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My delightfully shambolic BMW 320i - Plodding along uneventfully

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336 replies to this topic

#31 OFFLINE   Tayne

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Posted 22 January 2018 - 12:41 PM

I think battery and battery terminal security may be included in the Mot...
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It always amuses me that e46s vie with the PT Cruiser as the car that's too shit for Autoshite, 

 

 


#32 OFFLINE   Supernaut

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Posted 22 January 2018 - 12:51 PM

I think battery and battery terminal security may be included in the Mot...

 

*quietly adds to list*

 

I knew I forgot something!


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#33 OFFLINE   17-Coffees

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Posted 22 January 2018 - 10:57 PM

Since it's been dumped on my drive I though I'd tinker about with it and see if i could get the bonnet open.

First port of call was getting something to kneel on, cardbord box I grabbed...

27152483_10155940628931132_1911926398_n.jpg

ITS A SIGN!

 

So I set about removing some interior trim to so I could remove the latch for the bonnet pull.As expected it came off easy* as always, and i managed to cut myself on the speaker panel. Then I removed the bonnet pull latch...

27044995_10155940666401132_892465953_n.jpg

Photo is once I put it back togeather.

Pulled it all the way and nothing, can hear something moving when you pull and push it. It's as if its very slack, would't say its broke as can hear something at the bonnet side of things. Since it was 8Pm and i'm on Holiday, I got board and went back inside to crack open a beer. 

 

Things of note I told Supernaut was that the front headlights are really condensated, which could lead to an MOT fail. We did have a truck at work fail on that once. Hopefully once the bonnets open we can see whats caused it, and sort it. if not I'm sure a set off a E36 Saloon would do the job for the MOT....especially ones of a 316 that's sitting hibernating in a garage.

I did try and acquire a battery terminal tonight as well, but sadly my free supply was out of stock, oh well. Only a few quid after all. 

Also the rear number plate has let in water, causing a big amount of bubbling should be fine as none of the letting if effected but guess it depends how anal the tester is. 

27044730_10155941037021132_1356835955_n.jpg

 

I may try again tomorrow, been told you can get to the bonnet cable by removing the O/S indicator lamp which you can remove without opening the bonnet? 


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"I did a 1000 round trip to drink & help push cars out of a muddy field, 10/10 would do again!" 

-Summery of Shitefest 2016. 

 

The Fleet:

- 'Minor Project' - 1957 Morris Minor 1000

 

The HMS LexBarge, 2000 Lexus LS400. 

 

'Shed IV', 1995 BMW 316i. (Co-owned with Supernaut)

 

 

Other's not on here:

- 2015 Abarth 595

 

 


#34 OFFLINE   Tayne

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Posted 22 January 2018 - 11:10 PM

E36 saloon lights are different to coupe lamps.


This is the video I found



It gives the impression that the bonnet release is in the driver's side on a left hand drive car, hence it might be a the offside you need to take off.

It always amuses me that e46s vie with the PT Cruiser as the car that's too shit for Autoshite, 

 

 


#35 OFFLINE   cort1977

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Posted 22 January 2018 - 11:19 PM

At least it didn't force you to listen to NECR! I used to do the breakfast show on original. Great wee station.


Never Ending Crap Records! I must be One of very few people in the world to miss Aberdeen.

Love the e36 coupe, had a Boston green 325 for a while but manual and lowered do not a good commuter make.

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#36 OFFLINE   dollywobbler

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Posted 23 January 2018 - 08:34 AM

E36 saloon lights are different to coupe lamps.


This is the video I found

https://youtu.be/-w_iZIIq1xE

It gives the impression that the bonnet release is in the driver's side on a left hand drive car, hence it might be a the offside you need to take off.


If they're anything like French cars, they will have decided that they can't be arsed to move it for RHD...

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#37 OFFLINE   320touring

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Posted 23 January 2018 - 08:50 AM

The bonnet release cable goes from lever in drivers footwells, down inside of drivers front wing and into the RHS bonnet catch. There's then a Bowden cable between right and left bonnet catches.

We have previously had success going in via the grille (the kidneys just pull out)
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#38 OFFLINE   Supernaut

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Posted 23 January 2018 - 10:31 AM

E36 saloon lights are different to coupe lamps.
 

 

Even the headlights? SRSLY?!

 

 

However, I have suggested that when I go round on Saturday we can take the lights out and put them on a radiator overnight to dry them out. It might help temporarily.

 

You've now seen where Mr Coffees' house is Tayne, so feel free to join in on Sunday, we'll probably be there most of the day.



#39 OFFLINE   320touring

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Posted 23 January 2018 - 10:56 AM

Even the headlights? SRSLY?!


However, I have suggested that when I go round on Saturday we can take the lights out and put them on a radiator overnight to dry them out. It might help temporarily.

You've now seen where Mr Coffees' house is Tayne, so feel free to join in on Sunday, we'll probably be there most of the day.


Course the headlights are different, as wings and bonnet are too!

Gone is the sense they had with the E30..
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#40 OFFLINE   Tayne

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Posted 23 January 2018 - 01:15 PM

I didn’t realise the grilles pull out from the front, they’re two piece on the e46 and need the bonnet to be open.

Sadly i’ll be at work on Sunday but i’ll swing in by in my way home.

It always amuses me that e46s vie with the PT Cruiser as the car that's too shit for Autoshite, 

 

 


#41 OFFLINE   Tayne

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Posted 23 January 2018 - 01:21 PM

Do you still have a document with the chassis number on it?

There’s a parking ticket wedged into the bottom of the screen and we can’t get to the plate under the bonnet.

It always amuses me that e46s vie with the PT Cruiser as the car that's too shit for Autoshite, 

 

 


#42 OFFLINE   Heritage motor centre

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Posted 23 January 2018 - 01:41 PM

Looking good, always liked the styling on these. Do they have that window lift thing going on when you close the doors?
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#43 OFFLINE   Tayne

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Posted 23 January 2018 - 03:36 PM

The passenger side does, driver’s side door has no power.
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It always amuses me that e46s vie with the PT Cruiser as the car that's too shit for Autoshite, 

 

 


#44 OFFLINE   Bucketeer

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Posted 23 January 2018 - 08:05 PM

I'll write my plan of action down here, for you all to track how wrong it all goes.

1: Sort out the bonnet release. Tayne has found youtube tutorials on how to do this.
2: Once the bonnet is open, investigate the screenwash. Hopefully it's just empty.
3: Have a look at the brake judder. I'm being optimistic and hoping it's a sticky caliper which can be freed off with hammers and copper grease
4: Battery terminal (thanks to Tayne for reminding me)
5: Clean it
6: Present it for an MOT!


You forgot . . .
7: Knockhill
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#45 OFFLINE   Supernaut

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Posted 23 January 2018 - 10:38 PM

Hmm, take another wholly unsuitable car round Knockhill? Tempting.

At least it might handle slightly better than an LS400.

#46 OFFLINE   Vince70

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Posted 25 January 2018 - 10:50 AM

Talking of E36 headlights even the glass is different on certain models which I found out when I got a stonechip on the headlight glass of my compact.
The saloons and coupe and cabriolet have lines going through the glass whereas the compact has clear lenses.
And the Americans have plastic covers rather than glass apparently on their E36 headlamps

#47 OFFLINE   Supernaut

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Posted 25 January 2018 - 12:00 PM

I shall take inspiration from Moog's work on his Puma, and remove the light units (and bulbs) and air them out on a radiator overnight then.

 

The plan for the weekend is for me to visit 17-Coffees' house on Saturday afternoon, we work on the car for a bit, then go to the pub. I stay in his spare room, then we continue working on the car on Sunday.

 

 

This is assuming we can get the bastard bonnet open first!


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#48 OFFLINE   mrbenn

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Posted 25 January 2018 - 12:05 PM

That's a bloody nice birthday present!


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#49 OFFLINE   Supernaut

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Posted 25 January 2018 - 05:39 PM

IMG_20180125_172815643.jpg

6NIC9hv.jpg
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#50 OFFLINE   17-Coffees

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Posted 25 January 2018 - 06:07 PM

we go to the pub then work on the car for bit 


Fixed the plan for Saturday for you...

WCPGW?
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------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"I did a 1000 round trip to drink & help push cars out of a muddy field, 10/10 would do again!" 

-Summery of Shitefest 2016. 

 

The Fleet:

- 'Minor Project' - 1957 Morris Minor 1000

 

The HMS LexBarge, 2000 Lexus LS400. 

 

'Shed IV', 1995 BMW 316i. (Co-owned with Supernaut)

 

 

Other's not on here:

- 2015 Abarth 595

 

 


#51 OFFLINE   Supernaut

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Posted 25 January 2018 - 06:10 PM

Well, can't make it any worse.

#52 OFFLINE   Supernaut

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Posted 27 January 2018 - 05:46 PM

Got the bonnet open and filled the bone dry screenwash bottle. It now works! There's a leak from the passenger side one, looks like the insulation under the bonnet needs to come out, can do that in the daylight.
Also tightened the battery clamp with a socket and it seems fine!
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#53 OFFLINE   320touring

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Posted 27 January 2018 - 05:55 PM

Good news!
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#54 OFFLINE   17-Coffees

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Posted 28 January 2018 - 08:07 AM

As Supernaut said, made a little bit of progress last night. Surprised at how clean it looks under the bonnet! Spotted a few things that will need seen to in the long run, aux belt, etc but Ifine for now.

We also removed the O/S headlight to investigate for a cause of the condensation. A quick look and it seems okay. The glass section has been siliconed in place in the past it seems, that or BMW duble secure the glass with silicon and the small clips? Got the lamp unit sitting on top of my kitchen radiator to dry out anyway.

E8D25D1C-A11F-4D57-8E99-54B22D06D180.jpeg
That was it’s state as if 6pm last night, abandoned plans for more as was time for the pub.
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------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"I did a 1000 round trip to drink & help push cars out of a muddy field, 10/10 would do again!" 

-Summery of Shitefest 2016. 

 

The Fleet:

- 'Minor Project' - 1957 Morris Minor 1000

 

The HMS LexBarge, 2000 Lexus LS400. 

 

'Shed IV', 1995 BMW 316i. (Co-owned with Supernaut)

 

 

Other's not on here:

- 2015 Abarth 595

 

 


#55 OFFLINE   Tayne

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Posted 28 January 2018 - 09:03 AM

Did you find any more cutlery under the bonnet?
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It always amuses me that e46s vie with the PT Cruiser as the car that's too shit for Autoshite, 

 

 


#56 OFFLINE   The Reverend Bluejeans

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Posted 28 January 2018 - 11:39 AM

Course the headlights are different, as wings and bonnet are too!

 

 

Not so.

 

Headlights are the same on all E36's except the Compact - these fit but have E39 style bulbs and bulb connectors.

 

Some have lines across, some have 'bobbles' along the edge depending on when it was made. Changed around 1994 iirc with all cars getting the 'bobbled' lights by 1996. Compact lenses don't fit saloon/Coupe/Convertible/Touring light units, different number of clips.

 

With E36 bonnet catches, don't fart about but go to BMW and buy two new ones and a centre cable. It will all be fucked by now. The centre cable sticks with rust and the ferrules on the catches will be broken off. You may be able to save it all but after 23 years? The catches are about 18 quid each with VAT, the cable £20.

 

I replaced it all on my Touring, cost about £43 all in and the bonnet opens and closes like a gem.

 

With the bonnet open you can remove that upper trim panel, undo the three torx screws per catch and

 

a ) Spend ages removing the complete front panel

 

b ) Just bend the front panel tabs up and slide the old catches out. I recommend this on an old shitter.


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MASTER RACE MOTORS.

 

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#57 OFFLINE   320touring

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Posted 28 January 2018 - 11:55 AM

You learn summat(lights!) Every day.

Are the indicators different ?
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#58 OFFLINE   The Reverend Bluejeans

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Posted 28 January 2018 - 01:17 PM


Are the indicators different ?

 

 

 

Yes.

 

Front grille panel is the same on all cars, just different from 1996 facelift.


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MASTER RACE MOTORS.

 

1989 F  730i. Prestigious.

1994 M 318Ti - Track whore

1998 S 323iA Touring. More shit.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

​We apologise for the continued delay. Your call is still held in a queue. Please have your reference number ready for the advisor. Your call will be answered as soon as possible.

 

 


#59 OFFLINE   Supernaut

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Posted 28 January 2018 - 05:09 PM

Progress!

As mentioned, we took out the O/S headlight and put it on a radiator overnight.

IMG_20180128_112600712.jpg


After that, we took the N/S light out for the radiator treatment and set to looking at the passenger side screenwash nozzle.

IMG_20180128_115733527.jpg

It seemed to be leaking from under it. We sort of fixed it, but it's still pretty piss poor. Might just swap the one off the white 316 onto it when presenting it for an MOT.

Then we washed it.

IMG_20180128_122906875.jpg

IMG_20180128_125303786.jpg

IMG_20180128_125317550.jpg

The grille panels are in the boot. It makes it easier to open the bonnet that way. We can just reach in with some pliers and activate the bonnet catches this way.

I then decided to fit a radio that was last used in a Peugeot 306 I owned in 2010. It still works! Cassette deck hidden behind the flip-down panel! Ooooh yeah! Shoved a cassette adapter in there and blasted some Eurobeat from 17-Coffee's phone.

IMG_20180128_150219127.jpg

check out the beading!

IMG_20180128_152708186.jpg

IMG_20180128_153434043.jpg


It goes alright, actually. Earlier today I pulled out of a junction to join the Ellon bypass rather enthusiastically and there was some gravel on the road. This resulted in some nice sideways action. :D


The headlights have already misted back up again though. Boo!

Still need to investigate the brake judder and the electrics in the driver's door.




Did you find any more cutlery under the bonnet?


Alas, no.
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#60 OFFLINE   Supernaut

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Posted 29 January 2018 - 10:56 AM

I've been doing some pondering this morning.

 

The brake judder still needs investigated, and from how it feels through the steering, I want to look at the front left as my first area of investigation.

 

 

 

However, the bonnet not being easy to open may cause problems at an MOT. What do our tame MOT testers think about this? I was wondering if I could reach in through the grille with pliers to release the two bonnet catches in the car park outside the MOT station, and present it to them just on the secondary catch. Would this be a fail? Or would it be fine as they would open the bonnet to check the fluids, then slam it shut and it would then securely stay shut. Hmm.







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