Stanky Posted November 25, 2017 Share Posted November 25, 2017 To supplement the secret santa this year we've decided to have a bit of amusement in the form of an AS parody of the 12 days of christmas song. From the 27th November to the 8th December inclusive we invite a line a day from members via PM to the dedicated (temporary) mod account 12days. Points will be awarded for the lines we find the most amusing and the 3 members with the most points on the 9th December will win mystery prizes! I know that the proper 12 days of christmas don't start until the 25th December, but if we do it earlier then there is a chance that the prizes will make it to the winners by the 25th. As a starter, here are some ideas "On the fifth day of christshitemas, the MOT man gave wept to me Five gol-den rimsFour flat tyresThree bent valvesTwo warning lightsAnd a camchain ratting freeeeeee!" and repeat... points awarded by the admin team 3 points for best submission2 points for runner up1 point for next best We will post up a daily top 5 entries, but not who they were submitted by. on the 9th we will tot up the points and the members with the most points will be announced. We'll also compile a full run-through of the song with the best lyrics from the assembled multitudes. All entries via PM to mod 12days. One line each day please. mercrocker, LabRat, tooSavvy and 6 others 9 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Reverend Bluejeans Posted November 26, 2017 Share Posted November 26, 2017 ...and a fail sheet as long as Nicholas Lyndhurst's faaace. dome and mercrocker 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Moog Posted November 27, 2017 Share Posted November 27, 2017 On the first day of Christmas my ..... Entries sent to 12days Christmas account. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Moog Posted November 27, 2017 Share Posted November 27, 2017 Day one entries in no particular order:My true love shite-friend sent to me a matte black Austin Maaaxiiiiiii On the first day of shitemas Red Robbo sent to me,...A Corsa with a bent MoT On the first day of shitemas my Laguna gave to me....A world of total mi-se-ry!Some got carried away and rushed ahead:On the sixths day of xmas, my Tagora failed on meSix french cylindersFive working fineFour floats to checkThree barrels a sideTwo screws eachAnd the linkage needs adjustment too...on the 2nd day of Christmas, Dollywobbler sent to me- 2 Invacars and a 2cv in a garageRemember you can enter any day. There are three top prizes to win for those with the best points total. spike60 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stanky Posted November 29, 2017 Author Share Posted November 29, 2017 Day two entries - best of: On the second day of shitemas my shitheaps gave to me, Two-oo turbos blown... On the second day of shitemas my Series Landy proved to be... several chequer plates and a plate-raped coil chassis On the second day of shitemas Red Robbo gave to me.... two Savvy The Moog 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sudsprint Posted November 29, 2017 Share Posted November 29, 2017 Ford ThunderbirdsThree Y10sTwo Triumph DovesAnd a Hartge engined Beemer M3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stanky Posted November 30, 2017 Author Share Posted November 30, 2017 Picks of day 3 entries: On the third day of shitemas my velour seats gave to me.. a case of pregnancy On the third day of shitemas my Jaguar gave to meeeeee, Three broken light bulbs, Two knackered ball joints, And a p-u-ddle on the g-a-rage flooooor On the 3rd day of shitemas I risked an MOT...003 Play in wishbone... On the third day of shitemas duff door seals gave to me :Three drenched footwells... On the 3rd day of shitemas someone gave to me, a 3 cylinder Daewoo Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Moog Posted November 30, 2017 Share Posted November 30, 2017 Just to get the juices flowing... One of the prizes on offer.... MorrisItalSLX, Craig the Princess and adw1977 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John F Posted November 30, 2017 Share Posted November 30, 2017 Just to get the juices flowing... I see what you did there Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stanky Posted December 1, 2017 Author Share Posted December 1, 2017 Day four choice picks On the fourth day of shitemas Red Robbo gave to me...Four meters of welding neededOn the 4th day of shitemas, upon the Bay of e... I impulse-bought a WBODOn the fourth day of shitemas, someone gave to me, Four perished tyres Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Junkman Posted December 2, 2017 Share Posted December 2, 2017 I don't know any people that manages to make a bigger shambles of Christmas than the English. Thus I don you this. Stanky and pshome 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stanky Posted December 2, 2017 Author Share Posted December 2, 2017 Some picks from day 5 theshadow gave to me... FIVE FOOOOORD KAAAAASAt the 5th day of shitemas ISIS gave to me.. five R20, all for freeOn the fifth day of shitemas an oil leak revealed to me; Five shagged O rings...On the fifth day of shitemas my Jaguar gave to meeeeee Fiiivvveee MPGeee The Moog 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stanky Posted December 3, 2017 Author Share Posted December 3, 2017 A selection from day 6 On the 6th day of shitemas I sorted out my scrap... six Fiats to weigh-in...On the sixth day of shitemas my V6 gave to me Six pots a-throbbingOn the sixth day of shitemas someone gave to me - a Six seater MultiplaOn the 6th day oh shitemas a raffled 604 came to me, i'm now a divorceeOn the sixth day of shitemas my Jaguar gave to meeeeee - Six missing wheelnuts Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sloth in a bowl Posted December 3, 2017 Share Posted December 3, 2017 On the first day of Shitemas my true love sent to me, an Escort in a Pear* tree Supernaut, Stanky, holbeck and 3 others 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stanky Posted December 4, 2017 Author Share Posted December 4, 2017 Day 7 entries worthy of mention On the 7th day of shitemas ebay gave to me, a crowbar since i lost my keyOn the seventh day of shitemas, leboncoin gave to me - Seven Simcas rattlingon the 7th day of ASmas my range rover gave to me- firing on all 7!On the seventh day of shitemas my Jaguar gave to meeeeee - Seven carpark scratchesOn the seventh day of shitemas Red Robbo gave to me - my missing 7mm socket On the 7th day of shitemas I'm not surprised to see... seven SWMBOs a-swearing Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stanky Posted December 4, 2017 Author Share Posted December 4, 2017 Another teaser of what exciting prizes you could win. You TOO could be as suave* and sophisticated* as this handsome chap with the strictly limited and highly sought after, hand-crafted from the finest stainless steel and (probably) Mazak, medallion. Tshirt available by separate negotiation to complete the look. Pictures without the tshirt available to all, whether they want them or not, unless ransom paid within 24 hours. used notes. No consecutive numbers. Supernaut and The Moog 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John F Posted December 4, 2017 Share Posted December 4, 2017 Speaking of rollin', is that the smallest rollie in the world in your mouth? Stanky 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stanky Posted December 4, 2017 Author Share Posted December 4, 2017 Sadly not, my smoking days are over! Its a lip-ring Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stanky Posted December 5, 2017 Author Share Posted December 5, 2017 Day 8 - into the closing straight On the 8th day of shitemas Talbot gave to me... a V8 PRV, but it was only reverieOn the eighth day of Shitemas,a slipped cam belt gave to me - Eight valves a bending...On the eighth day of shitemas my Jaguar gave to meeeeee - Eight rusty patchesOn the eighth day off shitemas Red Robbo gave to me - 8 grazed knucklesOn the 8th day of shitemas, Sod's law gave to me.... eight rads a-leaking...On the 8th day of Shitemas, my Kia gave to me 8 missing wheel nuts Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Talbot Posted December 6, 2017 Share Posted December 6, 2017 This was written by a couple of friends a few years back, and slightly modified seems appropriate here. Not an entry in the competition, but fits the tune and is all on one subject: On the Twelfth day of Shitemas, my garage gave to me: Twelve leaky O-rings,Eleven blowing gaskets,Ten ragged edges,Nine worn-out bushes,Eight miles of welding,Seven fraying seatbelts,Six failed glowplugs,Five piston rings, with blow by,Four perished tyres,Three blown bulbs,Two cloudy lamps,And a badly failed MOT. Supernaut 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LC Torana Posted December 6, 2017 Share Posted December 6, 2017 On the 5th day of the Test Match, the yobbos had for lunch:5 Chiko Rolls4 Kentucky Fried3 meat pies2 sausage rollsand an Esky full of Fosters. MorrisItalSLX 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stanky Posted December 7, 2017 Author Share Posted December 7, 2017 Day 9 - because I forgot to update yesterday On the 9th day of shitemas my candyman gave to me... a 405 in psychedelic liveryOn the 9th day of shitemas I gave my MGB... nine hours of weldingOn the ninth day of shitemas my Jaguar gave to meeeeee - Nine warning lightsOn the ninth day off shitemas Red Robbo gave to me, a 9/16th spanner Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stanky Posted December 7, 2017 Author Share Posted December 7, 2017 Day 10 to bring us up to date On the tenth day of shitemas leboncoin showed to me - Ten Tagoras... tempting!On the tenth day off shitemas someone gave to me, Half a Renault 20 if ISIS haven't banned Christmas yet,On the tenth day of shitemas my Jaguar gave to meeeeee - Ten loose connectionsOn the 10th day of shitemas i broke my knee... that 104 is way too small for me.On the 10th day of shitemas, I found much to my glee... 10 Fords on Leboncoin Craig the Princess 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stanky Posted December 8, 2017 Author Share Posted December 8, 2017 Almost there now On the eleventh day of shitemas Joe Lucas gave to me; Eleven electric nightmaresOn the eleventh day of shitemas my Jaguar gave to meeeeee Eleven MOT advisoriesOn the 11th day of shitemas Santa gave to me... a railpass for a year, collections are now freeOn the eleventh day off shitemas Red Robbo gave to me, Eleven fault codes showingOn the 11th day of shitemas, I hit a bloody tree... eleven brake pipes a-leaking The Moog 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stanky Posted December 8, 2017 Author Share Posted December 8, 2017 The top 3 are very very close, and tomorrow is the final day. Entries on the backs of postage stamps please! The Moog 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stanky Posted December 9, 2017 Author Share Posted December 9, 2017 Picks of the final day's entries. Winners to be announced tomorrow! On the twelfth day of shitemas my gumtree ad brought to me; Twelve twats mouth-breathingOn the twelveth day off shitemas ECP gave to me, The wrong part twelve timesOn the twelfth day of shitemas my Jaguar gave to meeeeee Twelve reasons to scrap itOn the 12th day of shitemas, a barn find brought to me... 12 Humbers crumbling...On the 12th day of shitemas AS gave to me... a fun forum for another yeeear Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stanky Posted December 10, 2017 Author Share Posted December 10, 2017 And on the 13th Day of Shite-mas we had some WINNERS! Thanks all for your valuable contributions, and for being good sports. We have 4 unmissable prizes which we'll send out to the top 4 placed entrats over the last 12 days. As I said yesterday the top 5 places were very closely fought but the top 4 were: John FPShomeAndy W201Craigtheprincess Well done you 4, and thanks for your contributions everyone else! Winners, please PM me or the 12days account with your addresses and we'll get the prizes posted to you ASAP, ideally in time for Christmas. Thanks again all! pshome, Craig the Princess and John F 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John F Posted December 13, 2017 Share Posted December 13, 2017 Set of excellent 'Crap Trumps' arrived today, thanks! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pshome Posted December 30, 2017 Share Posted December 30, 2017 Man with white truck ringed at my door today and handed me this: Perfect fit! Thanks chaps! Stanky, The Moog, Craig the Princess and 1 other 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndyW201 Posted December 30, 2017 Share Posted December 30, 2017 And, thanks to my pressie, I have been opening bottles like a boss over Christmas. Cheers guys! Stanky, adw1977, pshome and 1 other 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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