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ETG's shoddy shite fettling - Joined the Porker Club!


Exiled_Tat_Gatherer

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So, as any good autoshiter knows - if you have a hankering for an estate (insert other car here) you of course make sure you have all bases covered and end up with 3 of them...... I (we) decided the weekend was the perfect (only) time to get over and collect the motor of much cheapness (other estate is cheapness of tin foil variety so this was second placed). Minime has collection-eered before and loves it, so no worries there. 

Up at crack of Dawn - she's a game girl - and a decently healthyish breakfast was had...... 

 

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and out the door with munchkin

 

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with suitable cards, wallets, foliage and other important paper type shite...

 

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to utilise the Choo Choo number1

 

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which saw successful crossing of much water without a drop on us.....thankfully - we were happy about that.

 

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To celebrate - we spent the day whiling away the hours before we avoided a well respected shiter..... so we saw a lot of things like this

 

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and enjoyed sunshine.... as it got dark - we headed to that battlefield memorial that is a struggle of even greater forces even to this day..... Waterloo. Got on this - 

 

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which then stood fucking still for an eternity..... while WhatsApp messages were pinged back n forth to keep vendor and gf informed we were royally fucked by the Rail that is SouthWestern...... as vendor works for them - I couldn't say too much. He's a nice chap.

 

Rocked up at almost 22 of those daily hours..... gf was nice goth rock lady that munchkin liked a lot. Papers were thrown at each other..... key turned - trundled off into the darkness. 

It was at this point I realised I hadn't watched as taxi man got us to the address..... so had no clue as to the way out. 30mins later..... a main road. 5mins after that - motorway. 

Navigator had given up and I was on my own.......

 

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HS2 nightmare that is blockage - meant hotel was achieved at midnight with sleeping navigator over my shoulder. 5hrs sleep and a day of rest beckoned...... 

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Day of rest........... day of rest........... not for the wicked fella - or the autoshiter.

Docs held health markings...

 

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but were soundly ignored and we headed off........

 

Munchkin loved the carpark contents too

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 but decided the bloke in the car 2 from ours was the winner

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before I got him into Brands..... and the Fords and Alfas showed off their style.

One of these

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couple of these

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and quite a few of these

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before classic territory was found in the land that rust forgot......

Lovely

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Nice - pity the live axle hindered these

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proper hard-on material right there.....

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and we entered a stand that was indeed grand...... to see some of these

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and these

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and of course the BTCC final races - which of course are on the bloody iPad! Bugger

 

We then headed home - Channel Tunnel Police did an NPC check...... see if it was stolen as I rocked up last minute without a booking - the site was down. They knew - but whatever...... 

He then commented I had to be the worst car thief in the world if all I could manage was the estate I was in......... munchkin would not have been impressed - but....... true to form - 

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So I tonked home......... he woke up and loudly proclaimed - WOOLLARD!!! Whereupon I recovered control of the car and pulled that bad bitch over

 

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then home to the land of beer and waffles.... not a hiccup - car is great - not even thinking of consumption and it'll do fine for the tow duties I have need of completion.

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Bramz7 avoided me like the plague - let his gf do the handover and I only know what he looks like from the photos around the place...... his recent posting - the only conclusion he's still breathing! Perfect seller - would annoy again! 

 

Cheers Katie - for dealing with us at stupid o'clock and apologies to your neighbours - no lights and no numbers led to a search for your place with munchkin becoming a bit vocal about it.

 

All in all - smooth as silk. Let's hope the T5 from Craig goes a bit better in a few weeks........this may turn into a fleet thread I think.

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I had enough trouble finding Bramz' house in the day! He wasn't in then either, his girlfriend is used to it all by now I bet.

 

 

Totally get it - that night there were sod all street lights and out of the houses had no numbers...... triggering security lights wasn't on the plan to find said address..... got there in the end

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Everyone who has come to mine seems to get lost, even Deliveroo, Ikea etc, I think only the postman knows! Has it's benefits though, living in a reasonable sized town but somehow lucking out and living down a quiet road with no parking restrictions....doesn't help my wallet of course.

 

Glad you had a good weekend, and I am sorry I wasn't around, my working hours are so unbelievably anti social that I may as well teach my other half to drive and get her to collect/sell all my cars.

 

I will pass on the thanks to Katie.

 

Regarding fuel use on the BMW, it seemed to do mid 30s on a motorway slog without issue, which was very pleasing. Unless you have to dump the throttle to overtake ditherers of course....

 

I actually miss it! Way more predictable than the Alfa, which is developing some creaks.

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  • 6 months later...

To turn this into a proper ongoing thread...….. I'll do a quick catch up and throw it all in together here for the moment.

Sooooo……………

 

this is still sitting in the naughty corner. E28 long gone sadly, but the Trump persists in darkening my life with it's twin SU shadow:

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It's been totally sorted welding wise and it now needs a none sympathetic engine and box swap...… No direction decided upon as of yet.

 

It shares garage space with 2 others for now - this:

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which will be run as it is - needs fettling a bit and next winter will mean 2 new wings going on.... but she's an ex giffer proper old charmer. Interior is minty perfect.

 

taking up space until I drop the axe -

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bought from Bramz - towed everything I needed moving, then pootled over to France, Poland etc... on holiday trips. Never missed a beat and was a fantastic bit of kit. I did look underneath and then bleached my eyes…. it's fucking fucked mate. Export special awaits.

 

I'll try and squeeze this in the corner too - as it'll be messed with to go on the track - bought with that sole intention and plans are afoot.

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that'll mean the garage is full - so one of these will live in front of het garage door - no idea as of yet - probably keep changing it around.

Tow beast - fast old bus and munchkin loves it...…. so it's staying until forever, apparently.

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Was to be the daily - but religious exhaust meaning locals are deafened and I sound like a southend seafront special.... to be rectified asap

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Current daily - ex-Josh and super lovely XJR6 - I've fallen in love with this thing already - so already looking at bushes, springs and shocks etc... as I'll be restoring her slowly and properly. This thing is just stunning……. pant accidents constantly.

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Only ended up collecting the spaff-mobile as this (in it's usual pose) left me high n dry in het wee hours in Scotto-shire. waiting to hear back from rescue rangers - but whirly electrickery gadget is suspected culprit so wallet prepared to be reamed. Little fucker is laughing at me - I can hear it, even from here.

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and currently being housed by a lovely shiter - I'm looking at someone moving it over for me in the coming weeks. It needs NO introduction ………….

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I have a couple of other piles of shite laying around…… need to take photo's and catch up on here. will do so and attempt to keep an ongoing fettling thread up to date. Expect 330CI exhaust mess and XJR underpinning inspections soon……….

 

Peace y'all

 

OH yeah - seller has gone silent on this one…….. so it may not appear again. Need ot find out I suppose……..

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Dailying a 24 year old blower Jag which will probably return between 15 and 20 MPG in mixed traffic really is the stuff of champions. Well done, and get those new tyres on before you encounter a wet roundabout! I've had these try to bite back on me a few times, and it is an interesting feeling when 1.8 tonnes of Jag violently shifts it's centre of gravity.

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When we had our holiday house in the Auvergne there was a fairly high-level karting operation close by which used to hire out karts to the public - rarely had to book either 'cos in the middle of nowhere, just park up and drive.  This place: https://www.kartescale.com/.

 

We used to make the trip every time we were at the house - there were usually enough uncles and cousins around to make a decent session out of it, and my dad's side of the family are all very competitive so it got quite serious at times, but still great fun.  The most difficult part I found was getting back in the car after a long session and having to remember that I wasn't in a go-kart any more - a Volvo 240 doesn't take kindly to being lobbed into a 90o bend at 50mph...

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Club level karting in the UK (i.e. MSA level stuff) is an unbelievably competitive and viscous sport. My brother used to do it with me/rest of family doing the spannering. It’s just tough work and hard to find the fun aspect from it when all is said and done. Much nicer to have a go in the corporate carts in a less competitive fashion on a lazy afternoon I’d imagine. Also competitive karting is so expensive that it makes dailying an XJR palatable by comparison!

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Bugger - a kindly AS'er has erminded me I also own (and it's been 'mine' for over a fucking year now!!!) this lovely piece of skank

 

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I keep on forgetting about it - Craig keeps on ripping out kitchens and transporting them off into the nether with it - and of course the only time I got over to collect - the fucking thing wouldn't start!

I'm off to book up travel and sort getting this bitch back here for (now redundant) lugging-shit-around duties.

Can't find shots of het exterior - but it's hanging...…… I mean REALLY hanging. What do you expect for £50

 

 

 

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Yup it's super grim. I love it!! So does my lad. My wife hates it. But grudgingly borrowed it for short notice car booting last weekend. Amazingly it hasn't FTP-d since that frustrating snowy day last March. I wonder if the fuel had somehow drained to the wrong end of the tank.

 

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We've clocked up* tons of miles throwing the bikes in the back and going for rides. I suspect when this ones away I'll be on the lookout for another Volvo estate. Just too damn useful these things!

 

*Odometer stuck on 67k for at least the last ten years, because Volvo

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I appear to have bought another car………. it's one of those itch cratching moments/summers…….. It's all your fault SiC! Hopefully collect with minime this Sat am.

If this one is as good as I expect - it will mean a couple of For Sales in the near future. But I always say something along those lines!

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OK - pending clearance of payment made ……. and this is a stock photo - curse you network system firewalls! But I have now joined the Porker club - without the weight gain I hope.

 

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was hoping to collect this weekend - but other plans with munchkin mean it'll be a fly by night next week I think.

Thanks to SiC for mentioning the For Sale on the blue forum...…. tis now mine.

 

The only downside........ A thinning of the fleet may be needed - as much as I love the vehicles I have, I just won't have the time to drive all of them.

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Non stock photo

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http://forum.retro-rides.org/thread/208866/2001-porsche-boxster-woking-reduced

 

Good buy and a bargain at that!

 

Your fleet doesn't need to be as big anymore as this will probably be the one driven the most. When I get in mine and go for a drive, all my worries and problems go away for that short period.

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