tommytwo

Reading all these grins on here reminded me of something that happened some time ago now.  The company where I was working was going through much change that we were finding very stressful. So plenty of people signed off sick and soon we were down to half strength in the workshop. The company hired two medical professionals to give every employee a medical examination. So two of us get called to the sick bay, get a full physical, and then get passed on to a nurse for further tests. One of the tests was for lung function. My friend John was always  a joker but this time, he went much further than I would have done. He went first on the lung test but this was not good enough for the nurse, who grabbed the tube from him and said, "NO. Not like that. You do it like this" and she demonstrated how to do it. John pipes up and says " You wouldn't be any good for a blow job" I was shocked and also the nurse, who seemed to rock back on her feet. But quick as a flash, she recovered and replied, "I haven't had any complaints" We all were laughing so hard that that part of the examination was never completed.
 
Looking back now on my working life, I have had the privilege of working with some great people.

Reading all these grins on here reminded me of something that happened some time ago now.  The company where I was working was going through much change that we were finding very stressful. So plenty of people signed off sick and soon we were down to half strength in the workshop. The company hired two medical professionals to give every employee a medical examination. So two of us get called to the sick bay, get a full physical, and then get passed on to a nurse for further tests. One of the tests was for lung function. My friend John was always  a joker but this time, he went much further than I would have done. He went first on the lung test but this was not good enough for the nurse, who grabbed the tube from him and said, "NO. Not like that. You do it like this" and she demonstrated how to do it. John pipes up and says " You wouldn't be any good for a blow job" I was shocked and also the nurse, who seemed to rock back on her feet. But quick as a flash, she recovered and replied, "I haven't had any complaints" We all were laughing so hard that that part of the examination was never completed.
 
Looking back now on my working life, I have had the privilege of working with some great people.

Reading all these grins on here reminded me of something that happened some time ago now.  The company where I was working was going through much change that we were finding very stressful. So plenty of people signed off sick and soon we were down to half strength in the workshop. The company hired two medical professionals to give every employee a medical examination. So two of us get called to the sick bay, get a full physical, and then get passed on to a nurse for further tests. One of the tests was for lung function. My friend John was always  a joker but this time, he went much further than I would have done. He went first on the lung test but this was not good enough for the nurse, who grabbed the tube from him and said, "NO. Not like that. You do it like this" and she demonstrated how to do it. John pipes up and says " You wouldn't be any good for a blow job" I was shocked and also the nurse, who seemed to rock back on her feet. But quick as a flash, she recovered and replied, "I haven't had any complaints" We all were laughing so hard that that part of the examination was never completed.
 
Looking back now on my working life, I have had the privilege of working with some great people.

Happy weekend folks.
 
Just wanted to update you all.  I have received a letter this morning from the courts advising that the case has been closed.  Its not an apology but at least confirmation that I was not in the wrong.
 
I was planning on attending but my letter that said "I can attend but Id rather not as I haven't done anything" seems to have worked. 
 
I appreciate the positivity relating to this and the suggestions and I am obviously chuffed with the result.
 
Happy, happy, happy and I appreciate the "don't pay for something you haven't done" guidance. 
 
Thanks again.

Great news! Pleased for you.
 
Thanks for letting us know the outcome.

It's nice that your friend thought of you rather than tipping them, obviously you will be starting a thread with examples of shite repair techniques and pictures from them

A good friend was clearing out a deceased relatives flat and came across these On The Road periodicals. 7 volumes with about 10 issues in each volume. Car maintenance guides in 1970s style.
 
When she found them she thought "Well nobody in the world is gonna be interested in these other than Jim Bell."
 
Obv she's not familiar with Autoshite.
These will keep me entertained for a while though.
 

 
 
 

 
 
 
 

 
 
 

 
 
 
 

 
 
 
 

 
 
 
 

 
 
 
 

 
 
 
 
 

This morning was all full of hope and wonder. Today was the day I shecheduled to pop the lsd into BAL.
 
It had been removed from AVO before going off to become bean tins.
 
Prepping the car
 
Tried changing steering wheel bit couldn't

 
Battery was fully flat so swapped in another charged one

 
Noticed a little puddle - I think the rear light clusters are letting water in

 
Took out the passenger seat to fit all the bits

 
Once over at NJGLeeds garage - removed boot lid
 

 
And swapped in the old foamectomy seat

 
 
Then onto the ramp and up in the air

 
And then the fun and games started. The Torsten diff uses the 1.8 driveshafts so had to swap them over. We hadn't been able to get them undone on AVO so removed the hubs.
 
So started to remove the hubs from BAL except the bottom bolt on the first one had seized solid.
 
 
instead plan was to just swap over the driveshafts.
 
We had spares
 
Except the hubnuts were the tightest thing known to man.
 
It required wheels back on on ground, handbrake and foot brake, massive breaker bar and tube on top - still managed to bend the tube before they popped off

 
Next couple of hours was taken with trying to remove the hubnuts off the driveshafts.
 
Njgleeds tried every trick in the book

 
Finally managed to get the nuts undone - which was ace. Ended up with two driveshafts ready to be fitted.
 
Old diff out

 
 
Next up was to get the old driveshafts out

 
Applying BFH and percussive action resulted in a total of nothing except a rounding if the driveshaft end.
 
That scuppered the plan to swap driveshafts out and ignore the seized bolts.
 
Back to plan A meant trying to find a solution to our woes. Looking at the assorted bits Neil reckoned we could rustle up two hubs with bolts.
 
One thing for it, out comes the wheel of death

 
This was to cut most of a nut off to get another driveshaft out so we could use the hub. The result was positive and the nut yielded
 
Neil got his massive breaker bar and hung off it, managing to loosen the driver's side rear bottom hub bolt. The design means the centre section corrodes and then won't move
 
Even with a massive bar and Neil hanging off it the passenger side bolt wouldn't come undone. Time for a tickle

 
Success and a very happy Yorkshire man.
 
You can see how the bolt has seized even after the ends are cut off

 
Diff bush pushed out with Neil's new favourite tool

 
New diff ready to go in

 
At this point it felt as though we were on the home straight.
 
Just bolt in the propshaft ...

 
Oh
 
 
My
 
 
God
 
 
It is too long. We both literally had a semi heart attack as it wasn't something that we knew we had to change.
 
A panicked rummage found AVOs propshaft in the pile of bits. Our heart rates dropped about 50 bpm.
 
You can see the difference here.
 

 
At this point less photos were taken as time was ticking on.
 
Stuff back together and copper greased the splines so next time is easy
 
You can see the old driveshaft where it has rounded
 
Wheels back on

 
Last few jobs were exhaust back on. Then refit boot lid

 
And all done. Oh well once swapped over the steering wheels.
 

 
From start to finish took about 7 hours including two stops for tea.
 
NJGLeeds is an absolute legend and I don't think I would have ever been able to do this by myself.
 
Driving the car back, it is easy to see what a difference the LSD makes.
 
 
 
Left on to do list is
 
Swap exhaust for 421 headers and decat
Remove and replace immobiliser
Fit a new roof
Upgrade and then Bleed brakes
Underseal the underneath
Change door cards over
Flush cooling system
Full service
Sort out battery drain
New tyres
Delete charcoal cannister
Poly Bush droplinks
 
 
Then onto
Roll cage
Proper alignment
Paint car

When returning the court paperwork, include a letter to The Clerk to The Justices summarizing the facts, give sufficient evidence to show you are not at fault, and say that you will be counter claiming your costs back from the DVLA. The court will notify the DVLA that the action is being defended and that you will claim your costs back. Most people will pay the small fine, that's why its a small fine. The DVLA will not expect you to show up for the hearing. Its not about law and justice. Its about money!
 
Pound to a pinch that the DvLA will drop the matter.

When returning the court paperwork, include a letter to The Clerk to The Justices summarizing the facts, give sufficient evidence to show you are not at fault, and say that you will be counter claiming your costs back from the DVLA. The court will notify the DVLA that the action is being defended and that you will claim your costs back. Most people will pay the small fine, that's why its a small fine. The DVLA will not expect you to show up for the hearing. Its not about law and justice. Its about money!
 
Pound to a pinch that the DvLA will drop the matter.

How long do you have, before the Hearing?
 
Assuming several weeks, bundle your evidence up, copy it and post DVLAs lawyers ( address on letterhead) a copy - asking them to drop it, nicely. Send traceable ( free proof of posting will do)
 
Then send a 2nd identical copy to the Court, (inc a copy of Doovlas covering letter, summarising your innocence in the front sheet. Ask the case be dropped, now, please...
However, if they feel your evidence doesn’t warrant dismissal, kindly transfer to a more local Court, ( make suggestion, to save Clerk effort) allowing you to attend with minimal disruption in a pressurised work environment.
Add, as an aside, that you will be looking for costs, including this submission, in the event you are required to attend.
 
If you have to go - go! The DVLA prosecutor ( nary a Solicitor, they are too cheap) will want to talk to you before the Hearing, to see if you’ve a reasonable chance of winning. They will drop your Case instantly, but you’ll get nowt - just relieved to be leaving ‘ untainted’. If you are strong enough, refuse to talk to them, go before the Court, outline your Defence, and claim your proper Costs - which could be substantive.
You’ve no idea how much pain DVLA endure in sending you that cheque. And if it’s not with you in the allocated 14 days.....

When returning the court paperwork, include a letter to The Clerk to The Justices summarizing the facts, give sufficient evidence to show you are not at fault, and say that you will be counter claiming your costs back from the DVLA. The court will notify the DVLA that the action is being defended and that you will claim your costs back. Most people will pay the small fine, that's why its a small fine. The DVLA will not expect you to show up for the hearing. Its not about law and justice. Its about money!
 
Pound to a pinch that the DvLA will drop the matter.

When returning the court paperwork, include a letter to The Clerk to The Justices summarizing the facts, give sufficient evidence to show you are not at fault, and say that you will be counter claiming your costs back from the DVLA. The court will notify the DVLA that the action is being defended and that you will claim your costs back. Most people will pay the small fine, that's why its a small fine. The DVLA will not expect you to show up for the hearing. Its not about law and justice. Its about money!
 
Pound to a pinch that the DvLA will drop the matter.

When returning the court paperwork, include a letter to The Clerk to The Justices summarizing the facts, give sufficient evidence to show you are not at fault, and say that you will be counter claiming your costs back from the DVLA. The court will notify the DVLA that the action is being defended and that you will claim your costs back. Most people will pay the small fine, that's why its a small fine. The DVLA will not expect you to show up for the hearing. Its not about law and justice. Its about money!
 
Pound to a pinch that the DvLA will drop the matter.

When returning the court paperwork, include a letter to The Clerk to The Justices summarizing the facts, give sufficient evidence to show you are not at fault, and say that you will be counter claiming your costs back from the DVLA. The court will notify the DVLA that the action is being defended and that you will claim your costs back. Most people will pay the small fine, that's why its a small fine. The DVLA will not expect you to show up for the hearing. Its not about law and justice. Its about money!
 
Pound to a pinch that the DvLA will drop the matter.

When returning the court paperwork, include a letter to The Clerk to The Justices summarizing the facts, give sufficient evidence to show you are not at fault, and say that you will be counter claiming your costs back from the DVLA. The court will notify the DVLA that the action is being defended and that you will claim your costs back. Most people will pay the small fine, that's why its a small fine. The DVLA will not expect you to show up for the hearing. Its not about law and justice. Its about money!
 
Pound to a pinch that the DvLA will drop the matter.

The way it works is as follows:
 
The car is fitted with a coil that needs less than 12 volts to give a healthy spark. In normal running, the feed to the coil is via a resistance. During starting. the starter motor hogs everything that the battery can supply and there is not enough current fed to a normal 12 volt coil to generate a healthy spark, hence the feed is routed direct to the coil. When the start key is released, the coil feed is via the resistance in the circuit. This system was once very common on 70ies, early 80ies cars. Usually identified by two wires to one side of a coil and the other side to earth. I have no idea if this system or a variant of it is still used in modernish cars.

The way it works is as follows:
 
The car is fitted with a coil that needs less than 12 volts to give a healthy spark. In normal running, the feed to the coil is via a resistance. During starting. the starter motor hogs everything that the battery can supply and there is not enough current fed to a normal 12 volt coil to generate a healthy spark, hence the feed is routed direct to the coil. When the start key is released, the coil feed is via the resistance in the circuit. This system was once very common on 70ies, early 80ies cars. Usually identified by two wires to one side of a coil and the other side to earth. I have no idea if this system or a variant of it is still used in modernish cars.

I came for the gearbox and stayed for the telescopes.  This post sums up AS so much 
 
1) Finding a cheap part miles away
2) avoiding the logical approach and sleeping in a car 
3) tangent time into old buildings and history of UK 
4) Telescopes 
5) mate wants to see gearbox so take detour 
6) gearbox a bit iffy so dismantled  (No complaints about owner ripping you off etc)
7) sod it we will build another from the bits 
people reading it feel educated in areas that they hadnt ever thought about 
 
12/10 would read repeatedly and take on a first date to a lovely chippy 

Sounds like a reasonable approach.
 
Until last year we had a Potterton boiler that was over 25 years old. Had a replacement fan and circuit board (at different times) but had been extremely reliable. Most engineers wouldn't touch it, simply wanting to replace it before looking at anything else on the system.
 
Struck me as rather like refusing to replace the indicator bulb on a Corsa B as the car was old, even though it had just passed an MOT. Boiler was only replaced as we had a move around and the boiler needed relocating from the kitchen to the bathroom.

The way it works is as follows:
 
The car is fitted with a coil that needs less than 12 volts to give a healthy spark. In normal running, the feed to the coil is via a resistance. During starting. the starter motor hogs everything that the battery can supply and there is not enough current fed to a normal 12 volt coil to generate a healthy spark, hence the feed is routed direct to the coil. When the start key is released, the coil feed is via the resistance in the circuit. This system was once very common on 70ies, early 80ies cars. Usually identified by two wires to one side of a coil and the other side to earth. I have no idea if this system or a variant of it is still used in modernish cars.

Thanks to those who posted tips and solutions to help with my boiler problem. All very much appreciated. Fired it up first thing Saturday morning and it has worked fine just as it should ever since. I now doubt very much that the boiler itself is the source of my problem.I think it is much more likely that the pressure in the gas mains is the culprit. I believe that gas companies run with normal stocks of gas and are caught short by a sudden cold snap, which they find hard to forecast. Modern accountancy theory states that money tied up in stock is unproductive. So they are forced to get more supplies from Holland and Norway via pipelines and this takes time to restore the pressure in the mains. Being in the South West, the gas has a way to travel.
 
This problem only affects me for two days every year. So I have decided to buy a couple of oil filled radiators for the bedrooms. About £40-50 for two. This way, I get something for my money instead of spending it with a gas engineer who will tell me again the my installation is old, inefficient and should be replaced, when it works just fine 363 days a year. The living room has a four burner gas fire and that heats up the downstairs very quickly..
 

The way it works is as follows:
 
The car is fitted with a coil that needs less than 12 volts to give a healthy spark. In normal running, the feed to the coil is via a resistance. During starting. the starter motor hogs everything that the battery can supply and there is not enough current fed to a normal 12 volt coil to generate a healthy spark, hence the feed is routed direct to the coil. When the start key is released, the coil feed is via the resistance in the circuit. This system was once very common on 70ies, early 80ies cars. Usually identified by two wires to one side of a coil and the other side to earth. I have no idea if this system or a variant of it is still used in modernish cars.

"Yeah, so my Buick is broken.
 
Went to go out in it last night, it fired up straight away, ran for two seconds then cut out, and it's not shown any interest in starting since.
 
With the help of a neighbour and a can of Easystart I've been able to ascertain that it's sparking, so the problem is evidently fuel-related.  Helpfully* the OBD is showing no faults, despite the MIL being on .
 
When I turn the ignition on, the in-tank fuel pump whirrs for a couple of seconds, as it should do.  However when I use a screwdriver to press in the Schrader valve on the fuel line under the bonnet, it just sneezes out a few ml of petrol and that's it.  Surely there should be more pressure than that in an EFI system?"
 
Your Buick problem may be due to a ballast Resistor in the ignition circuit. I had this once on a Dodge Aspen in Canada. It always blows when the weather is extremely cold. Its worth checking and the Resistor is usually easy to replace.