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NorthernMonkey last won the day on April 25

NorthernMonkey had the most liked content!


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  • Location
    Pendle hill, witch country
  • Interests
    Brushing dried mud from underneath Range Rovers


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Rank: Renault 16

Rank: Renault 16 (7/12)



  1. Where do I apply? I like budgies and I’d sure as hell be better off financially…
  2. I know…the Mrs works in asset management for a global finance company and there’s a lot of worried people in the industry re the residuals and GFVs of JLR stuff!
  3. Crazy, isn’t it? BB postcode but we’re 1/4 mile away from the forest of Bowland and five minutes into Clitheroe
  4. I’ve been panicking slightly as mine is due for renewal in two weeks. Bearing in mind it’s a full business policy including the Mrs and I fully comp on any vehicle owned by the company or in our control as well as covering all our own personal vehicles fully comp (including Range Rover etc) for SDP & for business use for Claire as she occasionally travels to sites as part of her job. We are also in a BB postcode and it covers all the tools and contents of the unit as well as public indemnity etc. Got the renewal yesterday…gone up £200 and if previous years are anything to go by, they’ll probably knock £150 off that if I whinge a bit! Almost tempted to just pay it without chipping them. I did say almost…
  5. If you can remember your old username, pm me and I’ll see if I can find what happened to your old account?
  6. Couldn’t work out why the cig packet had a picture of a Spaniel’s head on it until I zoomed in! 🤨
  7. Was on the M60 last year heading to Costco when I spotted a bright light on the hard shoulder in the distance. There wasn’t much traffic so I slowed down and stopped level with it so the Mrs could open her door and lean out to investigate…it was a cordless LED work lamp. Obviously there wasn’t a charger but the one for my iZettle machine works perfectly. It’s still in daily use and lasts a week or so on one overnight charge.
  8. Lee mentioned the EML which had cropped up earlier but had since cleared itself. This actually reappeared at Newport Pagnell services on a coffee stop but had no perceptible effect on the driving and was basically ignored by Mrs NM who by this point had thrown the XC90 keys at me and positioned herself in DiDi, as it’s since been christened by myself due to its colour. Work it out. One very strange issue appeared when investigating the light yesterday afternoon…it refuses point blank to communicate with my various scanners, ranging from a basic obd reader to a top end Autel clone tablet. In the end, I dug out my old SnapOn Solus pro with the loose identity keys and it found it straight away! Doing a bit of digging reveals that this era of Bini has two different lines of communication between the port and the various ecus. Most readers these data use a dedicated data bus line which on this car appears to be corrupted, but there’s also a standard can bus high and low which the Snap on will connect through quite happily, so that’ll merit further investigation. In the meantime, the eml appears to be down to an intermittent misfire on cylinder one… Swapping plugs and leads around made zero difference so a new coil pack has been delivered by my factors this afternoon for £22 and will be changed in due course as Claire is working from home tomorrow so I stand a fighting chance of getting my hands on it in the morning…by the time I got up today, it had disappeared from the driveway whereas her Volvo was still where we left it last night post Aldi…
  9. Welcome to the latest arrival… Got up on Sunday morning at whatever time it was thanks to the clocks going back and whilst stood on the patio supervising the Springers, took a quick look at the forum. Hmm. A Bini convertible. A very cheap one at that. By the time the dogs have sussed out the overnight wildlife movements around the trailer, a message has been sent. Despite owning a succession of Beetle convertibles, Mrs NM has always considered trying out a Bini ragtop as they are equally ‘funky’ enough in her opinion. I’ve tried many times with many different soft top Audis, BMWs and MBs but nothing has been deemed suitable and we’ve always ended up with another Beetle, but this piqued her interest enough to be pestering me every five minutes on Sunday morning as to whether or not a reply had been received. Several hours later, once @groovylee had woken up, we were on the M6 heading south. It wasn’t until we’d exchanged details on WhatsApp that we both realised we’d had previous dealing’s earlier in the year! Anyway, we arrived in deepest Buckinghamshire (I think) around teatime and were back home watching the F1 by 22.30 with a can of Elvis Juice (not a euphemism, google it) So what have we got? Basically a very late mark one Bini with the best of both worlds, a tritec engine and a later gearbox that actually works…the combination that many would argue BMW should have stuck with rather than the notoriously reliable* Prince engine from those great bunch of lads in Hams hall, Birmingham (no, not THAT great bunch of lads) Up on the ramp for a quick look and all is good… The front subframe will benefit from a wire brush and a coating of Lanolin but that’s purely a preventative maintenance type of job…it’s absolutely solid. The test advisories mentioned a bit of wear on the front tyres and a minor oil leak but that’s extreme arse covering…the rubber still has a good 3mm right on the inner edge whereas the rest is around 5mm and the oil leak is just a bit road dirt around the bottom of the sump area…neither would merit a mention from my tester tbh. Did I mention it’s also got a bloody sunroof mode?! 😂
  10. It’s been replaced by ‘BONUS10’ for 10% off. Not quite as good but still a bargain.
  11. My latest order has just arrived, 42 hrs after purchase. The FedEx driver looked a bit pissed off this morning in the pouring rain and wind 😂
  12. Just ordered another 60ltrs of C3 and 20ltrs of Ford ECO for £170 including VAT. Just too cheap at that price! 😂
  13. Get a piece of 6x3 ply and place in the living room on top of 4 barrels. New coffee table for the good lady and lots of cheap oil. Everyone’s a winner. You’re welcome. Check back in for tomorrow’s top AS tip.
  14. Mine arrived this morning…less than half the price of my usual supplier. Might order some more if the offer is still running.
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