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Roffle

Mystery Picasso Roffle

Roffle

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606 replies to this topic

#1 OFFLINE   Bucketeer

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 03:09 PM

As the Prince Of Our Hearts Peter Andre once famously sang
Wo-o-o-o-o-o-oh-oh mysteree roffle
I wanna get close to you

Now you too can get close to a mystery roffle.
I have ended up with a car. I want to not have that car. I want to make a loss on that car.
£4 per ticket for a competently running, stopping and turning vehicle with MOT 'til next year.

For £4 you could buy some eczema cream

61On72DiUTL._SL1500_.jpg

Or a gorgeous coloured Georgette cami which is the perfect choice for your nigh-out wear collection. Wear it with a pair of denim skinny jeans and court shoes to complete your look.

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Or half a cheap Guinea Pig. Maybe.

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OR you could have the chance to win a car.

Ideal for shopping.

IMG_20180429_134539128.jpg

Fits in car parks. Just not this one.

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It could be here (it's not).

IMG_20180429_131338116_HDR.jpg

It's easy to park. Just not here.

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It has an inside you can look out of. Just not this one.

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It'll get to any corner of these isles effortlessly. It's got a heart of gold.
Win it. Cherish it. Bridge it. Use it. Bury it. Live in it. Whatever.
Hell, worst comes to the worst, if you win it and don't want it I can bridge it and send you the money. But why would you want to kill a car you heartless bastard,


Anyway, the mystery starts here. Good luck.

bernard-and-ellsworth.jpg
  • wuvvum, Talbot, The Moog and 21 others like this

#2 OFFLINE   Bucketeer

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 03:10 PM

FULLY UP TO DATE LIST NOW ON PAGE NINE

 

1  Bucketeer (?)

2 Fat_Pirate

3  clayts450

4  Stanky

5  panhard65

6  spartacus

7  bramz7

8  Stanky

9  Cavcraft

10 Simonsays

11 Fat_Pirate

12 red5

13 The Moog

14 Dick Longbridge

15 The Moog

16 Stanky

17 Simonsays

18 sherpamog

19 sporty-shite

20 Talbot

21 petermcpete

22 dean36014

23 red5

24 83C

25 Talbot

26 spartacus

27 17-Coffees

28 gadgetgricey

29 blakey79

30 Jams

31 barmatt

32 Stanky

33 panhard65

34 Cavcraft

35 SRi05

36 barefoot

37 sporty-shite

38 Phil_lihp

39 The Moog

40 SRi05

41 dollywobbler

42 Simonsays

43 clayts450

44 Cavcraft

45 Cavcraft

46 wilsonwilson

47 beko1987

48 83C

49 Bucketeer(?)

50 njgleeds

51 chodweaver

52 dome

53 Cavcraft

54 barmatt

55Tam

56 njgleeds

57wilsonwilson

58 blakey79

59 dollywobbler



#3 OFFLINE   Simonsays

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    Rank: Austin Maxi

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 03:22 PM

I'm in.

Three of your finest random numbers please
  • Junkman likes this
Mk1 Ford Escort WFR921K
Rover 2200SC UUP473R
Seat Marbella
Nissan Micra K11
Nissan Micra K11
Skoda Felicia 1.3
Skoda Felicia 1.3 Estate
Fiat Stilo
Nissan Almera
Nissan Qashqai
Suzuki Alto (juniors first car)
Ford Streetka
All gone but not forgotten.

Nissan Note Cdi (commuting trolley)
Renault clio (Juniors current car)
Volvo V40

#4 OFFLINE   sporty-shite

sporty-shite

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 03:24 PM

This is absolutely irresistible. Two randoms please.
  • Junkman and chodweaver like this

 some potato headed fanny faced shitberg of a cunt in a silver hatchback

 

#5 ONLINE   bramz7

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 03:26 PM

Yeah definitely. Give me number 7 please
  • Junkman likes this

#6 OFFLINE   Fat_Pirate

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 03:27 PM

2 randoms please.  If it's a diesel I'm bridging the bastard though.


  • Junkman likes this

2003 Mini Cooper ("shit")

2003 Berlingo Multispace 

2002 CLK230 convertible

1991 MX5 


#7 OFFLINE   Jams

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 03:34 PM

Go on then a ransom please
  • Junkman likes this

#8 OFFLINE   Simonsays

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 03:34 PM

Ummm.... Forgot to ask, where is it located?
  • Junkman likes this
Mk1 Ford Escort WFR921K
Rover 2200SC UUP473R
Seat Marbella
Nissan Micra K11
Nissan Micra K11
Skoda Felicia 1.3
Skoda Felicia 1.3 Estate
Fiat Stilo
Nissan Almera
Nissan Qashqai
Suzuki Alto (juniors first car)
Ford Streetka
All gone but not forgotten.

Nissan Note Cdi (commuting trolley)
Renault clio (Juniors current car)
Volvo V40

#9 OFFLINE   spartacus

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 03:35 PM

Ace, how can I refuse, 26 and 6 please.
  • Junkman likes this

#10 OFFLINE   blakey79

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 03:36 PM

2 randoms
  • Junkman likes this

#11 OFFLINE   gadgetgricey

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 03:39 PM

#28 if you would please

 

Ummm.... Forgot to ask, where is it located?

 

I think he's near Guildford. GU16 posted on the Saab thread.


Current fleet

 

75 CDT Auto Tourer

ZT-T Diesel Manual

LPG 4.0 Jeep Grand Cherokee WJ

Saab 9-3 Convertible 

Mazda RX8

Freelander V6

Focus 1.6 Auto

 


#12 OFFLINE   chodweaver

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 03:41 PM

I'm currently unemployed, with little in the way of prospects, convalescing from an operation which renders me physically useless for at least a month and being supported by my wife and her work as a driving instructor. I have five vehicles, of which two have an MOT but only one is usable. None of them will sell easily or turn a profit if they did.

Of course I'll have a random.
  • garethj, sporty-shite, eddyramrod and 6 others like this

Vomit colour Corsa 1.4 Comfort badermatic (the one constant, reliable thing in my life /Quentin)

XM 2.1 SEDTurbo (leaky driveway ornament)

Chrysler Graf Spee Limited 3.3 + LPG (suspected OMGHG, ABS, AC and driver's seat heater failures)

LT Multicruiser (guest bedroom and backup kitchen)

Mk1 MR2 (rumours of its health are lies)

 

(I'm sure I've forgotten at least one...)


#13 OFFLINE   Cavcraft

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 03:42 PM

44, 45, 53 and two randoms, please, sir.


  • Junkman likes this
"As for actually admitting to liking Corsas on a public forum: you're a bollock-brained, biscuit-eating, faux-northern, bastardy, bollocky, wank-brain"

#14 OFFLINE   The Moog

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 03:44 PM

Three for me and two tickets for that bucketeer fella I have heard he likes cars.

(If he doesn't want them then I think he can find an inventive way to pass the luck* on)
  • Junkman, Datsuncog, Cavcraft and 1 other like this
1999 - 406 2.0 hdi 90
1991 - Eunos Track beast
2003 - Getz

#15 OFFLINE   clayts450

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 03:51 PM

Two randoms please, Alex.

 

Eleventy billion randoms if it's a Rover/MG.


  • Junkman likes this

Current

2001 Rover 45 V6 Connie; 2003 Chrysler PT Cruiser Limited CRD2004 Rover Streetwise S

 

Historical choddage 1986-1998 (stopped driving 1999-2016)
1969 VW Beetle 1300;  1977 Morris Marina 1.3 Super; 1983 Skoda Estelle 120L; Rover Metro; Vauxhall CorsaVauxhall Cavalier 


#16 ONLINE   Junkman

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 03:57 PM

Can this be whacked on classic insurance?

If not. it's a pass for me.


1967 Renault 16 GL................................................now with porous sills

1979 Mobylette AV89.............................................................running

1992 Mercedes-Benz 230E.....................too bloody sensible, whatever that is
1997 Peugeot 405 2.0 Executive Estate..................now with aircon and brakes


#17 OFFLINE   83C

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 04:06 PM

I’m tempted to pick numbers but I feel this would be against the spirit of mystery surrounding this fine* machine. Therefore two radnoms please!
  • 1984 Leyland Tiger - big, slow. Much like the owner.
  • 1990 Land Rover 90 - awaiting regeneration.
  • 1999 Range Rover P38 4.6 - Incontinent wallowy old thing.
  • 2004 Mercedes Sprinter - shagging wagon. 
  • 2005 BMW 525d - boring modern.
  • 2006 Triumph Sprint ST 1050 - small, fast. Not like the owner.

#18 OFFLINE   red5

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 04:10 PM

23 and 12 please.

1995 2.8 Fronterror LWB

2002 GSX-R 1000

Jago 

 

Living the dream.

 

 

 


#19 ONLINE   panhard65

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 04:13 PM

Go on then 2 randoms please I am down to only 4 cars which really isn't enough.


'69 Seat 1500 hearse

'77 Renault 7

'99 Peugeot 806 (with slightly less dents)

'08 Peugeot 207 van (with many dents)

 


#20 OFFLINE   yes oui si

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 04:15 PM

Five randoms ????
  • yes oui si likes this

ebehyh.png
Top grammar tips!

Bought = purchased. Brought = relocated
Lose = misplace/opposite of win. Loose = your mum


#21 OFFLINE   Stanky

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 04:16 PM

I'll take 4, 8, 16 and 32 please


  • Slartibartfast likes this

2003 Toyota Yaris

2004 SAAB 9-3

1998 Toyota Celica ST

 

1996 Nissan Almera GX (departed)

198? Jago Geep (Now resideing chez red5)

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#22 OFFLINE   Bucketeer

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 04:21 PM

I'll update the list shortly.
Yes, I'm in GU16 but can always help with delivery/collection/disposal.
No, it won't go on a classic policy.

Also it has a manual gearbox, but that's all you're getting out of me. Loose ships sink roffles or summat.

Also also, the winner will have the choice of discovering the cars identity immediately after the draw, or to drag out the suspense further in some masochistic fashion or other.
  • purplebargeken, Junkman, Aston Martin and 2 others like this

#23 ONLINE   dean36014

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 04:23 PM

Go on if there's any left I'll have a single lucky dip please

1987 Citroen BX 17RD

1991 Citroen BX TGD

2004 Citroen Xsara Enterprise

1996 Citroen XM 2.0i 16v auto.


#24 OFFLINE   jamiewilson

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 04:27 PM

Presume a lift from the local station is ok? Like I’m going to win and inconvenience myself like that!

One random please

#25 OFFLINE   clayts450

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 04:36 PM

 

 

drag out the suspense further in some masochistic fashion or other.

 

This please


Current

2001 Rover 45 V6 Connie; 2003 Chrysler PT Cruiser Limited CRD2004 Rover Streetwise S

 

Historical choddage 1986-1998 (stopped driving 1999-2016)
1969 VW Beetle 1300;  1977 Morris Marina 1.3 Super; 1983 Skoda Estelle 120L; Rover Metro; Vauxhall CorsaVauxhall Cavalier 


#26 OFFLINE   Dick Longbridge

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 04:51 PM

Number 14 please. If it’s already gone, randinium alternative would be proper.
Please don’t click on my profile face. Thanks.

#27 ONLINE   SherpaMog

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 04:55 PM

16 and 18 please

#28 OFFLINE   Talbot

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 04:59 PM

I need another car like I need a hole in the head, but it's reasonably close to me, so I kina have to.
If I win this, it'll either get instantly re-roffled, or the Xantia will get instantly roffled.

2 randomz please. Lowish numbers if poss please.
Current fleet:  Mercedes.  Xantia.  Berlingo.  Discovery.  Forward Control.  Nova. Historic shite.

#29 ONLINE   dollywobbler

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 05:19 PM

Random me up one time. No, make that two times. Cheers.


  • Cavcraft likes this

1972 Invacar Model 70, 1984 Reliant Fox

1986 Citroen 2CV6, 1990 Dacia 1310

1999 Daewoo Matiz, 2000 Rover 45 V6, 2001 Perodua Nippa
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#30 ONLINE   beko1987

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Posted 29 April 2018 - 05:20 PM

One random please!
2001 Gooner2 Ph1 1.9Dci Expression (His)
2008 orl Vauxhalls r Shit Zafira 1.8 SRI 140 (Hers)





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