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Des last won the day on July 19 2013

Des had the most liked content!

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About Des

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    Rank: Renault 16

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    old cars, grumble.


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  1. 14 Mpg, it would appear you've not got a single sticky caliper and the engine is in good tune. Best pop matching tyres on your rear before the viscous coupling shits its guts.
  2. Best plate position I can see is at the bottom, although it will be vulnerable, but if you hang it from a couple of hinges not so bad, and it will also disappear from view when you're in motion.
  3. The gearboxes were certainly more audible once the front floorpans had disintegrated.
  4. As did Vanette and Bristol, those vehicle designers do like a good honk on the crack pipe.
  5. Des

    The grumpy thread

    Take along two buckets to the interview, you won't be considered qualified for anything else.
  6. The only wax rustproofers I've had any success with have been rattle cans, bought plenty of proper treatments and not one has been the slightest help as they're all sat in a shed, fuck that messy shit for a game of soldiers. The spray cans get to be used and beat good intentions easily. Vactan is awesome, this is a picture of some Datsun. It sprouted a hole too big for a bit of tape and I carried out a disgustingly lazy and rushed patch job, put less time into it than cutting my toenails and sploshed on some Vactan, this was 3 or maybe more years ago and look at it now. Someday I'll bare metal a car and spray it in the stuff.
  7. I chanced an aluminium rad for an old Rangerover, cheaper than the cheapest of conventional replacements with their nasty crimped on plastic tanks, I examined it carefully and was rather impressed by the quality of build, very nice solid thing, only issue for me was having to adapt one of the two oil coolers which had the wrong connections. They all seem to be multicored for greater efficiency so acquiring the same acreage might not be critical, if you get it wrong you could always sell on to the driftYo boys as a sick ass wicked intercooler bro for an obscene profit.
  8. Des

    The grumpy thread

    Mount an aroogah horn in the glovebox and wire it to the brake light switch. Use a relay. And a fuse.
  9. Des

    The grumpy thread

    Many years ago a twat left a car in my yard 'just for the night' and after an eternity I needed to drag it onto the Queens highway, on my tod in the pissing rain and challenged by steering lock and flat tyres I had to cut the seatbelts for towropes and pull the back seat for a buffer. I was the bad guy and it seemed that I might never hear the end of it. If there's ever a next time, I'll cut the offending vehicle in half to make it easier to handle.
  10. Why employ two vehicles where one can suffice? https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/2018-Piaggio-Ape-10-MILES-ONLY-2-door-Van/273034996752?_trkparms=aid%3D777003%26algo%3DDISCL.MBE%26ao%3D2%26asc%3D20160608105753%26meid%3D9665473a514144ae9276da1b80d78f3a%26pid%3D100012%26rk%3D2%26rkt%3D12%26mehot%3Dpp%26sd%3D253834475697%26itm%3D273034996752&_trksid=p2047675.c100012.m1985 Although a Spanish reg could be useful here, sport moustache and answer any rozzer challenge by repeating que??? They'll soon get bored and leave.
  11. Des

    Ask a Shiter

    My trailer now has a new master fitted, bled itself from lots of pumping and leaving the handbrake applied overnight, no signs of leaks on the backplates and working very well, so I stupidly looked inside the drums. Linings declinings, I did wonder what age this trailer, Escort looking shoes would place it in the age of Dagenhams pinnacle of dustbin production, but when I double checked against internet piccys, they're subtly different, looks like they're early Cortina, fecking things older than myself, anyone recognise them? 9'' drum, I've gambled a tenner on a set already so hopefully I've guessed right.
  12. Des

    The grumpy thread

    Pop dog into the boot in future, saves grief.
  13. Des

    Fuck you scene tax

    I think about £100 was what a breaker quoted me, although some years ago, I wouldn't give that for a minty new one never mind some old sun bleached brittle tat that'll likely shatter should a midge fart in its direction. If you can grab that one in the yard for under a score it should be easy ebay money, but maybe not worth the grief.
  14. Des

    Fuck you scene tax

    Hey scene tax I'm back, and this time I'm bringing out the gimp. those black plastic valance things that go under the front bumper and around the corners, air dams or spoilers, whatever they're called made up of sections, well I've always had two pieces missing, one from the middle and one from the nearside. Fixed the middle one easily by moving the number plate over the gap but for the side one, well we're looking at three figures for utter tat replacements so the logical approach would be to kick off the remaining bits, only I found something close off God knows what in a ditch, but it's 4'' short. Now I just need a piece of black plastic to bridge the gap, hello Halfords toolbox. Much better, as time passes the placcy bits take on more of a structural role, and that Halfords section has a lifetime guarantee.
  15. Would it be possible to engineer scrolling brake lights that follow a circle counter rotating? And hang on some nipple tassles.
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