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Roffle

Mission Accomplished - Mondeo in Midlandland

Roffle

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112 replies to this topic

#91 OFFLINE   bangernomics

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Posted 12 December 2018 - 08:05 PM

Immediately swears off roffles forever.



Oh roffle
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#92 OFFLINE   Saabnut

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Posted 12 December 2018 - 08:18 PM

Thank feck for that! I have had remorse ever since saying I would, now I can relax again! :-)


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#93 OFFLINE   djoptix

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Posted 12 December 2018 - 08:20 PM

Fucker!
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Shit you are brave taking one of these on, they really are hopeless.


#94 OFFLINE   Ohdearme

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Posted 12 December 2018 - 08:31 PM

I would like to extend my thanks to those that put their head on the block to shift this and offered to ask the proverbial ugly bird to the dance, I can only apologise that one of you is going to endure the horror of waking up next to her.

Gadget Gricey, console yourself that much like a morning after tryst when the beer goggles have worn off, she’s still not too* bad if you squint a bit.

Wife is pleased, “Great! When are they getting that shit off my drive?”
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Audi A1 Sport Diseasel - Wife shite
Ford Galuxury 2.0 Aspen

Ford Mondeo Ghia X - Roffling Off

SAAB 9-5 Aero Estate - MOT disasterz
Mazda 3 1.4 - Borrowed Dad shite -
Saab 9-5 2.3lpt - Roffled Off - Pending Collect

 


#95 ONLINE   The Moog

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Posted 12 December 2018 - 08:41 PM

Mr Gadget will love this!

1999 - 406 2.0 hdi 90
1991 - Eunos Track beast
2003 - Getz

1990 - Rover 800 820si - On the farm 

 

 


#96 ONLINE   gadgetgricey

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Posted 12 December 2018 - 09:50 PM

o shit.........

now need to come up with a cunning plan.....

best not to type anything now as just finished a 2nd bottle of newcastle'[s finest.

 

just realised as well, need to tell the wife


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75 CDT Auto Tourer

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#97 ONLINE   Jim Bell

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Posted 12 December 2018 - 09:55 PM

I think you'd best offer her a bottle and have her sit down for the good news mate.
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858735.png


#98 OFFLINE   Ohdearme

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Posted 14 December 2018 - 12:46 PM

A convoluted sequence of events have enabled me to deliver the Mondy to the lucky* winner on Monday.

First stop is to drive 30 miles in the wrong direction.

What gives?

Well, I agreed ages back via Shitely Express to smuggle a set of Ovolv wheels down south but they are north relative to me:)

Turns out their destination south is close enough to Gadget for me to stash the Ovlovs in the boot and entrust him with final delivery of them evacuee style to a kindly Vicar. There they will stay under his care until an East/West connection can be made...

Wary of the task ahead, I’ve taxed it and fired it up for a run around this weekend prior to a long run down the M1/42.

Got to work alive, visibility although fine feels like I’m in a pillar box relative to the Glasshouse that is the Galaxy.

Heated windscreen working* it’s magic this morning.

ebf2a4196edf698f126b694f6070e5bc.jpg

The EML light is still on and has continued to stay on, occasionally flashing.

I suspect it is only flashing to try and outshine the snazzy ice warning light that switches from orange at 1-3 degrees to OMGREDZ at zero or below... a feature discovered today.

78984d3cb61fa651496ce12b2ca36fbf.jpg

As for what that EML means?

Car has a bit of hesitancy between 1500-2000 revs and then goes back to behaving normally, in manual mode it won’t rev past 4K (safe mode?) but in auto will happily rev past but power feels restricted, not an issue around town and it gets to 70 so should be alright for a roffle win.

My diagnosis extended to poking under the bonnet and checking for anything loose sensor wise. No dice, I don’t have an odb dongle lying about either so the pleasure* of resolving will fall to Gadget.

Mondy Monday awaits...
  • The Moog, Saabnut, BeEP and 3 others like this

Audi A1 Sport Diseasel - Wife shite
Ford Galuxury 2.0 Aspen

Ford Mondeo Ghia X - Roffling Off

SAAB 9-5 Aero Estate - MOT disasterz
Mazda 3 1.4 - Borrowed Dad shite -
Saab 9-5 2.3lpt - Roffled Off - Pending Collect

 


#99 ONLINE   gadgetgricey

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Posted 14 December 2018 - 03:05 PM

I'd already got my dongle ready for such an event  :)


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Current fleet

 

75 CDT Auto Tourer

ZT-T Diesel Manual

LPG 4.0 Jeep Grand Cherokee WJ

Saab 9-3 Convertible 

Mazda RX8

Freelander V6

Focus 1.6 Auto

 


#100 ONLINE   The Moog

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Posted 14 December 2018 - 03:23 PM

I'd already got my dongle ready for such an event  :)

Show off! 


1999 - 406 2.0 hdi 90
1991 - Eunos Track beast
2003 - Getz

1990 - Rover 800 820si - On the farm 

 

 


#101 OFFLINE   Saabnut

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Posted 14 December 2018 - 03:33 PM

I'd already got my dongle ready for such an event  :)

 

Oi! This is a family* forum! What you do in your own time should remain private!


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#102 OFFLINE   Ohdearme

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Posted 14 December 2018 - 10:10 PM

Despite the lack of a radio and the faint whine above 40mph of the wheel bearing I forgot just how competent at being CAR this thing is, the heated seat is great, it’s spritely off the line, makes a decent noise and is generally very comfy.

On the way for the wheels, this happened too.

b2a3a0abf57f70e0f5db0a8cd4b2214b.jpg

So I’ve managed to rattle around in it for at least a thousand miles.

I went to collect the Volvo wheels and discovered the wife had been using my shiters as a filing system.

Anything in the Galaxy = Take to tip
Anything in the Mondy = Chazza shop

This was never discussed with me and caused me mild consternation opening the boot to fill it full of vulva wheels and being met with an assortment of goodwill shite.

Dropped seats and hey presto all fits, ready for Monday.

55110efc6285e79e1254dee995e9cb0e.jpg

Got to spend more time with the EML issue, Shipley is a hilly land and the car dissent like the steep hills at all, suggests maybe a fuelling issue like an injector? Otherwise the car behaves fine except between 1800-2000.

It can be driven around with the tiptronic or by squeezing past halfway on the go pedal to trigger a one gear kickdown that gets the revs outnof the problem zone.

It also needs a temp setting of 22.25 degrees as 22 is too cold and 23 is too hot for me.

Audi A1 Sport Diseasel - Wife shite
Ford Galuxury 2.0 Aspen

Ford Mondeo Ghia X - Roffling Off

SAAB 9-5 Aero Estate - MOT disasterz
Mazda 3 1.4 - Borrowed Dad shite -
Saab 9-5 2.3lpt - Roffled Off - Pending Collect

 


#103 OFFLINE   Ohdearme

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Posted 14 December 2018 - 10:17 PM

Whilst driving around, I was pleased to see the duffed display lights had fixed themselves.

This was a surprise as I’d done nothing to fix it.

It was therefore less of a surprise two minutes later when the dash went out again.

I suspect it is a faulty dimmer switch as it was fine until I touched it.

Part comes with all the headlight switch too but as I confirmed with a fumble in queuing traffic, the whole unit comes out easy enough and is only about £15 quid.

https://rover.ebay.c...tm/123340975169

Audi A1 Sport Diseasel - Wife shite
Ford Galuxury 2.0 Aspen

Ford Mondeo Ghia X - Roffling Off

SAAB 9-5 Aero Estate - MOT disasterz
Mazda 3 1.4 - Borrowed Dad shite -
Saab 9-5 2.3lpt - Roffled Off - Pending Collect

 


#104 OFFLINE   Ohdearme

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Posted 17 December 2018 - 04:47 PM

A relaxing morning of M number bingo went without incident and I’m now setting off Vicar-wards.

Nothing of note on the morning run, it held about 30mpg and an indicated 74 seems to cancel out the wheel bearing drone.

Onwards, whether I can see my speedo is however in the lap of the illumination gods. They gave up near Sheffield today...

Yay!
fd8629f8738a9a0f4321f18b47fcb908.jpg

Nay!
d3c16642d9f6d515ecf96725235611f9.jpg
  • Jim Bell and mrbenn like this

Audi A1 Sport Diseasel - Wife shite
Ford Galuxury 2.0 Aspen

Ford Mondeo Ghia X - Roffling Off

SAAB 9-5 Aero Estate - MOT disasterz
Mazda 3 1.4 - Borrowed Dad shite -
Saab 9-5 2.3lpt - Roffled Off - Pending Collect

 


#105 OFFLINE   Ohdearme

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Posted 17 December 2018 - 06:13 PM

Wheels deposited, en route to final destination and a fellow shiter.

I somehow lost the blob of blu tac that acts as my phone mount in this car, will therefore have satnav via talking testicles for the final leg as no place else to wedge it.

Audi A1 Sport Diseasel - Wife shite
Ford Galuxury 2.0 Aspen

Ford Mondeo Ghia X - Roffling Off

SAAB 9-5 Aero Estate - MOT disasterz
Mazda 3 1.4 - Borrowed Dad shite -
Saab 9-5 2.3lpt - Roffled Off - Pending Collect

 


#106 OFFLINE   sutty2006

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Posted 17 December 2018 - 07:55 PM

Them bulbs are dead easy to replace. Just so ya know ;)

Sideways is the only way forwards!

 

1976 Manta B coupe

1987 Manta Hatch 16valve

1989 Mercury Grand Marquis

1992 Vauxhall carlton 2.3TD

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#107 OFFLINE   Ohdearme

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Posted 17 December 2018 - 08:07 PM

Them bulbs are dead easy to replace. Just so ya know ;)


Bulbs are fine, I think it’s the dimmer switch that’s on the blink as they’re intermittent.

It’s a puzzle for the official new owner of the Mondy as I’m now safely back at my hotel having delivered it to Gadget.

No exchange pic but here’s one of some lovely samosas provided on handover as payment for my travails and to avoid the horror of hotel food.

Top shiter, would deal again, etc.

3ef7e258e555bcc87e0db0a2dcb2543a.jpg
  • The Moog, purplebargeken, Jim Bell and 2 others like this

Audi A1 Sport Diseasel - Wife shite
Ford Galuxury 2.0 Aspen

Ford Mondeo Ghia X - Roffling Off

SAAB 9-5 Aero Estate - MOT disasterz
Mazda 3 1.4 - Borrowed Dad shite -
Saab 9-5 2.3lpt - Roffled Off - Pending Collect

 


#108 OFFLINE   sutty2006

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Posted 17 December 2018 - 08:12 PM

Great story. I might have a headlight switch somewhere in my old stock of mondego parts as the dimmer is inclusive of the switch. Do miss my old Mk3s. Had a mk2 ghia estate turn up outside the workshop today. Nearly wet myself. My work colleagues think I’m strange.
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Sideways is the only way forwards!

 

1976 Manta B coupe

1987 Manta Hatch 16valve

1989 Mercury Grand Marquis

1992 Vauxhall carlton 2.3TD

2005 Discovery 3


#109 OFFLINE   purplebargeken

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Posted 17 December 2018 - 08:16 PM

My work colleagues think I’m strange. 

 

I can only see that as a positive tbh.


Hyundai i10 auto - white goods car shite
Triumph Toledo - 2.0 for added sleeper shite
Rover 45 Club - CVT easy gear change shite
Triumph Dolomite 1300 - unsullied shite


#110 OFFLINE   Ohdearme

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Posted 17 December 2018 - 08:44 PM

Great story. I might have a headlight switch somewhere in my old stock of mondego parts as the dimmer is inclusive of the switch.


Yep, I did a quick exploratory poke and it’s easy to get out, just pull open the cubby to the right of the wheel and reach up.

There’s a flexy rubber that can be pushed up and the unit presses out as a full unit.

Easy fix, etc...
  • Jim Bell likes this

Audi A1 Sport Diseasel - Wife shite
Ford Galuxury 2.0 Aspen

Ford Mondeo Ghia X - Roffling Off

SAAB 9-5 Aero Estate - MOT disasterz
Mazda 3 1.4 - Borrowed Dad shite -
Saab 9-5 2.3lpt - Roffled Off - Pending Collect

 


#111 ONLINE   gadgetgricey

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Posted 17 December 2018 - 10:37 PM

Great story. I might have a headlight switch somewhere in my old stock of mondego parts as the dimmer is inclusive of the switch. Do miss my old Mk3s. Had a mk2 ghia estate turn up outside the workshop today. Nearly wet myself. My work colleagues think I’m strange.


If you do manage to locate the switch, drop me a pm.
Would rather beer tokens to your way, rather than eBay.
Likewise if you have four wheel bolts for when I try and get the locking wheel nuts off, that would also be grand.

Cheers

Current fleet

 

75 CDT Auto Tourer

ZT-T Diesel Manual

LPG 4.0 Jeep Grand Cherokee WJ

Saab 9-3 Convertible 

Mazda RX8

Freelander V6

Focus 1.6 Auto

 


#112 OFFLINE   sutty2006

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Posted 18 December 2018 - 06:20 AM

If you do manage to locate the switch, drop me a pm.
Would rather beer tokens to your way, rather than eBay.
Likewise if you have four wheel bolts for when I try and get the locking wheel nuts off, that would also be grand.

Cheers


I’ve more than likely got them too. Might even have a set of locking nuts with a key. I’ll check on Friday when i go up to my unit. Anything else while I’m there?

Sideways is the only way forwards!

 

1976 Manta B coupe

1987 Manta Hatch 16valve

1989 Mercury Grand Marquis

1992 Vauxhall carlton 2.3TD

2005 Discovery 3


#113 OFFLINE   Ohdearme

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Posted 18 December 2018 - 07:47 AM

Given the Mondy spent its life at a main stealers, I’m betting they’re a standard Ford set

Audi A1 Sport Diseasel - Wife shite
Ford Galuxury 2.0 Aspen

Ford Mondeo Ghia X - Roffling Off

SAAB 9-5 Aero Estate - MOT disasterz
Mazda 3 1.4 - Borrowed Dad shite -
Saab 9-5 2.3lpt - Roffled Off - Pending Collect

 






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