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Barefoot Fuckity, Fuckity Fuck!

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564 replies to this topic

#541 ONLINE   njgleeds

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Posted 02 April 2019 - 03:27 PM

Always had a lot of time for BV72.

Thoroughly decent chap.

Won’t hear a word said.
  • barefoot likes this
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#542 OFFLINE   barefoot

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Posted 02 April 2019 - 03:42 PM

Me either, he & I spent a very pleasant evening evening together at Shitefest Wales drinking ourselves utterly stupid together.


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#543 ONLINE   Andyrew

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Posted 02 April 2019 - 04:36 PM

How could m12s be fitted where m14s should be?
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#544 OFFLINE   HillmanImp

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Posted 02 April 2019 - 08:09 PM

Since the EPB warning light came on last week, the fair wife has been using the XJ8 for her commute & I have been pottering about in the Vel Satis.

In a curious turn of events, the EPB light has gone out today - which is good.
But the fair wife reports a complete lack of anything from the Jaguar on the way home this evening - which is not good.
No power, slowing down and waiting for lorries to pass her on the inside so that she could get to the hard shoulder.
Once there, whilst looking for her phone, the car apparently set off like a rocket!
Apparently she never took it out of drive, never tried to restart it, since the engine never apparently stopped,
And apparently never took her foot off the accelerator since it took off at speed?
I am unsure what happened here & I'm guessing that she didn't use the brakes to stop it?
Asking for more information at the moment simply results in, 'you make me drive a death trap etc.'
Any ideas folks?


When I had the car it used to sometimes just cut out when I got to the top of Hollins hill towards Guiseley. I thought it was maybe the throttle body as it was a common problem but it didn't happen enough for me to do anything about it.

Had she just driven up a big hill by chance?
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#545 OFFLINE   Bren

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Posted 02 April 2019 - 08:30 PM

Perhaps the smaller discs were fitted as the previous owner did'nt think the car would travel far enough under it's own power to need them?
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#546 OFFLINE   Jim Bell

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Posted 02 April 2019 - 08:31 PM

I don't think in all my years I've ever heard of a car with incorrect disks fitted.

Well done whatever po is responsible.
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#547 OFFLINE   jonathan_dyane

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Posted 02 April 2019 - 08:54 PM

My old XM had smaller incorrect discs fitted to the front end when I bought it. Naturally I didn’t discover this until a pad made a break for freedom...
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#548 ONLINE   chodweaver

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Posted 02 April 2019 - 11:01 PM

T'weren't me, guv.

 

Scary, scary shit. When I had it, I noticed that the wheel nuts fore and aft were different sizes, but it never occurred to me that this might be due to the wrong discs having been fitted. I just assumed French weirdness...

 

Good luck with putting the EPB issues to bed.

 

PS. Breadvan is a great bloke.


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'Ridiculing shit engineering for over half a century'

 

Vomit colour Corsa 1.4 Comfort badermatic (the one constant, reliable thing in my life /Quentin)

XM 2.1 SEDTurbo (leaky driveway ornament)

LT Multicruiser (guest bedroom and backup kitchen)

Mk1 MR2 (rumours of its health are lies)

 

In the Voyager Sanitorium:

Chrysler Graf Spee Limited 3.3 + LPG (suspected OMGHG, Driver's window failure, ABS, AC and driver's seat heater failures)

Spears and reapers Chrysler Graf Spee Limited 3.3 + LPG (suspected long term abuse by PO, passenger's window failure)

 

(I'm sure I've forgotten at least one...)


#549 OFFLINE   barefoot

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Posted 03 April 2019 - 06:44 AM

I don't think in all my years I've ever heard of a car with incorrect disks fitted.

Well done whatever pro is responsible.

 

Is a bloke called Mick at Diamond Motors in Long Eaton.


 

When I had the car it used to sometimes just cut out when I got to the top of Hollins hill towards Guiseley. I thought it was maybe the throttle body as it was a common problem but it didn't happen enough for me to do anything about it.

Had she just driven up a big hill by chance?

 

Thanks Scotty, but the throttle body was removed and cleaned when I had the cams & chains sorted, about 9,000 miles ago.


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#550 OFFLINE   barefoot

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Posted 03 April 2019 - 02:59 PM

Vel Satis now appears to be sorted, the rear discs were from a Laguna.

Chap tells me I've a noisy dual mass flywheel* and that the error codes apparently caused by the O2 sensor

are probably down to a slight leak** from the exhaust.

 

   *I knew this.

** I didn't know this


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#551 OFFLINE   barefoot

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Posted 12 April 2019 - 10:49 AM

Except it's not a barn, it's a garage, and I didn't find it, it's my garage.

 

P1140148.JPG

 

I just realised that I've never posted a picture of my Beetle on here before.


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#552 OFFLINE   Jim Bell

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Posted 12 April 2019 - 10:58 AM

That's the best colour.
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#553 OFFLINE   barefoot

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Posted 12 April 2019 - 11:14 AM

It's not Sunburst yellow, that's Texas yellow!


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#554 OFFLINE   Jim Bell

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Posted 12 April 2019 - 01:32 PM

It's not Sunburst yellow, that's Texas yellow!


Is it the original paint code? It looks lovely.

#555 OFFLINE   SiC

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Posted 12 April 2019 - 02:52 PM

Does it work?
Oldies: 1972 Austin 1100 2dr - Project Rust bucket, 1974 MGB GT - A stereotypical classic car.
Moderns: 2000 Boxster - New enough to drive sublimely but old enough to nearly feel like a classic, 2010 Aldi A4 - Owned to placate the wife on my crap buying.

#556 OFFLINE   somewhatfoolish

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Posted 12 April 2019 - 04:36 PM

How could m12s be fitted where m14s should be?

Because french.


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#557 OFFLINE   barefoot

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Posted 12 April 2019 - 05:31 PM

Is it the original paint code? It looks lovely.


It is indeed

 

Does it work?


It did when I put it in there, but that was about five years ago, so I suspect not without some attention.

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#558 OFFLINE   barefoot

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Posted 13 April 2019 - 02:30 PM

In a couple or three weeks, we're off in the Bay of lasting Joy to explore the Scottish highlands & Islands.

Today was just a quick shake down run up to the Derbyshite hills for a quick overnighter.

But the bus, struggled like a bastard on the M1, seemingly unable to rev properly, top speed was down from a heady 58 to about 50.

Came off at 29 and onto the A617, pulled over, but there were no obvious loose leads or anything so we made a run for home...

I quickly became unsettled of the lack of hard shoulder and opted to call it a day at Tibshelf services.

 

P1140150.JPG

 

It took Autoaid a dismal three hours to get anyone out to us. 

A second recovery company arrived after the first, Richford Motors failed us completely.

 

P1140152.JPG

 

A pleasant enough day was spent in the crisp spring sunshine, but the fair wife was less than impressed.

 

P1140155.JPG

 

Off now to leave a review on trusted trader... 


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#559 OFFLINE   chaseracer

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Posted 13 April 2019 - 03:34 PM

Has that recovery bloke never heard of weight distribution?  Or did he not realise there's a heavy lump up the Bay of Joy's arse?


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#560 OFFLINE   twosmoke300

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Posted 13 April 2019 - 04:36 PM

Maybe his power steering has packed up
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One of the funniest things ive read on here - RIP Dave

 

Quote

 

Brilliant... late in for lunch I fired up an off-brand pot noodle and while carrying it to the lounge successfully spilled it all over myself, burned the piss out of my hand, soaked my phone with the juice, soaked a load of expense receipts I was also carrying and it hit the hall floor and just fucking exploded....it was literally dripping from the ceiling in my newly decorated hallway. The obvious and considered reaction was to throw an immediate, massive paddy and boot the fucker down the hall while screaming, which has made the whole scenario about 18 times worse.


#561 ONLINE   Matts_Rusty_Bus

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Posted 13 April 2019 - 06:13 PM

Are you still running the standard points and condensor on this?


Sent from my SM-A520F using Tapatalk
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#562 OFFLINE   barefoot

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Posted 13 April 2019 - 06:51 PM

Are you still running the standard points and condensor on this?


Sent from my SM-A520F using Tapatalk

 

Yes, And I suspect a fucked condensor.

 

Maybe his power steering has packed up

 

Has that recovery bloke never heard of weight distribution?  Or did he not realise there's a heavy lump up the Bay of Joy's arse?

 

 

Bizarrely, the curious weight distribution made for a very smooth ride home.

I've ridden in very, very jerky recovery trucks, but I suspect that it's further back than intended,

I had to hold the brake pedal pressed down after the hand brake had repeatedly failed to hold the bus on the sloped recovery bed.


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#563 ONLINE   Matts_Rusty_Bus

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Posted 13 April 2019 - 07:03 PM

Yes, And I suspect a fucked condensor.




Bizarrely, the curious weight distribution made for a very smooth ride home.
I've ridden in very, very jerky recovery trucks, but I suspect that it's further back than intended,
I had to hold the brake pedal pressed down after the hand brake had repeatedly failed to hold the bus on the sloped recovery bed.

It does sound exactly like the symptoms mine had. The accuspark electronic dizzy is a great budget swap. Fit and forget.


Sent from my SM-A520F using Tapatalk
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#564 OFFLINE   Asimo

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Posted 13 April 2019 - 07:06 PM

I expect the Type2 Mk2 is embarassed by those alien wheeltrims........

#565 OFFLINE   barefoot

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Posted 15 April 2019 - 09:49 AM

I expect the Type2 Mk2 is embarassed by those alien wheeltrims........

 

 

As I'm sure Junkman will agree, those are the finest wheeltrims in the world, ever.


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