dave21478

The telephone ate my photographs of the final installment of the Ranger collection so you will just have to use your imagination for that bit...
Truth be told, I got it transported by a specialist firm who do regular runs down to Spain from UK with a transporter. I got it dropped off at a nearby city where I picked it up on my trailer. Expensive? yeah, but it was probably the best choice overall.
I had a few nice pics of the Ranger on the trailer being towed by the Mazda but changing telephone since then and google accounts and stuff means they have somehow been erased. Fuck technology, but thats not the first time I have said that is it?
 
Anyway, here it is tucked up in the garage and the Mazda has been relegated to outside parking.

 
orf with its head, etc etc.... easy enough job with plenty of room to work on the engine. A couple of the exhaust manifold studs are tricky to access, but nothing too challenging. Two of the glow plugs were non-functional when tested, so that explains the slow starting and puffs of smoke after starting.
 
Its a weirdo multi layer gasket on it, and there was this section where its fairly certain to have been leaking between cylinder three and the oval water gallery.

 
Its not unknown for these to crack the head, and with nothing visible to my eyes and with no knowledge of WHERE they like to crack it really needed pressure tested in case there is an internal leak between an inlet or exhaust port and a water passage. I know a wee engine place that does this sort of work so I trudged down to town to get them to test it and check for flatness and skim if needed. Inside was an empty, quiet machine shop with two bored looking guys fiddling with telephones....hmm, might get this done while I wait eh? 
Hello...blah blah pressure test and skim please
Trade only, m8.
uh, I have had stuff done here before...
new management innit. Trade only. got proof of trade?
er, no, but I have cash and dont need a receipt.
nah, trade only.
busy, are you?
no.
welp, good luck with that. Seeya. Cunts. (didnt say the last bit out loud obviously, didnt fancy a kicking)
 
The googles told me about another place so I went round....always better to do this sort of thing face to face in france, its way too easy to get the fob-off on the telephone.
Hello, blah blah pressure test etc etc....
yeah, s'pose. Leave it here and it will be done by next Friday.
How much will it cost?
'bout 300 euros. Plus tax.
 
loading....
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ERROR.
 
THREE HUNDRED FUCKING EUROS? i can literally buy a brand new head for less than that.
 
pff, if you want something done in this third-world country, do it your fucking self.
 
So, pressure test eh? How hard can it be?
 
Well, get an offcut of oak worktop, use the old gasket as a template to drill the head stud pattern through it, make a gasket from a bit of flat rubber which is actually an offcut of pond liner, cut up a bunch of M8 allthread and get a load of nuts and washers to use as clamping bolts, assemble this lot...


 
Plug the big water inlet pipe and ram a tyre valve into one of the smaller pipes.

squirt soapy water all over the place and use your compressor to pump it up to about 80 psi. No sign of leaks.
I tried higher pressure but it blew out the rubber gasket, but I would say there is no cracks here. Yeah, I know compression pressure is way higher than that, but the way I see it, with no obvious leak at lower pressure and being fairly certain about where the old gasket was leaking I reckon it will be fine.
 
So, surface check and skim eh? how hard can that be?
 
Much fucking about with a steel ruler, feeler gauges, torch etc gave inconclusive results. I have since found out my steel rule is bent, so thats no fucking use is it?
I needed something flat. A flash of inspiration led to a quick blast to work where I rummaged this massive sheet of glass out of a rubbish pile. Its about 30mm thick and was meant to be part of a transparent walkway that never got built. As far as I am capable of measuring, its as flat as my personality. Pretty flat.
I used spray glue to stick sheets of medium wet n dry paper to it.

(if I were doing this again, i would butt the sheets tightly together. I had thought the gaps would allow gunk to clear from the sheets but the edges tended to lift and rip.)
 
 
I lubed them with soapy water then placed the head down and slid it back and forth and round in a figure-eight pattern, not pressing down, just letting its own weight do the work.
fuckin nice result there....

 
I sprayed a light mist of spray paint over the head and let it dry, then repeated the sanding process briefly and all the paint was removed evenly, so no major differences in surface height are apparent....kinda like a guide coat when flatting bodywork.
 
Flat enough, I would say.
 
I have ordered a gasket set, timing belt kit etc etc, so hopefully will get this back together next weekend.
 
 
 

Its 2am and I am sitting here waiting for the sweet release of death - Seriously....God.....You and I both know I dont believe in you, but on the offchance I am wrong, just hurry the fuck up and kill me.
 
I am one of those annyoing twats who never gets ill....the odd sniffle, sometimes a dose of the runs if food doesnt agree, but when I do get ill, holy fuck do I cop it bad.
 
Sore throat that is agony when swallowing....its like deep-throating a handful of hacksaw blades. This has spread to sore neck and stuffy head, and while this is just about bearable during the day its hellish at night....I havent had more than about 10 minutes of continuous sleep since Tuesday...just a few snatched minutes of dozing here and there until I am awoken by coughing and pain. Weird side effects include excess saliva production so I smear dribble all over my face when lying down and have to constantly spit into a bucket on the floor like some fucking Alabama hick, and most bizarrely I seem to have developed an air-leak in my plumbing somewhere as I am ripping out the most disturbing, life-changing farts imaginable.  
 
I have been to Le Boots and bought all the medicines and have been chewing that shit like its tic-tacs but its doing fuck all.
 
Add in the heat...the fucking unbearable, savage, unremitting heat that is supposed to get even fucking hotter next week and here I am sitting butt-nekkid in front of the computer with a fan pointed at my nads, moaning to a bunch of imaginary people on an online forum about cars that is probably all just a delusion in my head.

A doctors? In France? On a sunny Friday afternoon? not fucking likely, they are all motoring to the coast for a weekend on their yachts.
 
I trundled down to a proper pharmacy....the pharmacist profession is a respected medical type here, especially in places like here in bumfuck nowhere, miles from civilisation, who can deal with minor-ish medical stuff and advise well if serious stuff is needed, at least.
 
"oooh, thats a big one". I hadent even taken my trousers off at this point, but realised he was talking about the photo of my bloody snotbaby. Almost certainly just a gooey clot from a slow noose-bleed that had been back-filling a cavity in the hollow, rattling void I call a head. Nothing to really worry about, better out than in etc etc...apparently.
If more nose bleeds occur or more eldritch blood monsters crawl out of my skull I will need a hospital to seal the leak so just keep calm and carry on....
 
 
 
 
I flicked it out the car window....I like to imagine it growing.... hunting...learning....

Hey guys, wanna see something fucking horrific? 
 
I will mask it because there are some sensitive types on here...
 
 
 
 
Driving along and this six inch blood-slug came out my nostril. it was the consistency of very overcooked pasta with a slimy coating of blood on the outside. Fucking weirdest sensation...it felt like it was attached directly to the back of my eyeball.
 
 
So...uh....is this good or bad?
 
 

Its 2am and I am sitting here waiting for the sweet release of death - Seriously....God.....You and I both know I dont believe in you, but on the offchance I am wrong, just hurry the fuck up and kill me.
 
I am one of those annyoing twats who never gets ill....the odd sniffle, sometimes a dose of the runs if food doesnt agree, but when I do get ill, holy fuck do I cop it bad.
 
Sore throat that is agony when swallowing....its like deep-throating a handful of hacksaw blades. This has spread to sore neck and stuffy head, and while this is just about bearable during the day its hellish at night....I havent had more than about 10 minutes of continuous sleep since Tuesday...just a few snatched minutes of dozing here and there until I am awoken by coughing and pain. Weird side effects include excess saliva production so I smear dribble all over my face when lying down and have to constantly spit into a bucket on the floor like some fucking Alabama hick, and most bizarrely I seem to have developed an air-leak in my plumbing somewhere as I am ripping out the most disturbing, life-changing farts imaginable.  
 
I have been to Le Boots and bought all the medicines and have been chewing that shit like its tic-tacs but its doing fuck all.
 
Add in the heat...the fucking unbearable, savage, unremitting heat that is supposed to get even fucking hotter next week and here I am sitting butt-nekkid in front of the computer with a fan pointed at my nads, moaning to a bunch of imaginary people on an online forum about cars that is probably all just a delusion in my head.

FFS

Obviously I dont know your paint guy, but I have found that "its just an old car innit?" is apparently a valid excuse to half-ass the job.

A doctors? In France? On a sunny Friday afternoon? not fucking likely, they are all motoring to the coast for a weekend on their yachts.
 
I trundled down to a proper pharmacy....the pharmacist profession is a respected medical type here, especially in places like here in bumfuck nowhere, miles from civilisation, who can deal with minor-ish medical stuff and advise well if serious stuff is needed, at least.
 
"oooh, thats a big one". I hadent even taken my trousers off at this point, but realised he was talking about the photo of my bloody snotbaby. Almost certainly just a gooey clot from a slow noose-bleed that had been back-filling a cavity in the hollow, rattling void I call a head. Nothing to really worry about, better out than in etc etc...apparently.
If more nose bleeds occur or more eldritch blood monsters crawl out of my skull I will need a hospital to seal the leak so just keep calm and carry on....
 
 
 
 
I flicked it out the car window....I like to imagine it growing.... hunting...learning....

A doctors? In France? On a sunny Friday afternoon? not fucking likely, they are all motoring to the coast for a weekend on their yachts.
 
I trundled down to a proper pharmacy....the pharmacist profession is a respected medical type here, especially in places like here in bumfuck nowhere, miles from civilisation, who can deal with minor-ish medical stuff and advise well if serious stuff is needed, at least.
 
"oooh, thats a big one". I hadent even taken my trousers off at this point, but realised he was talking about the photo of my bloody snotbaby. Almost certainly just a gooey clot from a slow noose-bleed that had been back-filling a cavity in the hollow, rattling void I call a head. Nothing to really worry about, better out than in etc etc...apparently.
If more nose bleeds occur or more eldritch blood monsters crawl out of my skull I will need a hospital to seal the leak so just keep calm and carry on....
 
 
 
 
I flicked it out the car window....I like to imagine it growing.... hunting...learning....

A doctors? In France? On a sunny Friday afternoon? not fucking likely, they are all motoring to the coast for a weekend on their yachts.
 
I trundled down to a proper pharmacy....the pharmacist profession is a respected medical type here, especially in places like here in bumfuck nowhere, miles from civilisation, who can deal with minor-ish medical stuff and advise well if serious stuff is needed, at least.
 
"oooh, thats a big one". I hadent even taken my trousers off at this point, but realised he was talking about the photo of my bloody snotbaby. Almost certainly just a gooey clot from a slow noose-bleed that had been back-filling a cavity in the hollow, rattling void I call a head. Nothing to really worry about, better out than in etc etc...apparently.
If more nose bleeds occur or more eldritch blood monsters crawl out of my skull I will need a hospital to seal the leak so just keep calm and carry on....
 
 
 
 
I flicked it out the car window....I like to imagine it growing.... hunting...learning....

This afternoon I was too hot so I slung my canoe in the back of the Morris and went for a paddle on the 40 foot drain which is just near me. I fell on attempting to get out of the water and drove home soaking wet. The sky suddenly went so dark that the outside light came on (see windscreen reflection) and it pissed down. We're off to Essex tomorrow so given the poor windows seals I expect to have a wet arse for the entire weekend.

A doctors? In France? On a sunny Friday afternoon? not fucking likely, they are all motoring to the coast for a weekend on their yachts.
 
I trundled down to a proper pharmacy....the pharmacist profession is a respected medical type here, especially in places like here in bumfuck nowhere, miles from civilisation, who can deal with minor-ish medical stuff and advise well if serious stuff is needed, at least.
 
"oooh, thats a big one". I hadent even taken my trousers off at this point, but realised he was talking about the photo of my bloody snotbaby. Almost certainly just a gooey clot from a slow noose-bleed that had been back-filling a cavity in the hollow, rattling void I call a head. Nothing to really worry about, better out than in etc etc...apparently.
If more nose bleeds occur or more eldritch blood monsters crawl out of my skull I will need a hospital to seal the leak so just keep calm and carry on....
 
 
 
 
I flicked it out the car window....I like to imagine it growing.... hunting...learning....

Its 2am and I am sitting here waiting for the sweet release of death - Seriously....God.....You and I both know I dont believe in you, but on the offchance I am wrong, just hurry the fuck up and kill me.
 
I am one of those annyoing twats who never gets ill....the odd sniffle, sometimes a dose of the runs if food doesnt agree, but when I do get ill, holy fuck do I cop it bad.
 
Sore throat that is agony when swallowing....its like deep-throating a handful of hacksaw blades. This has spread to sore neck and stuffy head, and while this is just about bearable during the day its hellish at night....I havent had more than about 10 minutes of continuous sleep since Tuesday...just a few snatched minutes of dozing here and there until I am awoken by coughing and pain. Weird side effects include excess saliva production so I smear dribble all over my face when lying down and have to constantly spit into a bucket on the floor like some fucking Alabama hick, and most bizarrely I seem to have developed an air-leak in my plumbing somewhere as I am ripping out the most disturbing, life-changing farts imaginable.  
 
I have been to Le Boots and bought all the medicines and have been chewing that shit like its tic-tacs but its doing fuck all.
 
Add in the heat...the fucking unbearable, savage, unremitting heat that is supposed to get even fucking hotter next week and here I am sitting butt-nekkid in front of the computer with a fan pointed at my nads, moaning to a bunch of imaginary people on an online forum about cars that is probably all just a delusion in my head.

A doctors? In France? On a sunny Friday afternoon? not fucking likely, they are all motoring to the coast for a weekend on their yachts.
 
I trundled down to a proper pharmacy....the pharmacist profession is a respected medical type here, especially in places like here in bumfuck nowhere, miles from civilisation, who can deal with minor-ish medical stuff and advise well if serious stuff is needed, at least.
 
"oooh, thats a big one". I hadent even taken my trousers off at this point, but realised he was talking about the photo of my bloody snotbaby. Almost certainly just a gooey clot from a slow noose-bleed that had been back-filling a cavity in the hollow, rattling void I call a head. Nothing to really worry about, better out than in etc etc...apparently.
If more nose bleeds occur or more eldritch blood monsters crawl out of my skull I will need a hospital to seal the leak so just keep calm and carry on....
 
 
 
 
I flicked it out the car window....I like to imagine it growing.... hunting...learning....

A doctors? In France? On a sunny Friday afternoon? not fucking likely, they are all motoring to the coast for a weekend on their yachts.
 
I trundled down to a proper pharmacy....the pharmacist profession is a respected medical type here, especially in places like here in bumfuck nowhere, miles from civilisation, who can deal with minor-ish medical stuff and advise well if serious stuff is needed, at least.
 
"oooh, thats a big one". I hadent even taken my trousers off at this point, but realised he was talking about the photo of my bloody snotbaby. Almost certainly just a gooey clot from a slow noose-bleed that had been back-filling a cavity in the hollow, rattling void I call a head. Nothing to really worry about, better out than in etc etc...apparently.
If more nose bleeds occur or more eldritch blood monsters crawl out of my skull I will need a hospital to seal the leak so just keep calm and carry on....
 
 
 
 
I flicked it out the car window....I like to imagine it growing.... hunting...learning....

A doctors? In France? On a sunny Friday afternoon? not fucking likely, they are all motoring to the coast for a weekend on their yachts.
 
I trundled down to a proper pharmacy....the pharmacist profession is a respected medical type here, especially in places like here in bumfuck nowhere, miles from civilisation, who can deal with minor-ish medical stuff and advise well if serious stuff is needed, at least.
 
"oooh, thats a big one". I hadent even taken my trousers off at this point, but realised he was talking about the photo of my bloody snotbaby. Almost certainly just a gooey clot from a slow noose-bleed that had been back-filling a cavity in the hollow, rattling void I call a head. Nothing to really worry about, better out than in etc etc...apparently.
If more nose bleeds occur or more eldritch blood monsters crawl out of my skull I will need a hospital to seal the leak so just keep calm and carry on....
 
 
 
 
I flicked it out the car window....I like to imagine it growing.... hunting...learning....

Its 2am and I am sitting here waiting for the sweet release of death - Seriously....God.....You and I both know I dont believe in you, but on the offchance I am wrong, just hurry the fuck up and kill me.
 
I am one of those annyoing twats who never gets ill....the odd sniffle, sometimes a dose of the runs if food doesnt agree, but when I do get ill, holy fuck do I cop it bad.
 
Sore throat that is agony when swallowing....its like deep-throating a handful of hacksaw blades. This has spread to sore neck and stuffy head, and while this is just about bearable during the day its hellish at night....I havent had more than about 10 minutes of continuous sleep since Tuesday...just a few snatched minutes of dozing here and there until I am awoken by coughing and pain. Weird side effects include excess saliva production so I smear dribble all over my face when lying down and have to constantly spit into a bucket on the floor like some fucking Alabama hick, and most bizarrely I seem to have developed an air-leak in my plumbing somewhere as I am ripping out the most disturbing, life-changing farts imaginable.  
 
I have been to Le Boots and bought all the medicines and have been chewing that shit like its tic-tacs but its doing fuck all.
 
Add in the heat...the fucking unbearable, savage, unremitting heat that is supposed to get even fucking hotter next week and here I am sitting butt-nekkid in front of the computer with a fan pointed at my nads, moaning to a bunch of imaginary people on an online forum about cars that is probably all just a delusion in my head.

What... no terrible Dad-level pun?  I was all geared up to hate myself a little bit more for being amused at another of your terrible Dad jokes there and instead, it was just an amusing anecdote.

Been having a rough few months with my relationship and other assorted issues but have managed to pull myself together enough to help my old man get this old thing ready. Since turning 25 last month I found that being a named driver on his classic insurance policy loads the premium by exactly five pounds. Winner! It's rough around the edges, but that's the way we like em. Nearly done now, going in for a new gearbox on Monday and then have some BFO Cooper tyres to finish it off. Probably gonna piss down for the rest of the summer now but at least I'll be able to hear that wonderful V8 burble.

A doctors? In France? On a sunny Friday afternoon? not fucking likely, they are all motoring to the coast for a weekend on their yachts.
 
I trundled down to a proper pharmacy....the pharmacist profession is a respected medical type here, especially in places like here in bumfuck nowhere, miles from civilisation, who can deal with minor-ish medical stuff and advise well if serious stuff is needed, at least.
 
"oooh, thats a big one". I hadent even taken my trousers off at this point, but realised he was talking about the photo of my bloody snotbaby. Almost certainly just a gooey clot from a slow noose-bleed that had been back-filling a cavity in the hollow, rattling void I call a head. Nothing to really worry about, better out than in etc etc...apparently.
If more nose bleeds occur or more eldritch blood monsters crawl out of my skull I will need a hospital to seal the leak so just keep calm and carry on....
 
 
 
 
I flicked it out the car window....I like to imagine it growing.... hunting...learning....

A doctors? In France? On a sunny Friday afternoon? not fucking likely, they are all motoring to the coast for a weekend on their yachts.
 
I trundled down to a proper pharmacy....the pharmacist profession is a respected medical type here, especially in places like here in bumfuck nowhere, miles from civilisation, who can deal with minor-ish medical stuff and advise well if serious stuff is needed, at least.
 
"oooh, thats a big one". I hadent even taken my trousers off at this point, but realised he was talking about the photo of my bloody snotbaby. Almost certainly just a gooey clot from a slow noose-bleed that had been back-filling a cavity in the hollow, rattling void I call a head. Nothing to really worry about, better out than in etc etc...apparently.
If more nose bleeds occur or more eldritch blood monsters crawl out of my skull I will need a hospital to seal the leak so just keep calm and carry on....
 
 
 
 
I flicked it out the car window....I like to imagine it growing.... hunting...learning....

Hmm, bit late to this but as a lifelong sufferer of nose bleeds thats a pretty normal blood clot IMO. 
 
Shocker if you aren't used to it but pretty normal looking to me.

Its 2am and I am sitting here waiting for the sweet release of death - Seriously....God.....You and I both know I dont believe in you, but on the offchance I am wrong, just hurry the fuck up and kill me.
 
I am one of those annyoing twats who never gets ill....the odd sniffle, sometimes a dose of the runs if food doesnt agree, but when I do get ill, holy fuck do I cop it bad.
 
Sore throat that is agony when swallowing....its like deep-throating a handful of hacksaw blades. This has spread to sore neck and stuffy head, and while this is just about bearable during the day its hellish at night....I havent had more than about 10 minutes of continuous sleep since Tuesday...just a few snatched minutes of dozing here and there until I am awoken by coughing and pain. Weird side effects include excess saliva production so I smear dribble all over my face when lying down and have to constantly spit into a bucket on the floor like some fucking Alabama hick, and most bizarrely I seem to have developed an air-leak in my plumbing somewhere as I am ripping out the most disturbing, life-changing farts imaginable.  
 
I have been to Le Boots and bought all the medicines and have been chewing that shit like its tic-tacs but its doing fuck all.
 
Add in the heat...the fucking unbearable, savage, unremitting heat that is supposed to get even fucking hotter next week and here I am sitting butt-nekkid in front of the computer with a fan pointed at my nads, moaning to a bunch of imaginary people on an online forum about cars that is probably all just a delusion in my head.

Its 2am and I am sitting here waiting for the sweet release of death - Seriously....God.....You and I both know I dont believe in you, but on the offchance I am wrong, just hurry the fuck up and kill me.
 
I am one of those annyoing twats who never gets ill....the odd sniffle, sometimes a dose of the runs if food doesnt agree, but when I do get ill, holy fuck do I cop it bad.
 
Sore throat that is agony when swallowing....its like deep-throating a handful of hacksaw blades. This has spread to sore neck and stuffy head, and while this is just about bearable during the day its hellish at night....I havent had more than about 10 minutes of continuous sleep since Tuesday...just a few snatched minutes of dozing here and there until I am awoken by coughing and pain. Weird side effects include excess saliva production so I smear dribble all over my face when lying down and have to constantly spit into a bucket on the floor like some fucking Alabama hick, and most bizarrely I seem to have developed an air-leak in my plumbing somewhere as I am ripping out the most disturbing, life-changing farts imaginable.  
 
I have been to Le Boots and bought all the medicines and have been chewing that shit like its tic-tacs but its doing fuck all.
 
Add in the heat...the fucking unbearable, savage, unremitting heat that is supposed to get even fucking hotter next week and here I am sitting butt-nekkid in front of the computer with a fan pointed at my nads, moaning to a bunch of imaginary people on an online forum about cars that is probably all just a delusion in my head.

A doctors? In France? On a sunny Friday afternoon? not fucking likely, they are all motoring to the coast for a weekend on their yachts.
 
I trundled down to a proper pharmacy....the pharmacist profession is a respected medical type here, especially in places like here in bumfuck nowhere, miles from civilisation, who can deal with minor-ish medical stuff and advise well if serious stuff is needed, at least.
 
"oooh, thats a big one". I hadent even taken my trousers off at this point, but realised he was talking about the photo of my bloody snotbaby. Almost certainly just a gooey clot from a slow noose-bleed that had been back-filling a cavity in the hollow, rattling void I call a head. Nothing to really worry about, better out than in etc etc...apparently.
If more nose bleeds occur or more eldritch blood monsters crawl out of my skull I will need a hospital to seal the leak so just keep calm and carry on....
 
 
 
 
I flicked it out the car window....I like to imagine it growing.... hunting...learning....