Cavcraft Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 New depths plummed (plumbed?) yet again...(Year) 2000 Focus 2.0 Ghia (petrol)It's horribleMOT 6th AugustIt's horribleTaxed end of JulyIt's horrible131,000 miles.It's horribleStarts, runs, drives, stops.It's horribleElectric windowsIt's horribleAlloy wheelsIt's horribleHad two new tyres in MayIt's horrible.Right, that's the 'good' bits out of the way.It's FUCKING horrible.Was a farmer's car and looks like it.Two tyres are a bit shit.He says it smokes a bit 'sometimes.'Cleanliness is on par with a herd of Fresians with the shits who reside in Jordan's knickers.Windscreen cracked.It looks, and is by default, absolutely fucking horrible.Can you make use of it or some of the bits*? Can you beat the scrapyard? Are you fucking mental?Please answer yes to at least one of those questions, but answer yes quickly.Logbook is here, but so was the will to live about an hour ago and that's long since jumped ship.£150 (firm) can take it from Chester, Cheshire. Pretty sure it's worth more if you remove cat, battery and alloys and weigh the rest in.*I'm not stripping it for bits, you can do that yourself at your place.** You will be. Oh, the stinging irony of the number plate Buy it something please. Vince70 and Conrad D. Conelrad 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beko1987 Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 Oof if I had the money that sounds like a project! Sadly I don't so good luck with frag (glwf) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greengartside Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 WOW SUPA VALU! I would have been all over this like AUTO AIDS if I had the spare cash - a cliche I know but GLWTS Billy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chaseracer Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 Stap me edgeways, that's GRIM. Where do I sign?* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sloth in a bowl Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 Despite it being horrible, Mk1 Focus means there will be a good drive under there somewhere.Was shocked when I first drove a Focus how just 'right' everything could feel on a car at high speed. If I drove a tidy one now I wouldn't be as impressed but it would still be good. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cavcraft Posted July 26, 2014 Author Share Posted July 26, 2014 Temp reprieve granted, but only because one scrapyard have offered more than another. greengartside 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sporty-shite Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 To be fair, I don't think that's as bad as it looks. However, I'm not buying it unless someone wants to give me a load of money for one of the current chod-piles furnishing my drive. GLWS M8. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cavcraft Posted July 26, 2014 Author Share Posted July 26, 2014 To be fair, I don't think that's as bad as it looks. However, I'm not buying it unless someone wants to give me a load of money for one of the current chod-piles furnishing my drive. GLWS M8. To be fair, it's probably worse. Collect now, pay later scheme available to regular shiteists. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim Bell Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 Nautilus to surface support vessel, Nautilus to surface support vessel, come in over. We read you loud and clear Nautilus, go ahead, over. Our gauges may be malfunctioning, but the readings say we have sunk to a new and hitherto unexperienced depths. It may be an all time low, over. Roger Nautilus. Can you see anything down there, over. Roger that surface support vessel. Theres something down here. It...... It looks like a car. Or maybe it WAS a car. It hard to look straight at it. I feel sick. I think its giving me The Bends, and eyeball cancer. I'm turning off the viewing lights then I'll surface. Are you recieving the vid-feed from the external cameras, over? Roger Nautilus. We have a visual. Stay where you are. The decision has been made to nuke the area. E.T.A two minutes, over. Its not that bad!! It must be worth a hundred and fifty pounds!! More if you take the CAT, wheels and battery off!!! OVER! No! Over!! Jim Bergerac, Cavcraft, Twiggy and 1 other 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim Bell Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 Good luck with the sail. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Split_Pin Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 That front indicator replacement is SCHAMAZEBALLS. beko1987 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cavcraft Posted July 26, 2014 Author Share Posted July 26, 2014 The other front one is the same, only the offside one doesn't work. It's a horrible bastard of a car. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AlabamaShrimp Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 What's the chance of it passing it's test? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
outlaw118 Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 To Mr A Shrimp. Cavcraft pride themselves with the quality of stock they hold, just remember the Cavcraft Group motto. "Want your money back? You can fuck off." sporty-shite, Vince70, trigger and 6 others 9 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AlabamaShrimp Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 Lol some dick bought a civic coupe off me years ago and drove it straight down to Kent. Rung next day to say the battery was broken, he got a similar answer Only asking as it's test short and I've a apparently go a picky wife how would moan the arse off me if I went and bought some heap that needed a ton of work. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tetleysmooth Posted July 26, 2014 Share Posted July 26, 2014 In all fairness, they do drive really nice. It is is fucking horrible though. Top marks Billy. Cavcraft 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
twosmoke300 Posted July 27, 2014 Share Posted July 27, 2014 Old foci are just terrible. Brake pipes , hoses , rust , suspension bushes , rear bearings , rust etc etc . But for scrap money wcpgw. Cavcraft 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cavcraft Posted July 27, 2014 Author Share Posted July 27, 2014 What's the chance of it passing it's test? I'll say slim because I honestly don't know. It definitely needs two tyres and several thousand pounds worth of jet washing, then there's the fact it's smoking a bit, so the previous owner said. I've pitched it at a touch over scrap money on the basis that if it does need too much work for the test, you could pull the battery, cat and alloys, weigh the rest in and sit square on the money front. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cavcraft Posted July 27, 2014 Author Share Posted July 27, 2014 I started this today and it smokes like a Benson & Hedges beagle on Bank Holiday bonanza bonus overtime. I'll run it to the scrappy tomorrow. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greengartside Posted July 27, 2014 Share Posted July 27, 2014 Sad news, if the engine is borked then there's not much point in the rest of it. R.I.P W509 UAV. March 2000 - July 2014. Lest we Forget.... Bren, catsinthewelder, Cavcraft and 9 others 12 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HH-R Posted July 27, 2014 Share Posted July 27, 2014 It's a shame, as it's worth buying for those MEGALOL indicators alone! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cavcraft Posted July 28, 2014 Author Share Posted July 28, 2014 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Partridge Posted July 28, 2014 Share Posted July 28, 2014 YOU BASTARD THIS PLACE ISN'T WHAT IT USED TO BE I DESPAIR FOR THE FUTURE OF THIS WORLD!! ITS ONLY WHEN ALL THE SHIT FOCUSES ARE GONE WILL PEOPLE LIKE YOU SEE WHAT YOU ARE DOING YOU BASTARD!! Minimad5, Cavcraft and Conrad D. Conelrad 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doctormop Posted July 28, 2014 Share Posted July 28, 2014 Looking at those interior pics the scrapyard might be closed for the rest of the week while they have their crusher fumigated. Partridge, Cavcraft and HH-R 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Partridge Posted July 28, 2014 Share Posted July 28, 2014 Maybe the crusher will resign and lobby for Crusher's Rights. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greengartside Posted July 28, 2014 Share Posted July 28, 2014 14 years - not a bad innings for a modern daily car. R.I.P. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Partridge Posted July 28, 2014 Share Posted July 28, 2014 13 years is the mathematical average. So good going Focus, may you live a long and happy life as a can of beans or a microwave. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Conrad D. Conelrad Posted July 28, 2014 Share Posted July 28, 2014 So good going Focus, may you live a long and happy life as a can of beans Craig the Princess, cobblers, coalnotdole and 11 others 14 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cavcraft Posted July 28, 2014 Author Share Posted July 28, 2014 Autoshite artist of the year 11/10 TYVM. Now can you do an artist's impression of an Barry Shitpeas buying my Fiesta? It'd have to be one of those stood by the front passing cash with grinning faces. Maybe Barry has thought bubbles coming from his head with a picture of him driving down the sea front at Sunderland and I have a thought bubble with a picture of a topless Emma Bunton leaning out of the drivers window of a Mk3 Astra 1.4LS 3 door smiling. Jim Bell 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Partridge Posted July 28, 2014 Share Posted July 28, 2014 Autoshite artist of the year 11/10 TYVM. Now can you do an artist's impression of an Barry Shitpeas buying my Fiesta? It'd have to be one of those stood by the front passing cash with grinning faces. Maybe Barry has thought bubbles coming from his head with a picture of him driving down the sea front at Sunderland and I have a thought bubble with a picture of a topless Emma Bunton leaning out of the drivers window of a Mk3 Astra 1.4LS 3 door smiling.Can I have a go too? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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