Kiltox

I call it AS but only because I cant really say Shite in frint of my 4 year old son!

First direct have bombarded me with about 7 letters confirming who I am over the last 2 weeks, then the other day sent me 6 forms to fill out and get countersigned and post back, wtf it's 2017 let me do it online!
 
Luckily I made our solicitor at work a tea and he did it all but fuck me, remind me never to go with a bank who have been busted for money laundering again! I feel your pain.
 
Wait until they find out I've spunked £200 of the overdraft on an old Renault and not paid anything in yet (needs to be set up and switched from our old joint account before I pay my wages in)...

Never change, autoshite.

It is in one of the comments (the third), which you have to expand to get impressions of the full 'celestial experience' of buying an incontinent Omega for the price of one leg of an office chair in BMW Park Lane

WHOA!

 
Oh, and the engine turns as well. Dumped a load of penetrating oil in via the spark plug holes, cranked it over and now it turns all the way! Dynastart now operates after a few whacks with a hammer. RIDICULOUSLY EXCITED. But decided 10pm not the best time to try a fire up. Need to rig up a fuel supply and find some decent plugs (same as 2CV, handy!)

Everything that boils my piss about LinkedIn right there.
 
Namedropping, buzzwords and made up job roles, arselicking and egotripping.
 
I keep getting told at work I need an account. The last time it was by our contact at Microsoft, who own LinkedIn.
I created one, and they still weren't impressed. Apparently "Bobby Fakename" isn't allowed to be on there and got banned shortly afterwards.

That may* be me 

Y tho?

gregs656 said:There are also lots of imitations of that chair.Jesus fking Christ

Read that back to yourself and think about what you sound like.
 
 
Had to laugh at that reply on PH.

Fuck... contact made... lets go back to OMG REALLY STUPID PURCHASE

Also afflicted. Fucking hate it.
 
Found a countermeasure.
 
 

I stalked various uber expensive 'Steelcase' chairs over the years. Finally bought one that stank of cigarette smoke but came right money as a result. I still have it.
It's fucking rubbish. My wife chose and bought one at Makro for £18. It's the most comfortable thing on the planet. Bollocks.

This is a megabarg - I've bought something really fucking stupid instead of this and I regret it already 

So this cunt leases a secondhand BMW and had a "celestial experience" WTF?
 
Do you think he understands what celestial means?
But he was so brave and daring paying a deposit without seeing the year old BMW Approved car from probably the best known BMW dealership in the UK .
Verdict: Grade A Pistonheader

BT.
 
 
I worked for them years ago & once got a job to install broadband for someone who'd had it working for six months...

The Mrs ordered fibre to the house at 11am-ish on a Friday
The Next day at 9am there were 2 engineers knocking on the gate wanting to come in and Finish hooking up
They had already run cable 300m to the nearest pole from the main feed down the road
By midday all was done and dusted so they left us with a number to ring once the router turned up
Once sorted the service has been excellent
Easily 3-4 times quicker than BT could ever do,with very few drop outs apart from the odd power cut.....

Also afflicted. Fucking hate it.
 
Found a countermeasure.
 
 

Got me looking for the advert. It's the first ad in this commercial break.
 
https://youtu.be/oEbPum00Fs8?t=9s

Put a mobility scooter on Gumtree. 18, yes eighteen, messages from the same person in about 15 minutes. Initial request for me to deliver 25 miles away, knocked them back.
 
'I'm housebound, cannot go out'. Sorry to hear that.
 
'Can you bring it to me?'.  No sorry.
 
'Is there any other way something cheap? I could meet you at my local railway station if you wanted.
 
'Can't soz, I'm housebound' Oh, ok thanks anyhow.
 
'I can hire a van and collect it tomorrow if you want?'   Ok, no problem message me in the morning.
 
It's still here, of course.

Fuck... contact made... lets go back to OMG REALLY STUPID PURCHASE

I think there is an AS group on the 'interests' section. I suspect publicly announcing your membership of it will result in all future job offers being withdrawn.

Today I mentioned AS on linkedin, for a laugh.
https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/my-most-recent-car-buying-experience-digital-all-nathan-elliott/?trackingId=VGFsY7sbRLZI0BmSOgmatQ%3D%3D
 
 

Also afflicted. Fucking hate it.
 
Found a countermeasure.
 
 

Surely a doctor shouldn’t be telling anyone to take internet advice
 
If that’s actually okay then I recommend cocaine and prostitutes for your condition - it’s on the internet so it must be true

Probably for the best. Last person (chompy) who bought a similar aged Laguna on here got offended with the banter and hit the nuclear option...!