Spiny Norman Posted May 31, 2012 Share Posted May 31, 2012 Where I park my car is right next to some bushes and in this 'glorious summer' we've been having it seems to be filling up with bugs of all persuasions. I went down to it this morning and door mirror spider gave me a knowing wink as he scuttled off into his den inside the drivers mirror casing. There were several sets of footprints on the bonnet and over the roof. At least one cat and by the looks of it a seagull, possibly having some sort of territorial dispute because there were feathers everywhere. Then door mirror spider's pal decided to drop down from his vantage point in the sun visor when I had just entered the nice dark narrow Clyde tunnel..... Nothing beats the day when I came down to my old Beetle which didn't lock and found a whole tramp asleep in the back seat though. I asked him if he wanted to go to Shettleston and he told me to fuck off, so I made him get out. Which of God's tiny (or not so tiny) creatures have you found in your cars? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spiny Norman Posted May 31, 2012 Author Share Posted May 31, 2012 Where I park my car is right next to some bushes and in this 'glorious summer' we've been having it seems to be filling up with bugs of all persuasions. I went down to it this morning and door mirror spider gave me a knowing wink as he scuttled off into his den inside the drivers mirror casing. There were several sets of footprints on the bonnet and over the roof. At least one cat and by the looks of it a seagull, possibly having some sort of territorial dispute because there were feathers everywhere. Then door mirror spider's pal decided to drop down from his vantage point in the sun visor when I had just entered the nice dark narrow Clyde tunnel..... Nothing beats the day when I came down to my old Beetle which didn't lock and found a whole tramp asleep in the back seat though. I asked him if he wanted to go to Shettleston and he told me to fuck off, so I made him get out. Which of God's tiny (or not so tiny) creatures have you found in your cars? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Albert Ross Posted May 31, 2012 Share Posted May 31, 2012 About 12/13 years ago, I had a garden full of Mk1 Sierras, a couple of Pugs, and Land Rovers here and there. Well one Sierra had become a little broken (27" out of line, quarter window broken after a trailer jacknifed into it, etc) after a minor interface with a Renault Magnum. A lovely 1985 2.0i Ghia in Regency Red. I decided to remove various minor parts one Sunday, about three months after the accident. I opened up the driver's door, dropped the parking brake, and rolled it gently forward to a hard standing area, to start the proceedings. There was a little movement in the back, followed by a large furry black cloud, and a fucking great "SPRITZ MACKLE MACKLE FWOWT" kind of commotion, followed by an egress of fur, and silence. Or so I thought. There was a gentle "mewing" going off in the back seat. A tentative search revealed 4 kittens, eyes just open, asleep in my best (forgotten) overalls on the rear floor. (Thank fuck they weren't on the seats!) I found homes for them all,including the Mother (Millie) and one of them found favour with a REALLY great friend of mine, who has him to this day. Ladles and Jellyspoons, I give you Eric. Born in a Sierra Mk1 Ghia. HIs "owner" is a shite nut.... currently has a BINI, but has had a Lotus Elise, owns a real Beetle, and has a penchant for the Vulcan, Steam Railways, and County Cricket. And She's a Girl!!!!! Who also drinks pints.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Albert Ross Posted May 31, 2012 Share Posted May 31, 2012 About 12/13 years ago, I had a garden full of Mk1 Sierras, a couple of Pugs, and Land Rovers here and there. Well one Sierra had become a little broken (27" out of line, quarter window broken after a trailer jacknifed into it, etc) after a minor interface with a Renault Magnum. A lovely 1985 2.0i Ghia in Regency Red. I decided to remove various minor parts one Sunday, about three months after the accident. I opened up the driver's door, dropped the parking brake, and rolled it gently forward to a hard standing area, to start the proceedings. There was a little movement in the back, followed by a large furry black cloud, and a fucking great "SPRITZ MACKLE MACKLE FWOWT" kind of commotion, followed by an egress of fur, and silence. Or so I thought. There was a gentle "mewing" going off in the back seat. A tentative search revealed 4 kittens, eyes just open, asleep in my best (forgotten) overalls on the rear floor. (Thank fuck they weren't on the seats!) I found homes for them all,including the Mother (Millie) and one of them found favour with a REALLY great friend of mine, who has him to this day. Ladles and Jellyspoons, I give you Eric. Born in a Sierra Mk1 Ghia. HIs "owner" is a shite nut.... currently has a BINI, but has had a Lotus Elise, owns a real Beetle, and has a penchant for the Vulcan, Steam Railways, and County Cricket. And She's a Girl!!!!! Who also drinks pints.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
philibusmo Posted May 31, 2012 Share Posted May 31, 2012 A couple of years back whilst driving down a fast winding a-road on my way back from college, a spider the size of a small dog crawled out of the drivers side air vent and started running lengths on the top of the dash. I fucking hate spiders, to the point that if one comes into my house it gets shot, so I was not best pleased with this turn of events, but then he settled down on the passenger side, so all seemed ok. Unfortunately as I entered a medium sized village it ran back across and then bungy jumped into the drivers footwell. In my panic I completely stopped watching the road and began trying to stamp on it and waving my arms around. When I looked up I was on the verge of running down about 10 people at a fish and chip van so I whipped my hands back up to the wheel, catching the choke cable and ripping it into the open position and pulling it from the dash at which point I jammed the brakes on and stalled about 2 foot away from killing them all horribly. I then had to spend 10 minutes with the bonnet open trying to fix the choke to get the bastarding thing to start again whilst a polarising profusely to these people who had just had their life flash before their eyes. Not my best moment, truth be told. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
philibusmo Posted May 31, 2012 Share Posted May 31, 2012 A couple of years back whilst driving down a fast winding a-road on my way back from college, a spider the size of a small dog crawled out of the drivers side air vent and started running lengths on the top of the dash. I fucking hate spiders, to the point that if one comes into my house it gets shot, so I was not best pleased with this turn of events, but then he settled down on the passenger side, so all seemed ok. Unfortunately as I entered a medium sized village it ran back across and then bungy jumped into the drivers footwell. In my panic I completely stopped watching the road and began trying to stamp on it and waving my arms around. When I looked up I was on the verge of running down about 10 people at a fish and chip van so I whipped my hands back up to the wheel, catching the choke cable and ripping it into the open position and pulling it from the dash at which point I jammed the brakes on and stalled about 2 foot away from killing them all horribly. I then had to spend 10 minutes with the bonnet open trying to fix the choke to get the bastarding thing to start again whilst a polarising profusely to these people who had just had their life flash before their eyes. Not my best moment, truth be told. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PhilA Posted June 1, 2012 Share Posted June 1, 2012 Mostly bloody spiders. This area sees a lot of black widows, brown recluse, brown widows etc. I had taken the front suspension to bits one summer, knowing it was going to be a long time the suspension was out, piled the bits inside the car. Spider had made a nest in one of the brake discs, as they are ventilated.Came back to the car two weeks later and it was full of probably a thousand tiny brown widows, and we'd looking like something off the set of The Addams Family. Lobbed a can of bug killer in there, shut the door and walked away from it. Two weeks later went round it with a vacuum cleaner... The damn things love dark, secluded spaces, like on top of the fuel tank, by the fuel filter, on the brakes, up in the springs etc. I've emptied too many cans of bug spray onto the car and the things still come back -Phil Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PhilA Posted June 1, 2012 Share Posted June 1, 2012 Mostly bloody spiders. This area sees a lot of black widows, brown recluse, brown widows etc. I had taken the front suspension to bits one summer, knowing it was going to be a long time the suspension was out, piled the bits inside the car. Spider had made a nest in one of the brake discs, as they are ventilated.Came back to the car two weeks later and it was full of probably a thousand tiny brown widows, and we'd looking like something off the set of The Addams Family. Lobbed a can of bug killer in there, shut the door and walked away from it. Two weeks later went round it with a vacuum cleaner... The damn things love dark, secluded spaces, like on top of the fuel tank, by the fuel filter, on the brakes, up in the springs etc. I've emptied too many cans of bug spray onto the car and the things still come back -Phil Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Volksy Posted June 1, 2012 Share Posted June 1, 2012 About ten years ago, I was contracted to work in Southern Italy, managing a team of bods removing equipment from a closed down campsite, to move it all up to some of our other sites in Venice. It was mid summer, and about 35 degrees most of the time. We had a fleet of Europcar hire vans, and myself and two collegues were bombing along the auto-strada at about 140kph in a LWB Ducato. Mateus - a German lad working for me was driving, and myself and an english lass are all up front chatting away, when suddenly a little green head pops out of the centre dash airvent. The little lizard then sprints across the dash, and dissapears down one of the screen demister vents. Mateus freaks out, slewing across two lanes of the motorway, whilst cursing and wildly hitting the dashboard. He manages to stop the van on the hard shoulder, and jumps out, still shouting his head off. We investigate, but no sign of out little hitcher. So, setting off again, we travel for about half an hour, all of us watching for any sign of the lizard. We assume that it's managed to get out of the heating system, so begin to relax, Mateus cadges a cigarette off me, as he's driving, I light it for him and pass it over. As he takes the cig, he simulatainiously presses the window switch on the armrest , but his face briefly shows a look of confusion as the window doesnt work. Turns out rather than the switch, he's actually pressed a small green lizard, which was quite happily sat on the armrest of his door. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Volksy Posted June 1, 2012 Share Posted June 1, 2012 About ten years ago, I was contracted to work in Southern Italy, managing a team of bods removing equipment from a closed down campsite, to move it all up to some of our other sites in Venice. It was mid summer, and about 35 degrees most of the time. We had a fleet of Europcar hire vans, and myself and two collegues were bombing along the auto-strada at about 140kph in a LWB Ducato. Mateus - a German lad working for me was driving, and myself and an english lass are all up front chatting away, when suddenly a little green head pops out of the centre dash airvent. The little lizard then sprints across the dash, and dissapears down one of the screen demister vents. Mateus freaks out, slewing across two lanes of the motorway, whilst cursing and wildly hitting the dashboard. He manages to stop the van on the hard shoulder, and jumps out, still shouting his head off. We investigate, but no sign of out little hitcher. So, setting off again, we travel for about half an hour, all of us watching for any sign of the lizard. We assume that it's managed to get out of the heating system, so begin to relax, Mateus cadges a cigarette off me, as he's driving, I light it for him and pass it over. As he takes the cig, he simulatainiously presses the window switch on the armrest , but his face briefly shows a look of confusion as the window doesnt work. Turns out rather than the switch, he's actually pressed a small green lizard, which was quite happily sat on the armrest of his door. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cavcraft Posted June 1, 2012 Share Posted June 1, 2012 Found some pretty big spiders over the years which freaked me out especially when driving. Found a field mice nest in a BX engine bay, two of which were still there. Sadly one of our cats got one, the other we managed to catch and set free a couple of miles away. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cavcraft Posted June 1, 2012 Share Posted June 1, 2012 Found some pretty big spiders over the years which freaked me out especially when driving. Found a field mice nest in a BX engine bay, two of which were still there. Sadly one of our cats got one, the other we managed to catch and set free a couple of miles away. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vin Posted June 1, 2012 Share Posted June 1, 2012 Had the usual resident spiders in the wing mirrors. It was quite amusing watching them come out on to the web whilst bored sat in traffic on the M62. When I did the resto of the 126, when I cut one of the sills off to replace it there was a mouse nest in there. Must have got in through the cross member. The previous owner told me that the heating in the 126 was very good, but I had never been able to get it to work... When I took the engine out to rebuild it, I took the metal pipe off that connects between engine and body - there was an old mouse nest in there too. Heating worked well after that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vin Posted June 1, 2012 Share Posted June 1, 2012 Had the usual resident spiders in the wing mirrors. It was quite amusing watching them come out on to the web whilst bored sat in traffic on the M62. When I did the resto of the 126, when I cut one of the sills off to replace it there was a mouse nest in there. Must have got in through the cross member. The previous owner told me that the heating in the 126 was very good, but I had never been able to get it to work... When I took the engine out to rebuild it, I took the metal pipe off that connects between engine and body - there was an old mouse nest in there too. Heating worked well after that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Negative Creep Posted June 1, 2012 Share Posted June 1, 2012 I have a dead fly on the side of my instrument cluster . A friend also found a mummified bird in the grille of his Sirocco Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scaryoldcortina Posted June 1, 2012 Share Posted June 1, 2012 I returned from a "spirited" drive in my cortina one day to discover it had collected a small bird. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tayne Posted June 1, 2012 Share Posted June 1, 2012 Flies used to like my Range Rover Classic. Fly Magnet by Tayne, on Flickr Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CreepingJesus Posted June 1, 2012 Share Posted June 1, 2012 In all my years, and miles of driving, I've never come across windscreen splatted bugs as greasy and impossible to shift as the ones I encountered last weekend in NW England. Any one else notice that? The look of 'wtf?' on the valeters face on Monday morning was priceless!I've had a small bird stuck/splatted in the grille of a van before. Jetwashed it, and the blood smears out. The other week, a bird flew into the visor of 'my' truck. When I got back to base there was only a head, pinned to the visor by its' beak. Couldn't reach it...left it. Lost count of the game birds I've hit. Knocked a nice big pheasant into the middle of next week, on the Kelso - St Boswells road once. Thought 'fuck it', stopped, got out and grabbed one of the impermeable plastic bags I had out of the boot. I saw a big hairy arm come thro', under the hedge and grab 'my' pheasant. Balls.Found rats in fridge trailers which have been left open 'down the back of the yard' too long. Rat vs rigger boot...always a fun game. EDIT: forgot one. Didn't happen to me, but I saw the aftermath. Tesco DAF vs large male stag, on the way back from Oban; it's a long story, but the truck won, just, despite suffering fucked coolant and A/C radiators and the grille. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ashmicro Posted June 2, 2012 Share Posted June 2, 2012 I once bashed into an flying pheasant in my Ka. It hit the very top of the windscreen and bounced like a goodun. About 15 years ago I bought a slightly tatty mark 2 Goof GiT 8v. Further inspection revealed a bunch of really tiny field mice in the airbox. I liberated them and placed them in a big Tupperware box, and took them over to the playing fields opposite my parents' house. While I was over there, I was approached by this "lentil" type woman who asked me what I was doing (she thought I was catching the mice, not letting them go). Anyway, got chatting to her, met up for a drink later, shagged her. RESULT! Thank you little mouses. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Father Ted Posted June 2, 2012 Share Posted June 2, 2012 I completely stopped watching the road and began trying to stamp on it and waving my arms around. Its a little known factoid that over 70% of unexplained motoring accidents involve insects distracting drivers. Interestingly over 50% of people attending A&E have consumed a sausage within the last 72 hours too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spiny Norman Posted June 2, 2012 Author Share Posted June 2, 2012 Interestingly over 50% of people attending A&E have consumed a sausage within the last 72 hours too. Is "consumed a sausage" being used as some sort of euphemism here, like "playing the pink oboe", or are we really just talking about bangers & mash for tea? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fotorabia Posted June 2, 2012 Share Posted June 2, 2012 Hornets nest in the Merc..ive left it there as a symbolic reminder..fly the coup..but always remember where home is..ps..on a rural bus recently we killed 3 galah parrots in one go..only one survived..imagine loosing your family like thatpps..this is what happens to Skippy when they play on the road at night...they like the warmth of the tarmac... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Father Ted Posted June 3, 2012 Share Posted June 3, 2012 Interestingly over 50% of people attending A&E have consumed a sausage within the last 72 hours too. Is "consumed a sausage" being used as some sort of euphemism here, like "playing the pink oboe", or are we really just talking about bangers & mash for tea? Government sources say ministers see the Swedish study as an opportunity to address a problem that costs the NHS in excess of £5bn each year. One said: “A staggering 70% of inpatient appointments and over half of A&E admissions involve someone who has consumed a sausage at some time in the preceding 72 hours. If we deal with the underlying sausage problem, NHS finances and the nation’s health will take care of themselves. â€Âhttp://www.networks.nhs.uk/editors-blog Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skizzer Posted June 5, 2012 Share Posted June 5, 2012 Found these round shell things in the battery tray of the Dedra: former home to some sort of gall wasp, I think. Yuck. IMG_1333 by Skizzer, on Flickr Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HillmanImp Posted June 5, 2012 Share Posted June 5, 2012 Found these round shell things in the battery tray of the Dedra: former home to some sort of gall wasp, I think. Yuck. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fotorabia Posted June 25, 2012 Share Posted June 25, 2012 As the stereo is going in soon...i decided to extract the front dash His Masters Non Voice kaputt speakers..oh hallo..an ant colony..lift opposite side...the whole goddamn orchestra of the critturs have taken over the system and im suspecting rebellion and the imminent failure of what is left working in this cluster...just dont touch the clock..i like the ticking..its like a time bomb.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DSdriver Posted June 25, 2012 Share Posted June 25, 2012 I used to work nightshift in the print in Lunon. I was driving home down the Old Kent Road about 5 or 6ish one summer's morning when I had to stop at a set of lights. A pigeon tried to land in the road in front of the car just as the lights changed and I gunned it down the road. The pigeon must have been flattened against the radiator with its wings spread because I could see him looking at me over the edge of the bonnet. He was stuck there till I had to stop at another set of lights where he was able to make his escape. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Albert Ross Posted June 25, 2012 Share Posted June 25, 2012 Many, many wonderful years ago, my then Girlfriend was driving us away from Stratfield Saye, in her GSA... When two doves (I think) emerged from the undergrowth, and broke her headlights. Cunts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joethornton1986 Posted June 27, 2012 Share Posted June 27, 2012 Loads of bloody spiders causing near misses on the road! i personally think spiders sense fear and come after you if your scared of them LOL. Also accidently ran over a badger once driving home very late at night, i stopped but he ran off so i assumed he must of been ok, the next morning i saw the full extent of the damage, front valance bent right in and lower front of the car covered in blood felt guilty for ages about that Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trigger Posted June 27, 2012 Share Posted June 27, 2012 I ran over a pair of shagging badgers once on a country lane, they were at it in the middle of the road late one night and there nothing i could do, they took the front bumper of my Escort at the time, i felt bad about that. I've also ran over a fox at 70mph on the A12 in my mum's Mk2 Fiesta and ripped the valance off, and when i done my ebay advert last year for my Mk3 Escort i sold a bloody spider came flying out of the air vent at me whilst i was demostrating my blowers alone with half a ton of other shit! (around the 4:10 mark ) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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