r.welfare

TRX was meant to be a complete wheel and tyre concept wasn't it? Ford flirted with it on the Mk2 Granada and Mk3 Mustang.
 
I prefer the looks of the Ambassador to the Princess, deride me.

Yes, I use it every year on my wife's Avensis at MOT time (the car has a partially blocked pair of cats in the manifold so the engine light is on all the time, I can't justify the £400+ replacement cost).  Bung it in on a low tank (< 1/4 full), Italian tune-up, knock out the engine light with a code reader as I get to the MOT station, job done.

Thin reminds me of a time our lass was showing me how to set up the sewing machine so i could repair the hole in the pocket lining of my work trousers. She got it threaded and was setting up the foot or whatever it is, and she turned round to see me looking at a youtube clip of a dancing gerbil on my phone and went ape shit. WTF? Women man.

It's been four and a half years since I last did this, but today I went on a trip to collect a car.
 

Reading station, 5pm.  Smelly Festivalgoers out of shot.
 

Paddington, 5.30pm.  Heading towards the Circle and Hammersmith & City Lines, to then change at Kings Cross for the Northern Line.  Never realised it was such a hike.  Citroen H van-mounted coffee vendor might be in shot.
 

6.30pm.  That there North London.  The wilds of Zone 4.  Totteridge to be exact.
 

7.30pm.  M4.  You might be able to make out the car is very low-geared - that's about 65mph at 3,000rpm.
 

8.15pm.  Home.  It's an imaginatively-named Mazda MPV.  Let me state here and now that I only have one child and therefore don't really need a 7-seater.  But we've got some DIY jobs coming up and clearing my in-laws house, so it will come in useful.  And it was damn cheap, considering it has 5 days shy of a year's ticket. 
 
Admiral obligingly set me up with a multicar policy that became almost disgustingly cheap when I complained about having a premium hike due to a non-fault accident (cf. Avensis, last year) that we didn't even claim on our policy for.  The lovely Welsh lass on the phone mirrored the 12 years NCB from the Honda onto this.  Interestingly, that newfangled DVLA MOT and tax checker site also says it's taxed until 31 January, even though there's no disc in the car.  So I was able to cruise home without worrying about ANPR.  No pez station shot because it actually had 1/2 a tank in.
 
Aside from the low gearing it drives pretty damn well.  "It's only got one advisory for a slight exhaust blow", the old boy selling it bellowed at me as the Mazda idled on his drive like a Lancaster bomber, "it's on the join, it just needs tightening up".  Hmm.  We'll see about that.  It does quieten down when warm though.  2-litre petrol in this one, same as the 626.  That explains the low gearing, it's only got 130bhp to propel nearly 2 tons.
 
Of course, there are a number of reasons why it was cheap.  There's no history whatsoever, although the V5 states only 2 owners from new and the last had it 10 years.  Therefore I'm playing cambelt roulette until my nerve goes.  Then there's this:
 

 
My crap photography shouldn't mask the fact the nearside rear wheelarch is right of shape.  Also the sliding door on that side is badly dented.  If it's a long-term keeper I'll try and score a secondhand replacement, hopefully in the same colour.
 
Then, because Mazda, there is of course this:
 

 
I managed to peel a load of the lip away by hand.  Anyone in the Home Counties good at welding and fancy earning some ££ if I bring it to your magic tickling stick?  Let me know.  I'll even do all the stripping and prep.
 

 
Inside it's quite nice.  The old boy said "Oh yeah, the aircon works" but buggered if I believe him.  I do reckon the pollen filter is absolutely clogged as the air throughput is shite, will need to check that out tomorrow.  The a/c light does come on when you press the button.  It might be low on gas.  It might be buggered.  A visit to Kwik-Fit beckons.  I like the two-tone steering wheel, as it happens.
 

 
Some middle seats.  They are not green - blame my iPhone camera - but a lovely sort of grey mousefur.  I can get the nearest seat's backrest to flip forward but not sure if it's meant to tip.  A handbook is on order from eBay.
 

 
Back seats.  I clambered in through the boot and found that the legroom is OK, although I'm only 5'10" and particularly short in the leg.  You even get separate heat/vent controls in the back here, there are two vents in the roof!!!1!.  They think of everything.  Also I found a bag of mouldy Maltesers in one of the cubbyholes.  I didn't eat them, even though I hadn't had any dinner yet.
 
So there you are.  Immediate plans are:
Put some tax on it Clean and polish it Check the oil, coolant, air filter etc and give it a basic service if required Drive it for a month or so to see if it's alright or not Fit some reversing sensors Have a go at knocking the nearside dent out on the wheelarch Kwik-Fit trip to see if the a/c is really dead Then if it's a keeper:
Cambelt and waterpump Refurb the wheels (maybe) Replace the nearside sliding door Get the wheelarch welded up Think about selling the Accord...  
 
 

It's been four and a half years since I last did this, but today I went on a trip to collect a car.
 

Reading station, 5pm.  Smelly Festivalgoers out of shot.
 

Paddington, 5.30pm.  Heading towards the Circle and Hammersmith & City Lines, to then change at Kings Cross for the Northern Line.  Never realised it was such a hike.  Citroen H van-mounted coffee vendor might be in shot.
 

6.30pm.  That there North London.  The wilds of Zone 4.  Totteridge to be exact.
 

7.30pm.  M4.  You might be able to make out the car is very low-geared - that's about 65mph at 3,000rpm.
 

8.15pm.  Home.  It's an imaginatively-named Mazda MPV.  Let me state here and now that I only have one child and therefore don't really need a 7-seater.  But we've got some DIY jobs coming up and clearing my in-laws house, so it will come in useful.  And it was damn cheap, considering it has 5 days shy of a year's ticket. 
 
Admiral obligingly set me up with a multicar policy that became almost disgustingly cheap when I complained about having a premium hike due to a non-fault accident (cf. Avensis, last year) that we didn't even claim on our policy for.  The lovely Welsh lass on the phone mirrored the 12 years NCB from the Honda onto this.  Interestingly, that newfangled DVLA MOT and tax checker site also says it's taxed until 31 January, even though there's no disc in the car.  So I was able to cruise home without worrying about ANPR.  No pez station shot because it actually had 1/2 a tank in.
 
Aside from the low gearing it drives pretty damn well.  "It's only got one advisory for a slight exhaust blow", the old boy selling it bellowed at me as the Mazda idled on his drive like a Lancaster bomber, "it's on the join, it just needs tightening up".  Hmm.  We'll see about that.  It does quieten down when warm though.  2-litre petrol in this one, same as the 626.  That explains the low gearing, it's only got 130bhp to propel nearly 2 tons.
 
Of course, there are a number of reasons why it was cheap.  There's no history whatsoever, although the V5 states only 2 owners from new and the last had it 10 years.  Therefore I'm playing cambelt roulette until my nerve goes.  Then there's this:
 

 
My crap photography shouldn't mask the fact the nearside rear wheelarch is right of shape.  Also the sliding door on that side is badly dented.  If it's a long-term keeper I'll try and score a secondhand replacement, hopefully in the same colour.
 
Then, because Mazda, there is of course this:
 

 
I managed to peel a load of the lip away by hand.  Anyone in the Home Counties good at welding and fancy earning some ££ if I bring it to your magic tickling stick?  Let me know.  I'll even do all the stripping and prep.
 

 
Inside it's quite nice.  The old boy said "Oh yeah, the aircon works" but buggered if I believe him.  I do reckon the pollen filter is absolutely clogged as the air throughput is shite, will need to check that out tomorrow.  The a/c light does come on when you press the button.  It might be low on gas.  It might be buggered.  A visit to Kwik-Fit beckons.  I like the two-tone steering wheel, as it happens.
 

 
Some middle seats.  They are not green - blame my iPhone camera - but a lovely sort of grey mousefur.  I can get the nearest seat's backrest to flip forward but not sure if it's meant to tip.  A handbook is on order from eBay.
 

 
Back seats.  I clambered in through the boot and found that the legroom is OK, although I'm only 5'10" and particularly short in the leg.  You even get separate heat/vent controls in the back here, there are two vents in the roof!!!1!.  They think of everything.  Also I found a bag of mouldy Maltesers in one of the cubbyholes.  I didn't eat them, even though I hadn't had any dinner yet.
 
So there you are.  Immediate plans are:
Put some tax on it Clean and polish it Check the oil, coolant, air filter etc and give it a basic service if required Drive it for a month or so to see if it's alright or not Fit some reversing sensors Have a go at knocking the nearside dent out on the wheelarch Kwik-Fit trip to see if the a/c is really dead Then if it's a keeper:
Cambelt and waterpump Refurb the wheels (maybe) Replace the nearside sliding door Get the wheelarch welded up Think about selling the Accord...  
 
 

They're the right way up on a normal computer. I'm awaiting the offer of a staff photographer gig on Barefoot's Veedub rag.

The only thing Mrs W wears when cars are involved is a withering facial expression.

The only thing Mrs W wears when cars are involved is a withering facial expression.

I might "do a Partridge" on one of the seats tomorrow with my finger to see if it works, then photograph the results for posterity.

I might "do a Partridge" on one of the seats tomorrow with my finger to see if it works, then photograph the results for posterity.

It's been four and a half years since I last did this, but today I went on a trip to collect a car.
 

Reading station, 5pm.  Smelly Festivalgoers out of shot.
 

Paddington, 5.30pm.  Heading towards the Circle and Hammersmith & City Lines, to then change at Kings Cross for the Northern Line.  Never realised it was such a hike.  Citroen H van-mounted coffee vendor might be in shot.
 

6.30pm.  That there North London.  The wilds of Zone 4.  Totteridge to be exact.
 

7.30pm.  M4.  You might be able to make out the car is very low-geared - that's about 65mph at 3,000rpm.
 

8.15pm.  Home.  It's an imaginatively-named Mazda MPV.  Let me state here and now that I only have one child and therefore don't really need a 7-seater.  But we've got some DIY jobs coming up and clearing my in-laws house, so it will come in useful.  And it was damn cheap, considering it has 5 days shy of a year's ticket. 
 
Admiral obligingly set me up with a multicar policy that became almost disgustingly cheap when I complained about having a premium hike due to a non-fault accident (cf. Avensis, last year) that we didn't even claim on our policy for.  The lovely Welsh lass on the phone mirrored the 12 years NCB from the Honda onto this.  Interestingly, that newfangled DVLA MOT and tax checker site also says it's taxed until 31 January, even though there's no disc in the car.  So I was able to cruise home without worrying about ANPR.  No pez station shot because it actually had 1/2 a tank in.
 
Aside from the low gearing it drives pretty damn well.  "It's only got one advisory for a slight exhaust blow", the old boy selling it bellowed at me as the Mazda idled on his drive like a Lancaster bomber, "it's on the join, it just needs tightening up".  Hmm.  We'll see about that.  It does quieten down when warm though.  2-litre petrol in this one, same as the 626.  That explains the low gearing, it's only got 130bhp to propel nearly 2 tons.
 
Of course, there are a number of reasons why it was cheap.  There's no history whatsoever, although the V5 states only 2 owners from new and the last had it 10 years.  Therefore I'm playing cambelt roulette until my nerve goes.  Then there's this:
 

 
My crap photography shouldn't mask the fact the nearside rear wheelarch is right of shape.  Also the sliding door on that side is badly dented.  If it's a long-term keeper I'll try and score a secondhand replacement, hopefully in the same colour.
 
Then, because Mazda, there is of course this:
 

 
I managed to peel a load of the lip away by hand.  Anyone in the Home Counties good at welding and fancy earning some ££ if I bring it to your magic tickling stick?  Let me know.  I'll even do all the stripping and prep.
 

 
Inside it's quite nice.  The old boy said "Oh yeah, the aircon works" but buggered if I believe him.  I do reckon the pollen filter is absolutely clogged as the air throughput is shite, will need to check that out tomorrow.  The a/c light does come on when you press the button.  It might be low on gas.  It might be buggered.  A visit to Kwik-Fit beckons.  I like the two-tone steering wheel, as it happens.
 

 
Some middle seats.  They are not green - blame my iPhone camera - but a lovely sort of grey mousefur.  I can get the nearest seat's backrest to flip forward but not sure if it's meant to tip.  A handbook is on order from eBay.
 

 
Back seats.  I clambered in through the boot and found that the legroom is OK, although I'm only 5'10" and particularly short in the leg.  You even get separate heat/vent controls in the back here, there are two vents in the roof!!!1!.  They think of everything.  Also I found a bag of mouldy Maltesers in one of the cubbyholes.  I didn't eat them, even though I hadn't had any dinner yet.
 
So there you are.  Immediate plans are:
Put some tax on it Clean and polish it Check the oil, coolant, air filter etc and give it a basic service if required Drive it for a month or so to see if it's alright or not Fit some reversing sensors Have a go at knocking the nearside dent out on the wheelarch Kwik-Fit trip to see if the a/c is really dead Then if it's a keeper:
Cambelt and waterpump Refurb the wheels (maybe) Replace the nearside sliding door Get the wheelarch welded up Think about selling the Accord...  
 
 

Welcome to the first meeting of the Accrington Minibus Massive.

At the back of the room you will find some sandwiches.. bit of an issue with the cheese and ham, but help yourself to the loaf of bread.

Today the founder, only member and runner up in the AMM sexiest man poll - The Moog, is going to present us with a special slide show.

Over to you Mr Moog

Thank you Mr Moog.

A couple of days ago a tantalising beast was advertised for sale on AS - a 1989 Transit Minibus. After consulting Mrs Moog (who gave it a double thumbs up) Pm's were exchanged and issuance people talked to. Getting minibus insurance was almost impossible, although if I removed the seats it becomes a van and that can be insured. A loophole was found that if the vehicle had only 8 seats then day insurance would be allowance.

After a discussion with Andy, slave labour (aka the apprentice) was offered to help remove the seats and then this happened

All that travel for the princely sum of £16.50. Bargainlicious. First train was a scabby Northern Rail train (no photos as locals werent friendly), but then at Preston I entered the luxurious age of the train

Knowing my journey home may be noisier than a jumbo taking off I travelled in silence

Vistiting the Water Closet found this delightful sign

Speeding through lots of this



Once at Glasgow, one of the famed SVM members met me in the soon to be mine carriage.
Back at the garage everyone couldnt wait to tell me what a great van it was and were even more impressed when I told them I had Missus Moog's blessing.

Seats were attempted to be removed but the floor fixings needed someone underneath to unbolt them. With time at a premium, we decided this turned them into non seats


English cash monies handed over and in return received some page, a key and what was known as The Popemobile. Scottish hospitality was offered and the tank was topped up for free before I left. A really nice gesture

Andy added a finishing touch which turned the bus into even more of a pussy wagon


Journey home was a mix of 80% rain followed by 10% sunshine and 10% inbetween. To add to the fun factor side gusts of wind meant some lane tango would happen if not paying attention.



Luckily the noise of the van worked well to keep me awake, in the way that no one sleeps at a motorhead gig. Mind you the stereo goes really loud!

Top speed (no matter what) is indicated 62mph and gps 60mph. That was even downhill foot flat to floor.
The box fitted to the van doesnt suit it for motorways as 1st is not really used, 2nd is good, 3rd is a bit namby pamby and 4th screams at 60.

No diesel needed but i stopped to see if could deal with the noise that sounded like the exhaust about to explode on overrun. So petrol station pic


The journey took around 4 hours, which wasnt too bad

After presenting the beast to Missus Moog, it was met with a smile and then a big discussion about how we could turn it into a camper.

I might "do a Partridge" on one of the seats tomorrow with my finger to see if it works, then photograph the results for posterity.

It's been four and a half years since I last did this, but today I went on a trip to collect a car.
 

Reading station, 5pm.  Smelly Festivalgoers out of shot.
 

Paddington, 5.30pm.  Heading towards the Circle and Hammersmith & City Lines, to then change at Kings Cross for the Northern Line.  Never realised it was such a hike.  Citroen H van-mounted coffee vendor might be in shot.
 

6.30pm.  That there North London.  The wilds of Zone 4.  Totteridge to be exact.
 

7.30pm.  M4.  You might be able to make out the car is very low-geared - that's about 65mph at 3,000rpm.
 

8.15pm.  Home.  It's an imaginatively-named Mazda MPV.  Let me state here and now that I only have one child and therefore don't really need a 7-seater.  But we've got some DIY jobs coming up and clearing my in-laws house, so it will come in useful.  And it was damn cheap, considering it has 5 days shy of a year's ticket. 
 
Admiral obligingly set me up with a multicar policy that became almost disgustingly cheap when I complained about having a premium hike due to a non-fault accident (cf. Avensis, last year) that we didn't even claim on our policy for.  The lovely Welsh lass on the phone mirrored the 12 years NCB from the Honda onto this.  Interestingly, that newfangled DVLA MOT and tax checker site also says it's taxed until 31 January, even though there's no disc in the car.  So I was able to cruise home without worrying about ANPR.  No pez station shot because it actually had 1/2 a tank in.
 
Aside from the low gearing it drives pretty damn well.  "It's only got one advisory for a slight exhaust blow", the old boy selling it bellowed at me as the Mazda idled on his drive like a Lancaster bomber, "it's on the join, it just needs tightening up".  Hmm.  We'll see about that.  It does quieten down when warm though.  2-litre petrol in this one, same as the 626.  That explains the low gearing, it's only got 130bhp to propel nearly 2 tons.
 
Of course, there are a number of reasons why it was cheap.  There's no history whatsoever, although the V5 states only 2 owners from new and the last had it 10 years.  Therefore I'm playing cambelt roulette until my nerve goes.  Then there's this:
 

 
My crap photography shouldn't mask the fact the nearside rear wheelarch is right of shape.  Also the sliding door on that side is badly dented.  If it's a long-term keeper I'll try and score a secondhand replacement, hopefully in the same colour.
 
Then, because Mazda, there is of course this:
 

 
I managed to peel a load of the lip away by hand.  Anyone in the Home Counties good at welding and fancy earning some ££ if I bring it to your magic tickling stick?  Let me know.  I'll even do all the stripping and prep.
 

 
Inside it's quite nice.  The old boy said "Oh yeah, the aircon works" but buggered if I believe him.  I do reckon the pollen filter is absolutely clogged as the air throughput is shite, will need to check that out tomorrow.  The a/c light does come on when you press the button.  It might be low on gas.  It might be buggered.  A visit to Kwik-Fit beckons.  I like the two-tone steering wheel, as it happens.
 

 
Some middle seats.  They are not green - blame my iPhone camera - but a lovely sort of grey mousefur.  I can get the nearest seat's backrest to flip forward but not sure if it's meant to tip.  A handbook is on order from eBay.
 

 
Back seats.  I clambered in through the boot and found that the legroom is OK, although I'm only 5'10" and particularly short in the leg.  You even get separate heat/vent controls in the back here, there are two vents in the roof!!!1!.  They think of everything.  Also I found a bag of mouldy Maltesers in one of the cubbyholes.  I didn't eat them, even though I hadn't had any dinner yet.
 
So there you are.  Immediate plans are:
Put some tax on it Clean and polish it Check the oil, coolant, air filter etc and give it a basic service if required Drive it for a month or so to see if it's alright or not Fit some reversing sensors Have a go at knocking the nearside dent out on the wheelarch Kwik-Fit trip to see if the a/c is really dead Then if it's a keeper:
Cambelt and waterpump Refurb the wheels (maybe) Replace the nearside sliding door Get the wheelarch welded up Think about selling the Accord...  
 
 

It's been four and a half years since I last did this, but today I went on a trip to collect a car.
 

Reading station, 5pm.  Smelly Festivalgoers out of shot.
 

Paddington, 5.30pm.  Heading towards the Circle and Hammersmith & City Lines, to then change at Kings Cross for the Northern Line.  Never realised it was such a hike.  Citroen H van-mounted coffee vendor might be in shot.
 

6.30pm.  That there North London.  The wilds of Zone 4.  Totteridge to be exact.
 

7.30pm.  M4.  You might be able to make out the car is very low-geared - that's about 65mph at 3,000rpm.
 

8.15pm.  Home.  It's an imaginatively-named Mazda MPV.  Let me state here and now that I only have one child and therefore don't really need a 7-seater.  But we've got some DIY jobs coming up and clearing my in-laws house, so it will come in useful.  And it was damn cheap, considering it has 5 days shy of a year's ticket. 
 
Admiral obligingly set me up with a multicar policy that became almost disgustingly cheap when I complained about having a premium hike due to a non-fault accident (cf. Avensis, last year) that we didn't even claim on our policy for.  The lovely Welsh lass on the phone mirrored the 12 years NCB from the Honda onto this.  Interestingly, that newfangled DVLA MOT and tax checker site also says it's taxed until 31 January, even though there's no disc in the car.  So I was able to cruise home without worrying about ANPR.  No pez station shot because it actually had 1/2 a tank in.
 
Aside from the low gearing it drives pretty damn well.  "It's only got one advisory for a slight exhaust blow", the old boy selling it bellowed at me as the Mazda idled on his drive like a Lancaster bomber, "it's on the join, it just needs tightening up".  Hmm.  We'll see about that.  It does quieten down when warm though.  2-litre petrol in this one, same as the 626.  That explains the low gearing, it's only got 130bhp to propel nearly 2 tons.
 
Of course, there are a number of reasons why it was cheap.  There's no history whatsoever, although the V5 states only 2 owners from new and the last had it 10 years.  Therefore I'm playing cambelt roulette until my nerve goes.  Then there's this:
 

 
My crap photography shouldn't mask the fact the nearside rear wheelarch is right of shape.  Also the sliding door on that side is badly dented.  If it's a long-term keeper I'll try and score a secondhand replacement, hopefully in the same colour.
 
Then, because Mazda, there is of course this:
 

 
I managed to peel a load of the lip away by hand.  Anyone in the Home Counties good at welding and fancy earning some ££ if I bring it to your magic tickling stick?  Let me know.  I'll even do all the stripping and prep.
 

 
Inside it's quite nice.  The old boy said "Oh yeah, the aircon works" but buggered if I believe him.  I do reckon the pollen filter is absolutely clogged as the air throughput is shite, will need to check that out tomorrow.  The a/c light does come on when you press the button.  It might be low on gas.  It might be buggered.  A visit to Kwik-Fit beckons.  I like the two-tone steering wheel, as it happens.
 

 
Some middle seats.  They are not green - blame my iPhone camera - but a lovely sort of grey mousefur.  I can get the nearest seat's backrest to flip forward but not sure if it's meant to tip.  A handbook is on order from eBay.
 

 
Back seats.  I clambered in through the boot and found that the legroom is OK, although I'm only 5'10" and particularly short in the leg.  You even get separate heat/vent controls in the back here, there are two vents in the roof!!!1!.  They think of everything.  Also I found a bag of mouldy Maltesers in one of the cubbyholes.  I didn't eat them, even though I hadn't had any dinner yet.
 
So there you are.  Immediate plans are:
Put some tax on it Clean and polish it Check the oil, coolant, air filter etc and give it a basic service if required Drive it for a month or so to see if it's alright or not Fit some reversing sensors Have a go at knocking the nearside dent out on the wheelarch Kwik-Fit trip to see if the a/c is really dead Then if it's a keeper:
Cambelt and waterpump Refurb the wheels (maybe) Replace the nearside sliding door Get the wheelarch welded up Think about selling the Accord...  
 
 

Woof!  Royal Mail and Hermes deliver the goods!  Glad you're collectively happy, chaps.  Hope the Hermes boys enjoyed the gaffer taped boxes (I was out of parcel tape...).

Nice photographs.

It's been four and a half years since I last did this, but today I went on a trip to collect a car.
 

Reading station, 5pm.  Smelly Festivalgoers out of shot.
 

Paddington, 5.30pm.  Heading towards the Circle and Hammersmith & City Lines, to then change at Kings Cross for the Northern Line.  Never realised it was such a hike.  Citroen H van-mounted coffee vendor might be in shot.
 

6.30pm.  That there North London.  The wilds of Zone 4.  Totteridge to be exact.
 

7.30pm.  M4.  You might be able to make out the car is very low-geared - that's about 65mph at 3,000rpm.
 

8.15pm.  Home.  It's an imaginatively-named Mazda MPV.  Let me state here and now that I only have one child and therefore don't really need a 7-seater.  But we've got some DIY jobs coming up and clearing my in-laws house, so it will come in useful.  And it was damn cheap, considering it has 5 days shy of a year's ticket. 
 
Admiral obligingly set me up with a multicar policy that became almost disgustingly cheap when I complained about having a premium hike due to a non-fault accident (cf. Avensis, last year) that we didn't even claim on our policy for.  The lovely Welsh lass on the phone mirrored the 12 years NCB from the Honda onto this.  Interestingly, that newfangled DVLA MOT and tax checker site also says it's taxed until 31 January, even though there's no disc in the car.  So I was able to cruise home without worrying about ANPR.  No pez station shot because it actually had 1/2 a tank in.
 
Aside from the low gearing it drives pretty damn well.  "It's only got one advisory for a slight exhaust blow", the old boy selling it bellowed at me as the Mazda idled on his drive like a Lancaster bomber, "it's on the join, it just needs tightening up".  Hmm.  We'll see about that.  It does quieten down when warm though.  2-litre petrol in this one, same as the 626.  That explains the low gearing, it's only got 130bhp to propel nearly 2 tons.
 
Of course, there are a number of reasons why it was cheap.  There's no history whatsoever, although the V5 states only 2 owners from new and the last had it 10 years.  Therefore I'm playing cambelt roulette until my nerve goes.  Then there's this:
 

 
My crap photography shouldn't mask the fact the nearside rear wheelarch is right of shape.  Also the sliding door on that side is badly dented.  If it's a long-term keeper I'll try and score a secondhand replacement, hopefully in the same colour.
 
Then, because Mazda, there is of course this:
 

 
I managed to peel a load of the lip away by hand.  Anyone in the Home Counties good at welding and fancy earning some ££ if I bring it to your magic tickling stick?  Let me know.  I'll even do all the stripping and prep.
 

 
Inside it's quite nice.  The old boy said "Oh yeah, the aircon works" but buggered if I believe him.  I do reckon the pollen filter is absolutely clogged as the air throughput is shite, will need to check that out tomorrow.  The a/c light does come on when you press the button.  It might be low on gas.  It might be buggered.  A visit to Kwik-Fit beckons.  I like the two-tone steering wheel, as it happens.
 

 
Some middle seats.  They are not green - blame my iPhone camera - but a lovely sort of grey mousefur.  I can get the nearest seat's backrest to flip forward but not sure if it's meant to tip.  A handbook is on order from eBay.
 

 
Back seats.  I clambered in through the boot and found that the legroom is OK, although I'm only 5'10" and particularly short in the leg.  You even get separate heat/vent controls in the back here, there are two vents in the roof!!!1!.  They think of everything.  Also I found a bag of mouldy Maltesers in one of the cubbyholes.  I didn't eat them, even though I hadn't had any dinner yet.
 
So there you are.  Immediate plans are:
Put some tax on it Clean and polish it Check the oil, coolant, air filter etc and give it a basic service if required Drive it for a month or so to see if it's alright or not Fit some reversing sensors Have a go at knocking the nearside dent out on the wheelarch Kwik-Fit trip to see if the a/c is really dead Then if it's a keeper:
Cambelt and waterpump Refurb the wheels (maybe) Replace the nearside sliding door Get the wheelarch welded up Think about selling the Accord...  
 
 

It's been four and a half years since I last did this, but today I went on a trip to collect a car.
 

Reading station, 5pm.  Smelly Festivalgoers out of shot.
 

Paddington, 5.30pm.  Heading towards the Circle and Hammersmith & City Lines, to then change at Kings Cross for the Northern Line.  Never realised it was such a hike.  Citroen H van-mounted coffee vendor might be in shot.
 

6.30pm.  That there North London.  The wilds of Zone 4.  Totteridge to be exact.
 

7.30pm.  M4.  You might be able to make out the car is very low-geared - that's about 65mph at 3,000rpm.
 

8.15pm.  Home.  It's an imaginatively-named Mazda MPV.  Let me state here and now that I only have one child and therefore don't really need a 7-seater.  But we've got some DIY jobs coming up and clearing my in-laws house, so it will come in useful.  And it was damn cheap, considering it has 5 days shy of a year's ticket. 
 
Admiral obligingly set me up with a multicar policy that became almost disgustingly cheap when I complained about having a premium hike due to a non-fault accident (cf. Avensis, last year) that we didn't even claim on our policy for.  The lovely Welsh lass on the phone mirrored the 12 years NCB from the Honda onto this.  Interestingly, that newfangled DVLA MOT and tax checker site also says it's taxed until 31 January, even though there's no disc in the car.  So I was able to cruise home without worrying about ANPR.  No pez station shot because it actually had 1/2 a tank in.
 
Aside from the low gearing it drives pretty damn well.  "It's only got one advisory for a slight exhaust blow", the old boy selling it bellowed at me as the Mazda idled on his drive like a Lancaster bomber, "it's on the join, it just needs tightening up".  Hmm.  We'll see about that.  It does quieten down when warm though.  2-litre petrol in this one, same as the 626.  That explains the low gearing, it's only got 130bhp to propel nearly 2 tons.
 
Of course, there are a number of reasons why it was cheap.  There's no history whatsoever, although the V5 states only 2 owners from new and the last had it 10 years.  Therefore I'm playing cambelt roulette until my nerve goes.  Then there's this:
 

 
My crap photography shouldn't mask the fact the nearside rear wheelarch is right of shape.  Also the sliding door on that side is badly dented.  If it's a long-term keeper I'll try and score a secondhand replacement, hopefully in the same colour.
 
Then, because Mazda, there is of course this:
 

 
I managed to peel a load of the lip away by hand.  Anyone in the Home Counties good at welding and fancy earning some ££ if I bring it to your magic tickling stick?  Let me know.  I'll even do all the stripping and prep.
 

 
Inside it's quite nice.  The old boy said "Oh yeah, the aircon works" but buggered if I believe him.  I do reckon the pollen filter is absolutely clogged as the air throughput is shite, will need to check that out tomorrow.  The a/c light does come on when you press the button.  It might be low on gas.  It might be buggered.  A visit to Kwik-Fit beckons.  I like the two-tone steering wheel, as it happens.
 

 
Some middle seats.  They are not green - blame my iPhone camera - but a lovely sort of grey mousefur.  I can get the nearest seat's backrest to flip forward but not sure if it's meant to tip.  A handbook is on order from eBay.
 

 
Back seats.  I clambered in through the boot and found that the legroom is OK, although I'm only 5'10" and particularly short in the leg.  You even get separate heat/vent controls in the back here, there are two vents in the roof!!!1!.  They think of everything.  Also I found a bag of mouldy Maltesers in one of the cubbyholes.  I didn't eat them, even though I hadn't had any dinner yet.
 
So there you are.  Immediate plans are:
Put some tax on it Clean and polish it Check the oil, coolant, air filter etc and give it a basic service if required Drive it for a month or so to see if it's alright or not Fit some reversing sensors Have a go at knocking the nearside dent out on the wheelarch Kwik-Fit trip to see if the a/c is really dead Then if it's a keeper:
Cambelt and waterpump Refurb the wheels (maybe) Replace the nearside sliding door Get the wheelarch welded up Think about selling the Accord...  
 
 

It's been four and a half years since I last did this, but today I went on a trip to collect a car.
 

Reading station, 5pm.  Smelly Festivalgoers out of shot.
 

Paddington, 5.30pm.  Heading towards the Circle and Hammersmith & City Lines, to then change at Kings Cross for the Northern Line.  Never realised it was such a hike.  Citroen H van-mounted coffee vendor might be in shot.
 

6.30pm.  That there North London.  The wilds of Zone 4.  Totteridge to be exact.
 

7.30pm.  M4.  You might be able to make out the car is very low-geared - that's about 65mph at 3,000rpm.
 

8.15pm.  Home.  It's an imaginatively-named Mazda MPV.  Let me state here and now that I only have one child and therefore don't really need a 7-seater.  But we've got some DIY jobs coming up and clearing my in-laws house, so it will come in useful.  And it was damn cheap, considering it has 5 days shy of a year's ticket. 
 
Admiral obligingly set me up with a multicar policy that became almost disgustingly cheap when I complained about having a premium hike due to a non-fault accident (cf. Avensis, last year) that we didn't even claim on our policy for.  The lovely Welsh lass on the phone mirrored the 12 years NCB from the Honda onto this.  Interestingly, that newfangled DVLA MOT and tax checker site also says it's taxed until 31 January, even though there's no disc in the car.  So I was able to cruise home without worrying about ANPR.  No pez station shot because it actually had 1/2 a tank in.
 
Aside from the low gearing it drives pretty damn well.  "It's only got one advisory for a slight exhaust blow", the old boy selling it bellowed at me as the Mazda idled on his drive like a Lancaster bomber, "it's on the join, it just needs tightening up".  Hmm.  We'll see about that.  It does quieten down when warm though.  2-litre petrol in this one, same as the 626.  That explains the low gearing, it's only got 130bhp to propel nearly 2 tons.
 
Of course, there are a number of reasons why it was cheap.  There's no history whatsoever, although the V5 states only 2 owners from new and the last had it 10 years.  Therefore I'm playing cambelt roulette until my nerve goes.  Then there's this:
 

 
My crap photography shouldn't mask the fact the nearside rear wheelarch is right of shape.  Also the sliding door on that side is badly dented.  If it's a long-term keeper I'll try and score a secondhand replacement, hopefully in the same colour.
 
Then, because Mazda, there is of course this:
 

 
I managed to peel a load of the lip away by hand.  Anyone in the Home Counties good at welding and fancy earning some ££ if I bring it to your magic tickling stick?  Let me know.  I'll even do all the stripping and prep.
 

 
Inside it's quite nice.  The old boy said "Oh yeah, the aircon works" but buggered if I believe him.  I do reckon the pollen filter is absolutely clogged as the air throughput is shite, will need to check that out tomorrow.  The a/c light does come on when you press the button.  It might be low on gas.  It might be buggered.  A visit to Kwik-Fit beckons.  I like the two-tone steering wheel, as it happens.
 

 
Some middle seats.  They are not green - blame my iPhone camera - but a lovely sort of grey mousefur.  I can get the nearest seat's backrest to flip forward but not sure if it's meant to tip.  A handbook is on order from eBay.
 

 
Back seats.  I clambered in through the boot and found that the legroom is OK, although I'm only 5'10" and particularly short in the leg.  You even get separate heat/vent controls in the back here, there are two vents in the roof!!!1!.  They think of everything.  Also I found a bag of mouldy Maltesers in one of the cubbyholes.  I didn't eat them, even though I hadn't had any dinner yet.
 
So there you are.  Immediate plans are:
Put some tax on it Clean and polish it Check the oil, coolant, air filter etc and give it a basic service if required Drive it for a month or so to see if it's alright or not Fit some reversing sensors Have a go at knocking the nearside dent out on the wheelarch Kwik-Fit trip to see if the a/c is really dead Then if it's a keeper:
Cambelt and waterpump Refurb the wheels (maybe) Replace the nearside sliding door Get the wheelarch welded up Think about selling the Accord...  
 
 

It's been four and a half years since I last did this, but today I went on a trip to collect a car.
 

Reading station, 5pm.  Smelly Festivalgoers out of shot.
 

Paddington, 5.30pm.  Heading towards the Circle and Hammersmith & City Lines, to then change at Kings Cross for the Northern Line.  Never realised it was such a hike.  Citroen H van-mounted coffee vendor might be in shot.
 

6.30pm.  That there North London.  The wilds of Zone 4.  Totteridge to be exact.
 

7.30pm.  M4.  You might be able to make out the car is very low-geared - that's about 65mph at 3,000rpm.
 

8.15pm.  Home.  It's an imaginatively-named Mazda MPV.  Let me state here and now that I only have one child and therefore don't really need a 7-seater.  But we've got some DIY jobs coming up and clearing my in-laws house, so it will come in useful.  And it was damn cheap, considering it has 5 days shy of a year's ticket. 
 
Admiral obligingly set me up with a multicar policy that became almost disgustingly cheap when I complained about having a premium hike due to a non-fault accident (cf. Avensis, last year) that we didn't even claim on our policy for.  The lovely Welsh lass on the phone mirrored the 12 years NCB from the Honda onto this.  Interestingly, that newfangled DVLA MOT and tax checker site also says it's taxed until 31 January, even though there's no disc in the car.  So I was able to cruise home without worrying about ANPR.  No pez station shot because it actually had 1/2 a tank in.
 
Aside from the low gearing it drives pretty damn well.  "It's only got one advisory for a slight exhaust blow", the old boy selling it bellowed at me as the Mazda idled on his drive like a Lancaster bomber, "it's on the join, it just needs tightening up".  Hmm.  We'll see about that.  It does quieten down when warm though.  2-litre petrol in this one, same as the 626.  That explains the low gearing, it's only got 130bhp to propel nearly 2 tons.
 
Of course, there are a number of reasons why it was cheap.  There's no history whatsoever, although the V5 states only 2 owners from new and the last had it 10 years.  Therefore I'm playing cambelt roulette until my nerve goes.  Then there's this:
 

 
My crap photography shouldn't mask the fact the nearside rear wheelarch is right of shape.  Also the sliding door on that side is badly dented.  If it's a long-term keeper I'll try and score a secondhand replacement, hopefully in the same colour.
 
Then, because Mazda, there is of course this:
 

 
I managed to peel a load of the lip away by hand.  Anyone in the Home Counties good at welding and fancy earning some ££ if I bring it to your magic tickling stick?  Let me know.  I'll even do all the stripping and prep.
 

 
Inside it's quite nice.  The old boy said "Oh yeah, the aircon works" but buggered if I believe him.  I do reckon the pollen filter is absolutely clogged as the air throughput is shite, will need to check that out tomorrow.  The a/c light does come on when you press the button.  It might be low on gas.  It might be buggered.  A visit to Kwik-Fit beckons.  I like the two-tone steering wheel, as it happens.
 

 
Some middle seats.  They are not green - blame my iPhone camera - but a lovely sort of grey mousefur.  I can get the nearest seat's backrest to flip forward but not sure if it's meant to tip.  A handbook is on order from eBay.
 

 
Back seats.  I clambered in through the boot and found that the legroom is OK, although I'm only 5'10" and particularly short in the leg.  You even get separate heat/vent controls in the back here, there are two vents in the roof!!!1!.  They think of everything.  Also I found a bag of mouldy Maltesers in one of the cubbyholes.  I didn't eat them, even though I hadn't had any dinner yet.
 
So there you are.  Immediate plans are:
Put some tax on it Clean and polish it Check the oil, coolant, air filter etc and give it a basic service if required Drive it for a month or so to see if it's alright or not Fit some reversing sensors Have a go at knocking the nearside dent out on the wheelarch Kwik-Fit trip to see if the a/c is really dead Then if it's a keeper:
Cambelt and waterpump Refurb the wheels (maybe) Replace the nearside sliding door Get the wheelarch welded up Think about selling the Accord...  
 
 

It's been four and a half years since I last did this, but today I went on a trip to collect a car.
 

Reading station, 5pm.  Smelly Festivalgoers out of shot.
 

Paddington, 5.30pm.  Heading towards the Circle and Hammersmith & City Lines, to then change at Kings Cross for the Northern Line.  Never realised it was such a hike.  Citroen H van-mounted coffee vendor might be in shot.
 

6.30pm.  That there North London.  The wilds of Zone 4.  Totteridge to be exact.
 

7.30pm.  M4.  You might be able to make out the car is very low-geared - that's about 65mph at 3,000rpm.
 

8.15pm.  Home.  It's an imaginatively-named Mazda MPV.  Let me state here and now that I only have one child and therefore don't really need a 7-seater.  But we've got some DIY jobs coming up and clearing my in-laws house, so it will come in useful.  And it was damn cheap, considering it has 5 days shy of a year's ticket. 
 
Admiral obligingly set me up with a multicar policy that became almost disgustingly cheap when I complained about having a premium hike due to a non-fault accident (cf. Avensis, last year) that we didn't even claim on our policy for.  The lovely Welsh lass on the phone mirrored the 12 years NCB from the Honda onto this.  Interestingly, that newfangled DVLA MOT and tax checker site also says it's taxed until 31 January, even though there's no disc in the car.  So I was able to cruise home without worrying about ANPR.  No pez station shot because it actually had 1/2 a tank in.
 
Aside from the low gearing it drives pretty damn well.  "It's only got one advisory for a slight exhaust blow", the old boy selling it bellowed at me as the Mazda idled on his drive like a Lancaster bomber, "it's on the join, it just needs tightening up".  Hmm.  We'll see about that.  It does quieten down when warm though.  2-litre petrol in this one, same as the 626.  That explains the low gearing, it's only got 130bhp to propel nearly 2 tons.
 
Of course, there are a number of reasons why it was cheap.  There's no history whatsoever, although the V5 states only 2 owners from new and the last had it 10 years.  Therefore I'm playing cambelt roulette until my nerve goes.  Then there's this:
 

 
My crap photography shouldn't mask the fact the nearside rear wheelarch is right of shape.  Also the sliding door on that side is badly dented.  If it's a long-term keeper I'll try and score a secondhand replacement, hopefully in the same colour.
 
Then, because Mazda, there is of course this:
 

 
I managed to peel a load of the lip away by hand.  Anyone in the Home Counties good at welding and fancy earning some ££ if I bring it to your magic tickling stick?  Let me know.  I'll even do all the stripping and prep.
 

 
Inside it's quite nice.  The old boy said "Oh yeah, the aircon works" but buggered if I believe him.  I do reckon the pollen filter is absolutely clogged as the air throughput is shite, will need to check that out tomorrow.  The a/c light does come on when you press the button.  It might be low on gas.  It might be buggered.  A visit to Kwik-Fit beckons.  I like the two-tone steering wheel, as it happens.
 

 
Some middle seats.  They are not green - blame my iPhone camera - but a lovely sort of grey mousefur.  I can get the nearest seat's backrest to flip forward but not sure if it's meant to tip.  A handbook is on order from eBay.
 

 
Back seats.  I clambered in through the boot and found that the legroom is OK, although I'm only 5'10" and particularly short in the leg.  You even get separate heat/vent controls in the back here, there are two vents in the roof!!!1!.  They think of everything.  Also I found a bag of mouldy Maltesers in one of the cubbyholes.  I didn't eat them, even though I hadn't had any dinner yet.
 
So there you are.  Immediate plans are:
Put some tax on it Clean and polish it Check the oil, coolant, air filter etc and give it a basic service if required Drive it for a month or so to see if it's alright or not Fit some reversing sensors Have a go at knocking the nearside dent out on the wheelarch Kwik-Fit trip to see if the a/c is really dead Then if it's a keeper:
Cambelt and waterpump Refurb the wheels (maybe) Replace the nearside sliding door Get the wheelarch welded up Think about selling the Accord...  
 
 

It's been four and a half years since I last did this, but today I went on a trip to collect a car.
 

Reading station, 5pm.  Smelly Festivalgoers out of shot.
 

Paddington, 5.30pm.  Heading towards the Circle and Hammersmith & City Lines, to then change at Kings Cross for the Northern Line.  Never realised it was such a hike.  Citroen H van-mounted coffee vendor might be in shot.
 

6.30pm.  That there North London.  The wilds of Zone 4.  Totteridge to be exact.
 

7.30pm.  M4.  You might be able to make out the car is very low-geared - that's about 65mph at 3,000rpm.
 

8.15pm.  Home.  It's an imaginatively-named Mazda MPV.  Let me state here and now that I only have one child and therefore don't really need a 7-seater.  But we've got some DIY jobs coming up and clearing my in-laws house, so it will come in useful.  And it was damn cheap, considering it has 5 days shy of a year's ticket. 
 
Admiral obligingly set me up with a multicar policy that became almost disgustingly cheap when I complained about having a premium hike due to a non-fault accident (cf. Avensis, last year) that we didn't even claim on our policy for.  The lovely Welsh lass on the phone mirrored the 12 years NCB from the Honda onto this.  Interestingly, that newfangled DVLA MOT and tax checker site also says it's taxed until 31 January, even though there's no disc in the car.  So I was able to cruise home without worrying about ANPR.  No pez station shot because it actually had 1/2 a tank in.
 
Aside from the low gearing it drives pretty damn well.  "It's only got one advisory for a slight exhaust blow", the old boy selling it bellowed at me as the Mazda idled on his drive like a Lancaster bomber, "it's on the join, it just needs tightening up".  Hmm.  We'll see about that.  It does quieten down when warm though.  2-litre petrol in this one, same as the 626.  That explains the low gearing, it's only got 130bhp to propel nearly 2 tons.
 
Of course, there are a number of reasons why it was cheap.  There's no history whatsoever, although the V5 states only 2 owners from new and the last had it 10 years.  Therefore I'm playing cambelt roulette until my nerve goes.  Then there's this:
 

 
My crap photography shouldn't mask the fact the nearside rear wheelarch is right of shape.  Also the sliding door on that side is badly dented.  If it's a long-term keeper I'll try and score a secondhand replacement, hopefully in the same colour.
 
Then, because Mazda, there is of course this:
 

 
I managed to peel a load of the lip away by hand.  Anyone in the Home Counties good at welding and fancy earning some ££ if I bring it to your magic tickling stick?  Let me know.  I'll even do all the stripping and prep.
 

 
Inside it's quite nice.  The old boy said "Oh yeah, the aircon works" but buggered if I believe him.  I do reckon the pollen filter is absolutely clogged as the air throughput is shite, will need to check that out tomorrow.  The a/c light does come on when you press the button.  It might be low on gas.  It might be buggered.  A visit to Kwik-Fit beckons.  I like the two-tone steering wheel, as it happens.
 

 
Some middle seats.  They are not green - blame my iPhone camera - but a lovely sort of grey mousefur.  I can get the nearest seat's backrest to flip forward but not sure if it's meant to tip.  A handbook is on order from eBay.
 

 
Back seats.  I clambered in through the boot and found that the legroom is OK, although I'm only 5'10" and particularly short in the leg.  You even get separate heat/vent controls in the back here, there are two vents in the roof!!!1!.  They think of everything.  Also I found a bag of mouldy Maltesers in one of the cubbyholes.  I didn't eat them, even though I hadn't had any dinner yet.
 
So there you are.  Immediate plans are:
Put some tax on it Clean and polish it Check the oil, coolant, air filter etc and give it a basic service if required Drive it for a month or so to see if it's alright or not Fit some reversing sensors Have a go at knocking the nearside dent out on the wheelarch Kwik-Fit trip to see if the a/c is really dead Then if it's a keeper:
Cambelt and waterpump Refurb the wheels (maybe) Replace the nearside sliding door Get the wheelarch welded up Think about selling the Accord...  
 
 

I might "do a Partridge" on one of the seats tomorrow with my finger to see if it works, then photograph the results for posterity.

It's been four and a half years since I last did this, but today I went on a trip to collect a car.
 

Reading station, 5pm.  Smelly Festivalgoers out of shot.
 

Paddington, 5.30pm.  Heading towards the Circle and Hammersmith & City Lines, to then change at Kings Cross for the Northern Line.  Never realised it was such a hike.  Citroen H van-mounted coffee vendor might be in shot.
 

6.30pm.  That there North London.  The wilds of Zone 4.  Totteridge to be exact.
 

7.30pm.  M4.  You might be able to make out the car is very low-geared - that's about 65mph at 3,000rpm.
 

8.15pm.  Home.  It's an imaginatively-named Mazda MPV.  Let me state here and now that I only have one child and therefore don't really need a 7-seater.  But we've got some DIY jobs coming up and clearing my in-laws house, so it will come in useful.  And it was damn cheap, considering it has 5 days shy of a year's ticket. 
 
Admiral obligingly set me up with a multicar policy that became almost disgustingly cheap when I complained about having a premium hike due to a non-fault accident (cf. Avensis, last year) that we didn't even claim on our policy for.  The lovely Welsh lass on the phone mirrored the 12 years NCB from the Honda onto this.  Interestingly, that newfangled DVLA MOT and tax checker site also says it's taxed until 31 January, even though there's no disc in the car.  So I was able to cruise home without worrying about ANPR.  No pez station shot because it actually had 1/2 a tank in.
 
Aside from the low gearing it drives pretty damn well.  "It's only got one advisory for a slight exhaust blow", the old boy selling it bellowed at me as the Mazda idled on his drive like a Lancaster bomber, "it's on the join, it just needs tightening up".  Hmm.  We'll see about that.  It does quieten down when warm though.  2-litre petrol in this one, same as the 626.  That explains the low gearing, it's only got 130bhp to propel nearly 2 tons.
 
Of course, there are a number of reasons why it was cheap.  There's no history whatsoever, although the V5 states only 2 owners from new and the last had it 10 years.  Therefore I'm playing cambelt roulette until my nerve goes.  Then there's this:
 

 
My crap photography shouldn't mask the fact the nearside rear wheelarch is right of shape.  Also the sliding door on that side is badly dented.  If it's a long-term keeper I'll try and score a secondhand replacement, hopefully in the same colour.
 
Then, because Mazda, there is of course this:
 

 
I managed to peel a load of the lip away by hand.  Anyone in the Home Counties good at welding and fancy earning some ££ if I bring it to your magic tickling stick?  Let me know.  I'll even do all the stripping and prep.
 

 
Inside it's quite nice.  The old boy said "Oh yeah, the aircon works" but buggered if I believe him.  I do reckon the pollen filter is absolutely clogged as the air throughput is shite, will need to check that out tomorrow.  The a/c light does come on when you press the button.  It might be low on gas.  It might be buggered.  A visit to Kwik-Fit beckons.  I like the two-tone steering wheel, as it happens.
 

 
Some middle seats.  They are not green - blame my iPhone camera - but a lovely sort of grey mousefur.  I can get the nearest seat's backrest to flip forward but not sure if it's meant to tip.  A handbook is on order from eBay.
 

 
Back seats.  I clambered in through the boot and found that the legroom is OK, although I'm only 5'10" and particularly short in the leg.  You even get separate heat/vent controls in the back here, there are two vents in the roof!!!1!.  They think of everything.  Also I found a bag of mouldy Maltesers in one of the cubbyholes.  I didn't eat them, even though I hadn't had any dinner yet.
 
So there you are.  Immediate plans are:
Put some tax on it Clean and polish it Check the oil, coolant, air filter etc and give it a basic service if required Drive it for a month or so to see if it's alright or not Fit some reversing sensors Have a go at knocking the nearside dent out on the wheelarch Kwik-Fit trip to see if the a/c is really dead Then if it's a keeper:
Cambelt and waterpump Refurb the wheels (maybe) Replace the nearside sliding door Get the wheelarch welded up Think about selling the Accord...