The Epic Austrian owned R16 from Germany doing French things in a Parallel Universe near England Saga

[Eddie Honda]

The 107 Facet has a rubbish hard-to-clean cover.

 

Much better both tonally and aesthetically is the 106 Hi-Hi

 

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

Friedland is one of the camps in Germany where illegal immigrants are - erm - concentrated.

That door bell indeed looks like it came straight from there.

They were manufactured in Stockport, so...

[Junkman]

Stockport, home to all sorts of noise making equipment you wouldn't believe you can still buy.

Those terminally shit PA systems they use in airports and railway stations are also made in Stockport.

[SiC]

Those door bells always irritated me. They look like a whole set of switches that need to be all switched to the same way. I've always wondered how they decided and came upon that pattern.

 

Edit: Just realised that it appears that the different tones these classic doorbells make can be identified by the outside casing. One fact to definitely add to the long term memory bank of random knowledge that can break awkward silences.

[Junkman]

I should hope it has a maximum of 3 tones and a repertoire of 4 tunes, 2 being 'Mary Had a Little Lamb' and 'Jingle Bells'.

 

And 'Happy Birthday To You'.

[Eddie Honda]

This is the only acceptable doorbell. 

 

 

It does 'ding dong'. 

 

No it doesn't, that's the preserve of the D117 - Ding-Dong

 

[Junkman]

In other, not so doorbell related news, I kind of fixed the carburetter, ordered a gasket kit for it and a replacement carb for good measure.

 

Let me explain.

 

From the onset, the car had a tendency to tickover roughly and occasionally stall when you came to a stop.

However, this was intermittent and for the most part, it runs fine, but it also does cog a bit when maintaining

a constant speed, which you thankfully rarely have an opportunity for in England.

 

The issue became more pronounced on the way to and fro the now heroically group funded R30.

(why do I have to pay for everything myself?)

Hence everything that was accessible without removing the carb from the car was removed and cleaned.

There were indeed some molecules of dirt baked onto the mixture and idle air control screws, which in carburetter terms

means there were elephants living in it. Also, the rubber seals for those screws are rock hard, thus I suspect

some extraneous air is being pulled in, which is Solex's enemy number 1.

Hence a complete carb overhaul is unavoidable.

 

Thus some internet searchage was done and it turned out

 

- that my car has not the standard carburetter fitted

 

- the carburetter it has is the Blue Mauritius of carburetters, at least this side of a Motorcraft variable venturi 4BBL

 

- an overhaul kit is only available from a German company specialising in Fiat Abarths

 

- exactly one of those carburetters is available for purchase from an auto recycler in France

 

 

For these and some other all too* understandable** reasons, the following chain of events got triggered:

 

- the overhaul kit was ordered from the company in Germany

 

- the carburetter available from the French auto recycler was ordered just because it was available

 

 

Consequently a plan, which of course will go wrong, was devised:

 

- Rebuild the carb from France with the overhaul kit from Germany upon arrival

 

- Replace the carb that's in the car now with the rebuilt one

 

 

Should the rebuilt carb not work for some odd reason (which will happen), I can always swap back the carb I have now (which will happen).

Only that then the carb I have now won't work anymore either (an assumption based on experience).

 

 

As for the carburetters as such:

 

During the car's lifetime, someone tossed the original Solex DISA single throat carb and inlet manifold and replaced them with a Solex EIE

twin throat carb and the inlet manifold presumably off a Renault 15.

Those Solex EIE carbs appear to be like shit from a toothed rocking hen and highly sort after by those Gordini, Alpine, Europa and Abarth lickers

who shit on Webers, which I can fully understand. This brought out the speculator in me, a surefire method to create the most devastating

backfire scenario imaginable. Because part of the plan (which will go wrong, remember?) is to flog the excess carb once the dust has settled.

 

But one thing is for certain. My R16 is a hot rod. Or rat rod. Or some fucking thing.

 

Be it as it may, I still recommend the two throat carburetter upgrade to every R16 owner complaining his Viktoria Modesta spec example is a tad lazy.

The manifolds are a dime a dozen and there are various more common and garden variety carbs available that will do the job.

 

Since my car, despite being the allegedly wheezy 1470cc non hemi, thus not being recommended by the Junkfather, goes like shit off a polished shovel

and I may, or may not know, from personal experience or other, that my car easily exceeds the factory top speed of 87.5 OMGMPH.

Not according to the speedo, mind. According to the GPS! How fucking Flic spec is that? Baise moi!

 

 

On an entirely different note, I drained and flushed the cooling system again and added some non brewed condiment and antifreeze.

Good thing it was New Moon and Wayne Cochran's ghost was floating around when I commenced the bleeding bleeding procedure.

[Junkman]

My R16 an I drove to St Albans today. Throughout the journey it was toodark to pap, so photosd will follow tomorrow.

On the entire trip, the car didn't put a foot wrong, except the driver's door window winder exploded, which was shocking.

It happened as soon as I hit the motorway for the only five miles of motorway on this trip.

Is the car trying to tell me something? Like it's agreeing to my dogma that motorways in the UK are shit?

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

It did that window winder thing when I was driving it once. It is very alarming to suddenly hear a selection box of metal parts cascading onto a metal kick plate while driving along. 

[Junkman]

No shit, I almost shat myself.

[Junkman]

Also, motorway cruising speed is now 130 clicks, up twenty from when we picked the car up.

[Junkman]

Today the fanbelt snapped - on the way back from work to hotel.

 

A good man (Dubblyella) gave a wise man (because he put it into the spare wheel) a new one ages ago.

Hence I was able* to change it at the roadside. In the dark. Wearing a suit. No, not a boiler suit.

 

Enter Renault's unique French way of tensioning a belt - the pulley consists of two dished discs, which are held together by four bolts.

The idea is to put shim plates between those, so the distance determines the belt tension. Narrower together, tension higher,

more shims added, tension slacker. Get it?

Says in the manual to add the leftover shims to the outside of the front disc.

Only that there were exactly sod all in my car, between the discs, or otherwise. So there is only one tension possible, regardless of belt.

 

Hence hope is now my co-pilot.

[Felly Magic]

This needs a V8 conversion of at least 400ci

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

Enter Renault's unique French way of tensioning a belt - the pulley consists of two dished discs, which are held together by four bolts.

The idea is to put shim plates between those, so the distance determines the belt tension. Narrower together, tension higher,

more shims added, tension slacker. Get it?

 

 

Fanbelt CVT

 

(except without the C)

[Junkman]

And now for the literally impaired (i.e. all of you), picksherz!

 

Keep your Parisian car all Parisian with a Parisian Kleber fanbelt:

 

 

 

Window windor fickst:

 

 

 

Ooooh!

 

 

 

The place I'm staying at greets you with these wonderful stained windows:

 

 

And once again without flash:

 

 

 

Upstairs is this conference centre:

 

 

 

A shite selfie:

 

 

 

 

There are some interesting* pictures from last week on the walls:

 

 

 

 

That shite at the bottom right in the second pic is a Shitrun 5CV Truffle:

 

 

 

 

Okay.

 

I beer now.

[Felly Magic]

So glad the ugly grey thing parked nose in, that looks a proper stylish gaff you are lodging in, reminds me of a lot of small hotels on the Oile of Woight where it is forever 1957 

[SiC]

What does the Junkman do for a living?

[Junkman]

that looks a proper stylish gaff you are lodging in, reminds me of a lot of small hotels on the Oile of Woight where it is forever 1957 

 

Welcome to Junkman's Wonderful World of Shabby Chic Abodes.

People who travelled with me might or might not confirm that I have a real talent for finding digs

unsuitable for the package tourist, without racking up a lavish expense bill, apart from the bar tab.

 

However, this time I think I really outdid myself.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Felly Magic]

WOW! That place looks spot on

[RobT]

Busy place...looks like a modern day Winchester Club.

[Felly Magic]

I could just see Herr Von Junkman propping up the bar with a V.A.T LOL

[Junkman]

The place is busier than the photos may suggest.

It wasn't easy to shoot them the exact second when no people were in these spots.

[pshome]

it didn't have funny stairs though, did it?

[mercrocker]

Where else in the world could you read a thread like this?   It should be serialised on some obscure Freeview channel.

[Junkman]

it didn't have funny stairs though, did it?

 

 

Like so?

 

[Junkman]

In less hotel related news, the new fanbelt actually makes the entire car run smoother, who would have thought?

Another side effect is that the water now actually gets pumped around, which means the heater is even better.

Yes, an R16 can serve as an impromptu sauna.

 

On the down side, I'm afraid the tension is too high, due to lack of shims, which btw. aren't available anywhere.

I only hope it will survive the 200 mile trip home tomorrow.

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

Of course it will. And even if it doesn't, you've still got that one Green Flag call out left before they cancel your membership.

 

Shims can't be hard to make. Just a circle with some holes drilled in it.

[Felly Magic]

Conrad I think you just volunteered yourself to make said shims LOL

[Conrad D. Conelrad]

If he buys me some Roses in the metal tin, I'll make him some shims. 

[SiC]

Because the shims will be made out of the tin?