Confessions Corner? Forgive me Father for I can haz sins.

[Matty]

I like the look of that new civic type r. There I've said it

[stuboy]

I like the look of that new civic type r. There I've said it

Spotted today

[fatharris]

I've locked myself in the boot of a Primera saloon, with the keys in my pocket.

Twice.

I've made the mistake with the Mini of cutting a rust hole out to match the shape of the repair panel, and not the repair panel to match the rust hole, which naturally doesn't fit in any way. That was over three years ago and I haven't touched it since.

 

I've shorted a live to an earth using a bit of gardening wire to see if the brake lights were working, looked down to find the bit of garden wire glowing and embedding itself in my thumb.

 

Ten days after major surgery repositioning my jaw, I decided to replace the doors on Herman. Big heavy doors at that. Remarkably, that job went off without a hitch, so I went to stow my tools, and somehow managed to smack myself square in the jaw with a lump hammer. For about a week afterwards, if I pressed on the roof of my mouth with my tongue, my back teeth would flew inwards.

I didn't say a damn thing to the doctors when I returned for my check up.

MrsH's Clio failed the MOT for a number of things, including a glass buoy hanging in the mirror. I didn't want to break the loop on it, so I popped the rear view mirror off to remove the buoy. Tried pushing it back onto the ball and socket, and cracked the windscreen.

 

Doing a rear shock change on a friends Fiesta, I found the lower nut to be unbelievably stiff. I eventually resorted to an extension pole on my ratchet handle, before I got the bugger to turn, stripping all the nut threads. Left it on tighten, didn't I? Didn't have a nut with the correct thread to replace it with, so I deliberately cross threaded a different nut onto it. Lasted until rust killed it the next year.

I'm sure there's more.

 

[Noel Tidybeard]

I have a desire for an electric CF, I need forgiveness.

 

no, no, no, no, no, you need no forgivness at all*

 

 

 

 

*although i may be biased as family friend was gaffer at Evelyn road for many years

[Wack]

I bought a XK8 with a knackered engine , bought a good engine and steve my mechanic swapped them , money was tight and I had 5l of pink antifreeze in the shed so I took it to him

 

a couple of days later I get a call , I've used this antifreeze , where did you get it , can't remember it's been in the shed for years, it was at that point the oh fucckkkk moment happened and I remembered using an empty antifreeze bottle to tip the last remnants of a drum of pink car shampoo in to intending to write shampoo on the bottle.

 

I bet the cooling system was clean though, he left the hose in it for an hour until bubbles stopped coming out

[Wack]

I took my Driving test in a BL Mini just as I was doing my emergency stop my brakes went AWOL !

I felt them go as I started to brake so just thought sod it an jamned on the anchors!

To my surprize the car came to a smooth stop presumeably due to loss of pressre just as they should of locked on?

I had an old lecturous examiner who seemed more interested in my legs than watching my every move

He had litterally forgot to do the Emergency stop until we were nearly back at the test centre so I moved off and by luck was not stopped by any lights or anything on the way back and stopped using my handbrake in the test centre car park!

I was convinced id failed but I passed

Usual stuff examiner talks to my instructor,my instructor comes back to the car tells me to swap seats and say's...................................

The Examiner said it was the "Best Emergency stop he had seen in a long time!" I then confessed and we opened the bonnet on my Wee Mini Clubman to find a large patch of stripped paint down my bulkhead trailing away from the master cylinder

It seems because of rust the bottom had blown out of it as I did the Emergency Stop

My instructor used to have an ADO16 so had a suitable replacement in his garage to bodge it so we swung by his en route home and fixed it on his driveway

Needless to say I will never forget my test!!!!

All these men running around after you

 

A few years ago I was on my way home from work , a girl of about 20 wearing not much had a puncture, car bumped up the kerb , 3 x 7.5t trucks all from the same company were lined up behind her car , it was like watching a F1 pit crew in action , one in the boot, one jacking, one on the wheel nuts

[Matty]

Spotted today

Now you put a picture up and it makes it seem worse than what it is!

[DavidB]

I was once working underneath my car in a tight lock up garage unit. I caught the hood of my top on a random undercar protrusion, and the only way out was through the front.

My girlfriend was in hysterics at the sight of me turning the air blue as I emerged with half the torn top on my body, and the rest still anchored to the protrusion 2 metres away under the car.

[Zelandeth]

Last year I noticed the day before the MOT that one of the rubber straps the rear exhaust silencer is suspended from on the Lada had gone AWOL.  Didn't have a spare in stock, and it would just do the same if replaced anyway...problem was due to my bodged intermediate pipe pulling the back box slightly to one side.  Meant there wasn't quite enough weight on the strap to keep the hooks under tension.  Said bodged middle section was bodged because the correct pipe is made of pure unobtanium.

With no better option available to me, I stuck a cable tie on there.  My MOT tester had a giggle at it and marked it down as an advisory "rear exhaust hanger repaired" as I recall.

A year and a half on, the cable tie is still there.

Will finally be dispensed with in the next week or so when the intermediate section (which is more bodge than pipe at this point) will be getting replaced properly.

[Vince70]

I’ve a few over the years but one that did stand out was when finishing a late shift at 9pm on a snowy evening.

At the time back in the early nineties I had a old very rusty red  (1986) XR2  and cleaned  enough snow off the windows and jiggled the keys in the locks as I thought they had frozen and up the road I went back home.

I got a couple of miles up the road and looked around my normally littered car for a pack of B&H and I noticed it was very clean inside and not littered with cigarettes and empty coke cans that I knew something was wrong and I had taken the wrong car.

So I took the car straight back to the work carpark and noticed mine had been parked next to the identical but more or less immaculate car  compared to my horrible rusty Spanish built example.

I did find the owner the following day however and told him and he thanked me for warming the car up for him as he finished an hour later than me  and wondered why his car had no snow on it and the heater came through nice and toasty.

 

[iainrcz]

I once reversed my very clean 406 in to a metal security post. It fractured the rear bumper, I was fucking livid.

It wasn't my fault obviously.

 

A friend had broken down and phoned me to go and try and help him fix it.

I did, after I'd had my leg over with the girlfriend down a country lane.

 

About 3 days after buying my GT 86 I decided to take the engine cover off to clean it.

Obviously I broke the clips and bodged it back on with blu tac.

 

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