Shirley Knott

Not much going on here over the last 3 months. The Clio had some new front pads, and the V70 got an oil and filter change in October. It then spent the festive period hauling Christmad trees around and generally being used as the family van.

I've been looking after my brothers cars as usual (Both Mk1 diesel Octavias, the blue one us a VE ALH 90 TDI, and the silver one an SDI in AQM flavour)

Basically, aside from an indicator that lost its lense, and an upgrade to Osram Nightbreakers on one of them, they've needed nothing.


This one's now approaching 220k miles, illustrating the terrible VAG build quality and reliability that it used to be trendy on here to talk about!
Meanwhile,  today I set about the annual adjustments to the Volvo's handbrake system in preparation for MOT next week.


These are a major week point for the P2 platform across the board, and despite the annual battle to set it up as best as I can, I never escape without and advisory for it.
 
 

Not much going on here over the last 3 months. The Clio had some new front pads, and the V70 got an oil and filter change in October. It then spent the festive period hauling Christmad trees around and generally being used as the family van.

I've been looking after my brothers cars as usual (Both Mk1 diesel Octavias, the blue one us a VE ALH 90 TDI, and the silver one an SDI in AQM flavour)

Basically, aside from an indicator that lost its lense, and an upgrade to Osram Nightbreakers on one of them, they've needed nothing.


This one's now approaching 220k miles, illustrating the terrible VAG build quality and reliability that it used to be trendy on here to talk about!
Meanwhile,  today I set about the annual adjustments to the Volvo's handbrake system in preparation for MOT next week.


These are a major week point for the P2 platform across the board, and despite the annual battle to set it up as best as I can, I never escape without and advisory for it.
 
 

Van is a pure trooper and kept the wet at bay fine on the way home. The cross-climates shod to every corner inspire confidence when navigating sporadic standing water and sloppy surfaces. 

 
 

 

So far, it's been unpeckable as daily transportation. Soon to be pressed into action as a main means of moving home. 
View from collection

Nothing worth BANTZ going on here. Just updating the thread for historical accuracy. 
The Astra sloped off to stay with @Tickman then sauntered swiftly on to @Supernaut.
That left a hole the shape of a car in the transportation section of my virtual filofax. 
Enter, @davehedgehog31 who happened to be vending. All @davehedgehog31 products are pre approved for quality and value so I booked a ticket to Scotland and travelled out during a red weather warning for northern England and Scotland. 

 
This is my regret face approximately 3 or so minutes into the 10 or so hour journey. Wet. 

Yep, quite fond of these.
I served 3.5 years of a 4 year heavy goods fitting apprenticeship for Leyland Daf (Left without getting my papers 😑) and we used to service and look after these as well as selling them new.
I worked on the LDV's and the Daf 45's pretty much exclusively for a good period of time before I was allowed anywhere near the 7.5 ton stuff or anything bigger.
An interesting story is that we used to park them in the workshop over the weekend, and the rear brakes/handbrake would somehow lock up even in that short period of time.... It used to be my job the bray the rear wheels with a hammer on Monday morning to free them off and get them reversed off the pits!
 
 

Yep, quite fond of these.
I served 3.5 years of a 4 year heavy goods fitting apprenticeship for Leyland Daf (Left without getting my papers 😑) and we used to service and look after these as well as selling them new.
I worked on the LDV's and the Daf 45's pretty much exclusively for a good period of time before I was allowed anywhere near the 7.5 ton stuff or anything bigger.
An interesting story is that we used to park them in the workshop over the weekend, and the rear brakes/handbrake would somehow lock up even in that short period of time.... It used to be my job the bray the rear wheels with a hammer on Monday morning to free them off and get them reversed off the pits!
 
 

Yep, quite fond of these.
I served 3.5 years of a 4 year heavy goods fitting apprenticeship for Leyland Daf (Left without getting my papers 😑) and we used to service and look after these as well as selling them new.
I worked on the LDV's and the Daf 45's pretty much exclusively for a good period of time before I was allowed anywhere near the 7.5 ton stuff or anything bigger.
An interesting story is that we used to park them in the workshop over the weekend, and the rear brakes/handbrake would somehow lock up even in that short period of time.... It used to be my job the bray the rear wheels with a hammer on Monday morning to free them off and get them reversed off the pits!
 
 

Amazingly that's the inlet valve that's burnt. File that under "there's your problem".
Not the end of the world, all parts to get it back on the road is around £75 which includes an oil and coolant change.

Bye bye nugget!

That leaves just the Swedish trio of the C70, 240 and Amazon. 
Not much to say on the C70 front. Still just goes, and is the perfect winter car. 
The 240 has been in the naughty corner since around April this year as I couldn't get to the bottom of the random misfiring issue. As you'd expect it's only after replacing pretty much everything else that I narrowed it down to one cylinder that seems to give strangely different compression readings depending on the phase of the moon, and when the HT lead is plugged in for that cylinder the whole car shakes like mad.
Of course I knew I'd have to take the head off and see what the valves are like, but I decided to clear the decks first and get the Amazon on the road. Basically I had a full calendar of displacement activities.
Today I decided to crack on, and I'm not sure why I avoided this job. Looking at the timestamps on my photos, I started at 1515 and had the head on the floor at 1556.  Redblocks are so good to work on it puts everything else to shame.
Setting the crank to TDC and undoing the tensioner. Right as expected the tensioner spring flew into a garden a few streets away.

Cam cover and sprocket off, manifolds off.

Only two wires to unplug, and well that's it.

Let's have a look.
HG looks absolutely fine.

And the valves.

Well there we go. #3 is indeed doing very little in the way of actual work. 
The cams are fine, the clearances are spot on. The next step is to remove the valves and see what's going on.
 
 

Summary of progress repairing the 240 is as follows.

My patience has run out a few times with it, but the abridged version is this:
- Ignition was checked over again, this time with a new timing light and a spark test light. The flutter I was seeing in the ignition before was definitely a problem with the previous timing light, because it's absolutely rock solid now. 
- Compression test was redone. All cylinders bar #3 were at 175.

#3 was a little down but not by much.

So 160, which is still within the tolerance. Cue rather a lot of chin stroking and 'fur fuck sakes' hissed into the air.
- I unplugged each HT lead one by one while the engine was running. With #1 and #2 unplugged, you could clearly still hear the misfire in the randomness of the exhaust note.  However, with #3 unplugged it settled down to running on 3, but in a very regular beat.  AHA!  At this point I can zone in on the fuel, spark and air to this cylinder.
- I swapped the injector lines over between #4 and #3 to see if it was a fuel problem. It isn't.
- I swapped the HT leads over from another cylinder. No change.
This is really odd. Time to get serious.

So my current thinking is that #3 is either leaking air or there's a valve problem.  In the process of doing the compression test I noticed that the spark plug thread was a bit shit. It's possible that the plug isn't seating properly, or is leaking at random intervals.  My next job will be to stack some copper washers and see if messing with the seal improves anything.
If not, I think I'm back at looking at pulling the head and having a look at the valves.
I also noticed that some of the paintwork I did last year is starting to craze. I have no idea what's going on with that.

While this was all happening I started to have the urge to sell the C70 as I haven't been driving it.  So I did the logical thing and taxed, insured, and kicked the absolute fuck out of it, causing me to not want to part with it.

The 205 keeps 205ing. It was whining a bit from the left rear, which give me an excuse to build up my birthday present from @MrsJuular and fix the wheel bearing.

Smoll car goes places:





It is with a lump in my throat that I announce this cheery little nugget may be for sale soon.

Sorting the 240s misfire before it goes to FOTU isn't going particularly well.
I replaced all of the injector seals and all of the remaining intake gaskets with genuine parts. Still running like shit.
I checked the valve clearances.

 
Everything was spot on.
I checked the fuel pressures. Again. All right on the nose.
I checked the ignition timing. Right where it should be and altering it makes no difference.
I dismantled the KJet system once more and cleaned the life out of it.

 
While doing so I noticed the little filter baskets that sit under the injector banjos here..

 
.. yes this is how small they are! They're all a bit fucked.

 
Thankfully they're available for £1 each.

 
I also thought the airflow plate looked off centre.

 
So I fixed that.

 
After putting all of this back in the car.. no change!
At this point it can only be ignition. I've changed the coil, leads, rotor, cap, spark plugs, and tested all of the wiring to and from the hall sensor and ignition module.
But what else can it be?
I decided to take the distributor apart to have a look. 

 
I can't be sure but I thought one of the advance springs was hanging loose..

 
Did a quick test of the hall sensor and rotor - all fine.
Back in the car.. no fucking change!
Tried yet another coil and a spare set of leads.. nope!
I remembered I had @captain_70stiming light in the car so decided to test the individual HT leads. They all looked to be firing regularly.
I then had one final moment of "what if" and put the timing light clamp over the king lead.
That's it! You can see the misfire clearly as a blink in the light just as it stutters.
At this point it can only be the hall sensor or the ignition module as clearly it's not getting the signal to fire from either of those.
I've ordered a module. Fingers crossed.
 

Sounds like you may have been on the receiving end of a minor hex.
In other news...

Well, bugger.

Yeah, that'll be bust then. 
It was a replacement handle fitted about six years ago, too.

Just sheared off, same as the original.
So now we have a highly creative remote door-pull mechanism install involving shoelaces, operated via the back seat...

Just took it for an 8 mile round trip to the shops and I'm absolutely in love. It's fucking brilliant. I'm not sure what it is but I've not been this excited about a car in a long time.
Loads of character. It eats shit roads, potholes and camber for breakfast. 
Takes real concentration to maintain speed on the corner before a motorway slip road. If you fuck it up then you're joining the slow lane at 45mph. 
The steering is so bizarrely heavy and you're so much smaller than everything else on the road. I'm shocked at how much of a departure it is from the 205. 
I had a gander at the fusebox because Peugeot barely bothered hiding it and there are like 8 fuses total. No rev counter. Exposed metal on the doors. Windscreen wipers are on or off. Nothing in-between. The interior bonnet latch looks like I installed it. 

It's a happy ending with this one. Picked it back up after leaving it with a grown up and it's totally transformed.
New wheel bearing OSF brake line both front calipers both rear wheel cylinders new NS handbrake cable all fully adjusted and bled-up oil change welded-up at OSF rusty bits treated with Vactan, quick blast over with lanolin rustproofing etc wheel alignment Incredibly slow. Handling is bizarre after driving a 205. Sunroof was a bad idea for whoever specced it. Pedals are for children's feet.
BUT....
it rides really well. It will drive for miles just on a whiff of diesel. It fits big lads ™. It works.
Very hard to argue with 70+mpg, £300 insurance, LEZ compliance, mechanically simple, marginally interesting. 

And some close ups...






Interior is needing a good tidy up and you can still get Vauxhall velour mats so they're on the cards later on after I've had an ex-colleague valet it and give it a polish to make it all shiny.

Stopped in on the way home for a quick photo op, same spot many hours later;


and finally, home, I shall have a good look around it tomorrow afternoon work.

Thanks to Les and @Jollyfckr/ @jollyfkr2 for setting the deal up - did it always have just one key or is there the possibility it may resurface?
 

Well, it's not often you're right @sdkrc, but you're wrong again!
I picked up my smelly old friend...

Plus the obligatory:

Half time report from Cambridge Services is that it still pulls very well, the starter mootr sounds rough and there is something very worn on the suspension, possibly the rear, as the car occasionally wants to steer passively. 

I have been without wheels for two weeks since selling the BMW.
Having trawled ebay and marketplace it became apparent everybody believes there car is worth much more than it actually is.
I was looking for a BMW e61 - plenty in budget but too far away geographically. Those closer to home were overpriced for 16 - 17 years old with over 160k - plenty of bork factor. I wanted a six pot diesel - I would never have the awful four cylinder. A few XF jags were in budget but advisories for corrosion put me off.
E91's in my budget were 4 pot petrol and diesel - again overpriced. A lot of the adds made me laugh - pointing out the good bits and at the end of the text chucking in that basically it was fucked.
I looked at A6's/ mondeo - even insignias.
This morning an add popped up on ebay. I made contact with the seller and headed to Bickerstaffe with much haste.
I bought this - 

It's a 2.0 cdti SRI. It's minging inside and out but comes with one of the most comprehensive histories I have seen - the service book is stamped up to 175k. It has just passed 181k. It came with a sheaf of bills and all the books. Clutch replaced 10k ago. Timing belt in 2019. Oil pick up seal done in 2021. Ticket until September '24. Somebody really loved this car despite it now looking like it had been yanked from somebody's ringpiece.
Deal was done. I had insured the BMW with Swinton - it was less than £300.Unbelievably the thieving fagins wanted just short of £700. For an insignia. I have been driving for over 30 years.
They were told what they could do with their quote. Swinton will get no more business from me.
I actually  got a policy for two hundred and odd quid.
I put £30 worth of diesel in the car and headed straight for our caravan.
Observations? It's not quick - more brisk - I am certain it picks up quicker than the mondeo but it has less weight.
Through the new 20 mph zones I can leave it in 3rd - the mondeo needs 2nd. Brakes are sharp but gear change is not ford - smooth and has a bit of throw to get it over to 5th gear.
I have not tested all of the onboard functions cos' I need to read the book.

Filthy. But all the levels are correct and I cannot see oil anywhere.

Did I say it was filthy? And it stinks of cowshit having lived on  a farm. The seat bolsters are intact but the trim at the base of the drivers seat is broken. The aircon does not blow cold - looking through the bills it has been regassed a few times so this suggests it loses pressure over a couple of years.

Boot carpet will need to be removed and cleaned to assist with getting rid of the whiff.

No spare wheel. But bonus breaker bar and adaptor.
I doubt the expensive VXR alloys were standard - the tyres are legal but not for much longer. 
Road tax cost me £35 - much better than the £395 for the BMW.
It needs a monster of a clean and some refrigerant. And a spare key. Given the mileage I won't be putting much money into it and due to this it means when I am done with it I can P/X with no guilt rather than deal with scavengers on tinterweb.
You may be wondering how much the bovine excrement smelling GM chariot cost me?
I paid £2k. The alloys are worth near 50% of that.
There is still the odd bargain but you need to be quick.
It seems that £2k is the new £500.

Apparently last week they gave out a number of long service awards. Loads at 25 years, and a few at 50 years. Tony Clayton retired the other week 48 years working there. If I manage 7, then something has gone wrong with my retirement calculations. 
 

I have washed the Mercedes today

Good to see you back man 🙂
Basically you and @danthecaprimangot me through the early/fledgling stages of Volvo ownership way back when I was fairly new around here.
Interestingly (Or not) I actually served 3 years of an apprenticeship for Leyland Daf... Seems a long time ago now, but their trucks were well thought of at the time.  IIRC the 95XF was the bees knees/biggest one they did at the time.

Good to see you back man 🙂
Basically you and @danthecaprimangot me through the early/fledgling stages of Volvo ownership way back when I was fairly new around here.
Interestingly (Or not) I actually served 3 years of an apprenticeship for Leyland Daf... Seems a long time ago now, but their trucks were well thought of at the time.  IIRC the 95XF was the bees knees/biggest one they did at the time.

Just popped to Halfords for a battery as the chap was very honest in saying it likely wants one as it’s not been used much this summer. 
 
Really happy with it! Well worth the long day.

No pez shot as it was rammed so I needed to move. 
 
£50 in the tank, 3.5 hours home now

Leicester.
Chap in seat opposite me has just got a CD Walkman out of his rucksack. Approve.