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About Fat_Pirate

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    Rank: Citroen Ami

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    Luring disco dollies to a life of vice


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    United Kingdom

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  1. Is any car worth getting up at 5am for, on a Saturday? YES, when it's a free exotic car from that Italia! Mrs Pirate had reluctantly agreed to give me lift to Southampton airport. Annoyance level was around 10% come 5am. I then whined until she stopped at McDonalds drive-through, annoyance level now 25%. At the airport I misdirect her and we almost end up in the long stay car park, I get out and walk shortly before annoyance level hits meltdown. Little plane reaches Manchester an hour later, but the last 20 miles to Bolton takes another 90 mins 'cos trains. I text Jamie with my ETA, but it seems the Alfa is already misbehaving so his wife picks me up from the station. I'm unable to gauge her annoyance level accurately, but she had just been asked to collect a strange man so I would say 20%. Yes I'm strange, of course I am, and if you're reading this you know damn well that you are too. Don't be kidding yourself that you're the "normal one from Autoshite". "Hello, I'm your new car, but you can PISS RIGHT OFF if you think you're going anywhere in me today". It seems the battery won't hold a charge and it won't even respond to the charger Jamie has bought, so it was a quick trip to ECP for a replacement. Even the location of the battery is bloody awkward, on a sort of shelf above the rear wheels - like many things on this car, it seems like an afterthought. Anyway, it then fired up immediately with the new battery and I set off for home, after a brief interlude of demolishing wheelie bins which almost snapped off the passenger mirror. The road next to Jamie's house is very narrow and you have to reverse up it, OK? My inevitable decline into parking-bump giffership hasnt started quite yet, I hope. Out on the road, the car drives very well. The clutch (replaced a couple of years ago) is very smooth, which is good as I can't risk stalling it due to the hotstart issue. Steering is lovely and it handles nicely. It feels quite large - like a full size saloon that's been truncated. Seating position is quite odd, wheel is a long stretch away and it almost seems like you're sitting in the back of it. It's certainly not slow despite being the little-engined version, I like it. 240 miles later and I'm home with no issues. I stall it getting it onto the drive... but it starts right up again! Wife is reasonably impressed by it, annoyance level now 10% again (about average). As you'd expect, there are jobs to do and this isn't the ideal time of year for it. Today's tasks are the exhaust leak and to give it a check-over for the MOT next month, but there doesn't appear to be any obvious problems. I'm really pleased with it so thanks to Jamie and Mrs, and Snagglepuss for buying me the roffle ticket
  2. I have indeed. The roof is mostly fixed now - there's a tension cable on each side, and loosening that bolt allows you to push the metal cylinder forward to increase it a bit. I've used all the slack now but 90% of the time it works properly, and doesn't just collapse onto the windscreen header. Also replaced the brake light switch, but still randomly getting the TC/ABS/BAS warning light. I've discounted any issue with the battery, so maybe a wheel sensor? There really is no pattern to when it comes on. This car doesn't have an OBD port so no code reading available. I just treat it as the "drift around the next roundabout" light now. Had the tracking done so the wheel is straight. Still leaking oil, still haven't investigated it properly - sump holds 8 litres so I've not had to top it up yet. It managed nearly 40mpg on a run to Alton Towers last month, very pleased with that. Still got no intention of moving it on anytime soon, it really suits me - and the lucky ladies of Hampshire get to see my handsome face too The roffle GTV will be joining it shortly though, will that shake things up?
  3. Renault 11 GTL by day with an instructor, yellow Dolomite at night, on my own... with no insurance/license/owners consent! It was my mother's boyfriends car, he drove a HGV and was away all week. Got away with it, thankfully.
  4. £595, 1.6 and 69K. Probably years of inexpensive trouble-free motoring on offer here, it would make a good companion for the tripe that haunts the Low Cost Big Liability thread.
  5. It's a Brabus so NO LAUGHING, it is very serious performance car for the sporting gentleman or lady. £1750 BIN This is USED CAR according to the 1-line description, you're lucky I managed to find this for you. The fancy-looking stereo appears to have a preset for Bossa Nova, you want that,
  6. /\ NC750X innit? Wot they like? They look a bit sensible.
  7. My daily lunchtime shite scan brings you this; LHD and he's not giving it away, nice tho: "The car has been rolling road tuned and made 61.5bhp" Steady now.
  8. Hmmm, £1295 but possibly fucked:
  9. Servant-spec transmission but looks nice at £1100.
  10. Ultimate Cavcraft spec: I rented one of these once, I'd describe it as an extremely poor photocopy of a Transit. £1100.
  11. Ultimate spec Rover 75: £2150 being asked, if I didn't already have a wafty vehicle I'd be going to see this.
  12. Received a large parcel, but couldn't remember ordering anything... Turns out to be a free cache of useful CLK spares from Gadgetpricey! He won't even accept anything for postage, which is very kind.
  14. X308 is different front suspension to 300, isn't it? Supposedly improved. Probably cheaper to manufacture.
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