Simonsays Posted April 20, 2018 Share Posted April 20, 2018 I'm responsible for the care of three vehicles. A modern, an 'inbetweener' and a shiter. I have all the documents/handbooks/owners packs/purchase details. I have all the receipts for work done with records of dates and mileages. I know when the mot's are due and when they require servicing. I have records of *every* drop of fuel they've had in my ownership. What brand it was and what mpg was achieved. I own car cleaning products, interior and exterior. And I use them. I have turned into a giffer. Shit. myglaren, robinmasters, Magnificent Rustbucket and 25 others 28 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mally Posted April 20, 2018 Share Posted April 20, 2018 I'm a giffer, I own 2 of your 3 types of vehicles.Other than that I do not conform to any of your other OCD symptoms. stonedagain 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tooSavvy Posted April 20, 2018 Share Posted April 20, 2018 I am TheSavv Mr Bump, Slartibartfast, Mr Lobster and 5 others 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mally Posted April 20, 2018 Share Posted April 20, 2018 I am TheSavv No explanation needed or possible. UltraWomble, Squire_Dawson, chaseracer and 9 others 12 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
timolloyd Posted April 20, 2018 Share Posted April 20, 2018 But do you buy trinkets for all 3 cars? Additional reflectors, lights, gadgets and mirrors? Only then can you ascend to true gifferdom. smellypoo, Junkman, Datsuncog and 3 others 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chodweaver Posted April 20, 2018 Share Posted April 20, 2018 I thought gifferdom conferred a diminishing spatial awareness and the accompanying minor panel and bumper damage? It sounds more like you are simply the ideal PO of a vehicle. Selling any of 'em? /innocent enquiry Junkman, Dick Longbridge and Magnificent Rustbucket 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simonsays Posted April 20, 2018 Author Share Posted April 20, 2018 But do you buy trinkets for all 3 cars? Additional reflectors, lights, gadgets and mirrors? Only then can you ascend to true gifferdom.I'm quite partial to those rubber strips that you fit to the edges of doors to prevent damage and they have orange reflectors built in... Magnificent Rustbucket, mercrocker, timolloyd and 5 others 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simonsays Posted April 20, 2018 Author Share Posted April 20, 2018 I thought gifferdom conferred a diminishing spatial awareness and the accompanying minor panel and bumper damage? It sounds more like you are simply the ideal PO of a vehicle.Selling any of 'em?/innocent enquirySome of the bumpers show signs of a lapse in good judgement on attempting some manouvers. The streetkak is the only vehicle that had an uncertain future. I'll be keeping it for the summer months and then moving it on if it passes its MOT cheaply or scrapping it if it looks expensive. I have a hankering for a barge on my driveway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zantimisfit Posted April 20, 2018 Share Posted April 20, 2018 I don't have all of these traits, but I have found myself watching 'A Place in the Country' Different symptoms....same thing. I_am_Diesel 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scaryoldcortina Posted April 20, 2018 Share Posted April 20, 2018 I keep finding vehicles I'd forgotten I owned. Not sure if that's a memory/age problem or not. HillmanImp, stephen01, chaseracer and 1 other 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Uncle Jimmy Posted April 20, 2018 Share Posted April 20, 2018 String back driving gloves and a brolly or Panama hat on the parcel shelf required for gifferdom, sorry, try harder! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jim Bell Posted April 20, 2018 Share Posted April 20, 2018 I'm responsible for the care of three vehicles. A modern, an 'inbetweener' and a shiter. I have all the documents/handbooks/owners packs/purchase details. I have all the receipts for work done with records of dates and mileages. I know when the mot's are due and when they require servicing. I have records of *every* drop of fuel they've had in my ownership. What brand it was and what mpg was achieved. I own car cleaning products, interior and exterior. And I use them. I have turned into a giffer. Shit. Im glad that people like you exist and I greatly enjoy purchasing vehicles from gentlemen such as yourself. Keep up the good work. chodweaver, smellypoo, Junkman and 6 others 9 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chodweaver Posted April 20, 2018 Share Posted April 20, 2018 "I have a hankering for a barge on my driveway" You, Sir, are not alone in this regard davocano, purplebargeken and Magnificent Rustbucket 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Junkman Posted April 20, 2018 Share Posted April 20, 2018 I'm responsible for the care of three vehicles. A modern, an 'inbetweener' and a shiter. I have all the documents/handbooks/owners packs/purchase details. I have all the receipts for work done with records of dates and mileages. I know when the mot's are due and when they require servicing. I have records of *every* drop of fuel they've had in my ownership. What brand it was and what mpg was achieved. I own car cleaning products, interior and exterior. And I use them. I have turned into a giffer. Shit. Is this treatable on the NHS? Lacquer Peel 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vaughant Posted April 20, 2018 Share Posted April 20, 2018 A modern giffer mod seems to be reversing/parking sensors fitted by not drilling the bumpers and sticking them to the outside with the cables running through visibly to the boot??? Or as one giffer did to me the other day, actually stop his vehicle, take his seat belt off, remove his DIGITAL CAMERA from his inside pocket, wait half an hour for it to switch on then take a picture of me all because he effectively couldn't drive so I overtook him (on a two lane road) then stopped at the lights. I thought I was having a heart attack from laughing so much which only seemed to inflame the situation? D Spares & Tyres, Lacquer Peel and somewhatfoolish 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
martc Posted April 20, 2018 Share Posted April 20, 2018 String back driving gloves and a brolly or Panama hat on the parcel shelf required for gifferdom, sorry, try harder! And a box of tissues. If these are in an embroidered cover it show's that 'er indoors/the little woman/ball and chain (other giffer 'terms of affection' are available) has joined you in the inevitable spiral to the grave. It also show that you have been trained for long enough not to complain. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
timolloyd Posted April 20, 2018 Share Posted April 20, 2018 Shonkily fitted reverse cameras are a giffer tell-tale sign too Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simonsays Posted April 20, 2018 Author Share Posted April 20, 2018 String back driving gloves and a brolly or Panama hat on the parcel shelf required for gifferdom, sorry, try harder!Brolly. Yup Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Simonsays Posted April 20, 2018 Author Share Posted April 20, 2018 And a box of tissues. If these are in an embroidered cover it show's that 'er indoors/the little woman/ball and chain (other giffer 'terms of affection' are available) has joined you in the inevitable spiral to the grave. It also show that you have been trained for long enough not to complain.Box of tissues. Yup Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
castros_bro Posted April 20, 2018 Share Posted April 20, 2018 Your problem is having a concern about it, dents - scratches - non matching tyres - a few grow bags on the back seat - I just got the sack so am doing panic job interviews but this is what I rememberererer a shonky Ford parked next to my veggie renner which has a grow bag on the back seat. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Datsuncog Posted April 20, 2018 Share Posted April 20, 2018 I keep finding vehicles I'd forgotten I owned. Not sure if that's a memory/age problem or not. Isn't that what signatures on here are for? barefoot, tooSavvy, pshome and 1 other 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JeeExEll Posted April 20, 2018 Share Posted April 20, 2018 Fortunately there are many categories of giffer. Joloke 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Junkman Posted April 20, 2018 Share Posted April 20, 2018 I just got the sack Ah fucksake. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MorrisItalSLX Posted April 20, 2018 Share Posted April 20, 2018 Do any of your cars wear an AA badge or sticker? (Or both for double points) Do you keep an umbrella in the door pocket "just in case"? (Or more than one for double points) Is there ever a hat left on your parcel shelf extended period of time? (Flat cap for double points) If you scored 3 or more points, then you are a giffer. (I scored 4) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stripped fred Posted April 20, 2018 Share Posted April 20, 2018 1. Don't forget to apply full revs but slip the clutch so you proceed forwards at 1.7mph while sounding like you are at Santa Pod, and severely limiting clutch life. 2. Please drive everywhere at the same speed, about 39mph should do it, whether it be a 30mph or 60mph limit. 3. Please brake for no apparent reason. puddlethumper, chodweaver and mat_the_cat 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scaryoldcortina Posted April 20, 2018 Share Posted April 20, 2018 Isn't that what signatures on here are for? Nah, I keep sigs turned off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RayMK Posted April 20, 2018 Share Posted April 20, 2018 I'm old enough to qualify (68) but the only noticeable traces of gifferdom in my vehicles are the large scale mapbook in each. No brollies, hats or gloves, although the two older cars have enough tools on board to rebuild the engine despite my AA membership (no badge!). I generally match my driving speed to that of other road users except in 30 & 40mph speed limits where I become a major irritation to the stereotypical Mr Audi by not exceeding the limit. chodweaver, GrumpiusMaximus and mat_the_cat 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GrumpiusMaximus Posted April 20, 2018 Share Posted April 20, 2018 29. Drive an estate. Has scraped corners. Has large-scale map. English Heritage sticker. AA membership. Full glovebox. Low mileage for its age. Observe speed limits. I'm a giffer. It was my grandmother's car but apart from the 100 OS maps that used to live in every conceivable storage area, it's the same... RayMK and mercrocker 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RayMK Posted April 20, 2018 Share Posted April 20, 2018 29. Drive an estate. Has scraped corners. Has large-scale map. English Heritage sticker. AA membership. Full glovebox. Low mileage for its age. Observe speed limits. I'm a giffer. It was my grandmother's car but apart from the 100 OS maps that used to live in every conceivable storage area, it's the same... I love Ordnance Survey Maps but suspect that navigating using them whilst on the move could be hazardous . spike60 and GrumpiusMaximus 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GrumpiusMaximus Posted April 20, 2018 Share Posted April 20, 2018 I love Ordnance Survey Maps but suspect that navigating using them whilst on the move could be hazardous . The irony? My Grandad is blind. They can't have used the maps whilst driving much... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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