWomble, on 09 Oct 2015 - 3:42 PM, said:

i know, Im being a twat and shuld take the ton...



I'd take it, but my guess is he won't give you that for it anyway. He doesn't seem to have asked any questions about it, he lives miles away, it's SORNED, needs a fair bit of work and there's only a short MOT.

I'm not saying that to spil your advert I hasten to add, it's just you can sort of sense this 'buyer' isn't going to bother.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • UltraWomble changed the title to Wombles Wheels - C3 Picasso its Boxy... But meh!

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Create New...