Pillock

Up next, this wonderful Samara. Laid up in 1999 at only 7 years old, it wonders whether it's poundland wheeltrims will ever see the road to the seaside again.
 

At the other end of the social scale - have an Over 800. Like a prick I've not got a photo of the reg plate so I'll pretend that it's been unlicensed since 1942 and has a 50cc engine. Flat tyre is the least of your worries - the paper in the window suggests that this car is pretty much shagged with lots of phrases such as "sold as seen", "no warranty" and "will need to be trailered". I imagine the bit of paper that has fallen inside would have said "You'll only buy this if you're a mentalist".
 


Last up, a pretty tidy Maestro. Unlicensed since '98, this 1600cc Heather-tronic ROAD ROCKET probably got your gran back from bingo before her mates had even capped their dobbers. As with the others, the young age when parked up means it's not in bad nick with no signs of the normal grot.

So I know a couple of people liked the Ford ETIS link I shared, so I thought I'd do a bit of digging and see what other sites I can use. Feel free to add anything else you can find around the realms of "finding out information on cars"
 
Update 21/12/2018
 
 
Registration Enquiries
 
https://totalcarcheck.co.uk/
Doesn't need a make and model so can check any plate and tell you what car it is
Gives colour/engine, Tax/MOT dates plus pass/fail for previous MOTs (with notes), plus CO2 level and tax cost https://vehicleenquiry.service.gov.uk/Now doesn't need manufacturer - just reg. Only returns the manufacturer though, not the model.Gives colour, engine size, Tax and MOT expiry dates, plus can tell you last owner change if you supply V5 ref num https://www.check-mot.service.gov.uk/Now doesn't need manufacturer - just reg. Returns manufacturer AND model, plus MOT history. https://cazana.com/ukGives MOT history, number plate changes (only if you search on new plate), and dates of owner changes(need account for full info - use "autoshite@mailinator.com" and "horseless") https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vehicle_registration_plates_of_the_United_Kingdom,_Crown_dependencies_and_overseas_territories#Local_memory_tagsRegistration plate locations (pre-2001 and new style) plus age identifiers, font information etc.  
Generic VIN Decoders
(Use these if there's no manufacturer specific)
 
http://www.vindecoderz.com/ - gives recall information plus original specs, not specific to car
http://en.vindecoder.pl/ - original standard and optional equipment details, from brochure
 
 
 
Registration VIN Conversion
 
http://www.blue-print.com/Newweb/index6_fs.asp
Searching for either a reg plate or a VIN gives you the opposite
This is now fully working - thanks Tam for letting me know.
You can use user:autoshite and password:HorseyHorseless for the odd lookup, I'd recommend if you're giving it a bit of hammer then create your own FREE account as I dare say they'll notice if we're all using it at the same time.
 
 
Manufacturers:
 
Audi
http://www.audiworld.com/forums/vindecoder.php
Gives some details of car, plus original (American) RRP and details from original brochure such as tyre sizes, standard equipment etc.
(Tested back to 1993)
http://prsearch.planetvag.com/
Lists "PR Codes" that are on the build sticker inside the boot - eg 1KD is Disc Brakes, Rear
 
BMW
http://bimmer.work/
Takes last 7 digits of VIN, spits out build config and option numbers
(Tested back to 1989)
http://www.realoem.com
Parts listing and diagrams for all cars and bikes back to the 70s (use Classic on the left hand side to see pre-2006). Can search by VIN
http://www.bmwstylewheels.com/
Wheel Database
 
Citroen
http://service.citroen.com/
(Username: AC11166778
password: horseless)
Type a VIN into the top left box, then choose Free Services -> Replacement Parts Documentation -> Vehicle Characteristics from the menu to see a build sheet.
You can also get loads of technical documents - BUT I think a lot of them are chargable.
Please don't change the password! We'll wait and see whether they get grumpy that the account gets accessed from all over the place.
Tested back to a 1989 Citroen AX
 
Ford
https://www.etis.ford.com/vehicleSelection.do
Can convert from VIN to Registration and vice versa, shows build options/paint/trim/date/engine config
Checked it back to 1993 cars, later cars have more info.
https://www.flickr.com/photos/61090099@N04/collections/72157627991393795/
A collection of Ford Brochures
 
Honda
http://www.techinfo.honda-eu.com/
MARIS - subscription based information lookup starting at 10 Euros for 1 hour
http://www.lingshondaparts.com/
Part numbers and diagrams for cars and bikes. Goes back to 1982 Civic but seems broken if you click the pictures of cars to choose - use the drop-downs at the top instead.
 
Jaguar
https://www.jaguarclassicparts.com/uk
Parts catalogues for Daimler Limousine,  Jaguar XJ Series III, XJ40, XJ-S, X300, X308, XK8. and some E-type
 
Mercedes
http://oudemercedesbrochures.nl/
Brochures and Press Releases from Early 1900s onwards
 
https://www.datamb.com/
VIN decoder with build sheets, options, colour and trim etc
 
MG Rover
http://www.mg-rover.info/get_info.htm
MGF Onwards (1997+?) - gives loads of information
http://www.rimmerbros.co.uk/content--name-MG-Rover-200-25-MG-ZR-Vehicle-Information
Loads of stuff on engine number decoding, transmission specs from number, option codes etc
https://www.flickr.com/photos/61090099@N04/collections/72157629742280625/
Collections of Brochures
 
MINI
http://www.realoem.com
Parts listing and diagrams for all models. Can search by VIN
 
Peugeot
http://www.museepeugeot.com/en/aventure-peugeot-museum/peugeot-classic-spare-parts.html
Spare part guides for -03, -04 and -05 series Peugeot models
http://public.servicebox.peugeot.com/pages/index.jsp
Spare Parts and VIN lookup for all models INCLUDING WHICH DIESEL PUMP IT HAS, VEG-LICKERS
(User ID: AN02992875  password: h0rsele55)
http://www.miamistu.co.uk/pug/
205/309/405 Part Diagrams
 
 
Vauxhall
http://ecat24.com/opel/catalog/vinsearch
Gives car type/colour/configuration and entire build sheet
Also has part number lookup
 
https://opel.7zap.com/en/car/
Part diagrams all the way back to Nova/Mk2 Cav
 
 
Volkswagen
https://erwin.volkswagen.de/erwin/showOrderFlatrateAssistant.do
Subscription based service information lookup starting at 7 euros for 1 hour
http://igorweb.org/equidec.aspx
Build Codes Decoder - type in the M numbers from the sticker in the boot
http://www.oemepc.com/
Web-based representation of the EKTA parts catalogue - lists all parts used from the 70s until present.
 
Volvo
https://tis.volvocars.biz/tis/searchProducts.do
Service manuals and wiring diagrams back to 1992
(username: autoshite    password: horseless)
 
 
Cross-Manufacturer Parts Lists
http://catcar.info/en/
A whole heap of exploded parts diagrams for most cars I could think of.
Could someone sense-check the part numbers it dishes out as I can't confirm if they're all manufacturers own, or specific to this site.
 
 
Paint
 
http://coloronline.glasurit.com/index.php?language=8
Search for colour codes (* is a wildcard), tells you which other names a paint is known by to help matching parts from eBay.
 
 
Radio Codes
 
http://www.radio-code.lt/
Decodes a massive amount of radio codes for absolutely free!
Login: autoshite@mailinator.com
Pass: Horsele55

Quite often any scruffy vehicles on a really late registration are merely on their way to a good old Bilking.

Barely anyone ever ticked the "random fencepost" option on the 306, good to see an example exists.

Yeah the old Rainworth Skoda dealer (in Rainworth, scarily enough) is now Spectrum used car and car rental, I was down there today in fact.
 
Southwell Road has become the only place where dealers exist now, all in crappy generic glass boxes. There's Citroen in the old MGRover place, Mercedes Benz, Sunwin Renault, Peugeot behind them, and then GK Ford's new place with the GK Mazda afterthought further down.
 
Back towards Mansfield, and the Subaru/Daihatsu/Proton dealer next to Watermeadows looks like this
 

 
There was a bit of the boarding missing, and a peek inside showed a load of Daihatsu promo posters.... but I'd need to break off more boarding to gain access and it was broad daylight. Plus the "feral child" possibility was strong in there.....

Had a trip up to the Commercial Vehicle Museum in Leyland, because why not.
 
It's a good start when this is in their carpark...

 
Drinking and Driving is bad, mkay, but apparently you needed a stiff drink after piloting this

 
Anyone remember the Scampi Fries advert with the Roadrunner driving out of the sea? This is the scale model they used

 
TEH FEWTURE

If cars were valued on how good they were as cars, the Mini would be free with a box of cornflakes. Stuff finds it's own value, the Sierra was OK in the whole and groundbreaking at launch.
 
Maybe Old School Fords aren't as good as people make out, but they are a part of history and it's nice to preserve examples. And if Steve, a 38 year old team leader for Gloucester who has just come into a bit of money off the back of Uncle Wilf kicking the bucket, wants to blow £22k on a Cossie or £5k on an XR3i or £1000 on a wreck of a Sierra just like his dad had, then fucking let him. I'd rather see this at a show than many sportscars.

I'm up for this

Oh, I went to it. It was lovely

Five stars, would watch Deltic go back and forth again
 

I'm up for this

Oh, I went to it. It was lovely

Five stars, would watch Deltic go back and forth again
 

I'm up for this

Oh, I went to it. It was lovely

Five stars, would watch Deltic go back and forth again
 

I'm up for this

Oh, I went to it. It was lovely

Five stars, would watch Deltic go back and forth again
 

Astra I walked past this morning.
Looks complete apart from missing plates, although not clear if the back one rotted out or was removed.
 
Also, someone has hacksawed through both roof rails, leaving the curved ends. Are they made of lead or something?

Here's a teaser.
Next to the headlamp switch there's a blanking plate. There's a blanking plate on every single Mk1 Mondeo I've ever been in. Round.
My bosses old Ghia X leather cruise fancy stereo fuel computer every option ticked model had a blanking plate.
The ones in the brochures all have blanking plates, despite them being posh fully optioned models.
 
What on earth is that hole made for??!? It's been bugging me for 10 bloody years.

Piggy back blade fuse into the fuse box is the way I do these...

Ebay Tat: Things that are worth owning.
Ebay Bargains: Things that are not bargains.

What's the pile of bricks for?

I went-a-hunting on the same site after I'd posted, saw an identical car the other way around in the background of another shot (with a maroon two-slot wheeltrimmed sierra in the foreground) but thought "oh wait, no, that's a three-door model" I remember the Urba well, really digged the interior!

First rule of Black Boothandle Club is you don't talk about Black Boothandle Club.
 
Second rule is 10% off powertools over £250 and you get a free diamond drillbit set.

At least the hoodlums broke back into the car and reinstalled the gearbox. That was lucky.

Whereas the last gearbox I left lying around at my mums was still on the front garden two weeks later and I had to get rid MYSELF!! Typical!

At least the hoodlums broke back into the car and reinstalled the gearbox. That was lucky.

Barely anyone ever ticked the "random fencepost" option on the 306, good to see an example exists.

At least the hoodlums broke back into the car and reinstalled the gearbox. That was lucky.

Coming soon to a newsagents near you.....
 

Beetles are notorious for being like automotive armadillos - smooth and shiny exterior, utterly squishy underneath. Most of this is because they were unloved as "classic" cars in the 90s (given that they were still in production, that's understandable), they were dirt cheap. Because they were dirt cheap, they were bought by penniless people. Who then couldn't afford to actually keep the car in good order, so each MOT would just see another layer of underseal over a heater channel hole.
 
Also, once the popularity picked up, a million garages rebranded as Custom VW shops. The wob tanker would arrive on a Monday and unload 25,000 gallons and the rest of the week it would be used to cover up rust and "smooth" bits of any old Beetle-shaped crap they found in the free ads, generally in place of that tedious welding lark. A quick blow-over in something pastel, lob a set of Astra GTE seats in, sorted.