The Epic Austrian owned R16 from Germany doing French things in a Parallel Universe near England Saga

[Cleon-Fonte]

Would it be even more of a mindfuck if I told you that the signs are actually referring to Manchester and Leeds Bradford Airport separately, but obviously no-one at Leeds City Council has thought through that putting an airport symbol next to the word Manchester on every sign may lead people to assume they were instead heading towards Manchester Airport.

 

Leeds is a confusing place. 

[Junkman]

The real problem is however, that no matter how difficult a job and how much it pisses you off,
it rewards you with this:
 

 
And once you have this, a life without it is impossible.

[Junkman]

Would it be even more of a mindfuck...

 

Yes.

[Junkman]

All the while Dubbleyellla's Deisl Aldi shat it's fucking alternator.

German quality, my arse.

 

I can't possibly drink enough I want to piss on that loser shit.

[Felly Magic]

If Trigger did the Leeds outer ring road challenge, he would still be driving round looking lost and scared in 2019, it goes through the badlands of Belle Isle, Middleton and Seacroft,, and vanishes completely around Woodlesford & Swillington

[Junkman]

If I did the Leeds outer ring road challenge, I'd be home by now,

because I have exactly the square root of fuck all time for some mongtarded shit like that.

 

Besides, you should have seen the retarded pretentious wank they were not really driving there.

[Cleon-Fonte]

Woodlesford & Swillington

 

If you go to either of those places you know you're probably never coming back.

[Junkman]

You bet I would.

I haven't seen anything this under my standards in all my life and I don't have high standards.

 

I am seriously hard pressed to come up with anything more shit.

 

And I always thought I've seen a lot.

[Felly Magic]

If you go to either of those places you know you're probably never coming back.

 

I used to live in Kippax, so know the area like the back of my hand

[Junkman]

BTW this includes Croatia and Bradford.

[Felly Magic]

The inner ring road is much worse, a few years back some roads had the traffic flow reversed, it caused bloody mayhem as to get to certain parts you had to do almost a full loop, and when they pedestrianised Briggate & made Vicar Lane a 2 way road for buses and taxis, all I can say is AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH! I suspect the road planners live in somewhere like Harrogate or Linton, and never venture anywhere near Leeds

[Junkman]

Well, Harrogate and Linton ARE near Leeds.

But they did a bloody good job to fuck that fact up.

[Felly Magic]

Could be worse, could be..... LINCOLNSHIRE, thar be witches and a plumber that makes weird shite and puts it on youtube

[Junkman]

Oh Jeezers fuck, No!

[Junkman]

Be it as it may, Doubleyeller's FEUGOET is way better as I imagined it.

Imagine my disappointment when everything I checked turned out to be half as fucked as I hoped for.

This is a solid old heap that is just fucked in every respect that can be fixed.

[The Reverend Bluejeans]

There is only one way to traverse Leeds, and that is by train and then taxi. DO NOT DRIVE THERE.

[The Reverend Bluejeans]

.

[Eddie Honda]

And the signposting is even worse. It's British. The most dismal signposting the World has ever seen.

 

This is horseshit. That accolade belongs to Ireland.

[JeeExEll]

Interesting R16 pic.

 

[PhilA]

I like that, above. Particularly as it was designed to have a number plate, a feature car designers today seen to have forgotten about.

[Sloth in a bowl]

To everybody else

 

Do not tell Junkman that Walsall has a ring road. He may not survive exposure to the reality.

 

 

Yours

 

Sloth in a Bowl

[richardmorris]

So off this ringroad, mind, I had to travel the fucking World to encounter such a goddamn wanked on ringroad,

I found myself in a back alley. They say it's in Leeds, I say it's in the middle of where you don't want to be..

And there were people you'd run away from if it were nighttime.

 

 

Fucking run!

 

Also note the woeful piece of German tat in the background, more of which later.

Looks like an episode of the sweeny!

[Ghosty]

 

Also note the woeful piece of German tat in the background, more of which later.

 

 

Nah, you're alright ta. Had enough of B5s for a lifetime.

 

(also what is it with us lot and taking pictures of our cars up Holme Moss?)

[Junkman]

Looks like an episode of the sweeny!

 

Was more like an episode of Laurel and three Hardys.

[Felly Magic]

And the 16 went all French and had a tantrum, I do hope this Flame ends up back on the road, those headlamp wipers will give Mr D Wobbler of this parish a hot flush!

[Junkman]

The 16 was actually innocent.

Apparently I had forgotten to tighten the jubilee clip of the bottom radiator hose at my past coolant system fixerage.

After a seriously long incline with Laurel, two of the Hardys and lots of other tools on board, we stopped at a layby to enjoy the view.

It was only then that it decided on incontinence. It was duly fixed by tightening said jubilee clip and all was fine.

 

Today it received another flush and fillage, this time with a healthy dose of white vinegar instead of dishwasher tablets.

There was still a lot of brown sleech coming out of it and there was a layer of sediment at the bottom of the Branston jar.

So it's going to be another round of trying to get all that stuff out before the final fillage with proper antifreeze will happen.

[The Reverend Bluejeans]

Quick question Junkmann.

 

Your compatriots refer to BMW's as 5er, 6er etc. That's normal. That's AustroGerman.

 

Have you noticed how tossrags in this country are now referring to their £800 528i as a 5er? 

 

I feel that you must call your Renoit a 16er.

 

Beat these fuckers at their own game.

[dollywobbler]

Interesting. Sort of. But did the headlamp wipers work? Surely they can't be seized.

[Junkman]

In the heat of the proceedings, I think the wipers remained unchecked.

 

In terms of the R16, it did receive another bleeding procedure and seeing that there is still a lot of bog in the cooling system,

five more dishwasher tablets.

 

The brakes aren't yet what I would like them to be, the main issue being that the rear brakes now severely overbrake.

As we found out, it has the second generation calipers fitted up front, but still the first generation master cylinder.

Some research revealed, that the inner diameter of the cylinder was reduced from 20.6 to 19mm, which,

due to some geometrics, is an almost 20% reduction in area. When applying what's left of my Physics studies of yore,

this means that the later master cylinder creates substantially more hydraulic pressure at any given pedal force.

I hence ordered one of those now.

[Junkman]

Today's Austrian plan in England was to change a black rotor button for a brown one

 

 

and a brown distributor cap for a black one.

 

 

 

Futhermore changage of sparking plugs and leads was planned.

Changing the sparking plugs further turned out to be not a bad idea due to the fact that someone had put in the wrong ones:

 

 

Whereas changing the plug leads turned out to be a bad idea from the onset:

 

 

 

What happened next can only be classed as French.

 

1. In order to properly push a plug lead connector onto this spark plug ideally the alternator should be removed. Which I didn't do. Because lazybones.

 

 

2. After cap, rotor, all plugs and leads were changed, the car ran like shit. I suspected not removing the alternator had prevented me from properly pushing the lead onto the plug,

    however, this was not the case.

 

3. After putting the brown cap back on and putting the original leads back in, the car runs like never before. But only the rotor and the plugs were now actually changed.

 

 

So I said sod it and left it like this after launching the Halford's leads into my neighbour's garden.

 

In further news, the coolant now at least turned from shit to piss:

 

 

 

And I found this gem way back on the rocker cover: