Station

Gr8 handling cars, mine really surprised me.
I never really fancied 911's growing up, just 924's and 944's.

Had a dream last night I had a huge workshop at the back of my garage. Never new this way here, was so chuffed to find it. It was full of engineering equipment, including a strange mechanical device that was controlled by a lever. It was roof mounted like one of those rafter cranes. I was moving the handle and it was doing all manner of random movements. I then realised the handle was a sheet metal shear, and nearly sliced my hand off. There were toilets in the back. There was random graffiti from the 80's on them. The toilets were full of sandstone dust from the walls. I though this workshop was awesome, but then reminded myself it is obviously a dream.
I heard a bang outside. I went to investigate and there there were a group of students kicking the metal shutters. I said 'hey knock that off'. One lad said 'well at least I don't have breasts'. I looked down and realise I had big man boobs with pointy nipples. I said 'right that's it' and my punches glanced off this lads face. I then got him in a choke hold on the floor and held him squirming for about five minutes. His student friends sat around talking and I felt a bit stupid so I said 'ok that's enough' and we stood up and I patted him on the back.
I then went to a garden centre. I was wheeling about on a trolley, when an attractive black woman passed me. I small talked her with double entendres (unfortunately I can't remember them otherwise I'd use them in future), and she said 'wow, you're such a babe' to me. I then woke myself up because I knew I was dreaming!
 
Bollocks to my stupid auto-terminate dream recognition brain!

I've had a proper drought on the dream front. I think I'm having them but not remembering them.
I wish I didn't have this one last night.
Outside mums house. There's a very big (6 inches) daddy long legs spider next to front door. It didn't bother me as DLL don't have the scary legs and massive body.
Pointed out another spider to my brother which had a weird round body. He somehow collected it up in a glass and put it into a glass tank in the driveway which had gerbils in.
By this time the spider is about ten inches wide. Gerbils are unhappy with their new lodger, they're going mad, trying to jump out. This is upsetting horrible large spider, which then starts flinging itself around the tank. The whole tank is moving because it's so big.
I move away from the tank, and the frigging thing jumps out and lands on my shoulder.
I say to my nephew 'it's on my shoulder isn't it?' I'm trying to brush it off but it's clinging onto me.
 
I wake up sweating and start hitting my shoulder!! Horrible!

I've done it loads but not without my bumhole doing the boogaloo whenever any newish BMW/Volvo appeared in the rear view mirror on the motorway.

It's a Graham NobGoblin.

It's a Wilson FartBlanket Ghia.

It's a Munter Fromage GX.

It's a Munter Fromage GX.

It's a Munter Fromage GX.

It should be a legal requirement as part of Autoshite membership you get that Cortina tattooed on your forearm.

Collecting with a dust pan and brush no doubt. Get it weighed in lad.
 
http://www.ebay.co.uk/ulk/itm/151892441840

Apart from using a James Bind style swivelling numberpkate (UK to PL), just avoid London if you don't live/work there. It's just not that good.

Imagine the horrors of complete engine failure because the windscreen wiper got jammed on a twig.

Imagine the horrors of complete engine failure because the windscreen wiper got jammed on a twig.

Had a dream I was snorting cocaine with Brad from Neighbours. When I say snorting cocaine, I mean burying my head in a small hill of cocaine and having my entire face covered in it.

In my garage, and I'm under instruction from Quincy ME that he needs to be smuggled out of my garage in the boot of an old early 90s Ford Mustang. I see Aston across the road in a Mondeo with tinted windows, he's checking on Quincy.
It was metallic red with a white convertible roof and white leather inside. There's a digital display relating to the air con on the centre console, I'm switching through, there's about one hundred or more settings to the LCD, there's countless settings and it takes me ages to go through them. One says 'Frozen', 'warm', 'outside', several are strange hyroglyphs and symbols, and one setting is named 'bollocks'. Behind the buttons is a small glovebox, inside is a piece of formed foam, I realise this glovebox is used to store this foam.
 
I'm backing the mustang into my garage and realise Quincy and his assistant Sam are loading medical equipment into a scrap BMW 5 series which belongs to the fellow over the road. It has been banger raced prepped, Quincy then climbs into the boot and Sam shuts it behind him. I wonder what's going on at this point. My mum appears and says 'ooh it's lovely isn't it' and asks if it's a Lancaster Bomber and I say no it's a Ford Mustang. (Roll eyes, women!)

Third time I've had this dream - find myself in my ex's house, usually in the loft and always taking stuff that belongs to me, but not stealing, but shouldn't be there. Hear her coming up the path and frantically leave through the back door, and escape along the side of the street. Never been caught but last nights dream I hear her says she's spotted me repeatedly and I scarper up the street, and then I woke myself up.
No idea why I'm having the same dream over and over again - there's nothing in the house that I want back.

Had a dream Richard from Keeping Up Appearances was showing me the 'beauty' of the mechanism of an old 80's metallic red Rover/Jaguar door lock mechanism. The car was parked outside the shops on the pavement outside the shops near me. (right in the centre here)
I was lying on top of the car (on the roof), and I remember Richard had the key in the lock turning it but it was stiff. He was saying 'Listen to how beautiful this locking mechanism sounds'. As I was lying down I put my ear to the corner of the roof to hear it reverberate and it make this heinously bad crunching sound that sounded like a seized locking mechanism breaking. He loved it though, and I was pretending to agree it was really nice.

I had a dream recently I bought a kit car. The morning after I looked of the upstairs window in my mum and dads bedroom and it was a hollowed out log, the wheels where logs cut in cross sections. I remember looking admiring the shape, I never questioned whether this was normal.

I was sat in the middle of extremely heavy traffic on the motorway with my entire family - I was towing a missile, and decided to fire it. I launched it off, it shot up about two foot with a bang, and just landed in the floor. I told everybody to take cover, and leapt behind the Armco, which was about four foot from the missile.
i was then in a jet fighter and the wings had clear plastic bottles filled with diluted orange cordial. My mum told me the idea was to drop them and then shoot them just before they hit the floor and they would explode.i did this near some soldiers and shot a bottle but it just landed on the floor, leaking orange everywhere.

Had a dream the other night I was in one of the houses out of Fallout 4 and had this massive cigar. I've always wanted to smoke one but never have, the proper Cuban ones, they look amazing and people on the telly look like they're really enjoying them, but they're probably hideous.
Jon 'Dugong' was there and we were sat at a battered garden table and he bet me I wouldn't smoke it all or he would have to smoke it.
I then woke up and drove to work.
And then I actually woke up and drove to work but realised it was Saturday.
But then I really did wake up and it was Monday and I went to work! Frigging weird, never had a dream within a dream within a dream before.

Effective post-apocalyptic ruins photo:
 

Just picturing Billy sat on his arse hanging on to a tow rope at the back of his house ordering his son not to go to fast.

Imagine the horrors of complete engine failure because the windscreen wiper got jammed on a twig.

Imagine the horrors of complete engine failure because the windscreen wiper got jammed on a twig.