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Dead_E23's Achievements

Rank: Renault 16

Rank: Renault 16 (7/12)



  1. I find it rather amusing to speak to unsolicited callers in a somewhat disrespectful manner and then make them end the call. Here's how one went recently: *ring ring*. "Hello?" "Oh hello, it's about your recent accident". "You fucking stupid cunt! You made me stand up!" "I beg your pardon? That's very rude" "I was in the middle of something, you cocksucker. If you don't like the way the call is going I suggest you hang up".
  2. The junction for the M62 from the A1 at Castleford is like that, as is the entrance to the M6 Toll from the M6 westbound.
  3. ...but I see you at least got a couple of Jubilee clips out of the deal. Save those!
  4. Just to raise the bar back to 'horrendous', the motor trader friend I mentioned above once bought a Metro that had been in a BIG side impact with a motorcycle that had completely smashed in the driver's side of the car. He tacked a cover sill over the buckled one, held a door into the aperture and tack welded it into position then put a big baggy seat cover on the driver's seat to conceal the buckled floorpan. Into the auction it went, with 'drivers door does not open' in the description.
  5. My brother once bought a Hillman Avenger from a bombsite car trader known as 'OneEye' only to discover the front wings had been repaired with asphalt. It was a 1500HL and for some reason went like the fucking wind.
  6. But you could park loads of LDV Convoys on it and then it would look BOSS.
  7. My employer's offices have aircon controllers like that in the meeting rooms. I suspect there's a trick to them, because one of our super-brainy consultants spent ages fucking with one and the meeting room was at 24C by the time we were done. The next time, a colleague managed to get the room like an ice box. This is one of the reasons why I hardly ever go to the office.
  8. Just remembered another story about my pal the dodgy motor trader. I was loitering outside another traders premises one morning when I spotted him in his smiley Transit beavertail and he pulled over for a chat. He had an absolutely hanging Maxi loaded on the back covered in moss with holes in the scuttle you could have put your hand through. I asked him if he was on his way to weigh it in and he laughed and told me it was going in that night's auction at Eastbourne and he'd pop back with it later to show me. Sure enough, he reappeared that afternoon with the car sporting a fresh coat of paint concealing a ton of wag that he'd shovelled into the holey panels. I'd watched him using body filler before, and he was so skilled with it that it only needed the smallest amount of sanding down. Caveat emptor!
  9. I used to hear about people quieting noisy gearboxes by adding a nylon shirt, but have never seen it done. I can't even remember the last time I saw a nylon shirt, for that matter. Lots of rwd gearboxes used to feature postcard-sized cover plates held down by half a dozen bolts. I'd imagine if you popped one of those off you could insert all kinds of nefarious temporary cures. Either that, or remove the gearshift assembly and stuff it in that way.
  10. My boss used to buy some right shit out of that place to fill up his px cheapies section, but apart from various clonks and howling wheel bearings they usually drove ok. I remember one that had a tremendously noisy autobox that sounded like it was full of shrapnel attempting to batter its way through the casing and I had to knock it into neutral upon spotting a police motorcyclist and coast past him in case the racket should excite his curiousity and result in him discovering that I was not displaying my trade plates (which were usually tossed in the back so I didn't have to worry about them flying off en route)
  11. Eastbourne auction used to sell delicious egg & bacon sandwiches, served by the lovely Claire from a greasy kiosk. It was such a shame when they moved to posh new premises.
  12. Shoreham auction was well known for having terrible entries, to the extent that the traders I knew wouldn't buy stock there but would occasionally visit just for fun. It's also the place where I saw the only Alfa 6 I've ever seen in the metal. It made £50 and to my chagrin as a skint student I didn't have £50. Probably dodged a bullet there, in retrospect.
  13. Concealing horrendous faults on cars sent to auction used to be considered a bit of a game in the motor trade in the 80s and it was regarded as a bit of fun to be left holding the baby and having to come up with a wheeze to get rid of it. I was friendly at the time with a well-dodgy trader who was regarded as an expert at the game, once memorably selling an engineless Renault 8 by pushing it through the sale whilst laughing with the crowd about how the fucking thing had picked a bad moment to run out of petrol. (This is one reason why private purchasers need to be very careful when bidding at auctions).
  14. I reckon it's their 3/8" model, which does 8-105Nm. Stretch bolts. They're usually single use. I think that might be the problem. You might also want to blow the holes out with compressed air if possible.
  15. Sounds like they had either been overtightened or assembled with lots if thread lock. At 22nm you would be pulling the wrench with one finger.
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