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Once was enough :-(


smiffy637

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There's very few things I've driven that have been awful, only ones I can think of are Corsa D 1.2 (accelerator is just a NVH generator) and a Citroen C1 that drove nicely enough but my hands were still vibrating from the engine hours later. Oddly I couldn't feel the wheel vibrating during the drive.

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Nova SRi.

Early mk5 Escort with no PAS

Renault 5 GT Turbo

I've found Novas to be very good cars, if a rather prone to rust. Zippy 1.2 with light,responsive steering and a sharp gear change.

Suzuki Wagon R wasn't too bad to drive but ultra embarrassing to be seen in.

Astra max n/a diesel, zero steering feel and so low on power it made overtaking akin to racing a Zeppelin.

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VW Golf mk4 automatic 1.6. A glacier moves faster, and gallons to mile. Bastard broke down as well. Fucking VAG shit. Belongs to my sis in law, every time its in the garage, its a £500 minimum repair. Told her to bridge the fucker

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Shitroen Paxo 1.1 West Coast, had one as a courtesy car once, fucker was that horrid pink, with a body kit on, with dealer stickers all over, pedals way too close together for my size 11 feet in steel toecaps, and it felt so fucking flimsy and cheap. 

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Most mediocre in it's numbness was a Mk1 Escort 1.1 2 door works pool car back in '81; vile. Why is there such a scene tax on these bland boggo standard machines? Latest frustrating mediocrity was another pool car, a recent Fiesta 4 door with a clutchless / semi-auto gear-change; between auto-shifts the car almost comes to a halt before picking up again (hope it's an individual fault, rather than an example of standard performance); potentially dangerous, definitely vile.

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For gutless shit, three cars i wish never to lay eyes on again.

 

Mk4 Escort 1.4 lean burn, miserable thing that was, had them by the hundred on the rental fleets.

 

3 cyl Corsa, fleets of the bastards used by BSM, wouldn't pull your foreskin back.

 

Current Fiat 500, especially when fitted with satans gearbox the wonderful automated manual.

 

All three of these were a nightmare to get on the top deck of a transporter, but the Fiat wears the crown of utterly-fuckin-useless-pile-of-wank, even with a run up it couldn't pull itself up onto the top deck, solution was for driver to get a run up and it would come to a grinding halt just balancing on the back of the top deck, driver would stay in car whilst one of us colleagues raised the deck to level or preferably (for safety) tilted slightly forward, then driver could drive it forward to its desired location.

 

Depending where on the lorry it sat, it could be sitting in flip over ''greedy bars'', even though it would be facing downhill to unload it sometimes meant ratchetting the bastard out of the greedy's while some poor bugger sat in the car, sometimes they couldn't even pull themselves out of that minor stop even facing downhill.

 

Even though they were diabolically awful shit, the other two could, with enough of a run up, manage to get up the deck so long as the skids were angled to give enough approach angle for the run.

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