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For Chod & Ulster - North of Ireland Mini-Meet @ Ballyclare Auctions: 8/08 PICS - Next meet 5 Sept??

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#31 OFFLINE   Datsuncog

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Posted 31 July 2018 - 10:10 AM

On a slightly less flippant note, Ballyclare also has a weird, twilight car dealer that's never open when I'm driving past and looks semi-abandoned, but still has this in the window...

 

20180516_212936.jpg


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#32 OFFLINE   Datsuncog

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Posted 02 August 2018 - 11:05 AM

Right kids - less than a week to go now!

 

http://ballyclaremotorauction.co.uk

 

Auction begins on Wednesday at 7pm, though the website cheerily states "Come early to view our great selection" and "Vehicles for all price ranges."

 

Apparently, "Vehicles are generally auctioned at very affordable prices, ranging from £150-£10000."

 

Well, one of those prices ticks my box for affordable...

 

 

For those of you who haven't been up this way before, it's not too hard to find; the premises are fairly visible from the main A57 Templepatrick Road.

 

Ballyclare Auctions 1.png

 

If you're coming off the M2 motorway from Templepatrick direction, it's the next left just after the big Maxol garage before you get to Ballyclare itself; pull off at the sign for Ballyclare and then take another left straight after, to hook round to the auction shed.

 

Ballyclare Auctions 2.png

 

Unfortunately, unlike Wilsons at Mallusk, it appears that Ballyclare Auctions don't post up photos and descriptions of the cars entered for the next auction - which I suppose adds to the element of suspense, but means you don't get to spend a week salivating at the prospect of a chewed-up Volvo V40 with a cracked screen that looks like it's led a hard life as a very small bin lorry, yet inexplicably has a £1200 reserve on it.

 

Come one, come all!

 

Kinda looking forward to it, though I have precisely zero plans to bid for anything.

 

Although... with MrsDC's Yaris in for its MOT tonight, who knows how circumstances may change in the blink of an eye?


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#33 OFFLINE   The_Equalizer

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Posted 02 August 2018 - 11:28 AM

Ten grand - classic. I've yet to see anything break £2K. My Benz has been relegated to a garage near Lisburn for a 'wiggle in the bum' which I presume is dickie bushes on the rear. Should it fail to emerge by Wednesday I'll dust off my 1980s Dawes Galaxy.

 

For those that love chod, this auction will make you weep (especially if you win something).


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#34 OFFLINE   Datsuncog

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Posted 02 August 2018 - 02:16 PM

Fair play to you if you bike it, that's a heck of a hill coming out of town! (Fun on the way back, mind.)

 

Will likely be there in the Subaru Forester, complete with AS sticker to the rear to aid fellow-shiter recognition.

 

20180531_212112.jpg

 

I may also go full FANBOI and wear my Autoshite t-shirt and all.

 

Steady.


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#35 OFFLINE   Faker

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Posted 07 August 2018 - 01:03 PM

Right shite hunters!!! Tomorrow it's date night at ballyclare auctions!
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reliving my youth

#36 OFFLINE   Faker

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Posted 07 August 2018 - 01:03 PM

Who's all going?!
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#37 OFFLINE   Datsuncog

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Posted 07 August 2018 - 02:35 PM

Should be!


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#38 OFFLINE   The_Equalizer

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Posted 07 August 2018 - 02:55 PM

Me too.


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#39 OFFLINE   They_all_do_that_sir

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Posted 07 August 2018 - 03:15 PM

Should be there!

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#40 OFFLINE   Faker

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Posted 07 August 2018 - 03:20 PM

Should be there!
Sent from my F3211 using Tapatalk


You be there ya ballix!
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#41 OFFLINE   Datsuncog

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Posted 07 August 2018 - 03:28 PM

If I can make it there and back without my car imploding, that'll be a 100% improvement rate on the last time.

Faker - got a big box of models for you and all!


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#42 OFFLINE   Datsuncog

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Posted 08 August 2018 - 08:49 AM

Good news! Dropped the long-lost R9UKE of this parish a line, and he's planning on coming along to Ballyclare tonight for the craic.

Can't wait to see what he's driving.


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#43 OFFLINE   The_Equalizer

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Posted 08 August 2018 - 12:24 PM

Presuming that fellow Autoshiters aren't really that different from the general public and don't have two heads or similar, it's dawned on me that I've no idea what anyone looks like. Without trying to make this sound like a bad blind date, I'll have a red jumper on. Feel free to come and say hello (or not) as the mood takes you. Oh and I'll be in my slightly rough round the edges (aren't they all) 'resale silver' CLK230 cab. Cheers, Pete.


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#44 OFFLINE   Datsuncog

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Posted 08 August 2018 - 12:41 PM

Grand job!

 

Planning on wearing my Autoshite tee to aid recognition, hopefully we'll manage to make ourselves known to each other!

 

Think Faker said he's planning on wearing one of his Talbot rally jackets, but around Ballyclare direction that may not be a great help...

 

Spudgun, Bottom.jpg

 

 

 

 


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#45 OFFLINE   Faker

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Posted 08 August 2018 - 04:10 PM

I'll be wearing a Peugeot talbot sport top!
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#46 OFFLINE   The_Equalizer

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Posted 08 August 2018 - 06:33 PM

I'm trying to spot blokes in Peugeot Talbot and Autoshite tops! That said, typically there are shed loads in red tops. I'm the one with a red jumper over a shirt.
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#47 OFFLINE   Faker

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Posted 08 August 2018 - 10:23 PM

Datsuncog will be along shortly with a few qualities of picturgraphs... but until then.... this beauty went through the ring tonight!

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#48 OFFLINE   The_Equalizer

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Posted 09 August 2018 - 08:21 AM

Datsuncog will be along shortly with a few qualities of picturgraphs... but until then.... this beauty went through the ring tonight!

 

It was only bid to £800 (I think). It's for sale here for slightly more:

 

https://www.carandcl...uk/car/C1019593

 

Very good to met you two by the way.


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#49 OFFLINE   Datsuncog

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Posted 09 August 2018 - 09:20 AM

It was only bid to £800 (I think). It's for sale here for slightly more:

 

https://www.carandcl...uk/car/C1019593

 

Yeah, I'm not quite sure what the result was at the auction's end either - sold or not - but it did look pretty clean. Even £1350's not a lot for something that's such a rarity these days. But auctions like this do sort of confuse me, which is why I hardly ever bid...

 

The seller is the guy I thought it was, though; I recognise the house and the other Soviet chod in the background of the Car & Classic pics! An original local Riva saloon in so-very beige, and another dark red estate.

 

Decent spud: my Volvo 240 came from him (and was sold back to him too) while AdamMcC's Marina coupe also passed through his hands. The shiter community is close-knit around these parts...

 

Very good to met you two by the way.

 

Likewise! Great to finally be able to put faces to names; and I'd be up for making this a semi-regular thing.

 

Fuller write-up to follow soon...



#50 ONLINE   davehedgehog31

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Posted 09 August 2018 - 09:37 AM

Grand job!

 

Planning on wearing my Autoshite tee to aid recognition, hopefully we'll manage to make ourselves known to each other!

 

Think Faker said he's planning on wearing one of his Talbot rally jackets, but around Ballyclare direction that may not be a great help...

 

attachicon.gifSpudgun, Bottom.jpg

 

Thats my mate Spudgun


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#51 OFFLINE   Datsuncog

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Posted 09 August 2018 - 12:23 PM

Thats my mate Spudgun


Yeah, he was there, over by the burger van - didn't see you around though?



#52 OFFLINE   Datsuncog

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Posted 09 August 2018 - 02:37 PM

Righty-o, then... Ballyclare Auctions! The very first sort-of, not-quite, kind-of Autoshite Ulster meet-up. And in a suitably shite location.

I'd love to say that it'd been a while since I was at an auction, but in truth I'd been nosing around Wilson's in Mallusk only the evening before.

However, Wilson's was just the usual scorecard of unloved out-of-contract 13-plate Insignia Ecoflexes, waiting for some luckless bastard to come and play gearbox roulette with them.

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Ballyclare, on the other hand, was serving up something much more appealing to the Autoshite palate.

And not just the cheesy chips from the catering trailer, either.

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First up, I was running late as an indirect result of Yaris MOT/brakepipe shenanigans, documented elsewhere, resulting in a spirited drive up and over the New Line past Ballynure in L'il Thunder (who is beginning to sound a little too thundery in my opinion; an exhaust replacement may soon be on the cards).

Faker was meanwhile still sweeping in from Up The Country complete with his towing rig on a trailer mercy mission, while They_All_Do_That_Sir wasn't running at all (next time though, yeah?).

It seem that only The_Equaliser managed to show up on time to witness the first wrecks going through the ring.

But oh, what wrecks.

By the time I came dashing through the gates just before 8pm, slightly pop-eyed and sans phone, a Citroen C3 Pluriel was just exiting the ring, the gentle sloshing of waterlogged footwells just about audible over the cacophony of slightly pinholed exhausts and creaking wishbones as the others lined up outside the shed complex, ready to take their turn. Outside, smiley Transits retrofitted with beavertails flanked the roads of the small industrial estate, while young fellas in Mk3 Golf vans barked into their CB radios.

This is auctioneering as I remember it from my childhood: dirty, smokey, and dripping assorted unspecified fluids.

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And that's just the punters. Arf.

Honestly though: look at this picture and tell me it doesn't look like it's 1995 all over again:

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What have we got? A big sign demanding a stern £50 on the fall of a hammer (assuming the vehicle in question reaches that amount), and another one dissuading complaints with a non-negotiable SOLD AS SEEN.
.
Auctioneer Billy calling his impenetrable cant as only someone living a stone's throw from Ballymena can:

"Ana fourhundredfourhundredfourhundredfourhundred anafourhundredfourhundredfourhundredfourhundred, an a quarter, a quarter, that's fourhundredquarterfourhundredquarter in the room, clean wee car, an a fourhundredquarterfourhundredquarterfourhundredquarterfourhundredquarter, have we fiftyfiftyfiftyfiftyfifty, anaquarteranaquarteranaquarter, tek her out, an a quarteranaquarteranaquarter, no more interest - " *BANG*

Then taking a big swig from his bottle of Coke, while his glamorous assistant shuffles a heap of V5s from one tray to the next, as the cars sputter on through.

Not a computer to be seen up top, either.

What looks like surly 12-year-old children driving the assorted heaps through the ring, revving the tits off them in the queue for the ring as instructed by punters looking for belching smoke.

Oh yes, and a bunch of lads lolling on a FUCKING LADA RIVA ESTATE, cool as you like.

Plus a fairly well rotten rubber-bumper MG Midget, with the mother of all tidemarks.

This is Autoshite, Ulster style. These lads don't even know they're shiters, it's that effortless.


So. With Faker, The_Equaliser and myself finally together and introductions made, roving eyes were cast over the cars lined up outside. I dashed back to the Subaru at this point to retrieve my phone but, with the light already dropping as summer begins its inexorable twist towards autumn, I'm afraid the following photos are a little sub-par. Of course, this may flatter the cars somewhat...

20180808_203532.jpg

Nice wee MGF, very similar to Warninglight's current roffle steed.

The 08 Saab Aero estate further down the line went for buttons, apparently. Northern Ireland has a lot of Saabs, for some reason - all of which are cheap, often ludicrously so. Bear that in mind, Scandi-shite fans...

Pre-facelift Vectra C is the not-so-very common saloon version, and therefore from some angles looks a bit like a Signum with arse implants.

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Gangsta-spec Rathcoole Edition A4; blacked out windows matching the blacked-out rust blebs on the wings. Be the coolest 18-year old dealer on your estate for a full week, until it either pops a seal somewhere critical or one of the crime lords twigs you're doing business on his turf and you end up with rather more ways of bending your knees than previously.

There were loads of shagged-looking VAG saloons going through the ring as it happens, likely ex-cab Piss-hats with intergalactic miles and breathing their last.

20180808_203632.jpg

Shouldn't there be a mirror here? Oh well. Least of its problems, probably. Didn't someone on here opine that cabs seem to go on forever while they're still their getting bi-monthly oil changes while running 24/7 and what-have-you, but as soon as they pass to private hands they deteriorate fast? Anyway, I wouldn't. So I didn't.

20180808_203622.jpg

S40 with invisible* bumper repair. I still maintain that black or silver cars are so popular round here because it makes gaffer tape repairs so much easier to blend in.

Oh here. what's this?

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A Fabia saloon. Again, not that common. Despite his mild Skoda addiction, Faker resisted. But beside it...

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Goodness me, a 59 plate Proton Persona Gen-2. In purple!

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And it's running on LPG, to boot. Fair few scuffs, mind.

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Into the ring, and bidding was surprisingly strong, pulling up to just shy of £800 in a matter of seconds. Clearly, this old Malaysian shitter is hot property. *BANG*. Sold.

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My head was turned rather by this S80. Private seller, black leather inside, former caravan towcar by the looks of things.

20180808_205519.jpg

On entering the ring, a punter strode briskly up holding his Styrofoam cup of tea to peer at the instruments, only for the child driving it to fling the door open right into him. Tea everywhere.

Bidding peaked at £400. Seller said no, not letting it go for that. I could have been tempted... but out it went, unsold.

20180808_203238.jpg

The star of the show then stepped forward - the Lada. Or rather, the VAZ 2104. A left-hooker from Bulgaria, and as mentioned upthread, being sold by a well-known local shiter who isn't (yet) on the beige pages. He really ought to be, he's got three of these buggers.

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Brisk bidding at first, but seemed to peter out at about the £825 mark. Lots of indecipherable gobbledegook was forthcoming from the speakers, the hammer was banged, the Lada reversed back into its former spot. We were none the wiser about whether it had sold or not. Probably not.

The Manky Midget, which seemed to be doubling up as an adventure playground for the more junior attendees, started but didn't move from its spot. I think the hammer fell at about £675 or so (please correct me if you know otherwise), and it vanished off on the back of a flatbed later, so that one probably did sell. it looked pretty crispy, but worth that in spares, for sure.

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Darkness was settling as the last of the heaps went through; various barried Peugeots on slammed springs tapping out at £200, and a multitude of BMWs in varying states of decreptitude. Given Reverend Bluejeans' graphic accounts of just how comprehensively fucked a 14 year old Beemer can be, there was a lot of bravery apparent in the ring.

20180808_210042.jpg

As the crowd started to drift away, Faker struck up a conversation with the brand-new owner of this Porsche Cayenne S; bought for £3250. I was horrified to realise that these yokes were now in their teenage years. In fairness, it looked not too bad. Six-pot calipers up front were a talking point; not sure I fancy DIYing them at present, mind. I also didn't ask why he was carrying a fuel can and spout.

I drifted over to the burger trailer to see if anything resembling a famed Cannock DETHBURGA appeared on their menu, but they'd already pulled the shutters down. Ah well. Possibly they'd received word that Environmental Health were close by.

Chuntery engines roared and baldy tyres kicked up gravel as new purchases were ragged out of the compound, and either hauled up onto various trailers and low-loaders or just disappeared off into the Antrim night, one tail light glowing. Suddenly, we three were all but alone in the gloaming.

Being still peak holiday season, it seems that the auction was only about half its usual size, both in terms of cars and buyers.

But! Plans are afoot to make this a semi-regular thing, so y'know... it really is very close to Belfast International Airport. And the Port of Larne. Just sayin', like.

Overall - GUD TIME MUCKER.

Catch you next time!

20180808_201317.jpg
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Rollcall of shite:

1980 Ford Cortina 1.6 L (1997); 1976 Mini Clubman 1.0 (1997); 1973 Vauxhall Viva HC 1.3 (1997-2005); 1984 Datsun Sunny B11 1.5 Coupé (1999-2000); 1983 Datsun Sunny B11 1.5 Coupé (2000); 1986 Ford Fiesta 1.1 Ghia (2001-2003); 1996 Ford Escort 1.6 LX (2003-2008); 1985 Toyota Corona 2.4 Avante (2005-2006); 1981 Ford Cortina 2.0 GL Estate (2008-2010); 1993 Volkswagen Polo 1.0 Genesis (2010); 1996 Citroen XM 2.5TD VSX Estate (2010-2011); 1988 Volvo 240 2.0 GL Estate (2011-2012); 2004 Alfa Romeo 156 1.9JTD Veloce (2012-2014); 1993 Volkswagen Polo 1.0 Fox (2013-2014); 1996 Renault Laguna 1.8 RN (2014 - 2018); 1997 Renault Laguna 2.0 RT Sport (2015-2017); 1998 Renault Laguna 1.8 RT Sport (2017 - 2018); 2003 Subaru Forester 2.0 XT (2018 - present)

 

822434.png 836445.png


#53 OFFLINE   Datsuncog

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Posted 09 August 2018 - 04:29 PM

So, just to get things in everyone's diary... how about another jaunt for Wednesday 5 September, same time, same place?

 

Can move a few weeks either side as needed to suit folks' schedules; it's just to have summat to aim towards.

 

I'm game - anyone else??


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#54 OFFLINE   Faker

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Posted 09 August 2018 - 05:42 PM

Sounds good. Nice blog D.C.
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#55 OFFLINE   The_Equalizer

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Posted 09 August 2018 - 08:08 PM

What a cracking write up and you've remembered far more than I did. I'm surprised the Lada didn't have the usual Sold As Seen (SAS) in the screen. Does this mean that it came with the one hour gearbox and engine warranty? 

 

I think that little MG Midget went for £475 although even £675 was a steal as the cheapest one I can find on Car and Classic is £1800. 

 

There was also a couple of cheap Binis, including a 2006 with 56K-ish miles for a whisker over £1K. 

 

There was a dearth of big engined saloons; certainly no Benzs nor Jags. 

 

The 5th September sounds jolly good to me. Perhaps Faker can bring the trailer again, but fill it this time? 


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#56 OFFLINE   Faker

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Posted 10 August 2018 - 07:28 PM

Perhaps Faker can bring the trailer again, but fill it this time!!


Would it not be better for me to bring something to ballyclare and sell it!!
reliving my youth

#57 OFFLINE   Datsuncog

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Posted 10 August 2018 - 07:55 PM

^^^ That's just crazy talk.







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