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How piss poor was Top Gear last night?


The Reverend Bluejeans

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What a load of shit - and I normally like it. Boring, predictable and of course three cars fucked over good and proper - the Mini was a pity (and I don't do Minis) but to ruin a tidy Shadow 1 like that and the XJS was just ridiculous. I couldn't be bothered to watch the last 20 mins - what got destroyed? Don't tell me - the Allegro got blown up/chucked in a river etc etc.

 

90 minutes of utter crap - and at what cost? :evil:

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Just logged on to post exactly the same thing, utter shit!

 

I too turned off the last 20 minutes. Even James May looked embarrased at one stage as if to say "what am I doing with these 2 pricks?". Clarkson was the worst though, annoying and acting like a spoiled brat. Rubbish TV :evil:

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what's challenging about driving a superb bit of engineering like a Shadow across india other than the horrible dangerous traffic?

 

lots of non car related stuff that was quite frankly boring.

 

There seems to be genuine contempt coming from May in the direction of Clarkson with Hammond being a toady to Clarkson's bully.

 

I suspect their flush is busted although there are still enough twits out there who want to spend hours in the pub debating whether one car that no one is able to afford is slightly faster than some other car that no one is able t afford - meanwhile Clarkson et al dance iff into the future with the license payer's cash and ARE ablt to afford those cars.

 

James May's Manlab Xmas Special however was rather amusing I particularly liked the idea of hiring a Sgt Major to make sure the cook (in this case the hapless Oz Clarke) was on schedule by shouting very loudly at a vert short range into his ear

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I thought it was just embarrassing and boring, but when Clarkson started hammering a screwdriver through the XJS bootlid, I knew all was lost. That Shadow 1 looked so clean and straight - notice how May didn't actually damage it.

 

If he has any sense, May will leave and do his own thing after this. He must have enough money by now.

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I'm a big fan of top gear but even I thought it was bollocks. The vietnam one felt like a genuine roadtrip and you got caught up in it but that was like watching a carry on film. It's odd because they got a lot of pelters for the obviously setup stuff before so they obviously ran out of time or ideas.

As was said whats surprising about buying a 7 grand car then being amazed when you drive it somewhere it doesn't break down?

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I too found this cringeworthy and almost utterly predictable, the only thing that made me smile was the firing off of tin cans and tennis balls in the 'improved' cricket match. Was I the only one looking out for the Allegro's lap time on the whiteboard? Glad to see it didn't get trashed. It wasn't required, which was a blessing. All 3 waxed lyrical about their cars at the end.. made me wonder why they buggered them up. Got a hint of remorse from JC and JM when they'd fecked their cars with the mountain tyres.. like 'what have I done..?'

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No longer a programme about cars - just three blokes fucking about ruining some good cars at the tax payers expense.

 

To be honest I do like James May - at least he is interested in the scientific side of things and he obviously does'nt take himself too seriously as he does'nt seem to mind being the "patsy" for the other two, they both seem to enjoy calling him "Captain Slow" and I suspect that in real life he would probably be better at attracting women than the other two.

 

Top gear is s programme that is rapidly running out of steam and I suspect that unless it reinvents itself it will be sent to the knackers yard - Clarkson's comments in the press are tolerated by the BBC as long as the programme is selling abroad - the day that stops happening it will be dropped like a hot potato.

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That one last night was pretty weak, but conversely its reception may give the programme's producers the kick up the arse that they need, and improve the show in the manner that others have already stated, eg, less formulaic, review everyday cars etc. Last night's effort has been roundly panned on teh interwebs, and the press will probably follow suit. I know the Beeb read MacDroitwich, and everyone who is anyone keeps an eye on ARRSE, The ARmy Rumour SErvice (it was even quoted in the House of Lords once).

 

It should be interesting to see what happens.

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I love TG, but have to admit that the India special was shit.

 

No need to ruin any of the cars, but they ruined the lot anyway. The garden party scene was shit. The banners on the train did make me chortle, and I have to admit that straight six cricket looked like fun. Just a shame they wrecked a nice XJS, a nice looking Shadow and a Mini.

 

The races across Europe were better than this staged shit. The Vietnam special was far better than this. Bolivia was epic in comparison.

 

I think the three presenters are equally to blame. May ruined the Roller, look at the rear arches on it after the stupid tyres were fitted, fucked.. Hammond wrecked the Mini, and the XJS, if they'd not fitted the stupid tyres to it that could have been saved with a fresh bonnet and bootlid.

 

2/10. Very poor effort.

 

 

As for reviewing everyday cars.... Nah. I watch TG because I like seeing Ferraris etc.

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I thought last nights episode was poor compared to their other epics like Vietnam, Bolivia and the Africa desert roadtrip. I didnt get the garden party scene or the tin delivering service, IMO it would have been better if they had one big challenge as opposed to a series of small lesser ones, And the destruction of the Mini, XJS and roller was to be expected, shame really but im glad the allegro wasnt blown into orbit.

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Used to enjoy some of the earlier 'challenges' they did, even though they were obviously 'staged' at times. As other people have said, the Bolivia and Vietnam trips were good IMHO.

 

Last nights just seemed to be scraping the barrel of everything they've done before and a good chunk not even car related.

 

As for venting R12 refrigerant (although suspect it was staged and only charged with compressed air to make the hissing sound), this suggests to the general unwashed motoring public that its an acceptable thing to do! Suspect the beeb may get complaints about this!

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As for venting R12 refrigerant (although suspect it was staged and only charged with compressed air to make the hissing sound), this suggests to the general unwashed motoring public that its an acceptable thing to do! Suspect the beeb may get complaints about this!

I suspect the trio will get away with it - Union Carbide's been having complaints about its Indian gas leak for yonks but still nothing's been done about that one!

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It does seem to have run out of steam now, a rather desperate take on what's been done before, with orchestrated 'incidents' and the presenters going out of their way to trash the cars. The 'Garden party' was extremely pointless and dull, except for the bit where the lawn mower went through a flower bed :roll:

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If you watched the Toy Stories series he did, you see James May's bird in that (she designed the Plasticine garden), who he has been with now well over 10 years. She is a lot better than the horse toothed bint Hammond is shacked up with, and the dwarf Clarkson is married to.

Stuck In Neutral/Slipping Clutch/Broken Gearbox has been Last Of The Summer Wine with cars. All that is missing is Hammond going down a hill in a tin bath/armchair on wheels. Clarkson is an egotistical twat, who really needs a good slapping, and he gets away with everything because of who he is buddies with (went to the same posh public school as producer Andy Wilman, and lives just up the road from Cameron). Public School cunt he is.

James has more respect for things, as there were very lean times for James in the early 90s after his infamous sacking from Autocar, where he actually made ends meet by driving buses in London just to keep himself afloat, plus he went to the local Comp (Oakwood Comprehensive School, in his then home town of Rotherham), whereas Clarkson has had everything handed to him on a plate, since he was a small boy. I have a feeling James is going to leave Top Gear soon, because he is getting more & more pissed off with Clarkson & Hammond, and them acting like fucking 2 year olds. I also would be willing to put money on it that he can outdrive the Hamster & the bafoon!

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I have a feeling James is going to leave Top Gear soon, because he is getting more & more pissed off with Clarkson & Hammond, and them acting like fucking 2 year olds. I also would be willing to put money on it that he can outdrive the Hamster & the bafoon!

 

Paid a fortune to travel the world and mess around with cars. Poor bloke.

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I can usually disengage my brain and ignore how obviously setup, formulaic and desperate TG is becoming, after tuning in about 20 minutes into the episode, I only managed about 5 minutes before I'd had enough. Top Gear has definitely had it's day. I forsee one more season (at best) and then the sunday night slot will be replaced with another Loose Women Dancing On Ice Factor type program, and that will be the end of cars on TV.

 

I am amused by how posh James May has turned out every time I'm reminded about him going to Oakwood. That place is about a mile from where I live, and it's shite. I bet he got some stick.

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I usually enjoy Top Gear, but that episode was truly dreadful. So predictable - "Look Clarkson and Hammond are messing around with James May's car, how hilarious...", "Hammond's turned turned sharply, I wonder what will happen to the cans on the roof..." etc, and every incident was so obviously staged.

 

Although I feared for the cars from the start, by about halfway through I was thinking maybe the saving grace of the episode would be that for once they don't destroy them - and those 3 were truly beautiful cars that looked completely mint. At least the Allegro got away unscathed.

 

Most cringeworthy was David Cameron's brief cameo at the beginning - embarrassing.

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@ Princess, James is getting more & more of his own shows, unlike Clarkson & Hammond, so he doesn't just rely on TG income. He's made a fair few bob on the 'Oz & James get pissed on holiday' and the 'James likes playing with old toys' format. You never know, James could even end up on 5th Gear.

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